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The effort to have the constitutional
bensus of 1800 furnish a complete list of
the survivors of the late war met with
fcuch opposition that it was abandoned.
I Massacliusetta the gm
has tried ■ UC
tional qualification for voters f
tears; and, in the the opinion
Atlanta Constitution j she is not likely to
abolish it, ____
The Philadelphia Inquirer editorially
remarks: “It is noted that, during
and 1885, more-than 9000 lives were
in the battles around that wretchea
town in the Soudan which the Mahdi is
now besieging. Hundreds more,have
been lost since then, and yet nobody
seems to know whether the town is
named Suakim or Suakin.”
decreasing The HLJUfexiiUi __ ____- ... ... .
outside the cities. The
school census of 1888 showed that while
there were in the State in 1880 789' 076
males under twenty-one, in July of that
year there were 843,976. This is a gain
of 54,800, bast th
was 83,217, sho
rest of the State
was hamiv anil jvn.rwmin rp„ ~L. yl
into ^ lu " the ls horrors of civil and all
war,
thifc_thfl Chicago. ^ J5T«r«W charges, has
_ js l‘
Zf&mn nd f . L (f
a
■ chief mar plot,”bunfie*s Lb oi r*n gtahtfi
and the United Slates are not clear.
mi a mr&m tiring* Tan?
lish universities of Oxfonfand
bridge, with all their arts and glorious
SL MnenSazcm^ t^edftttflgfippledS
iropei
;ai
Australia jSBSSyRS* and some poii^t * pu tye' raq
y *3
coasf”of North America naturally lah
mapa d lor for suen such a a convenience. couvci It w ill be *
a mlig ffinS *15$fq*Athe colui—* em<etsk
tralia
large asum as would be required to buy
» 1
Tableshaf ffecoi -Y ,h.wi„ |
e coi a 5 ««
total asse^rnenUyi.lasS of real estate,
per sotei.t|, railroads, etc., m the fcouth
ern Btatfel to be $3,681,740,945. The
If xWWr^p thTsouthern nf taxable M
wealth in each
• 1880, . ___ together with th(|p|rcopt
since ? |e
of gain of each during tkO sliJl pided:
Alabama, $107,235,012, 69 per cent; Ar
kansas 70100, $74 otir’p 808 385 77- hJ Florida *67 -
(01,091, 211; Georgia, - $105,7¥ffWff4ff
Kentucky, $190,015,209,50; Louisiana,
$35,903,541, 2(b31ississippi, $30,641,545,
26iNorih Carolina, $5~,0 j 3, 930, 30;South
Carolina, $34,055,47* 20; Tennessee,
$101,3^024, 44; Virgin*, $03 351,174,
18;
204,176,604. The population in the
States named has increased nearly 5,500,
000 since the cen S^ Of talk < . I 1
-
Edward .... Atkinson, . the well ... known sta- ,
tisticlan, says that the actual losses by
fire in-the United. States range from
£00,000,000 :#*«>»,« <«*:««.
The cost-of maintaining insurance com
panies conducted as thet now are, is
from $35,000,000 to ■$40,000,000. The
cost of sust Aiihir Jr fiftnir mil in i»*i in nut
i«- less a (i, than a „ *MTma $&>,000,07)57 Thin Thus (SAag'gFe
gate fire tax per annum is from $1(50,
OOfiJMDto J$tt(%.000; t®. TB^e main
thing is to save with respect the $35,
° 00 Q -°-” —A-i' tin non 0 0 one 0 whlch J 3the °° st
coflulicring ’ the ’. (yresent : of in
of system
ance- About one ha lf the entire sum,
red J hv one
single . , changegin , . . tne conduct of ♦».„ the
work'; that idAy making itAecessary
or expedient |§| the person cMiring in
surance to apply directly to tne officers
o, om.ro,. „.
stead of having the solictors of the com- •
panies apply to the insurer for the sake
of a commssion which must come out
IWQO ow
| The Chicago Herald declares that
“one of the jam;: long felt wants of this couu
try already is a have nQPpbl rifle cannon and range. our troops, " e i
range c ,
being loeated in thinly peopled districts,
can always find plenty of open 1 M tfround
, for nfie .„ practice, .. ~, but , ' we , have never had .
a ing cannon to find range. that It this is therefore long-felt gratify- want is J
Government' i
about to be supplied. The ;
if now clearing a piece of land, to be used j
for this ^ M ll . ^ ,
wilds oil^ewWe^e^, tsS tWsckeiile is
to clear out a piece of the forest eight
>na one-bait mil«> long t »d thm-qimr
ters ofamilew.de. The testing of guns
for the American-navy at the works
where they J are built is usually destruo
■
live , of , the works i. q*i>|pm«||» -mi in%
perfectly tested desfMMpiMP dpy wr||MA yi
ihipboard, are in the na
»nd men A cannon ranee re -
mote fastnesses of . New w Jersey Tersev where
guns may be thoroughly tested will re
move these dangers and the Jersey
most) iffifjos nil ijiarwiii in iiiiT uni fti a tremeu
lous
DEVOtfiD TO THE INTEREST OP LINCOLN
QUESTIONING.
