Newspaper Page Text
n* Muffle, Journal.
A Beal Live (jountry'Pkper. 'PfffiTlshed
Everj- Weduesday Morning, by
WHITE & poSt MS.
IHMof lu«*erlpUon.
Bne copy, one year §2.69
BUSINESS CARDS.
—' Y - — ~ - :
R. W. H. NEAL,
A TTORNEY AT LA IF,
i»d soTi»i pnuc,
r THOMSON, OA.
WILL praotice in the Courts of
Mo Duffle and adjoining Counties.
99*Coxvbt a vex n o a specialty.
H. C. RONEY,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
THOMSON. OA-
W Will practice in tie 4»g*sta, North
ern and Middle Circuits. nolyl
“TSSf a HiS«irr
ATTORNEY AT LA W,
ThomMOu, Ga.
Will practice in the Superior Courts of
the Augusta, Northern and Middle Circuits,
and in the Supreme Court, and will give
attention to all cases in Bankruptcy.
Aug. 25, 1S 74. ts
Central |)otel,.
B'V
MRS. W. M. THOMAS,
AUGUSTA, GEORGIA
seplltf
(fa 1O * day at home. Agents wauled, i
|JS l h Outfit and terms free. TRUE *
CO., Augnsta, Maine.
JUDKINS & SHAW,
KEEP SUPPLIED WITH
FISH, OTfSTEBS, G&ME,
VEGETABLES, Partridges, Doves, Squir
rels. Ducks, Chickens, Butter, Cabbages.
Potatoes, Eggs NORFOLK OYB I ETCS,
ICK, etc. WOrders from the country
promptly filled. Address .
JUDKINS A SH AW,
Mclntosh Street, next to the New Tost Of
fioe. B2a§
UALLEP JA3.IEFFELDOU
Address, POOLE & HUNT,
SEND 25c. toO. r. ROWELL A CO.,
New York, for Pamphlet of 100 pages,
containing lisls of .'HHK) newspapers, and
estimates showing cost of advertising.
rimioH HOTEL,
Charleston, S. C.
G. T. ALFORD & CO.,
Bates, $3. AO per day Proprietors.
1,8. &P. C. TANTS’
Meat House,
%S££?bl£\_ Augusta Ga.
Pine CAROLINA, TENNESSE and KEN
TUCKY
BEEF,
Pork, Lamb, Veal. Mutton, Hog-head
Cheese, Sausage, Mixed, or ALL PORK, as
ordered, Corned Beef, Pork, and Tongues.
A full stock always on hand.
A CARD.
I AM frequently naked by my frienda if I
am doing a general practice, or only at
tending iuch calla as may be made in good
weather or convenient to my office.
In anawer to the above, I would say to
my former patrons and friends, that from
this date I will enter upon the active duties
ol my profession looking in part to those
who may ask my services for my reward.
Office on Main Street, in Holzendorfs
House.
May 10-ts. JAS. S. JONES. j
JULIUS H. OPENHEIM,
No, 143 Reynolds Street.
AUGUSTA, GEORGIA.,
WHOLESALE DEALER IN’
IRON, METALS, RAGS
AND ALL KINDS OF
Paper Stock, Hides, Wool,
WAX, Kto-
H2-n$
ALBERT HAPE,
Nou.Riwideut Ufutlst,
( AN still be found ready to attend to the
wants of old and new patrons, if desired, at
their residences.
Will also, as heretofore, practice in adjoin
ing comities. Panic prices insured and all
work warranted.
Office at the residence of W. E. Speir.
Please address by letter, at Thomson, Ga.
C 8 ts
Cos., Portland. Maine.
