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VOL: 3.
CfiORIA COURIER.
F. A. DUmT^Proprietorsl
JL. If. SHEttMA N—Editor.
F. A. DUVAL-Associate.
_ ■ t.’ i ‘-- q
TERMS s
Two Dollars per annum, (strictly tn ad
rsace,) or|3 00, If tV
. To club* MtniUing $lO in advance , Six Copies will
db sent one year • . A .
4 , Any aabscriber failing to give notice of his desire lo
his subscription at the expiration of the time
for whieh It has been paid, will be considered as wishing
to continue it, and held liable accordingly.
No paper discontinued until all arrearages are paid, ex-
RATES OF AVB(tTjß|^Gt
One Dollar per square for the first Insertion, and Fifty
cents for each subsequent insertion. A square is twelve
lines, or less. Advertisements handeA-ln without having
the number of insertions specified, will be published until
forbidden.
Liberal contracts made with those who advertise by the
quarter or year.
Leftl advertisements inserted at the usual rates.
Sales of land and negroes by E.xecutots, Administrators ;
and Guardians are required by law to be advertised forty j
days previous to the day of sale; and the sales must be held i
at the door of the Court-House in the county in which the
property is situated between 10 o'clock a. m. and 3 j>. m.
on the first Tuesday in the month-
Sales of personal property and notice to debtors and cred
itors of an estate must be advertised forty days: notice that
application will be made to the Court of Ordinary for leave
to sell land and negroes, must be published two months .
Sheriff 1 * sale*, under executions must be advertised thirty
digs; *ncer mortgage executions, sixty,days.
Citations for Letters of Administrator’s sale must be pub
lished thirty days; for Dismission from Administration
monthly six months; for Dismission from Guardianship forty
days.
Applications for foreclosure of Mortgages must be pub
lished monthly six months; for establishing lost papers week
ly threo months.
on business to ensure attention, must be post
paid.
PROFESSIONAL CARDS.
~tv ij'7l s '~r-,“ ~ rTtrr ■’ ■ “ =
Professional and ucln£Ss ‘i‘fn can have their cards in
aerted under this head, for one year, at the rates of $5 for
a card of not more than six lines, and seventy-five cents
for each additional line.
LAW & CONNELLY,
Attorneys at JLaiq,
Albany, Oa.
Will practice in the South-Western Circuit,
and in the Counties of Macon, Dooly and Worth
of the Macon Circuit.
■ EtIRT M LAW WILLIAM C. COtISELLY
January 18, 1855 If
, ISTotiCO.
THE undersigned will give prompt attention
to all business entrusted to his carp in the
counties of Sumter, Clay, Randolph, Marly, De
catur/ Biker, Caihonii, Dougherty nod “in
this Circuit. JOHN LYON,
Solicitoi General, S. W. C.
Newton, March 18,1851 —ly
H. \V. pfc.VlttllAN -*■ . KI >1 It ROUGH.
ATTORNEYS AT LAW.
STARKVILLE GEORGIA.
. February 4,1854. —1 y
HENRY C. ALEXANDER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
Albany, Dougherty County, Georgia.
WILL give prompt attention to all business
entrusted to bis care.
Office up stairs, over J. C. Davis’ Store.
Albany, January 28, 1834—1 y
STROZIEII &SLAIIGIITEK
Attorneys at Law,’
Albany, oloroia;
YATTLt practice in the South-Western Cir
** cuit. llarirtg opened offices both at Alba
ny and Newton, they may be consulted at the
fatter place during the first and third weeks of
each month of the present year.
Albany, Jan. 7, 1854. s—ly.
warren: <v warren.
ATTORNEYS AT TAW,
ALBANY, GEORGIA. .
WILL practice in the following Counties:--
* “ Sumter, Raker, Early, Thomas, Lee, Ran
dolph, Decatur and Lowndes.
t.OTT WARREN, * ‘ 1 ‘ * L. P. D. WARREN,
tune 17, 1853—1 y
K. J. WARREN,
ATTORNEY AT LA W,
, . Starkville, Georgia.
July 1,1853 —1 y
HENRY MOROAN,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
. -, , Albany, Georgia.
