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Thursday, Novbmbbr 18, aoio | The Rbp a Black
OmM BwMtt | Editor in Chief editor@randb.oom
Cam VIM | Managing Editor me@randh.com
Cwrtwy Hannah | Opinions Editor opinions@randb.com
Working holiday
retail is not fun
I’m tom.
The anticipation of
next week’s feast
stuffing! turkey! pie!
(whipped topping!) is
tempered by the
onslaught that will inevi
tably follow.
And my thankfulness at
having a steady part-time
job is offset by the abso
lute madness that job
for the next two months of
the year will require:
People, people every
where! And nowhere room
to breathe!
The holidays are com
ing ... and lately I find
myself more than tom.
I’m terrified.
No, I tell myself, come
on: don’t be melodramatic.
Working retail isn’t that
bad.
I could be— shudder
a fry cook.
(Been there. Done that.
Burned the T-shirt.)
Really, anyway, what’s
to hate?
I wear a blue-black uni
form, smile at anything
with a pulse, make small
talk with old women ...
and work overtime, des
perately, tq staunch the
flow of give-it-to-me-now
craziness that descends,
fog-like, as the festive sea
son closes in.
I’m no stranger to
clothes tossed carelessly
on the floor or clinging
to a hanger or shelf or
eight-foot-tall metal rod.
Things happen.
Giant piles of shoes,
built like squirrel nests
from leather and pleather
and metal clips, no longer
faze me.
Once, someone called
and asked, “Who are you?”
And I resisted the urge
to snap back, “My shrink
and I are still figuring that
out.”
I’ve been well trained; it
just rolls off my back.
The holidays, though...
the holidays may finally do
me in.
Walking up and down
soundbite
fOirl on campus: “I have to pee ... I need to drain
my dragon” confused much?
fl go to the fourth floor of the MLC because I want
peace and quiet. Not because I want to hear you and
you friends talking and laughing as loudly as
possible.
f Talking about your trip to France in class does
not make up for the fact that you haven’t done the
reading and you don’t know how to read French
literature.
fSGA senators should go ahead and work for the
Israeli government. They obviously know more
about Israel than they know about this campus.
fThe next time you complain about smokers in an
easily avoidable smoking area, I will blow smoke
directly in your face.
fWhy do people talk on their phones in public rest
rooms? I don’t want to hear your conversation with
your mom while you’re peeing.
f Homeless lady, why do I see you everywhere? I
think you’re following me.
<<|) I hope the Campus Library gets a Wii next.
Why does it only rain on the days I forget an
umbrella?
f Maybe you two shouldn’t hang out anymore I
can't handle the drunk dials at 3 a.m.
Regardless of what SGA says. I’m taking a pro-
Thanksgiving stance.
fHey, guy who took up both seats on the full bus
because he wanted to put his feet on one of them, I
hope you get a nasty case of athlete's foot.
fib pedestrians crossing between East Campus
and the art school— there is a crosswalk. Use it, or
I’ll hit you and laugh.
fßy the way, you’re both too young (and imma
ture) to have children.
?Why did the guy in my horticulture class bother
bringing in that nasty blueberry yogurt slime? There
were 300 people and it wasn’t touched.
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the aisles of this depart
ment or that one, I already
sense the anticipation, the
agitation: the energy.
Everyone's gearing up
to shop ’til they drop.
And now, when I close
my eyes, I can picture
what they’ll leave behind:
Not clothes hanging
anywhere, but punted
across the store, into ceil
ing tiles and small chil
dren.
Not nest-size piles of
shoes, but avalanches
devouring the weak and
the elderly and the slow.
And customers asking
crazy questions politely?
No longer. They’ll tear and
jostle and push —a mad
dening crowd crazed for
discounts.
I’ve gotta work Black
Friday it gets to you.
Just remember as
you’re volleying store to
store across the pre-
Christmas retail land
scape:
It may not be your job
to be particularly consci
entious in your shopping
travels.
But it is someone's job
—some associate nobody
working whenever-to-close
—and one day you made
need their kidney or liver
or heart, or that extra seat
on the bus or a spare
quarter.
Karma, hmm?
Besides, if you’re not so
spiritually-inclined, let me
be more blunt:
We aren’t monkeys.
And this ain’t no zoo.
Adam Carlson is a
sophomore from Hiram
majoring in magazines
and film studies and is
a variety writer for
The Red & Black
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Opinions
|L |/the one written ft>rachjlTw
Youth vote can save Social Security
I wake up on the 15th and the
last day of every month in a
good mood.
Why? Because that’s when I
bring home the bacon.
However, I can only count on
that good mood to last until I get
to work, receive my pay stub and
find out how much Social Security
has stolen from my check.
Needless to say, it’s always a
Debbie Downer.
Every year; I pour around SSOO
into the Social Security
Administration to ensure my
grandparents get their monthly
benefits.
That may not sound like much.
But to a broke college student like
me, SSOO is about a month’s worth
of living expenses.
Now, I wouldn’t have a problem
handing over the hinds if I thought
I would ever get a return on it.