QSfcr Jjßcipttfk .Hbdfig Journal
VOL *
To the Afflicted*
I $jP —j. 1
IN CALLING THE PUBLIC ATTENTION
TO THE
Indian Compound
COUCH MIXTURE
TT'OK the cure of CONSUMPTION and
£ all disease of the LUNGS and
THROAT, t say that nothing surpasses it
for Colds and Coughs, and can be taken
! from old age down to the cradle with impu
nity,, and .without danger. .But, the proses
, sionnl world is so full of Ambignousness
[ and Egotism, that anything put before the
; public as a safe and reliable Remedy for
certain diseases is sooffed at and 'pro
nounced worthless and a humbug. I say
trrejt before you condexan it, as I will givy
yJSk-ilie name of every beds, 4c., that it is
composed of. which yon can examine at
mm;
ArbJtreS AffiSiuia ppn, ffiifra HfeKm'um,
Marrubinm Vulgate, Antennaria Symphy
tum, Duichwachsener Wasserdost, Cepha
lanthus Occideutalis, Symphytum Offici
nale
It is prepared at my office, No. 5« Peach
tree street, ATLANTA, GA., where it. can
be had in any quantity. If any one using
it will say that it has done them no good,
return the bottle and get your money re
turned. S. T. BIGGERS, M. I),,
Cls-f*. Atlanta, Ga.
For sale by Dr. A. D. Hill, 'Thomson, Ga.
Spring Time! Again!
C L
E A
N I
T N
EN
CJL9TMMWS,
BOOTS,
SHOES,
HATS.
AC., AC., AC.
JUST received a large lot of Spring and
Summer Goods of all kinds, which are use
ful, good, pretty and cheap.
Wc only aak inspection before you spend
a dollar for anything in our lino.
A. J. Adkins,
THOMSON, GA.
Tie Meof Cannon.
rphis thorough-bred TENNESSEE BULL,
X whose pedigree in well CHtabliwhefl ana
can be traced back through the purest stock
for many years, is now standing on my
plantation four miles North-east of Thom
son, near the old White Oak Campground.
He possesses all the qualities of the fiuest
blooded stock in the land, is three years
old, of dark brown color, weighs about fif
teen hundred pounds, a model form, per
fectly gentle and well disposed.
I am prepared to take care of cows sent
from a distance at reasonable rates. A
number of his calves may be seen at the
residences of Messrs. T. B- West, Wm. H.
Johnson, and others. Price of Beason
so.oo}
M. W. CURKY.
May 10-fim.
187 H. 1 877.
GEORGIA DIRECTORY.
First regular Issue now in preparation.
t. WILL CONTAIN a complete Business
Directory of every village, town and city
in the State.
2. IT WILL CONTAIN a complete SHIP
PER’S GUIDE to every poin. in the
State.
3. IT WILL CONTAIN a full, classified list
of all persons in the State engaged in
any MERCANTILE, MECHANICAL.
MANUFACTURING or PROFESSION
AL pursuit.
4. IT WILL CONTAIN a correct list of
State and County officers.
5. IT WILL CONTAIN a complete POST
OFFICE DIRECTORY of the UNITED
STATES and TERRITORIES. Also,
an accurate list of EXPRESS STATIONS
IN ALABAMA. GEORGIA, MISSISSIP
PI, SOUTH CAKOLINA and FLORI
DA, prepared expressly for this work by
Route Agents, and only to be found in
our Directories.
(!. IT WILL CONTAIN a revised and cor
rect COUNTY MAP of the STATE of
GEORGIA.
7. IT WILL CONTAIN, in addition to the
foregoing special features, so much gen
eral information that no business man
can afford to be without it. As an adver
sing medium we think it presents its own
claims, and wc confidently commend it
to the business public, hoping to receive
a patronage commensurate with its in
trinsic value, and the great pains be
stowed upon its preparation.
BATES.
One Page and Copy of Book, $25 00
Half “ “ “ “ “ 15 00
Third “ “ ** « • ..... 12 00
Fourth “ “ “ “ “ 10 00
Price of Book with Inch Card 5 00
Name in Capital Letters, 1 00
WHEELER, MARSHALL* BRUCE,
PtTBT.ISHEEB,
ATLANTA, GA.