If the bird
Has) no listener, wrapt, adoring—
It its songs in joyous soaring
J. fi f oMou-Ailipf £^1 Upon tk# entranced air unheard;
s*'" 1 'V thawoiden hM&tig sunbeam glsnced,
t the bird Was flinging.
What would be the use Of singing?
If the flower,
Lifting hjj Its petaled crowd
Where the sun comes flit’ririg down;
I , ItJp _ N ever felt the summer shower
: busy, vagrant bees
' ‘Ctme to woo it with the breeze—
If no golden light was flooding
W’hat would be the use of budding!
If the heart
Never felt the quick pulsation.
Never knew the sweet elation
That of faithful love is part—
tfTSSBfSraafcSf That true hearts delight in giving,
Wh*t would be the use of living?
—Cora Fabbri, in Mail and Express.
THE BLACKKHIN0CEE0S
e the most
should to mau I
give i .I. the black rhinoceros i , of
Africa t the proud distinction. I could
~*° v *
gf f ous ^foe, thgn the lion, tiger or any
ways nuiig ryjrgo rsrtlKrwacw 8 lffelP mfieceros 5 al "
“Jr H « d ° es not know what
A®?! IS. -• He W0U1Q w pu d charo-e char g° IDto into an an n army rm v
I ni A , AfWglh i imnten Ho ettn
; ee^eieated J agent onty fpr h^ the being animal kiiicd. house at
•
'b eer 9J > wttuh s W c i'
a «j . ,
Juc^Mle tU y fill anymore
board, Hb.
K'sss’sspzA
vrhkh -ark*™ ^ f^i
■f/oeSlfwl'abd .p.1 y W i 3
out TOT fhr the the next next two two years Up he repeated a
his foolishness at least once a day,
MhisSrfrflifhtl^™?iv*«f]d mer™/ ^t iDg
show for a '
]&SS^SthS youwftnd a ’the
' er v
-
, fi
•*!&»««— ° ith * Sid h h * xski-., 0 ^ S " 6 for a fuss
wee* « p the Li f , ust b g>
f bree S bes idn hn!,cp ‘*a lte *J' e
] 5 ’
UrtJ?°.S , 0 !! t e .P k < ?“. . " nd a bar , g e * h e
. ’
- .
T\iif^v. u ^ *i 1 °
ant i rH t ® n ^ ® d for tha expedi- ,
lio a bl - nl n j al,out tbo , R a "' u
w „ could^ns^hiv , iv! , SIfa p plianee
^he we w^T rbin™. f n a h', 1 11 bad an
b, »„h alt H n ? K b
0 f^he black them^ sneeiel »’ T di/nnf 1 h ^!^° ucb u
stock in
Three data webanlcdlshnfnanrt^h-A ta thp north nf tha n„irh
town n named named wenauled ashore and made
abqveTlfe streanL TLs 'bVuff^wu^W
sloped off into a great suamp or rice
be lc *- J he rice stood up six or seven
e( fe bl g b ’ wl ul<i thc «V>uad was perfectly
dry . -It feeding
lor the rhino; jyas a,natural and there kere ground plenty
of that eros,
signs he was at hand. We started
to make one general camp about midway
oa t’^e bluff, but one^ of the Free State
*5E3£ “If dj> live lose
you you all. If rhi
noceros thb here. charge into camp he break every
jg Make camp all the way.”
—Y ' vas a S ood idea, and I ordered
cfflre of one. I took tho
w.thfhd Dutchmen, and the na
tives encamped on each side and about
roda away., As we intended to re
*<»*»**««*• After were made
secure. our camps were
finished, “Josh,” ^ as I called the native
wiio iiau warned me, gathered a lot of
stout creepers and vines and-fnade a de
ce m f r0 “ l of each C«p»p. I>J,attach
. them , stakes and and
ln g to trees wtav
ing an obstruction ^Rout three feet high
tha# We|aughed his head athim^ I*#l. but events proved
was It was about 2
0 c®ck when we lafiqfed, and at 4 we
ion tr.? !
three natives came running up vrith the j
information that a rhinoceros was in ■
eight—directly below my camp. A quar
was a knoll rising out
saw a double horned rhinoceros standing
° n ,be knrdl whh bi 9 be ? d ^ward us
He had , got wind, . 1 and perhaps heard
our
the cries of the natives. These animals
are near sighted, told that and distance this fellow could
not have at what was
in ^ °. f bim - He did not care, how
evert <j With t a snort and a grun^Biow
ere hi s t iea G am Eah arued up twtesing
ground like a wild locomotive.
