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tttutk
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niSCELUKEOtlS.
From the Southern Post.
FIRE IN CHARLESTON.
A letter from HUfinm Barlow, Esq., to h : s
cousin Hubert Barlow; wherein, among
•other things, hr relates what beftl him du-
Ytng the, great Jit c in Charleston.
Dear Cousin Bob:—While important
jnatters worthy of remembrance and circula-
lation, are fresh upon my mind, they should
at all convenient times be registered for the
good of others. A firm belief in the portion
j have assumed, induces me to send you a
few lines upon a subject important to all
mv relations for their immediate benefit and
instruction. And that I may do justice to
myself and render the observations I am
going to make, more interesting to you, I
will commence by saying, that about tliree-
and-threc-quarter weeks ago, I was taken
with a great longing for travelling, and af
ter much study upon the subject, I conclud
ed I would go to Charleston, it being a great
Southern city, and the expense not very-
great. So the next day after f came to the
conclusion, I saddled old Soap Sticks and
put out for Warrenton; and I got there
just as the Old-boy with his smoke, brim
stone, fire, soot-bags and thunderations rein
ed up upon a public street, to the great
fright of Soap Sticks; and being unused to
such sights, he acted over his youthful days
by way of sundry kicks, rearings, pitchings,
prancings and cavertings, to the great ha
zarding of my peace and bones. Finally 1
hid his old worn out carcas in a stable,where
he would be well attended to until I return
ed, and immediately entered a long, green,
eight-wheeled wagon, which followed the
ear, or cart, or whatever it is, ready for de
parture. Rut plague the departure ! 1 sat
there two long hours stone still, and alone to
boot, and not a jot did the old thing move.
After a while the bell rung, and we put out
backwards! Y*s, Bob, backwaids! for
the blade smoking car which carries all the
rest, was behind, and I with mv f'ac* to it ;
consequently, my hack was facing the way
we were going. Such mysterious facts may
be unaccountable to you—they are never
theless true. Nothing of great importance
happened that day ; but the next we were
bothered on the Sun'll Carolina Rail Road j
about eight hours, lur this simple te- son—^ j
the night before, a locomotion, with some \
other small locomotions tied to her tail, run
clean, ciY.af off the track, antitore it all to
smash a good ways. YY r e had to stay there
until everv thing was fixed--whereby, we
had to travel about 70 miles in the night.
But 1 tell you what, Bob, it wasn’t old Soap’s
cantering gallop, which is the top of bis lo
comotion ; no, not by r a jug full, lor she
went with a perfect freedom over creeks,
rivers and swamps, high and dry ; the sparks
allvitig and I scared nearly into duck fits.
We <>-Qt to the sitty at last— but every thing
was as dark as,*;n : hat, for it was past one
o’clock in the night, a?* there hehi no om
minister, or rather money Im ' tc, s *' | ei*P» ’
left on foot for a restiu place, and by allow
ing others, I was soon way up yonder last a-
slcep, in a mazing high, long and big bouse,
called Shelton’s Hotel. Now, B >b, by way
of m iralizing, let me sav a word or two
here. It, as 1 did in the darkness of night,
all people would in distressing daik circum
stances of lile, wh n all -eenis b itheratlm
and tanglement, unwilling to rely upon their
own knowledge, follow the advtct and know
ledge of others, they w mid often soon get
out of difficulty, perplexity and danger, and
repose as 1 did tiiatnight; in ease and safety.
Next rnirnin I walked here, and there and
every where. But before 1 sallied forth, 1
bought one of the slickest, prettiest, gen-
teekst black hats you ever saw ; and more
than all that, Bob, a pair of boots. Yet 1
am unfortunate, Bob ; my hat was so much
prettier than my phiz, that every person
thought it had fallen into bad company.
And m v trow»erg being none of the longest,
1 just could cover the top of my boots with
them, and every step 1 took, the boot legs
lleiv backwards and fbtards, going Hop, flop,
till at last a little terrapin-eyed, sandy-hair
ed, saddle-nosed, long-eared son of a tinker,
dressed in call-skin and wool, called upon
some of his comrades to “look at a new
walking edition of Burke on the Sublime
and Beautiful,” pointing at me, Bob. Now,
who Burke is, 1 can’t say ; but if he thought
I was from Burke county, he was mistaken;
and as for Sublime and Beautiful, 1 haven’t
the honor of their acquaintance. I finally
went into a store and asked for elastic
strops; for I knew if the strops would not
give way when 1 set down, tire seat of my
britches would. And the feller after look
ing at my condition below, handed me a
gre«t long pair of gallowses. I left the
bouse, as I do the subject now, without fur
ther comment.