«/• / » ( B ( M(/WNE^
GTLDBR;
LOOKING GI.ASS AND
PICTURE FRAME MAKER.
OLD FRAMES RE-GILT.
OIL PAINTINGS
CAREFULLY CLEANED,
LINED and VARNISHED.
m JACKSON STREET,
' :\ T T GT'ST A, GA.
POETI(A\.
TRUST AND BE TRUE.
Look in ynur brother's eyes, man !
And bid him read your own ;
One half the strife of human life
Is born from guile alone!
Deceit creates full half our hates,
And half our loves it slays—
Look in each others eyes, men,
And meet each others gaze!
Pardon your brother’s faults, man!
And ask that he forgive;
If human sin no mercy win,
No human soul shall live.
No need of heaven, were none forgiven.
For none could reach its doors—
Pardou your-brotlier’s faults, man,
That he may pardon yours.
Feel for your brother’s grief, man!
No heart hr safe,from woe, .
Though lip and eve may oft deny
Tb,e sorrowing weight below.
One gentle wile, one pitying smile x
May sweetest bslm impart.
Feel for your brother’s grief, man.
And you will win his heart.
Stand by your brother’s side mail,
When worthy cause he shows;
To him be just, and yield your trust,
Wien he his faith bestows.
How plainly thus with soul and eyes,
True friendship to impart—
Smile in vour brother’s face, man,
And you will win his heart.
DICK COLEMAN’S HORSE
SWAP.
A most incorrigible horse trader was
Dick Coleman. He always kept one eye
open for a chance to make a good trade;
but sometimes it happened that he came
out at the other end of the horn, in which
c.ise he losi as little time as possible in
finding some man whom he could leave
in the same predicament.
On one occasion Dick went down to
Wehoga, where there was usually gath
ered a crowd of congenial spirits, “of
whom ho was one of which,” for the
purpiso of picking up anything that
might offer itself in the way of a good
trade. Unfortunately for himself, how
ever, he suffered his brain to become so
mixed up witli reel foot whiskey that he
completely lost his usual caution, and
suffered himself most beautifuly taken
in and done for. How he got home that,
night he hud no idea—whether he rode
the beast or led him, or carried him
home on a ground slide—but it was said,
when he got out to the stable next morn
ing and found what kind of an auimal he
hod become master of, not only “cussed
a few,” but a whole heap of it.
“Plague, pestilence and famine—bat
tle, murder and sie-lden death light on
the man that put that thing on me!”
muttered he, getting his light remem
brance of Episcopal service—mixed up
with present circumstances so that it was
hard to tell whether he was praying or
“Thar’U be rest for the weary
when I git done trading with him again.”
The object of his troubles stood lean
ing against the fence on the sunny Bide
of the lot, in the most disconsolate man
ner, as though he was expecting the
buzzards to hold an inquest over him,
and he didn’t care how soon the show
opened.—Dick gazed at him with an air
of mournful interest, “and still he gazed,
and still the wonder grew,” that he
should have suffered himself so badly
beaten at that game that he considered
himself master of. He hod an indistinct
recollection that one Calvin Joluiß and
his father were trying to swap horses
with him, before his senses departed,
and he could come to no other conclu
sion than that they had pnt him in
excellent condition for walking.
“You’re a beauty, yon are 1” he apos
trophised, and then looked contempt uous
ly at the old horse.—“ You’d be quite an
ornament to a bone factory or barn yard,
but I’ll be hanged if your go. and points
off to much advantage here. Bah 1 I’m
sick 1” uud walked back to the house, and
solaced himself with a stiff toddy and
tried to dismiss the subject from his
mind. Os course there was no present
helpforit, foreven if he had known w ho it
was, he was too true a horse swapper to
go back on him. All he could do was to
wait and v atcb, in the meantime making
the best he could of his bargain, which
amounted to very little at last.