“Look out! Everybody climb a tree?”
touted “Josh.” and in a minute
were among the limbs.
It was a good move andyeta
Had I been on my htlve feet at just the right
momeht, I could made a valuable
capture without danger. The old fellow
r jver, but for the defence erected by
“Josh.” He struck the vines with a
great.crash, and was sprung back and
off his feet by the rebound. He
for a full minute, and
been d« : fie ground I could hav^
lfs#d;a|o® made him fast afound to one of When his legs he and got
a tree.
up his eyes fell up'm a h:A which one of
the natives had dropped, and he charged
j t> The charge took him back toward
swamp, and ho kept going on till out of
our sight.
LINCOLNTON, GEORGIA, FRIDAY, MARCH 15, 18s9.
-
d noeeros ft j I wa^leady hunting. with Indeed. a new I idea had In AS- of
them. two
Abe natives scattered through
the swamp to investigate, and whin they
returned they reported trail* lending in
•every direction. Three black rhinoceri
had been seep but not disturbed, and it
Was evident that “ola game” would be
tmband whenever Wahtid. I returned
to the swamp With thetn, and Selecting a
*pot where a wide, beaten trail rim in S
straight line for aboiri fifty rods, we dug
a fohr pit feet tw&vc feet Iong, Linedthe 8ix feet wide, and
stakes to deep. 'prerent We edges with
tne earth caving in,
add over. thejyfig%4neiiLjoa» At the end of the of pit covering toward it
camp the staff-, I panted frith a red flag and covered
astray hat. , ,
Wtnle the black rjiinqceros has no fear
and will change an aepSant as Soon as a
dog if once aroused, ha.ig very,auspicious
knew k*a cra||y, that it when was tain hot to hof>e ajcifed. Would We
one
charge the Sag and thtte fall into the pit
if in pujfuit of one of the men, and af
tor dinner I called up all the blacks and
told them my plan. -- if was for Hie best
ranner affioeg themto strip himself of
all superfluous clothing, hunt up a
rhinoceros chanting and prbvokethe creattiredntb
him along the path made ready
Hr <ke purpose. My offer of a gun to
afay ont; who would do thi3 brought fori
ward six men, and I speedily madesa se
lections rTh* man removed greased his
body with an fat ointment made of earth
and animal to limber himself, and
on his mission.
The four of us white men took oor
gun»<snd made out. way *othe bare by knoll.
II seeraedto and have been thrown up the
auis Abandoned. It was six or seven
font feet high, tow ten loot feet across, nAwnna and, nn d («««!« twenty
feet long, and was sloping like a house
roof on all sides. It”was a'good post of
observation, E but, we could see nothing
an tf er e in the big swamp to show that
ft rhiiiocftros was on the biot 6»
UrnTM iftdteur'tefkLw;
it. being midday, that the big beast
and in a oath Which led directly
rax xpssfsxi
more c^rtainl^? by the shrill notes of
ItiiMWWthitlhi. bM con
f«'*‘ e3b j uisel f tbe thelum-
1 n Kbohemo th, ( , a n dt hat its cries are
uttered to warn him that dangrr is near.
The bird is found with buffaloes, ele
? hRBt8 ’ S} 8n d8 ’. a "? of J en f ith ? xe * and
horses. He is - simply after insects Flies ,
fltWto cries' 1
and if garbed utters^shri 11 to
8Cold,n ^ a ^ and r« sentl y ca ' : g bt the
^^srsarsiMasa
waved his flag, and next moment he had
'
'
Nature made- the rhinoceros in the
m °st clumsy manner, and evidently for
° W 5
sjamc. Take n^ni on a strai<?lit line and
he is a runner not to be scorned. A
horse has got to be sure footed and have
good ground dash. to travel on to beat him in
a half-mile The native had about
thirf y fL ‘ et ,be start and whc “ tb ey
P assoa om mound he had lost five feet
?.* b btnln teat,,although g. The rhinoceros running like was greased a big
o unusually black,
and he ran with
saout d ? wn and tail erect. We cheered
the native to encourage him, and away ^
^ 1 W °- F** “ P ^ We had tam
-
«„,„ a ,^
the native would have had to leave the
path he to avoid death. Ashe neared the
pit ran the along the right-hand edge of
it, while rhinoceros thundered along
the centre. He was within twelve feet
of the heels Of the runner when his feet
let go of Solid earth and pitched him
head first into the pit. We heard him
breath out of him. Ashe struck he
rolled over on his pit° right side, and when
we reached, the he was helpless,
When he got it through his thick head
that he bad been fooled he was the mad
dest beast in all Africa, but it was too
late for action.