TIT’ILU practice in-tfie Courts of the Sotijii-
Western and Southern Circuits.
Office up stairs* in the old Franklip Hall; nest
Aoor to the‘Georgia Courier.
June 17, 1853—if
THOMAS C. SPICER,
Attorney at Law,
ALBANY, GEORGIA.
July 23, 1853—1 y
WILLIAM E. SMITH,
Attorney at Law,
ALBANY, GEORGIA.
WILL attend to professional business in the
Superior Courts of Sumter, Lee, Randolph,
Baker, Early, Decatur and Lowndes; and in the
Inferior Courts of Baker and Lee counties.
ALSO, in the several Courts of Ordinary of
Baker county.
.. Office, up stairs, one door West of J. C. Davis’
Store. Oct 8,1853—ts
THOMAS J. I)l\\
A TTORNE Y AT LA fV •
Jasper, Calhoun county, Gla.
“YAfIEL attend to professional business in the
” Superior Courts of Sumter, Randolph, Ear
ly, Clay, Decatur, Baker, Calhoun, Dougherty
and Lee counties.—May 6, 1851—ly.
MEDICAL.
TNRS. JENNINGS &LUNDAY having formed
a co-partnership, tender their professional
•erviees to the citizens of Albany and vicinity.
February 10, 1851. 10—ly.
£l)c (Georgia Courier.
axpagißtro -
TDe Cricket.
The cricket he dwells in the cold, cold ground,-
At the root o{ the old ok tree,
Alid all through the lengthened autumn night
A mefry song tings he.
He whistles a clear and merry tune
By the sober light of the silver moon.
The winds may moan
With tjjpllotvtone
All through of the rustling tree;
ThtfSfudsjrury fly
• Ttirojfih ‘{he Jeep blue sky, *
The flowers-'ih^d the brooklet sigh,
t But neveal&g cares he.
All through.tne ienjjUiened autumn night,
And never a fig cares he. . ;
There’s a tiny cricket within thy hea<t,
And a pleasant sqpir sings lie:
He sings of the rafifeies and good ness of (3cd
That hourly falJGpon thee: . .-
Let him whi.-tie Icud and clear, i>
Never drown him tear; -
There’s darkness Mough oneifffh, I trowi
Without the gloci#ol e gloomy brow ;
Darkness enough | the home of the poor
That never coineyo thy lofty door.
Forth wBLa smile,
Thejr wfifto beguile^
Forth to figbicn tl#flieavy gloom, *
Forth to bright#. clouded home;
Cheer up the soultbftt is shrouded in night,
Tell it in tonesof love,
Os hope on earth, arid a land all bright—
The land of Lilt and Love.
And never fret,
That yot cannot get
Just what you wait while you travel here ;
This is nut your listing spiiete ;
Trials, vexations,
•Are but temptations;
Use them aright, aid they’ll help you along
lo the narrow road
Thatjeaes to God.
Use them aright, aud they’ll help you along.
Never frit,
You’ll cuiqiier yet.
Then let him whistle loud and clear,
Never drown him in a tear-;
But all through the length of trouble’s night,
Let him sing his merry song.
The Tri-weekly Selma (Ala.,) Reporter has
picked up the following doleful dftiy :
“ l*oor Old Maids.”
Three score and ten of us,
Poor old maids!
Three score and ten of us,
Not a soul to give a buss ;
What uill becomeot us?
Poor old maids!
Long time we’ve tar-ri ed,
Soon shall we be bu-ri ed,
Oti ! tr.iH r.o were n..;r ti edl
Poor old maids !
Dress’d in yellow, pink and blue,
Poor old maids!
Dress’d in yellow, pink and blue,
With tacos of a chalken hue,
Is there more that we can do,?
Poor old maids !
A'l alone >we go to bod,
Poor old maids!
All alone we go to bod,
Put our night caps on our heads,
liut not a word lo us is said—
Poor old maids!
p-— ——————
Awful flxMmioii.—lu Metre.
‘iTlie engine groaned,
The wheels did creak,
The steam did whistle,
And the boiler did leak;
The boiler was examined,
Tltey found it was rusted,
And all of a sudden
The old thing busted !