Time pissed on, and Dick not only
learned the name of his biter—Calvin
Johns —but also learned that there was
a good deal of boasting on the part of
the latter, at the manner in which he
had pulled the wool over Coleman’s eyes.
This riled Dick no Ijttle, but he held bis
peace aud laid his plans. After awhile
he fonnd a horse that suited his purposes
precisely, for the object he had in view.
He was a very good auimal to look at,
but needed everything else that goes to
make up a good horse. By dint of good
feeding and grooming, Dick soon had
him in first-rule trading order ; and, one
day, he went down to Wehoga, when he
knew there would be a crowd there, in
cluding Calvin aud his father. He was
very careful not to expo e. any of the
infirmities of his charger to the public
gaze, but stopped in a conspicuous place
and Waited the coming of his victim.
When the latter came, they met on
friendly terms, took a drink together,
and appeared to be on the most amicable
terms. During the day, Dick learned
that Calvin had a first-rate horse, rather
weak-eyed, but on the whole, a good ‘un
to go and he also observed that both
Calvin and his father paid a visit or two
J.87&-
flistened, which they seemed ta be pretty
well pletfesd with. As evening osiue on,
Dick seethed to be for taking eu a good
drunk, he and Calvin vieing with eaoh
other to see which should treat oftenest
aud driuk most. A close observer, how
ever, might have noticed that Dick was
drinking but little, and that his drunken
ness was all a sham, but Johns was too
drunk himself to notice anything of the
kiud, and was too fond of whiskey to
refuse any that was offered him.
After the drinking had been carried
on very indusiriously during most of the
afternoon, the subject of herae-swapping
was introduced, aud Dick soon found
that Johns was keen for a trade. Os
bourse he was equally anxious, and they
were not long m striking a bargain. Then
they took a drink all round, and ek
chasged saddles, and Dick prepared to
go home. While he was saddling his
new animal, Calvin’s father came up and
remarked confidentially :
“That’s a good horse, Dick, if he had
good eyes.”
“Good Lord 1” said Dick, “is his eyes
weak ?”
“Weak os branch water at the end of
a drouth !” replied Johns, who knew that
Dick would never break a trade after it
was concluded.
“Why iu the thunder didn’t you tell
me sooner ?” asked Dick, with apparent
wrath.
“I never break up a trade,” replied
the other. “Es you take good care of
him he’s all right, but es you blow him
too hard, he can’t see a fodder stack in a
month. But he'll do to trade on, as you
say, and that’s a darned sight moro'n I
can say for the other?” he -muttered, as
he started homeward. As soon as he was
out of sight of Johns, he turned iu some
thick woods, and hid himself to watch
Calvin's departure. The latter was in
high spirits, and after taking another
drink, mounted his now acquisition, re
marking :
“Well, boys, I guess I’ve about
knoeked Dick's hind sights clean off this
time. Ten dollars and a hotter boss
ain’t so bad.”
So saying, he stuck spurs to his animal
and started up the rond.—Just before
bim was a small log, and wheu the horse
reached that he struck it with all his feet
and fell about u rod, sending Calvin over
his head, aud nearly turning a somersault
on top oi him.
“Well,” said he, as soon as he could
regain his feet, “I’m blam’d es you or
me don’t have to be* made over el you
make another lunge like that. What iu
the diugnation do you mean by it, any
how ?”
“Try him on the good road, Cal.,”
suggested his father.
Cal. mounted and slowly walked him
twenty or thirty paces up the road, then
turned and started at a brisk gallop. The
horse made a few very good steps, then
got his feet tangled and spread himself
around promisoonsly, while his rider
weut off on his all-fours in a patch of
briars.
“What in thunder’s the matter with
the brute ?” inquired he, getting on his
feet and going back to liis liorse, who
was breathing like a steamboat in low
water, while his sides were thumping as
if the long roll was being sounded iu his
iuside department.
“Nothing’s the matter with him,” re
marked a bystander, “only he’s bellussed,
an’ wind-broken, an’ foundered, an, bad
ly swinnied, an’ slightly stifled.”