We had come prepared for just such a
job as we now had on hand. The monster
must be got aboard the barge, but we
were in no hurry to begin. We got our
ropes and chains ashore, drove stout
stakes where they would be wanted, and
moved the barge to the lower end of the
bluff. By this time it was dark, and we
tied the old fellow’s hind legs together
anil left him. It wasamightyuncom
fortable position for him, but we counted
on that to aid us next duy. He was
and he kept us awake with his yells and
*qiiil«i( yf(i fpwpl Ukj.ku but (?t the lions kiag all
of
beasts had simply come there out of
sssra.asar&'s m
to attack a rhinoedros alive nor attempt
to make a meat of him if he was dead.
After breakfast next hobbled' mornine we be
gan work. We first our pris
oner, and than hoisted km oftfeof the
pt Tho fim thing lie did was to m ako
a J rnsh, but it was;failure
purchase tackles him and led them got
op
away to trees and staples, and by their
means wc chocked him up or warped
him along as wewilled. AiTwehad to
was noon tojHPftatau&y we h»a si ;ej irns. the
barge, one ^alf had o •wb up
to him, W6 tu J
without inflicting Hamburg an injury.
landed in withont a e of
at thirty yenre when captured, and he
was considered good for fifty or sixty
years longer. captured rhinoceros
We had one so
easily that we exacted to secure another
in Therefore, a day or two by th§ surprise tame means,
day find great the was our entirely deserted next
to swamp
by the animals. AU the signs went to
show thfttat was a rich feeding ground,
and that k| least twenty of tnefellbws
had been battling about, but they had
taken th* a’anh and made off. The
and tacit proved to lie the case. We
took go*!?care qufet Of the one we had secured
and kept aa S3 possible, and on the
afternoon surprise. of the' 1 of eighth flay wa got a
Home us were asleep and
some lollingabwut, when * black rhinoc
eros, who had skulked up to the edge
of the swamp and surveyed us for how
long no one 'qpujd, say, the uttered his
He “woof:” and charged hundred center camo.
was within a feet of the ab
balls when the alarm was given, and he
struck it just as I turned out. It had
stopped through thaotlnw Hit'th is crash,’holding fellow went
it with a great
straight tef my tAat. ,
We ran right and left to'give the charg
ing monster a cleaf Srid, but he had his
eve on that tent aloue, He struck and
knocked it fat. The edge of the bluff
was only six feet away, and before he
could cheek Mmieff he Went over. He
could swim, of «o»rse, bat he would
have plenty to think of, and every man
of us, acting on flhe SMhe impulse, seized «i
a rope or some thcaati other object to make the his
capture. and All their splashing es leaped and shouting into
water,
so confused the hisiegs blast that they got the
ropes around w&re and steered him
down to a spot he 1 could land,
The rest of us were lead v for h ; m, and
before he could figure out what was go
ing on we bad him tight and fast, and
before dark he had* bSen hauled into the
barge. other, He was not es large nor as old
as the but nevertheless, a valuable
creature, and we lost-no time in getting
the pair down to a ,point whence they
Could started for seacoast .—Hew
York Sun.
Intensive gardening.
Man naturally Wants the earth, or at
least that particHlaf part of it which
makes j a great^mistsfifca extensive when he engages
n Prince farming KrftnotkibB. on ap wlio scaie. has mude
fl
t?y districts srtSd'Paris, whSe com
J f two’ and sevenWhs acres which
fSK.rr&'TcLrs
the walls to secure ail possible radiated
p„d oc ,i» 0 cot^Uon Irom ibe mol
.January to the last of December. By
simple and inexpensive means he has
[ ,. rft cticAllv 7 located his farm in the
r0 pics
A French gardener does not care what
kind o{ so il he shirts with. He would
because heml^Ms soifaud
uLcVfrom'bebg^rafilly rl'ise’dlbo^e
SSSHS® ssrjLXXtes 1 ,te
-
p Tmce K mpotklne speaas of one gar
Jlfed by a sm^l boUer nnZ ?bU’rouifd
sheltered by this covering. Tlirc-ult
has been that he has cut everv dav for
ten months from 1000 to iSOO large
bu “ che8 » f a8 P a ragus, p product which
under ordinary conditions would reouire
sixty acres of land. But this result has
been surpassed by an i nglish fa which mer,
who has a one acre mushroom farm
yields him an annual income of $5000.
Under the French method of culture it
would be possible to make one square
mile support 10t»0 human beings. On
such a scale of productive capacity this
country would support a population of
3,000,000,000. Even when we knock
off a fair nereentafre unffvorable for mistakes exa<r It
derations and conditions,
turies to come._ Picayune.
Bible Scenes Still Enacted.