A Model Dim.
An Editor “out west” thus talks to his non
paying subscribers and patrons ! If his appeal
does not bring the “pewter,” we think he need
never try agiin:
“Friends, Patrons, Subscribers and Ad
vertisers-: —Hear us for our debts, and get
ready that you may pay; trust us, wa are in
need, and have regard for cur need, for you have
been long trusted ; acknowledge your indebted
ness, and dive into your pockets, that you may
promptly fork over. If Iberp be any among you
one single patron that don’t owe us something
then to him we say—step aside ; consider your
self a gentleman. If the rest wish to know why
we dun them, this.is our answer: Not that we
care about cash ourselves, but our creditors do.
Woul 1 you rather that we go to jail, and
fPee'tiftn you pay your debt-, and we all keep
‘moving ? As we agreed we have Worked for yo->,’
as wd contracted we have furnished our paper to
you; as we promised, we have waited upon
you, but as you don’t pay, we dun you ! Here
are agreements for job work ; contracts for sub
scription ; promises for long credits ; aaid duns
for deferred payment. Who is there so mean
that he don’t take a paper ? If any, he seedn’t
to speak—we don’t mean him. Who is there so
green that he don’t advertise ? If any, let him
slide—he aint the chap either. Who is there so
bad that he don’t pay the printer ? ff any, let
him shout—for he’s the man we’re after. His
name is Legion, and he’s been owing us for one,
two, three, four, five, six, seven and eight years ;
long'enough to make us poor, and himself rich
at our expense. If the above appeal to his con
science does not awake him to a sense of justice,
we shall have to try the law and see what virtue
there is in writs and constables.
•The Rehersal. —The furious and blind on
slaught of the Johnson press in Georgia upon the
Know Nothings, forcibly reminds us of Long
street’s “Lincoln Rehersal.” After exhausting
himself with blows and oaths, bites and cuffs,
kicks and gouges, upon an imaginary foe, the
heroof that ludicrous scene, in reply to the Judge’s
remonstrance against his pugnacious conduct,
cooly remarked-—“ You needn’t kick before you’re
spurr’d ; there an’t nobody there, nor liasn’l been
nuther, 1 was just seein’ tiowr I could a fout.”
Wc greatly enjoy these valiant rehearsals.—
Let them be coutinucd by all means.—Southern
Recorder.
Albany, dougherty county, Georgia, april s, jsss.
Ffom the Detroit Daily Advertiser.
Doesticks in Love.
New York, Jan. 29, 1855. —Previous to last
Wednesday nrgli*, I had never been in love.—
Save an occasional fit of cholera morbus, I had
never experienced any tiling even remotely ap’
proaching the tender passion, Put on the eve-,
ning of the eventful Wednesday. Sandie
invited me to go with Tihn and see his sister.—
Now my friend Sandie is not a scholarly person,
and has never received that questionable blessing,
a college education. He always says “codfish”
instead of “bouaflde,” and palls “tempus fugit”
“pork and beans;’’ the only ‘ Jupiter” he knows
iMjwWe^e-itleman; and his onlv idea of “Venus’’
is a'colortu WSsnerwoman, who in early life got
up his hebdumadel linen. But his sister is emi
nently classic; she stoops fashionably, with the
“Grecian” bend—has a Roman nose, and her
name is Calantlie Maria. I went to see that
sister—l saw that sister—l “ caved.” That
seraphic sister—to attempt a description of her
would lie insanity itself. I will only
mention her hair, and when I have said that this
was sublime, and divine, I wish it distinctly un
derstood that I use these feeble terms, because
the poverty of our language does not afford ad
jectives of adequate force.
The instance.! saw her my presence of mind
deseyted me. 1 felt bashful—l was conscious
that 1 looked like a fool in the face, and my ap
parel. (on which I had prided myself,) seemed us
unworthy to be seen in Iter presence,as if it had
been bought second-handed in Chatham street.