“It ’pears to me, Cal., ’ remarked the
old man, “that he’s gone an' got it done
to yon this load o’ poles.”
“I wouldn’t care a cuss,” said Calvin,
“es thar was arry boss factory about so’s
I could have him made over, or turned in
to a bull yearlin’, or somethin’ else that I
could find some use for.”
“There’s no use of frettin’ about it,”
said his father, “Dick’s one too many
for you, au’ you may as well lead your
colt home.”
There was no help for it' and taking
the hrible in 1 is hand, Calvin proceeded
mournfully homeward, swearing for com
pany as he went, whilst the old man
occasionally threw in a broadside by way
of variety. When they were gone, Dick
emerged from his hiding place, with a
broad grin on his face, which widened
and deepened as lie reflected on Galvin’s
oodition,- till he broke intoa loud guffaw.
“Well,” said he, “it’s better’n a circus
to see Cal.* leadin' that old sham home,
an’ lookin’ as solemn as a preacher at a
rich man’s funeral 1 Ido hope he’ll try
to bear his trials with Christian forti
tude !” and Dick langhed loud and long
at the picture.
It was the last trade he ever had the
i pportunity of making with that party,
though he laughs till yet, when he tells
about Calvin’s looks as he got up from
his ground and lofty toggle.
A single letter of Robert Burns sold
in London at auction for £29. Iu it he
says he is determined to p»osecnto poet
ry with all his vigor, as lie believes the
kna-'k and apptitude to learn the muse’s
trade is a divine gift.
Six persons in Newton county draw
pensions from the government on account
of services rendered in the war of
and two on account of injuries received
in the war with Mexico.
SwiQg the'Toothache. -
I have seen men who would jump up
and down aud call everybody liars aud
abnae their wives, aud swear au oath as
laqge as an ,o'd fashined out-door pven
amply because they had the toothache.
Watkins is one of those sort of meu. He
just gets comfortable around the stave,
with a paper iu one hand and a pan of
apples in the other, wheu whoop she
goes. It seems as if someone had fired
a bullet into his jaw, and he leaps up and
down kicks out behind aud grubs at his
face.
“Now, Watkins do be patient 1” says
his wife, as she runs after cottou aud
camphor.
He holds his mouth open and she puts
the having, soaked it with cam- '
phor. He gets a swallow of the liquid,
which goes down the wrong pipe, aud he
gives a yell aud a suort and his eyes stick
out like the wallet of a backpay Con
gressman.
“Oh ! now, Watkins, dou’t be so awful
fractious 1” i he says, in a soothing voice,
locking on the floor for the ootton.
“Fractious !” ho yells, “you could’ut
bear it a second ! It would kill fourteen
women in a minute !’’
It gets a little easier as he holds his
face to the stove, and lie a'most smiles
as he remembers the pain of a moment
ago. He is convinced that some men
would have torn the house right down,
and lie is a very patient man. Mrs.
Watkins takes up her knitting again and
proceeds to narrow the 'heel, when Wat
kins giveß another sudden yell, “Oh !
honey, 6h, my stars 1” he shouts, as he
danoes around on one foot, with his teeth
hard shut.
“Samuel, you should not take au
oath,” says the wife, in a reproving tone.
“Remember that the wicked shall not
live out half—”
“Live the old Satin 1” he roara, strik
ing his ears against the stove. “Get a
mustard plaster ; aud a bag of ashes, and
some peppermint, and some laudanum 1”
The patient Mrs. Watkins i ays that
there isn’t any mustard, or peppermint.,
or laudanum in the house, and that she
doesn’t beleive a bag of ashes would do
any good. “Don’t you remember my
brother William ?” she asks. “In the
fall of '57 he had just such a time as this
aud nothing would—”
“Shut up !” rears Wat-'ins, trying to
stuff some cotton * into the hole in his
tooth. “What do I care about your
brother Bill?”