In writing from Fayal, one of the
Azores Islands, a correspondent of the
Boston Transript says: • ‘On the couu
try roads and near the wind mills you
will see circular threshing floors made of
hardened pumice stone. When gows
and oxen are driven over the grain,
crossing and recrossing it, these are a
distinct and frequent feature in the
landscape, and reminds one of Bible
scenes. ‘What is that strange noise
I hear from afar?’ I say to my native
companion. ‘Why, it is an load ox cart
coming along the lane with a of
grain.’ I watch and wait and within
half an hour it passes, with its two or
three yoke of oxen dragging this un¬
couth cart with sides, its high encircling solid
■wicker front and its gthat
wooden wheels creak and groan. One
is impelled to be merciful and beseech
the owner to oil his wheels. But no, I
must not, and am told that this noise is
a part of the equipage, and no farmer is
satisfied unless his wheels have the
proper amount of squeak. A law was
once made by the 1’ortuguesc Govern¬
ment that no creaking cart should be
allowed to enter a city, -but the people
rebelled and the law was repealed.”
Counting a Bushel of Clover Seed.
It is not to be supposed the seeds in that any one
has ever counted a bushel of
clover or common grass seed, for such
an immense amouut of labor is entirely
unnecessary for the purpose of obtain¬
ing the number of seeds, or at least very
near it. The object in counting the
seed is to obtain the average number, for
every ounce and pound will vary slight¬
ly, but not sufficient to materially affect
the result. Suppose we take a quarter
of an ounce of seed and when Jhe num¬
ber is ascertained we multiply it by four,
which gives the number in onc ounce,
and by multiplying this by sixteen we
ascertaiu the number in a pound. By
multiplying pound the number number of of seeds in a
bushel by the the pounds in a
we arrive at total without
difficulty. Some of the will grass seeds are
so light grains, that an but ounce contain a half
millioa common timothy has
only about 7-1,000. Bed clover will
average 16.000 seed per ounce, and white
clover double this number, or 32,000.—
New York Bun.
The New England of mackerel feet landed last
year 40,769 barrels as against
78.478 in 1887. 80,315 in 1886, and
880,033 in 1885.
_____
The official report of the crop of pole.
XiTm StRt?s ■ ° r
000 bushels WwIMpVv. •. . rf. *
. . . .
X. BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SKKTCH’.S FROM
VARIOUS SOURCES.
Bright Golden Prospects — Ven¬
omous—In the Soup—The Pit
fall of Mmrfc.e! ing—Bloed
JFiU Tell, Ete, * " Etc.
„ >
Golden is the weddmg-bell,
. Golden is the rich r,ng;
Golden is the maiden’s hair:
- Golden smiles the morning fair.
And another little thing
Golden makes the future’s hue—;
He has gold enough for two!
VenomoM. v
Va^jrtn^g? wi»^‘‘ yo^u^TtoSsu^ WOn,t Ml “
Miss “iL“ViS^ Van C (aside,—•“ ‘Used to likei’
m 8
tb ®. SOUP ;.
'
“What’s the matter? louloox , sur
prised," said and the pretty girt in pink rib
boned cap apron at tue “Barar.”
“Well, I’m used do to cold ..oup and no
oysters, but I object to having it so
cold that it doesn't kill the beast. Every
time I throw in a cmcker, that ovster
you dropped in by mistake jumps up and
swallows it”
_
The The Piff.il Pitfall «r of Marketing.
Toung Housekeeper ffo butcher)—
“You may send me semedueks, I think,
to-day.” Butcher—“Yea’m,
pose(” canvas-back, I sup
nothing 1 oung about Housekeeper ducks;-—“Well—er—no, (who knows
I guess pot; they might be tough. Send
just plain _ ducks without the canvas
backs.”— Epodi.
Blood Will Tell
Lady (as a blood-curdling war-whoop
is beard from the kitchen;—-“What is
happening, Maid—“That Walters?” Dinah
is She always
yells that wav, ma’am, when she suc¬
ceeds in turning the omelette without
letting it drop on the noor. She’s the
daughter of a /.ulu Chief.”— Time.
From Bad to Worse.
fehe-“I < T would ut Uke , to call „ you v by your
Christian name, love, but Tom is so
hateful and common.you know. Haven't
you some pet names” ,
He “N-no, I er haven t. ’
*-he ’ Are you alwajts known as Tom
among your friends?”
call He (brightening up)—“No, ^ the boys
me ‘thorty ” ”— Life.
Popular Preaching.
First Preacher—“How do you manage
to succeed so well among the cowboys
out West?”
Second Preacher—“There were six
hundred present at my first.sermon and
I said: 'Gentlemen, I’m going to tell
yod about a man, five feet high, who
floored a giant eleven feet high.’ Then
I. spoke of Goliath and David/’
!.™ elU V
“When I finished * • v . they . gave three
cheers for David.”— Time.
A Rather Small Practice.