In the evenin I went out on the big pond,
in a great long white ship, called a steam-
packet Neptune, nearly out o’sight o’land.
By jings ! I felt the spirit of something—
perhaps my dinner. It was as soul and
stomach a stirring time to me, as the “ days
°f ~(i” to our progenies; for recollecting
Hie British once were there, I felt martial,
bellipotent, bellicon, and belligonei ous. Pat
riotic feelings swelled my heart as big as
your fist; and I just wanted to see that man
Lord Rawdou and his infernal crew, to fight
nis squad by myself, while (as 1 heard them
*ay,)
“ Sonorous inctol, blowing martial sounds,"
sent over ihe water ihe. voice wl gl ny and of
war. We came back, and feeling a kind of
goneness in the empty parts of my body, I
ttade a terrible grip in Shelton’s table that
night.
But now, Bob, comes that which I would
willingly overlook ; which, were I chroni
cler of past, present, and future, I could not
Put down on paper without feeling curious
a over. I went to the theatre to see what
was done there; and just about half past
ei ght, by my old regulator, some one hollow-
* lr e ! One or two men yi He i fire ! in
st'n 10use,and then runout; but I set stone
s‘<r ' T' S ° d * d near| y every one else. A sad
Bob * vv* 6 hardl - v ever act disinterestedly,
’ "hen show was over I went out,
j an ‘* no ' far behind the theatre a great many
j houses were burning. My souls, what a
fuss! hells a ringin, some a hollowing,
horses blind-folded runnin away with caits
jo them, women a faintin’ and runuio here
and there with bundles, screamin and cry-
in, men pale and tremblin, the wind a blow-
in a perlect gu-to, houses lumhlin down on
fire, ihe flame away up yonder, so i.dimes
by itself, a roarin and twistin, large coals
o‘fire flyin, and smoke as b ack as a pot co
vered ihe whole heaven. Tl.n- it went on,
up King street and back and sideways, xvhile
about forty thousand people, men, women
and children, and a great multitude of t al
ler niggeis, mixid and swarmed and ran
over one another, sometimes under horses
heels, and sometimes under (ire ingines
drawn by niggers. Now ^nd then, I could
hear ’em say, “yonder is a dead man,there
is a leg broke,” and then, “stop that thief,”
and then, “ get out of the way down there,”
and by the time it was said, out would tum
ble a box, or a bed, or something else, from
a window up stairs. And fine, clocks and
glasses with gold trames, and planners, and
orgins, and all kinds of furniture, were bro
ken in the streets ; and no wonder, for ma
ny wild horses with cai ts and boxes, run
against one another,and over people,knock
ing them down and breaking every thing
they carried. Mourning, crying, shouting,
bawling, screaming, laughing, thieving,
squealing, horses and pigs a burning, re
moving the sick, the wounded and the de ad,
all a goin on at once. Where was I, Bob '!
Right there in the front of the hubbub,walk-
in here and there, to see and hear everv
thing that was a goin on. But, ah me ! 1
soon got into a dreadful fix. 1 was stand-
in some where in the neighborhood of what
is called the bend in King street, when I
heard a horn blow. Every person who had
located in my neighborhood, immediately
imigratedto foreign paits; but I thought they
had gone to see a house a burnin, or some
thing el>e,so I was glad to be left alone. But
I thought he must be a hard hearted man,
who could go about tootin a ram’s horn on
such an occasion. But just as be stopped,
I thought old Nick bad set lire to his maga
zine: for 1 never heard such a confounded
report in all m\ life. 1 was about twenty-
steps fr. hi a bouse that was blown up will*
gunpowder. I decamped yvith amazin speed,
and when I stopped, J thought of a line the
boys used to read in sclr ol :
“ Oh, fur n hiding place in some vast wilderness,
Sume houndI«-bs rnntigiioUbiieSN ul salet},”
—for just at that time, the battle of Bun
ker’s lliil would have been a house of re
fuge. Not long after, a horn blowed, and
as the b uck when the hounds are behind
him, so ran I as if the devil was at my heels.