The smarting of his ear eases the tooth
a little, and Watkins begins to hope that
it is all over. The pain dies away and a
broa l grin covers his face. Borne meu
would have routed the whole neighbor
hood and had the fire-alarm sounded,
hut he had been very patient.
“Samuel, did you see that Johny put
the white oow in the east lot; and the
black ox in the—”
“Black devils !” whoops Watkins ; as
the nerve jumps again. “Hang the
block cow, and the white lot and the
east ox, aud you, too 1 Oh my tooth 1
I shan’t live three minutes 1”
“Oh! now, Samuel!” entreats Mrs.
Watkins, trying to pat him on the back.
“Oh, hang it 1 dung I” he yells back.
“I’m an old sinner if I don’t murder
somebody 1”
About every third night, Watkins has
one of these spells. He used to send for
me until one night I suggested that he
should go to the dentist, and after the
dentist had cat around the tooth aud
jobbed a wire against the nerve and let
his forceps slip off once or twice, he
would worry the old stubb out or break
it off. My little speech went right to
his heart, and as I slid ont doors both
his boots struck the front gate.
Some Things We Never Saw,
We never yet saw a man but what
would pass off his ragged money first.
They likewise give scraps to the poor
and then give their consciences credit
for dispensing choice outs,
We never saw a little girl just learning
how to put on her stockings, but what
she invariably got the heel part of tbe
stocking on the top of her foot, and then
cried. We never saw a big girl put on
her stockings at all, but we suppose they
wear them. In fact we beli»vo they do.
We never saw a stout, heaithy man
hanging around a grocery door waiting
for somebody to treat, and cussing the
•niggers because they wouldn’t work, but
what we felt sorry for that man—sorry
that lightning wouldn’t strike him.
We never saw a boy with a stone bruise
on his foot that kept him from school,
but what could make things howl with
an Alabama sling.
Ca’verv cemetery, New York, averges
fifty funerals a day.
*
The gold interests of- North Georgia
are exciting much attention just now.
A “fast train” made Ban Francisco
from New York in 26 minutes less thau
81 hours.
There is a man in Monroe oounty who
can drink ten gallons of water daily and
suffer no inconvenience.
Onslow Steams and E. H. Rollins are
Republican candidates for United States
Senator from New Hampohire.
Princlfy Incomes.'
KuvnnoaH Wealth, us QwucrT*fy the
Great if liter Mine a.
[Correspondence N. Y. Sun.]
The yield of the Consolidated Virginia
miue in March last was $3,334,298,29.
Tiiase figures are official, as I got them
from Mr Taylor, principal bookkeeper.
Since’the mine commenced paying divi
dends ibi stockholders have received $20,-
001,000 in round numbers. The Cali
fornia wipe, the ri best known mine in
world, paid its first monthly dividend !
on the loth instant, 31,080,090, or two i
dollais per share for each of its five lmn- |
tired and forty thousand shares. These :
two mines pay monthly dividends of
$2; 160,000. I harming in Only, the Cnl
ifotuia miue is expect. and to pay it uftfith
ly dividend of three dollars per share, or 1
81,620,01X1 monthly. The present price ;
per share of these stocks is respectively : j
California, eighty dollars ; Consolidated
Virginia, seventy-three dollars. Like ah
mining stocks they are subject to start
liug fluctuations. The knowing one ,
however, do not look for any material
changes in the prices of these two stocl s
this summer. It is not altogether a mat
ter of .speculation with regard to these
mines. What ore they contain is pretty
closely ascertained. At. preseut there is
enough first-class ore therein to keep the
mines going for at least three veuis.
Col. Fair, superintendent, is now erect
iug anew eighty-stamp mill, in addition
to the numerous mills already possessed
by himself and partuers. When this is
finished you’ll hear of some unparalleled
results from tile Bona izi nin >s. Fair
j expects to turn out five hundred thous
and dollars a month. He cun do it. It
is only a question of milling facilities.