Yountr Doctor “Ves T pTrierf fhnt
it will go pretty slow when I , rst open
an office until 1 get started a little.”
Old Loctor— “Well, you bet it will.
Why, when I first hung out my shingle
I sat in my office for. three mouths, aud
only had one case.”
1 oung Doctor—“Whew! That was
pretty tough, wasn’t it? One one case;
and what was that a case of?”
Old Doctor—“A case of instruments.”
• ««.<*. w „s , 6 . x»oot
An old man would not believe he
could hear his wife talk a distance of
five miles by telephone. His better half
was in a shop several miles away where
there was a telephone, and the skeptic
was also in a place where there was a
similar instrument, and on be ng told
how to operate it he walked boldly up
aud shouted:
“Helio, Sarah!’
At that instant lightning struck the
telephone wire and knocked the man
down, and as he scrambled to his feet
he excitedly cried: “That’s Sarah, every
inch!”
A Debtor's Logic.
“Could you manage to pav me what
you owe me?” asked one traveling raan
to another
“Yes, I might, but you may as well
wait for it.”
“I like your coolness.”
off “My dear fellow, you are really better
as it is. You don’t doubt th;£t I am
going to pay you this money, dp you?”
“ Not the slightest ”
And if 1 were to give ft it to you now, I
would only borrow aga n.”
“That'smore than likely.”
“And the next time I borrowed it
might not pay at all. So you see, you
are safer as it is.____
A Man ol Many Names.
White One of House the “general reception public” named at the
was
Decker, and as he approached the Fresi
dent, he told Colonel Wilson, who .in
troduced the visitors, that his name was
such an easy one that it could not be
mistaken.
said “Happy President. to meet you, Mr. Cracker,”
the
said “Happy Cleveland. to meet you, Mr. Baker,”
Mrs.
“Mr. Saeker,” murmured Miss Bay¬
ard, doubtfully.
“Happy to meet you, Mr. Black,”
said Mrs. Whitney, confidently.
And thus Mrs. Fairchild wished him
a “Happy New ear, -Mr. Brown,” and
Mr. Decker est aped aud looked at one of
his cards to see what his name was, any
way.— Washington Tost.
Rapid Transit. In YTashinston.
If I were search ng for a simile for
slowness more expressive than those of
the snail and molas-es, I should use the
Washington vehicle of street transporta¬ right !
tion. Not long since I was on a
cav line, and could have ridden where I
wanted to go fer five cents, ,b«U war in
a hurry and teiliim took a the cab, for of which I paid ^
fifty cents, mac my anx ety j
to saie time. Araujr times I called to’
JjjtKStBSST ifiSlfteS
peration I used unusually strong lau-j
«: a r- rrsjri , f -vlrijl ft
SnbseripflM; $1.25 1 b Mtiml
D «* hj be eould sot
‘•Becawtfc.’ti be sa d, calmly, “thecar’a
w He the,way.” foHoWiflg the
^ m track just be¬
. hind that tine veh.e which 1 had
e re
jee'ed as slow.— Phitaddphia Telegraph.
Eminent _ . Avoiding SfateVmau the (walking Public.
up tore
porter;—(“Jfy face is familiar to you, I
presume.”
Reporter—“I have certainly seen you
somewhere, and yet I cannot exact
ly—”
EraitMfnt Stateamar.—“There is no use
_ i trying to keep anything from the
Q
watchful eye of a reporter. You recog
nize me, .of course, as Congressman
:’ .. T -
Stf!” the »°” jeit of your visit our
1hrmi ? h bfre » n a ” uiet way, and as far
«^eavoidingpubl , 1 city.”-C/^
Overheard.
lr •*“** . . I»n1ngtqn . (jmt before the
re¬
ceptrooi—“But who is this timon Mil
le L,?^ n “ :e
Minnie . Oh. he lives all a.one, in
Uule across the street, and
be s an awfmly dry. comxal thing. He
(she stops with a short gasp as Si
mpn .Miller enters under guidance of an
usher,—“Goodness.’ do yon suppose he
heard mcP’i*he exchanges r. ia3t con
vuU ive giggle with her friend, and then
advances with a look of supernatural
solemnity on her face;,
Her mother (entering with Mr. Stokes,
the newspaper man;—“This is a pleas
ure, Mr. Miller; allow me to present Mr.
Stokes, our literary gentleman: I hope
you will like each other; he will prob
ably put us all into pr nt; prepare to give
an account of yourself.” t
JliSIer ,in grim tones;—“My name is
Simon Miller” I lire all alone, in that
little house across the street, and I’m an
awfully dry, comical thing.”— Yankee
dilaile.
-
“Constant Header” in the Sanctum,
“Good morning, Mr. Editor. I see
you are very busy, but I suppose a cat
can look upon a king without distnrb
*** *
Certainly ”
“Don’t let me take anv of your valu
able time, but I seat you a communica
tion the other day which vou haven’t
printed.”