Beneath the glance of Iter brilliant eyes, my feet
seemed to grow too short, and my legs too long
—my coat too big and my collar limpsy. I dis
covered a grease spql on my vest, and seemed lo
become mysteriously conscious of a hole in my
pantaloons. Never had I been so shamefaced
in the feminine presence before,and my bashlul
ncss only temporarily deserted me, When, after
much tribulation, I achieved a seat on a clumsy
looking foot stool, which I understood was called
an Whether it had any connection
with Turk, turkies and Turksgiving, I failed to
discover.
Left alone a short time, I had leisure to recov
er n-yself, and to bote the individual charms of
my f lir enslaver. A partial inventory or her vis
ible apptfrel, is inefficeably stamped upon my
mine, A silk dress, of a pattern which seemed
to hwe been designed for a. gigantic checker
friurq, made with a train to do scavenger duly,
and sleeves with lace curtains underneath
—lieftneck and shoul Jers hidden from view by a
thiu t-i-Ai.f lace, of a putijffi outgo
edly made to attract attention—beneatli which
couid he seen , hut particulars are omitted.
Suffice it to say that she was dressed as the pre
vailing fashion seems lo demand. 1 essayed to
speak to iter, but my timidity returned upon me
with double force, while turning over her music
—praised every tiling in the wrong place, and
when site sung a false note I exclaimed, “deli
cious.” She made a two-handed discord, which
I pronounced “enchanting,” and when at last,
from excess of agitation she broke flit down, I
enthusiastically declared tint 1 was “never morel
delighted in the whole course of my life.” Asked
her to play a waltz, and handed her a choir-book
- opened at “Corinth” and “Silver Street”—|
found I was wrong, and turned over the leaf to
“Sinners turn, why will ye die?”—discovered
that all was not right yet, and then requested her
to play some sacred music, and in anxiety to get
the right notes this time, placed before her the
“Jenny Lind Polka,” which she at once began to
play—l attempting to sing the words of “Old
Hundred,” which didn’t seem to jibe.
We tried to dance, but my confusion still con
tinued—l “chassey’d” myself across a (able, and
into a music rack—“promenaded” my partner
over the stove—“balanced” her into a sideboard,
and eventually attempted to seat her iti a mirror
where I saw a sofa.
Then I essayed conversation, and I am confi
dent I talked the most absurd nonsense for the
rest of my call—distinctly remember speaking of
Noah Webster’s beautiful play of “Evangeline”
—eulogizing Shakspear’s “Robinson CrOsoe”—
Thackeray’s generalship at Waterloo—attempt
ing’ to explain the difficulties which attended
Henry Ward Beecher’s attempts to get his opera
of “Bohemian Gir!,” before the public—telling
who had the blackest eye when President Pierce
and Joan of Arc fought their celebrated prize fight
in the Crystal Palace in New York, in 1793
and at fast, breaking down in trying lo explain
why Admiral Elihu liurritl, and his right hand
man Xerxes the Great, did in taking
Sebastopol in a month, according to contract.
When 1 bade her “good night,” she took my
hand and set me crazy by the touch of her fairy
taper fingers—dreamed all night about “Calan
the”—got up in the morning, called I lie waiter
“Calanlhe,” and said “my darling” lo him, as he
handed me my coffee—gave my tailor an-order
fur anew coat and two pairs of pantaloons, and
told him to charge them lo “Calanthe”—got a
box of cigars and a demijohn of Spanish whiskey,
and signed the drayman’s receipt “Calanthe”—
all the signs read “Calanthe”—every street was
“Calanthe” street—all the stages belonged to
the “Calanthe” line, and were going to “Calan
the” ferry—the ship “Calanthe” had arrived—the
steamboat “Calanthe” had bursfher boiler—the
brig “Calanthe” had teen seen bottom upwards,
with her rudeer gone. I saw, heard, dreamed,
thought and talked nothing but “Calanthe,” and
cannibal that I am, I verily believe I ate nothing
but “Calanthe” for a month.
The day after I saw her first I felt so exceed
ingly amiable, that I bought something of every
peddler who came into the store—laid in a stock
of matches, pencils, shoe brushes, suspenders,
boot jacks, and blacking, which will last me a
short life-time—bought so much candy that the
office boy had the colic every afternoon for a
week—and called tho opple woman “my own
jyeet love ;” and said “thank you, darling,” when
nte gave me pewter dimes in chr.ngc.