There is no lack of ore.
In view of the stupendous wealth of
these mines the question often occurs to
j me : What will be the eventual limit of
: the we alth of the four gentlemen pop. -
larly known as the "Bonanza Kiugs »”
Pejple who have.watched their fortunes
with critical eyes aver that they are now
worth in money and property upward of
$100,000,600. It is a common remark
here that Maekay has an income of SBOO,-
000, gold, a mouth. Since the Califor
nia mines commenced paying dividends
it must have added at least $150,000 to
his monthly income. . I think I may say
that his monthly ipcome is in round
numbers, a million us dollars.
James G. Fair's income is not less than
$600,000 a month ; Flood’s $750,000;
O Brien s SoOO,OiXI. Now, here are fonr
men with a gross incoru'.' of nearly $3,-
000,000 a month, every one of them
hard-working, practical business men.
Witli $100,000,000 ahead already, and a
yearly ineome of 36,000,000, I think it is
safe to put them down in January, 1879,
as the richest quartette in the world.
The question is frequently asked, What
will Maekay do with his fortune ? People
seem to forget that the more money a
man has the more uses he finds for it.
Os all the people on this coast, Maekay
himself is the least anxious about find
ing a use for his money.
I notice in the letters of correspon
dents a widespread error in regard to all
these men. It is generally believed by
eastern people who have read of the
wonderful fortunes of the “Bonanza
Kings,” that they have been acquired
within the last year, and that none of
them were comfortably fixed before the
developments of the consolidated Virginia
mine. This is all n mistake. Flood and
O’Brien were worth 200,000 ten years
ago, anil they have kept adding to it ever
since. Fair was worth half a million
«eveil years ago, aud Maekay was a mil
lionaire long before the consolidated Vir
ginia mine was dreamed of. 1 make
these corrections for tbe benefit of such
innocents as th'uk the millionaire quar
tettuo have nothing to do but throw
twenty-dollar gold pieces at every person
who takes it into his or her head to write
begging letters to them. It would not
be believed there are such arraut 100 s in
the world as some of the letters received
here prove their writers to be. Money
is asked for by the people hundreds, aye
thousands of miles away on ever v con
ceivable pretense. For instance, a Wash
ington woman wrote Maekay recently
that her daughter had been slandered,
and she requested him to forward fifteen
hundred dollars to hire counsel to take
the matter into the courts. And this is
but one of hundreds of applications that
come here every week for from one to
ten thousand dollars. People who con
template “striking” the Bonanza Kings
would do well to think better of it.
There are 25,525 idiots .n the United
States,
August Belmont is sa : d to be worth
$10,000,000.
Santa Anna is poor, livos in a cheap
house, and is partly blind.
In three years Burke county has paid
an •indebtedness of $82,000.
There are 70,000 children living on
boats in England, who receive no educa
tion.
The North Carolina Democratic Con
vention nominated Z. B. Vance for Gov
ernor.
L A«lvern«unjf Untex.
One square, first, insertion $ l <y>
Each Kubaeqneat insertion 7 >
One square three months.,.... 10 Ol
! »s«•*»'rt*«M*hs 7.7." is ».
One square twelve months....* -Jo 01
Quarter column twelve months 40 on
Half column six menfhs.., i;o i o
Half eolu;.wi twelve months no
1 Owrcolrrmn twelve mouths (rt
Sniptlered a semm e
All fractions of squares art counted full
. rt-s
i — ■ ■ •
How I was Sgld.
Bt M.VItK TWAIN.