“Sign “No, I your didn’t name?”
ft, but the care to put mv name to
matter was one of such pub
lie interest that i-”
“Wrote on both sides of the paper?”
“Why, ves. I didn’t intend to, but
the sub ect strung out so I had to, and
also round the margins.”.
“Wrote. *-ohnsou’ so it looked like
‘Smith7”
“Signed “ ery likely. I was in great haste.”
‘Constant Reader,’ I sup
pose”’ sir,
“Yes, I have read your valuable
paper for a great many years.”
“l ead ail our editoria.3 on the sub
ject you wrote about?” *
“ o. Have yod been discussing that
subject?
“ erta ulv, for some months past, off
and '
on ” '
“Singular I haven’t not ced it. Well,
you can’t print my communication,
*' d « ^ai% as I may make some
1 (7h.,cV«i
i.<o. ..U*. w« ‘ ”
’
, h»etpt hnt T
t he floor 15 httered wlA manu -
.‘r e , ,
U‘' mo m ®. tblD o °° room f° . r r ' Tast ®
, ^hlr^ome^hp?™ 0 ^ 6 *
th ® “ ol that comes here.
aS ^ ,, 1
: i «»a hi„ r
M Elevator. i? n I ‘ lr,n i „ s Iar ‘ ner U P
climb stairs. ^
What kind of a looking man?
.St™** f °° a <lay wlth a big club ‘
‘
Day. —Spnngfield - , , Lnxon. .
His Nap Cost a Sweetheart.
Beene 1—A Chicago railway station.
Time—5 a.
A young lady, wearing, among other
seated an engagement window ring, is discovered that
at a car of a train is
apparently on the point of moving out.
A oung lady looks anxiously out of win
dow, as if momentarily expecting some
onc ,' Trai "; after » delay of two hours
a i,. a ^alf, finally pulls out. last
glimpse ot young lady snows her with
handkerchief to her eyes, seemingly in a
paroxysm of grief..
&cene 2—Sleeping apartment of young
ma “> ^ ddca f’°'
J U imc oung man sa is . me aroused * from heavy
slumber by the sound of an. alarm-clock
at 5 rabs M : 3°” b Dg man and , ya T“ S WoMfr
0U ’ , N’ * eyes mutters:
‘ B >‘ ; J ? ve ; there tbat dasb tb ’ n S?°f
°, cl ° ck ' and , 1 P ro “ uad . Mabel
1 y t0 See ber od ^ ad but 113
‘ ’
p u jj 5 t jj e q,j an ^ e t s more closely about
„.‘ It caa t b « helped now , however.
™ T J“‘ P atcb U P a llttie he and makti lt
al J' 1 S bt f
-
Tl ‘ rus °J er ftnd sl f Pf tdi f ,ne . 0 ,, clock ,
*
T Letter No. I (the little lie):
“Deakfs r Mabel —I have not the language
at Stiy command adequate in to to express off. my
grief on failing to lie time see you
“But the fact is. my darling, my work
. he;
kept me up very late the night ore, and
when I waked the'next morning was horrified
to see that it lacked but a few minutes of
five; and though I throwing drgssed with myself all into possible
dispatch, literally enabled my
clothes, I was to reach the station
onlv in time to catch a glimpse of the rapid
receding train—the train that carried all that
was mest dear to me in this world, etc,
“Your own Harry.”
Letter No. 2.
“Mr. Harry Blank: Sir—The train you
of did not leave the station until 7:80
“inclosed you will find engagement ring,
I return to yon forever.
“Mabel Redhead.”
— Ckicetqo Times.
■
c an
opinion on against ihe i anaina the feasibility Canal.nine out of
ten are of the
and this was the case at the verv
beginning,
American wagons have the market in
tion of China and Japan.
■THEY SLANT IN THAT DIRECTION
* i *"
■
L
To Ml w’y men is so an’ so
Is much too hard for me,
It is the way the critters grow, vr
TSst makes them what they be;
I only say She reason Wy
So many men Is all awry.
An’ frtf of imperfection,
Is simply jest because they can’t
Gitany*other kind of slant—
They slant in thet direction.
Ido not try to make it plain
W’y men are proud or meek;
Or with a mighty sweep er brain,
. Or vast expanse er cheek;
It is enough fer me to know
It is the way the critters grow
In every town an’ section; *
7 here is sflm power that gives a cant.
Some mighty “skid” thet makes ’em slant
All slant in thet direction.
An’ I don’t blame men overmuch
An’ on their vices rant. tf
Till I look up their traits an’ such
To fin’ the way they slant;
An’ I won't smite ’em hip and jT
Until I find the wav they p’int,
Nor scold each imperfection;
A little cberity Til grant,
For men are bad because they slant—
They slant in thet direction.