\Yrote spasmodic poetry about “Calanlhe’s’’
pair—a sonnet to her glossy hair—lines to her
raven, tresses—stanzas to her locks of jet—rhymes
so her black hair, and commenced a poem in sev
enteen cantos, lo her ebony topped head, but on
reflection I was led to doubt the propriety of the
comparison. I called to see her every evening
victuals didn’t agree with me—a
v-ind word from her was a good breakfast—a ten
ter glance has served me for a dinner many a
ime, and when she pressed my hand I couldn’t
‘at any tiling for a fortnight but crargee, cream
Ep-:dy,atid Wg wxl'4 to tlwrtltfl-,
wire, endured the negro minstrels, and braved the
liorrors of a second rate Italian Opera Company
t —in fact, everywhere, where there was anything
In be seen, or there were Culanthe Maria
nd tier devoted P/iilander. , .
For a month I forgot my debts, neglected busi
iess, ignored entirely this mundane sphere, and
ived in a rainbow colored serial castle, of the
lost elegant finish—surrounded bv roses, attend
d by Cupids, and big enough for Calantlie Ma
:a, and the subscriber. Iti that happy place
here was ro dans, no tailor’s bills, no debts, no
Citing up early cold mornings, no tight boots,
o bad segars; nothing but love, luxury and Ca-
Unthe Maria. I came down occasionally out of
l iy sir mansion, to speak a few words of compas
sjioii to my companions in the office, who hadn’t
got any Calantlie, but went right back again as
quick as I could to that rose colored dreamland
where love and Calantlie were “boss and all
hands.”
At last, one fatal evening I was undeceived,
y/ewere waltzing, and through some clumsiness
ott ntv part, her hair caught in a gas fixture, some
mysterious string broke, and those glossy ring
letts, the object of my adoration, ‘came off,’ leav
ing Iter headtts bald as a brickbat.
Relating this scrape of the locks to a friend, he
informed me that the rest of iter charms would
not bear minute inspection, for she wore false
teeth’, and bought Iter complexion at Phalon’s;
and that her graceful form was the result of a sin
fW combination of cotton and whalebone. This
was too much. While 1 thought Calantlie a
woman I loved her, but discovery of the ‘fisliey’ el
ement excited a prejudice—as a ‘female,’ she had
my-affections, and I contemplated matrimony
as a land mermaid, 1 had no desire to swindle
Bdrnum and become her proprietor.
Coming as I did from a section of the country
where they have human women,'and witerc they
*tteinptjp deceive masculine mankind with
Prefcch milliner’s strategy, I was unprepared for
o ounterfeits, and had been easily deluded- by a
spurious article. But I find that in New Y’ork,
perambulating bundles of dry goods net unfre
iqiently pass current as women—and the millin-
I ?rs now put their eccentric inventions upon these
locomotive shams, to the great neglect of those
revolving waxen ladies v/ho used to perform their
perpetual gyrations in the show windows. As
an advertising. medium they possess facilities for
publicity, bey end any of the newspapers, having
a city circulation, which is unattainable by any
thing dumb and unpetticoated. The great staple
of the Soutli lias not only ‘made’ some of our first
men, but has been discovered to enter largely into
‘die composition of many of our ladies.
My madness was now over—the speil was bro
ken—the blind fiend was exorcised- reason got
back to her old bunk, and “Richard was himself
“pain.”
Yours, convalescent and thankful,
Q. K. Philander Doesticks, P. B. •
Mr. Stun tor Seward and Secret So
eiet ies.
I In his place in the Senate of the United States,
(not long ago, Wm. 11. Seward, of New York,
(took occasion, while virulently deriding the new
(American movement, to declare that he had nev
er belonged to any society but the Christian
fclureh and the Whig parly ; and especially re
pudiated the idea of having belonged to any se
cet organization. Til's statement, the N. York
Express assevera'es,he knew to be untrue when
h> uttered it, and we, says the Express, know it
l< be untrue. When Governor of the State, he
oficiated as the presiding officer of.a secret organ
isation. He initiated members into the signs and
s/mbols of a secret order. He administered ob
ligations and pledges to secrecy, lie had pre
viously gone through the same forms and cere
nfonials himself, and then led others into, the’body
of Yhich he was a most prominent member. So
s|ys the Express.