You may remember that I lectured re
: cently for the yonug of the
! Clayouian Soc ety ? During the afternoon
! of that day I was talking with one of the
j young gentlemen referred to, aud lie
: saiu he had an uncle, who from some
j cause or other, seemed to have grown
permanently bereft of all emotion, and
j with tears in Ins eves, this young man
i said : “Oh, if I could only see him
j laugh once im#e ! Oh, if I could only
see him weep !” I was touched. I could
never withstand distress. I said :
j “Bring him to my lecture. I’ll start
him for yon.” “Oh, if you could but
Ido if. a yon could do it, all onfr family
i would bless you for evermore ; for he is
! very dear to us. Oh, my benefactor,
can yon make him laugh ? Can you
bring soothing tears to those parched
orbs.”
I was profoundly moved. I Baid :
“My son, bring the old party around. I
have got some good jokes in my lecture
that will make him laugh if there is any
laugh in him ; aud if they miss fire, I
havu got some others that will make him
cry or kill him, one or the other.”
Then the young man wept on my neck
and presently spread both bis hands on
my head aud looked up toward Heavev,
mnmbling something reverently; and
: then w«ut after his uncle. Ho placed
him in full view, in the second row of
benches, that night, and I began on him.
I tried him on mild jokes—then with se
vere ones. I dosed him with bad jokes,
; and riddled him with good ones ; I
old, stale jokes into him, and peppered
him fore aud aft with red-hot new ones.
I warmed up to my work, ands .sauHed
him on the right and left, in front and
behind ; I fumed, aud charged, and
ranted, till I was hoarse and sick, and
frantic and furious ; but I never rnovid
him once—l never started a smile’ ' r
tear ! Never a ghost of a smile, and lie' -
era suspicion of moisture ! I was as
tounded. I closed the lecture at last
with one despairing shriek—with one
wild burst of humor—and hurled a joke
of supernatural atrocity full at him I
Then I sat down bewildered and ex
hausted.
The president of the society came up
aud bathed my head with col i water,
ami said : “’What made you carry on so
toward the last?
I saiil, "I was trying to make that
confounded old idiot laugh, in the s< .
oud row. ”
Aud he said, “Well, you wore wasting
your time ; because he is deaf and dumb
and as blind ns a badger.”
Now, was that any way for that old
man’s nephew to impose on a stranger
aud an orphan like me ?
A Texas Heroine.
Houston (Texas) Age.
There was a batch of convicts from
some interior county seat awaiting the
departure of the Great Northern cars to
convey them on their melancholy jour
ney to the prison walls of the penitenti
ary at Huntsville. Among the rough,
unshaven and crime-steeped physiogno
mies that scowled from heneath greasy
and tattered slouched hats, amid the
clanking of their fetters and chains, w"g
a rather handsome face of a young mr,
whose open features betokened no traces
of the branded felon.
Near him stood—a strange companion
for such a crowd—a fair young girl,
scarcely passed her fourteenth year,
whose long hair flowed down over her
shoulders that had not yet felt the weight
of time, and whose countenance was a
living photograph of innocence and girl
ish beauty.
Upon inquiry it was ascertained that
the young man had received a two years’
sentence for marrying a girl under the
age prescribed by law after swearing
she was of legal age, and that with the
lofty and sacred devotion of true heroism
his youthful bride, despite the entreaties
of friends, was following him to his ig
nominious prison, to share his captivity
and lighten his punishment, provided
the officers of the penitentiary can be
prevailed on to permit her entrance.
In the practice of turning card comers
the upper left hand comer denotes “vis
ite,” and is use J for an ordinary call;
the upper right hand comer turned
down means “felicitation,” aud is fora
visit pf congratulations ; the lower left
hand oorner, “couge,” represents a fare
well call, and the lower right comer,
“condolence,” expresses a desire to sym
pathize with bereqyement. The rule
most generally understood is the turning
of one end of the card, which denotes a
wish to see the ladies of the family.
The lawyers of this country are said to
coiit six times as much as the ministers;
but there is more law thau religion in
this country.
A gentleman living near Augusta has
| peaches and plums growing on the same
| tree. The plum branches were grafted
j on a peach tree.
The outlay for the artistic and literary
i features in Harper’s Magazine is esti
mated to be over $70,000 a year.