But if Social Security continues
down its unsustainable track, when
I turn 65 in 2054,1 won't see a dime,
according to the White House
Office of Management and Budget.
For years, politicians have
pledged to fix Social Security.
After all, it’s an easy fix. If
Congress raises the retirement age
two or three years, the Social
Security Trust Rind will be main
tained well into the future, accord
ing to the Congressional Budget
Office.
But none of them have done it.
Republicans and Democrats alike
Never trust bartenders under 21 years old
I’m a staunch believer
in the adage “never
trust a skinny chef.”
So how can I trust a
sober bartender?
Should 18- to 20-year
olds be able serve some
thing they can’t even
taste?
We Americans have
argued forever, it seems,
on how old we should be
before we can drink alco
hol.
One side argues to
keep the age limit at 21
because anyone younger
is not capable of handling
this stuff.
Others say no, the age
limit should be dropped
to 18, arguing, among
other things, that anyone
old enough to pick up a
rifle in defense of our
country is old enough to
pick up a bottle of booze.
Idiotically, we let 18- to
20-year-olds work in res
taurants and bars, mixing
drinks, carding patrons
and passing out alcohol.
Aside from the obvious
contradiction in all this, I
don’t want to eat a soup
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Katie
that a chef hasn’t tasted,
and I really don’t want to
drink a cocktail the bar
tender has never tried.
How are 18-year-olds
supposed to know the dif
ference between vodka
and rum, Budweiser and
Heineken, chardonnay
and pinot noir when they
have never have tasted
any of them?
Forget asking for drink
suggestions. These inno
cent, under-age bartend
ers wouldn't be able to
teU me the less-than-sub
tle differences separating
a mimosa from a Bloody
Mary.
What if they decide to
get imaginative and
spruce up my lemon drop
with a dash of pepper?
How are they sup
posed to know how that
is going to taste?
Sure, they can follow a
Our Staff
Jeremy
‘ra D/uley
have remained silent.
Their avoidance of the issue
boils down to Social Security really
being a domestic war between the
young and the old.
And as it stands now, we’re los
ing.
Why?
Because our representatives
think we don’t care.
And rightfully so.
Politicians are known to be sin
gle-minded seekers of reelection.
Therefore, they are naturally going
to lobby for constituents who will
support them when election season
comes around.
Approximately 68 percent of the
elderly population vote.
It’s a good year if voter turnout
for those ages 18 to 24 reaches 40
percent, according to the U.S.
Census Bureau.
So who do you think politicians
are going to back?
Not only do we not vote, but it’s
also rare when we join the political
discussion.
In the year I interned for
Congressman Paul Broun, I spoke
with elderly constituents on a daily
basis.
recipe and assume their
knack for measuring and
combining ingredients
will hold up behind the
bar as it does in chemis
try lab.
But forget them get
ting creative with drinks.
A chef who cannot
team by trial and error
and put a personal spin
on a classic dish is hardly
a chef at all.
What if there is some
thing wrong with the
bar’s weU tequila?
A bartender who can
not taste what the cus
tomers are complaining
about might And himself
in quite the sticky situa
tion.
I will rest at ease when
someone of drinking age
is behind the bar whip
ping up original, non-poi
sonous and tasty if it’s
not too much to ask
cocktails.
We are denying these
bartenders the right to be
inventive with their craft.
When a chef tastes a
soup before he serves it,
he is putting his creative
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Phone (706) 438-3002 | Rut (706) 488-8038
oplnions@randb.com | www.redandblack.com
540 Baxter Street, Athena, Oa. 30605
I can count the number of young
people that contacted us on one
hand.
And that is no exaggeration.
The solution to the Social
Security dilemma is simple.
But until we provide the motiva
tion, this issue will remain in a
standstill.
Don’t wait until the next elec
tion.
Raise your voice and contact
your representatives now.
I’ve already told Congressman
Broun I want it fixed or I want out.
Senator Johnny Isakson said in
his forum last week that he wants
to leave this country better off than
he found it for his nine grandchil
dren.
Let him know you and his grand
kids deserve their Social Security
or you deserve your money back.
And most Importantly, keep
them accountable.
How do you do that? Vote.
If the elderly can get out of their
rocking chairs, put in their den
tures and drive to the polls, then
there is no reason why we can’t do
the same.
Just think of it as a wrestling
match. If it was you versus your
grandmother, who would win?
I hope, for your sake, the answer
is obvious.
Jeremy Dailey is a senior
from Conyers majoring
in political science
talents on the line.
Innovative recipes are
sure to foUow.
By denying young bar
tenders the ability to
sample their “soup," we
are not permitting them
to be inventive.
Indeed, with these
restrictions on age we are
making it impossible for
bartenders under 21 to
excel at their job.
How do we alleviate
this great injustice inflict
ed upon 18 to 20-year-old
bartenders?
Well, we have two
options.
Send them back to
their chemistry lab until
they mature Into wise
21-year-olds who have the
ability to taste their own
creations, or return to the
good ole days when
18-year-olds could drink.
Why not the latter?
It worked out nicely
for my parents.
Katie Lcuzara U a
senior from Suwanee
majoring in publication
management
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