And yet, Mr. Seward, in the Senate, Seward
men in the Legislature, including the whole body
o: pledge breakers there, and the State paper,
which knows of all these inferior secret organi
zations, have *he effrontery to denounce secret
societies. The motive is a cheat, the act a fraud,
tnd the anticipated res.ult a private advantage
trough such instruments of duplicity as we have
iere recorded.
J. P.. Lowell, at the close of a recent lecture
on Milton, said :
The noise of those old warfares is hushed ; the
sing of Cavalier and the fierce psalm of Puritan
are silent now ; the hands of his episcopal adver
saries no longer hold pen or crozier; they and
their works are dust; but he who loved truth
more lhan life, who was faithful to the other
world while tie did his work in this ; his seat is
i.i that great cathedral whose far echoing aisles
are the Ages, whispering with the blessed feet
of the saints, marirys, and confissors of every
clime and every creed ; whose bells sound only
cenlutial hours; about whoso spire, crowned
with the constellation of the crons, meaner birds
than missioned angels haver ; whoso organic mu
sic is the various stops of endless changes breath
ed through by endless good ; whose choristers
are elect spirits of all time, that sing serene and
shining as morning stars, the ever renewed mys
tery of Creativo Power.
A Movement among tlic Big Fish.
All the world, including “the rest of mankind,”
have been famous for parly organizations, secret
conclaves or public, demonstrations, whenever a
great crisis was at hand, or 6ome petty end was
to be achieved by unitv of action. This amono
n j
the men, (and some women, also,) lint whoever
heard of the “inhabitants of the sea” taking up’
the custom, and in general convention making
known tlie hardships which they are heirs to ?
From the following account, which we find in
the March Number of the Knickerbocker, it
that such a meeting lias really been held,
and from the tone of the orincipal spea rs, we
infer thaf the h@e-settlers of the Nftrlh, are not
only Suckers whose “ constitutional rights,”
have been invaded ; nor, (if there are as good
fiali in the sea as out of it,) the black fish ol.the
South are not the only ones entitled to the sym
pathies of the fin-atic.
As we find the account in no other journal, the
conclusion is legitimate that the Knickerbocker
received it by the Submarine telegraph, a rather
scaly mode of communication, to be’ sure; hut
nevertheless as reliable as many o'hers, and vve
give the documents accordingly :—Col. Enquirer.
All the big fish and 9maU fry lately met in
convention, to take into consideration the con
duct of the ocean, and also of mankind in getter
at. The Whale was ex-officio President, and
from his greatness might be termed the Prince of
Whales. He opened the convention by stating
that he did not wish to make a speech; he would
take up as little room and he no longer than pos
sible., The Shark whispered to the sword fish
that it was riot possible for the Whale to be much
longer, for he was eighty feet now ; in his opin
ion lie only wanted a chance to spout, and he con
sidered him a regular blower. The Whale con
tinued that, notwithstanding his great size, (he
might add tears,), he was not exempt from suffer
ing. lie had been grossly insulted by man ; lie
would say lampooned ; not that lie would pun up
on the use made of his lat, as be did not wish.to
make light of such a matter. He had been har
pooned at least. Some of his fellow whales had
been very much cut up, and exceedingly tried
lie had lately learned that a substitute for oil
had been invented, which might lessen the pros
ecution of whales; but Ire feared it was all gas.
The Whale alluded to a harpoon which had
lately hit him ;it had made a great impression
on him, and he feared had affected him deeply.
Here Iris feelings overpowered him, and lie sat
down (on the Shark,) amid a general blubber.
The Shark rose with some difficulty, and re
■ marked that tin toil df ‘.hi Whale !..■! Vioved
him ;in fact it was very spiking. His own sit
uation was far from pleasant. lie was by p-oles
! sion a lawyer, and he flattered himself one of the
I deep kind ; but business was.bad, and he had
I been obliged to take in a few pupils. He had
I lately presented a fine opening for a young man
who fell overboard, but was afterwards obliged to
reject his suit as indigestible. Unless he had
more cases, he should leave the law, and open as
a dentist, as he was well acquainted with the art
of setting teetii. lie then held up one flu, as a
signal that he had finished. s .
