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A Great Liar, but a Great Man.
In a stove store yesterday a marf
tame rushing in and said to the
proprietor:
“Have you got into lying for a
trade?”
“v )h. no.”
“Well, you lied about that
stove.”
“Man on his way up there now
to put it up Rushed to death,
vou know. Hope .you ihaven’t suf
fered.”
The ne-it caller was a woman,
who fastened -a void glare on the
stove Ka*m and deliberately said ;
“IT! never do a cent’s worth of
business with you again if I live
here fifty years.”
“Stovepipe is on the wagon there
and ready to go up, ma’am. Woke
up in the night to hope you
•wouldn’t be put out.”
The third caller was a boy, who
stooci in the door and called.
•“Hey, you! my father says he’d
like to knock your head oil'.”
■“Oh, yes, you are Mr. Blank’s
son. Just sent a man up to your
house with that damper ten mm
artes ago. Lost ttio sale «f a stove
to hurry him off.”
“Are those fair samples of vour
collers?” was asked the dealer.
“Just about. I catch it about
twenty times a day at this season
of the year.”
“And vos rawer'talk back?”
“Never. I bustle and do t’iao
best I can, and if a kicker coaums'
in I hold my peace or talk taffy.,
One word back talk would ieose
their trade. Everybody waits tell
the last minute for a stove or re
pairs, and then everybody cowres
with a rush, There comes ta
woman to blow me up about fixing
a door to a stove. That door has
been broken for five years, but it’s
only within the past week that she
has decided to have it fixed.
She’ll be savage, but I’ll mollify'
her some way and get that stove
down bv Monday. So long—my
busy day ”
There is still a surplus of $46,-
000.000 in the United States
Treasury, exclusive of nearly $25,-
(>OO,OOO in subsidiary silver coin
age which is not availablo for
debt paymenrs. Large as is this
balance, it is not sufficient to war
rant a repeal or a considerable re
duction of the internal revenue
taxes on w 1 i ky and tobao’O in
oonner tioi wi h Ihe programme of
extra v ug mi expenditure for steam
ship subsidy, o rs, fortifications
aid < n-r schemes of sur} 1 s
} u ting. Out should the intern 1
r, vtnue v teiu be aoojidied, or
undermined bv repeal of the taxes
ou fruit brand e . it would become
all the more necessary to reduce 1
it ie tauff to a st. ret revenue basis
i i o dor to meet current expendi
tures of Goven inent, pay off the
p ih ie debt, and piovide for the
growing peUerou iit«. utletup.*-
ing to tamper with the inten 1
revenue system the tariff inonge,
are treading on ticklh-h ground.
®»r?rkirn' Fictitious Names.
Ly.nciim-Ru, Va., Oct. 28.— Th.
names of 2,087 colored voters wen
stricken from the poll books yes
terday as dead or removed, leaving
1.898 names on the colored lit-'
M a.hone leaders have begun actio
in the corporation court to restor*
'the nsßVies.
In order to prove that the prices
the farmers obtain for corn, wheat,
cotton, etc., are not governed by
the price at which they can sell
the surplus of those commodities
above the demand of the home
market the American Economist
instances the fact that the femurs
of Massachusetts sold their corn at
70 cents a bushel, while the Ne
braska farmers could only get 19
cents per bushel. The Economist
would have the farmers believe,
that the Massachusetts corn sold
for 70 cents because it w-as dis
posed of in the home market,
while the Nebraska corn brought
on!} r 1$ cents because it was sold
for the foreign market. It is hard
to deal patiently with such drivel
as this. The price paid in Massa
chusetts for corn was the price of
Nebraska com laid down in Massa
chusetts, with cartage, handling,
storage, freight and commissions
added. Otherwise why should not
Massachusetts (consumers buv the
chean Neomska corn? And wlp
do the Massachusetts farmers de
sert their farms and their “home
market” and go West to raise
19-cent corn in Nebraska? The
Economist is protection-mad, an<
its writers should take a vacatior
for the fjtooverv of their wits.
Rat-catiching is still going on at
the White House; but some of the
grayest and sharpest rats refrain
from being ferreted out.
Hr. J. A, Bfoan4ion, ot Vvnvndt i
gua, N. Y-, w*.* arrested and
locked up a of days since
for running nvor a Worn an. Her
injuries were not serious, but,
thinking he had killed her, he
grew frantic. He was then re
leased. Next morning his wife
found him dead from an overdose
ot morphine, which lie had taken
habitually to ease pfliß.
Even the most vigorous and health
people have at times a feeling of Gh-'-
tudo aixi wearil ess. To dispel tt>«
feeling take Dr. J H. McLean’s Sat
parilla; u will impart vitality and vig
or. For sale by C off.
Settle up or be sued. We are
ti’ed waiting ou you.
l i-iauy - u**
» tiro's on A.* n from ovot - »rk w liousehold
ons Brown’* Iron Hitters
, i.uidii i v *3 nys»ieiii. ai»is »■ iye-ilon. rti’iovei ox
of IV.ti. aud ci"®« inmli.* i ®t»nutDfc
If l»rtilth aud life are worth ansthiirg
t d you atv feeling or* of .sorts and
ti , d out. tone up your i •■ten: by tak
in Dr- J. H AIcLpA. j Sarsaparila
V.oio's,
mKammummmmmmmmmMmmmmnmmn m-a^nn
Do You Wish to Keep up with the IVo*
gress of Dade County?
*nrm mu hi i 1 1
Subscribe for
The Dade County Weekly Timm,
It will keep you posted on the transfers of
Beal Estate, New Enterprises
to be started, © jV*
DADE COUNTY
I »
Is the richest mineral county in the ‘“Em
pire State of the South.”
Every man, woman and child in the county
should read
“THE TIMES. ’
WORK
'“‘THE TIMES 1 ’ has now a first class job primer, an 4 v
prepared to do first class woikat as nessouable rale- hs-ocm?-
•istent with first class woi k. bend us your job work
rn ( .
i . t I ; i ](>? S
P O H< x 49 Trenton Git,
IUTM.
IS ATTAINED BY THE TJSH OF THE OBUEB&ATM9
3, NEW SUNSHINE RANGE,
Which ir< malm ha toy with or RESERVOIR,
HIGH SHELF, HIGH CLOSET, LOW CLOSET sWATEHMBL
mfmil Can heat your house thorough-
Will I »y, HEALTHFULLY and ECO'
W %0W NOMICALLY with the §1
■ TORRID STEEL DRUM FURNACE. \ W
Those who use the TORRID always praise Vp
It. Bendfor FURNACE BOOK giving heat- UpftHv
Ing capacity and prioes.
ORR PAINTER A 60, iiENHiI, PL