Newspaper Page Text
November 17, 1909. THE
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Story Corner
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INCOMPETENT.
"Father," asked the small boy of an
editor, "is Jupiter inhabited?" "1 don't
know, my son," was the truthful answer.
Presently he was interrupted again.
"Father, are there any sea serpents?"
I don't know, my son." The little fellow
was manifestly cast down, but presently
rallied and again approached the
great source of information. "Father,
what does the North Pole look like?"
Hut, alas! again the answer, "I don't
know, my son." At last, in desperation,
he inquired, with withering emphasis:
"Father, how did you get to be an editor?"?Zion's
Herald.
WHEN WOMEN VOTE.
District Visitor: "Good morning. Mrs.
I'erkins. I hope you are coming to the
i nionist Association garden party at Sir
Archibald's this afternoon, to hear our
(andidate speak?"
Mrs. Perkins: "Well, no; you see,
Mum, my neighbor, Mrs. 'Opkins, she belongs
to that, so I joined the Liberal Government,
so we can look arter one another's
babies while Pother's at meetings."?Punch.
A pretty school teacher, noticing one
of her little charges idle, said, sharply:
lohn, the devil always finds something
tor idle hands to do. Come up here and
let me give you some work."
"Pa!" said the little Pennsylvania boy.
"Well?"
"Is the moon made of green cheese?"
"Not if the contract called for green
cheese, son. But run along, Little boys
mustn't monkey with politics."?Exchange.
First Milliner: You have designed the
North Pole hat? Second Milliner: Yes; it
will be a matter of dispute between the
purchaser and her husband.?New York
Sun.
"How do you pronounce s-t-i-n-g-y?"
'he teacher asked the young gentleman
nearest the foot of the class. And the
S'| a:t boy stood up and said it depended
:I M'eat deal whether the word applied to
" man or a bee.?London News.
"if you dare to kiss me again, I will
<:>U papa!"
"I thought you said your father was in
California?"
"He is."
Mrs. Hix: "I don't take any stock in
hese faith cures, brought about by the
laying on of hands."
Mrs. Dix: "Well, 1 do; I cured my Utile
boy of the cigarette habit that wav "
,.T^? Inward Effect* of humora are worse than
ii 9,utw*fd- They endanger the whole system.
, h09" " Sarsaparilla eradicates ail bum rs, cuiesall
" >r inward aod outward effects. It is the (rest
and tonic, whose meiit has been every*
here established.
PRESBYTERIAN OF THE SOUTH
r=ri i i-=-i i ifs
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We speak (
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oiu uays?tr
graces and c<
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that they di<
Une
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The Soda Crack
light of this day
NATIONAL BISC
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50 Lesson Business
Hp Teacher,:
the science of accounts
Arranged for Public School Busine
School. 25 Lessons for Graded Schoo
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A booklet containing 12 spec! me
Addref
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Southwestern Presfa
CLARKSVILLE,
Thirty-Fifth Session 0|
Literary, Scientific, Divinity Courses.
Graduates prominent in the South. Excel
No saloons. Expenses moderate.
(1776) Hampden Sit
Able Faculty. Select student body. 1
ble moral and intellectual tone. Extensi\
leading to degrees B. A., B. S., B. Lit., N
modern conveniences.
One hundred and thirty fourth sessic
For catalogue or other information a<
REV. HENRY TUCKER GRAHAI
*
t. 27
K"J. Tfricfc I ?
m
-w
of the good
le charming
ourtly ways,
we forget
d not know
eda
suit
er that is the deand
generation.
UIT COMPANY
. I
Course, Without a
for $1.00
MADE CLEAR AND SIMPLE. H
88 Course. 50 Lessons for High H
1. Endorsed by Business Men and s
entirely satisfactory. n
in lessons, sent free if applied for.
}8 ||
EORGE ALLEN, Raleigh, N. C.
yteri&n University
TENNESSEE.
jcns aepiemoer lain.
Students nearly all church members.
Ilent athletic record. Healthful location.
WILLIAM DINWIDDIE, Chancellor.
Iney College (1909)
High standards and thorough work. Notare
Campus and Athletic Field. Courses
[. A. Steam heat, light, baths and other
tn begins September 15, 1909.
ddress,
A, President. Hampton-Sidney, Va