The Sea Serpent did not r. ish to intrude upon
the convention, as he did not know whether lie
properly belonged to the fish tribe or j not, and he
would not appear officious. All he wgs
not to be classed with the Eel, vvlioni he consid
ered a slippery character. J.ately, ltd was quiet
ly passing a certain species of the eel| when hap
pening to touch him, lie win so shocked thafhe
had hardly recovered. The eel rosejand said he
was electrified at these remarks. . It was evident
to him that the serpent was more than halfseas
over, and if lie was not careful, would get him
self into a regular coil. As for his being a “slip
pery character,” he thanked Neptune he uid’nt
belong to such a scaly set as the Serpent. The
Whale called the E -1 tn order, and the Eel call
ed the Whale,a confounded swell-head, and was
then put out of the convention.
The Turtle was suffering from a slight indis.,
posit ion. He was we Iking ashore, a short time
since, when he met a party of jolly sailors.
result was that he was laid flat on his back, and
was unable to move for some lime, and since he
has no* felt as lively as usual. There was one
thing to which lie would call the attention of the
convention, lie prided himself upon the purity of
his political principles ;he was the A'derman’s
best Mend. The Shark had Ir-iely insuhed him
by calling him “regular hard-slieii.” Here the
Shark interrupted him, by asking if that was not
his case ! ffhe-Turtie replied that he should say
nothing more at present, but should have some
thing to lay before the convention. The Shark,
contemptuously, “Yes, a few eggs, probably.”
The Porpoise did not exac'ty understand the
purpose of Uie convention, nor whether all the
members were present. The Secretary should
call the ,-o!!. The Whale called him to erder,
and was sorrv to see him reeling about, in that
disgraceful condition. His motion was entirely
out of order, and he appeared to be getting up a
revolution. The Porpoise assured the conven
tion that his motion proceeded entirely, from the
motion of the waves, but still he would wave his
motion.
The President remarked that he should he hap
py to hear from some of the small lry,thp Oyster,
Lobster, and others, who, if not the“bono and
sinsw”ofthe tribe, were at least Muscles. The
Oyster proceeded to open his case, which was a
hard one. He was continually in trouble, and
always in some stew or broil. He had family
troubles alsohis half brother the Clam was a
disgrace to the family, always in liquor, and gen
erally considered a “ squirt.” Some of his fam
ily were very lazy, and spent most of their time
in their beds. There had also been some rakes
among them, creating a great disturbance. Ho
was most respectable himvelf, his father was quite
distinguished, and his maternal ancester was
“Mother-of-Pearl,’’ lie went in for bis rights>
and did not care w •. er they got theirs or not.
The Jew-Fish remarked that“dat vosh very sel
fish.” The Oyster continued ; there was one of
his neighbors—he would not call any names—
who was very surly and crabbed ; that he was a
one-sided individual, and no one approved of his
motion. The crab protested against this abase,
and said the rest took advantage of him because
he was “soft ”
Here the Cod Fisli entered, and apologized for
his lateness, as he had been to visit a school. He
thought the W hale was badly off, since men took
his oil to-make lights of. His own case was the
- reverse of this; they took his lights, (and liver
too, fpr that matter,) to make oil of. This might
be very good lo>-consumption,, but H was con
fourded bad for him. The most alarming kind
he ever heard of was the consumption of cod-fish.
It might be very good fun for men to cut him
open aud salt him down, but to hang him up af
terwards, was rather too dry a joke. The Her
ring said there had been a disposition manifested
to play tricks of this kind in iiis school, and that
lately some of his companions had been badly
smoked.
The Shad, too, in his spring migrations up the
rivers, had been greatly persecuted, particularly
by the members of the Legislature. Men had
greatly nettled him, and had nearly driven him
insane. .lie was not a superstitious fish, but a
most unlucky day to him was fry-day. Howev
er, be thought his enemies had suffered some
what in the wan-.e, and,had found his tail a
regular bonypart. (Tl;e Flat-fish was not par
ticularly flattering in reply to the Shad; for he
did not believe that there was a shafow oftruth
in his remarks.)
