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RELIGION
The Amazing Adventures
by Zelda Zorch
ATLANTA BARB-Page 11
Of Super Fag
Stop Hiding
BY Rev. Troy Perry.
Holy Week, traditionally,
in the Christian community
is a time when most people
stop to remember that
almost two thousand years
ago a man called Jesus
shared a last meal with His
friends, was tried for
crimes He was not guilty of,
and sentenced to death. He
died, but on the third day
after His death He arose
from the grave victorious,
alive!
The Scriptures tell us
that “early in the morning
certain women came to the
tomb. The stone was rolled
Ask The Doctor
Q. Are homosexuals born,
or do they just develop that
way?
A. I feel that homosex
uals are not born this way,
but because of externa! fac
tors, become homosexuals.
Q. Are Homosexuals real
ly more neurotic than the
average heterosexual?
* A. I would say that homo
sexuals are probably not
anymore .neurotic' than the
general population.
Q. Are hermaphrodites
really freaks of nature?
A. While there is a very
small percentage of people
born hermaphrodites, a
very smail percentage of’
them are homosexuals. So
practically speaking, her
maphrodites are not
“Freaks of nature.”
Please send all questions
to: Ask the Doctor c/o
AtlantaBarb F.O., Box
82543 Atlanta, Ga. 30354.
Start Living
away. They entered and met
an angel who said, “He is
not here, He is risen.”
It is possible in 1974 to
have yet another resurrec
tion. It is time for we who
are Gay to help roll the
stone of ignorance and pre
judice away from the
cavern which holds Truth
in bondage so that it might
“spring forth as the noon
day sun with Justice and
Equality.”
No more will we watch
as Brothers and Sisters are
placed in institutions when
the only crime is loving.
We no more will watch as
children are taken away
from their mothers, be
cause their mothers happen
to be Lesbians. Police br
utality and harrassment
must stop! Entrapment
must end!
It is time to stop hiding
and start living!
During this month as we
celebrate Holy Week and
Spiritual Renewal this new
Resurrection of Truth will
start! Join us!
As you remember dear
readers in the last episode
of Super Fag, our hero
hq^l just heard the siren
signal of the Silver Phal
lic Whistle, the call for help
from his sometime sister
fighter for the Forces of
Gaydom, Wonder Lez. We
join Super Fag now in one
of his Amazing Adventures
“The Big Jockstrap Con
spiracy.”
Volume I, Episode 2,
Part l-“The Big Jock-'
strap Conspiracy!”
Harkening to the siren
sound of the Silver Phal
lic Whistle, the call for help
from his sometime sister
Fearless Fighter For
Gaydom, Wonder Lez, Su
per Fag flips open the top
of his rhinestone cocktail
ring, and notqs on the hid
den direction finder, a min
iature cock' the precise
location from where the
call is emunating. He rush
es to Brooklyn’s Prospect
Park. It is not difficult
for the Heroic Hummer
to spot Wonder Lez. He
knows her unique disguise.
Her costume consists of
long red woolen knitted
tights and a flat metal
breatplate inscribed with:
“Sappho Says, Up Yours,
Buster!” In addition to this,
she wears heavy patent
leather combat boots, and
a long fur-edged, flesh col
ored leather cloak, which
as she now has it wrapped
about her, affords her the
striking disguise of a huge
throbbing pussy, in the
shaddow of a large tree.
Super Fag knows that
this is something big! It
isn’t very often that Won
der Lez discards her day
time image of a sometime
transvetite executive in a
doughnut factory and part-
time truck driver.
Boldly steping up to the
disguise Dauntless Bull-
dagger, Super Fag ex-
laims: “Okay, sweetie, you
gonna stand around throb
bing all night, or are we
gonna get down to business
From out of the fur ed
ged, throbbing mass, a
solid fist slams into his
nose causing him to fall
over backwards. “Lady,
Please!!!” he shouts as he
dexterously dodges a sud
den kick.
“Who you calling a F---
lady?” the Laudable Les
bian mutters murderously
as she throws back her
leather clock.
“Wait! It’s me-Super
Fag!” The Heroic Hummer
shouts to her.
“Well, if it ain’t the
Brilliant B.J. Artist her
self! How many times do
I have to tell you to use
the password!” The Daun
tless Dyke says as she
helps' Super Fag to his
feet.
“Oh, yes, stud clit,
I’m so absent minded. Suck
a Nose!” exclaims the
Fearless Fag.
“That’s better,” says
Wonder Lez, lighting up a
large black cigar and spit
ting once to the side. “All
right,” she continues, “we
got big trouble to clear
up. Our ceaselessly, in*
iquitousi; enemy, Dr. Big-
otley Gayhater, is at work
again! ’ ’
‘ ‘ Gayhater! ’ ’ sputters
the Fearless Fighter, half
chocking on the Laudable
Lesbian ’s cigar smoke,
“Great balls of flesh!
What’s up then?”
“He’s in the process of
cornering the jockstrap
market with the Navy, and
if he succeeds he’ll make
a fortune which he’ll use
to further his endless, in
sidious oppression of
downtrodden gays!” ex
plains the Prestigious Puss.
“But what can we do?”
the Angered Warrior of
Gaydom asks, momentar
ily stunned by the outrag
eous news.
“My girl friend, Hairy
Hotlips, succeeded in find
ing out that his whole plan
is based on the success
ful tryout of his model
order of jockstraps on the
USS Bloomer snatcher, ’ ’
explains Wonder Lez. “The
crew of that ship is to
test the Insidious Gayhat-
er’s model, and if they
like them, Gayhater gets
the Navy’s order.”
“I see!” ponders Super
Fag, “Then all we have
to do is to sabotage that
shipment of j ockstraps! ”
“Right,” agrees the Dau
ntless Dyke. “But our
sabotage can’t be obvious.”
“Maybe we could sew
the straps together?” the
Heroic Hummer thinks out
loud.
“Hell no!” counters the
Laudable Lesbian. “I ain’t
no way gonna sew no man’s
jockstrap!”
“Okay, I got it!” shouts
the Fearless Fag. “Itching
power! We’ll dust the whole
shipment with some of th
Highly Concentrated Crotch
Irritant I carry in my All-
Contingency-Douche bag. A
little goes a long way! ’ ’
“Good thinking, brilliant
B.J.A.!” agrees the Daun
tless Dyke.
“Let’s go!”
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