—S. W. Foss, in Yankee Blade.
PITH AND POINT.
Done brown—Sealskin sacques.
Good for insomnia—Chloroform.
Hard to beat—The, head I ess drum.
“Whatever is is right.” This cannot be
said of the left hand.
The Bilence that speaks—The conver¬
sation Letween two deaf mutes.
A match between two dentists in their
art would probably result in a draw.
He is a rare man who cannot a >ord to
well do as he would be well done by.
There is always a rise in provisions
when the dumb waiter is sent aloft with
its load.
The expression, “Oh, you be hanged,”
is entirely out of place now. In fuiure,
“Oh, you be struck by lightning,” will
be the proper exclamation.—Ana York
Awe*.
“What made you tell me a lie,
Johnny ?” angnly inquired Mrs Brown.
‘‘Because,” pica led hi de Johnny, “I
*»ew you w°u.a aek me if I told you
the truth.’— lime.
Tough hat did Luck—First Stage Fobber— Jerry?”
“M you git ytsteiday,
Second Kobner—'’Nothin’, there wa-n’t
nobody in the stsge ce tin’ a lawyer,
two plumbers and a prima donna, an’a
professional courte-y wouldn't allow me
to touch’em, of course .”—Terre Haute
hipre t.
Elsie—“What was the real reason,
dear, for breaking your engagement
with Sir. Fmv the.” Eva—“Well, you
-ee, we were at the . oo, and when I
thre-vacake to the lion mv brace et
slipped off with it, and the horr d oeaat
refused to go in to the cage and get it.
The lioness has it now.”— lime.
Curious “Teething” Customs.
, . It would ... be . stake, . . „ ncob., ,.
a m (ays
. t0 beueve ,bitt we !ire more medueval
than other nations. The measure^ for
rei ei ing ti.e dangers fi om We Cr. el at
^pb^t'^t^Uby^prow h«w maternal bettM^.ua and
anything else the impressed
professional!', muds hu-.e been •
awe-stricken fa,th down to the sec
oLd half of ihe nineteen.h century. Ac
eordmg to H. H.Ploss, in different ports
of Germanv, Austria, and Switzerland
they resort to the following measures: old is
The tooth of a colt a twelvemonth
worn around the neck at the time of the
SrSffSj.’S*
round the neck, the baby to be licked by
dogs. The head of a mouse is used as
the paw of a mo e. Every female visitor
gives the baby a hard-boiled egg. The
baby is carried to the butcher, who
touches the gums “ with fresh calf s blood.
The gums e touched wU h the tooth of
a wolf or with the claw of a crab. The
baby is supplied with three morsels from
the first meal in the new residence after
the wedding; bread from the wedding
feast of a newly married coupie in good
repute; a mass of lind sprouts cut at
twelve o’clock on Good Friday. A bone
found by accident under the straw mat¬
tress. -Mother, when first going to
church after confinement, kneels on right is
knee first. .A man coming to visit
silently given a coin, touches the gums
of the i aby three these times, and—goes cul¬ to
the tavern.” All customs in
tured Germany, in the nineteenth cen
;ury !—The Hospital.
An Oyster Trnst.
A new industry has been established
at City Island, which is the centre of
the oyster trade for places on Long
Island'Sound. A trust has been formed
by some (JTfhe dealers on the island,and
they have opened an establishment
where the oysters are and opened other and shipped
to Buffalo, Chicago association points employs in
the interior. -The
from thirty to fifty men. who have never
before had steady employment in thousand winter,
aud send away more than tiftj
oysters a day.' The men work by the
piece and earn from $3.50 to $5.50, per
day. They are paid and $1 per 1000 few for
opening days oysters, opened ;000 one in man day. a The
ago one
oysters'are pail. put up The in eight-gallon ha- pails,
l ilOO to a association ex¬
hausted nearly all the City Island crop
for the season, and will now make a de¬
mand on Norwalk, which is the great
oyster ground of Connecticut.— Neu>
York Commercial Adretr, iser,
A Safe That Defies Burglars,
It is a saying of the police that a loclr
is no sooner inveuted than a burglar
finds a way to open it. 'I he safe makers,
however, have at last built a strong box
which defies the crack man’s effort. It
consists of nn arrangement in the casing
of the safe of a lot of steel balls, which
ire loosely arranged so They that a 'drill around, can¬
not be used on them. turn
and era if a drill would pieice one it
would only fall and let another ball into
its place. An Eastern burglar has de¬
vised an electric machine to make an en¬
trance into safes. but the device is so
clumsy that d can never become a popu¬
lar ieature of the “kit.” i£ -£8f. Louis Alar
Pittsburgh hes twentv-one National
B “ k * n 11* 'lip