The Salmon, had liis troubles. He was an
aristocrat, not.of the cod ti.-h kind either, and did
not associate with the small-fry. He spent
most of his time in travel, and, in summer, went
up inland rivers, and took his family to the
n 2 s Falls. lie had been lately much
afflicted and grossly maltreated at the South.
Passing up the Savannah River, his family had
been surrottnded by a party of infamous kidnap
pers, and some of his children had been “hooked.”
It was his intention to inform Uncles Torn and
Sam of this oufrage, and the Union would be
dissolved immediately. Here there was a regulaf
row ampng the small-fry. The Trout called
the Salmon a Northern fish, with Northern prin
ciples, who had no business poking iiis qose up
Southern rivers. lie considered the ctory of
the Salmon all gammon, and got up for political
ele ct. lie was a small fish himself, but any in
sult to hjs native stream he would not brook.
The fly- g fish flew into a tremendous passion,
and appealed to the Black-fi-di if he w3 not as
well trealod as any, white bait. The Black fi >h
‘hanked Neptune that, though liis back was
black, his belly was white. Just then there was
a great disturbance, also, among sundry* others
of the small-fry, who had evidently been drinking.
There was a l of suckers who were very much
inebriated ;and one small fish sung out at the top
of his gills, that he was “a folly cld Sole ;” and
amid the general row,.there was such a din and
noise that Felix and I coucluded that it
was (lie ship’s dinner gong, as indeed it w4s.
Canting a “Devil oat of Church.
We are indebted to our friend, J. M. Eilis, of.
Ohio, for the following graphic sketch. W’e are
assured that the facts transpired substantially as
narrated :
“ A Methodist clergyman who lias been labor
ing in this vicinity, was nqt long since, preaching
to his people on the miraculous power the
Apostles over the demoniac spirits of their day.
As he was pursuing his theme, the audience
were suddenly startled by a voice from someone.
in the congregation, demanding in a half querrel
ous half authoritative tone. Why don’t preach
ers do such things now-a-days? .In an. instant
every eye in the.house was turned upon the in
dividual who had the effrontery thus to invade the
sacredness of their sanctuary. The speaker
pi used for a moment, and fixed his penetrating
gaze full upon the face of the questioner. Thera
was an interval of inten-e silence broken at last
by the speaker in resuming his subject. He had
not proceeded far with hi* remarks, before he
was again interrupted by the same impertinent
inquiry. Again lie paused for a time, aud again
resumed his subject. Not content with a silent
rebuke, our redoubtable questioner demanded
again‘Why don’t the preachers do such things
.tio\vm*duyS, and curling hi- lips with a’ sneer ot
j seif-complaceney, drew himself up pompously iu
; his seat. i, r . ~
“ Our reverend friend, ‘who by the way, is a
young man of great muscular power,) calmly
left the desk, and walked deliberately to the pew>
where the interrogator sat, and fastening one
, hand firmly upon the collar of his coat, the other
on the waistband of his unmentionables, lifted
him square out of his seat, and bore him down
the aiste to the entrance. Pausing for a memetit
there, lie turned his eyes upon his audieuce,and
in a clear full voice said, “and they cast out the
devil in the form of a distiller,” and suiting the
action to the word, out went the knight of tho
mash tub, ala leap frog fashion ’ntc the street.
“ The good pastor quietly returned to the desk,
and completed his discourse. After closing die
services, as he was passing out of the church,
the out-cast distiller, with an officer of the law,
escorted pur clerical friend to the office of a mag
istrate, to answer for an assault upon the person
of said distiller. After hearing the case the mag
istrate dismissed the clergyman, and after round
ly reprimanding the complainant, fined him for
molesting the services of the sanctnary. ,
“ Since that day we believe ho has never for a
momeni doubted the power of Methodist preach
es to cast out devils, at least within tne limits nf
the Ohio Conference.
Up jumped our ‘Devil’ in a rage,
And set two lines to till this page.
NO. 18.