A way i yvent over women,children, men and
ho>.-es, n -r did 1 stop tili I was nearly tired
lo death. 1 had not stopped long, when
another born hieyv, and away I bounded
again ; my head hack, and my new hat in
my hand, coat tail straight behind, and my
boots a flopping, and ran till l panted like a
iizatd. 1 stopped on the corner of Meclin
street, and one unknown to this deponent,
where stood a great big ytillow nigge. cryin
and blubberin about bis burnin bouse. Says
he, “I pray the fire will stop.” “Amen,”
says I. Whereupon he applied bis fingers
to his nose, and blew a blasi louder than a
brazen trumpet. I did not wait to say fare-
W‘ll, but [nit out immediately, thinkin ano
ther house yvns about to be blowed up. As
I was runnin along East Bay street, a sailor
was cruizing along the coast wiih a three
pronged pitchfork in his hand, and without
furling a sail, followed close in mv wake,and
Jyoariied me ststern with his grappliii irons ;
ms*kin fhr *e marks on HIV private log hook.
Such piratical encioachments G.'J my reserv
ed limit's, caused nn- to shorten sail, iiGt.st my
flam, and show fimht. The inimy then hurl
ed*round oil my larboard stile, and made
p'ain sailing lor the R ca- ^ soon came into a
s'reet where there wen* a l t w pcop'e, and
yvns wa'kin lowly, lookin awav pff vondei
at that moi tal big tavon burnin. Now' "
happened that an old lady come down the
street, rolling a b rrel of something, in a dog
trot mectin me; she yvas lookin down at the
barrel, and I up yonder at the burnin tavern
—consequently, her barrel took me justbe-
tyveen tie* knees and ancles, which stopped
the motion of my legs, yvhile the motion of
my upper story was increased ; so at her I
yvent, her head lodgin in the neighborhood
of the short ribs, my hands on the pave
ment, my heels in the air. The old crazy
thing squalled and crept from under me,
while the light of the fire enabled her to cull
me a freckled face taller depot. There I
stood, “ the Grecian bend,” my hands on
the affected parts, breath knocked out, hat
gone, and the people laughin. She called
me an insolent, good for nofhing, pale lac
ed, frost bitten, scape galloyvs :
Snys I, ol) hush, and we pnrtpd,
She with her rum, and I broken liearted.
My pretty hat, yvith three long thrip-a-
hundred segars, had vanished; and such
misfortunes befel me all that night. Men
in uniformity coats and caps, with blunder-
busses, yvent every where, wlitle the firemen
yvith theii plaguy wagons run over me seve
ral tim«*s—all of which frighted me very
much. While one corner of the theater
was burnin, a man walked out to the place
on the top of the house, and in smoke and
fire tried to cut the burnin part of!' with an
axe : all the firemen and every body else
stopped wo k and hollowed huzza ! huzza!
and mv shrill pipes occasionally struck in
after this sort, Pz-zay ! I thought of a man
I once heard ofi named Nero, I think, who
was fiddlin while Rome was burning; for
though ihe man deserved praise, ihey need
ed wat<*r more. So to help them, 1 went to
the water thing to catch hold ot a cross han
dle the men were working up and down;
md happenin to walk too close,tip* first time
she went up, she took me under the chops
in such a manner, that my lantern ja'vs pop
ped like a steel trap, and sent me oil on my
back t < attend to my oyvn business. When
day light come I left the fire, which was
checked soon after, (or the cars, and since
that time, my bump of Locomo:ior.ers,which
Frenologers call the desire of travellin, has
sunk o nothin. My love to all.
Yours, Omnipotent,
BILLY BARLOW.
Dooly Dist. Warren Co., Geo. >
May 17, 1«33. J
Suicide of an Indian Chief.—Cit-chy-kernels,
a cnief belonging to the Creek tribe of Indians,
committed suicide yesterday, on board the
the steamboat Dolphin, at this place, by hanging
himself while the persons on beard yvere at din
ner. He was about seventy vears old, and was
quite a distinguished chief.-—Cine/nncrfi Whig.
THE STREAM OF LIFE.
The following beautiful passage is from a
sermon preached by Bishop Reber, to
bis parishioners a short time before his
departure for India, in IS23.
“Life bears us on like the stream of a
mighty river; our boat, at first glides down
; the narrow channel through the playful ! pose, Phil was getting out ol p;
! murmuring* of the little brook, and the “What would you say"if I was t
HO. 52.
winding of its grassy border. The tree
j shed their blossoms over our young heads;
i the flowers on the brink seem to ofler tliem-
| selves to our young hands; we are hap-
! py in hope, and we grasp eagerly at the
j beauties around us; but the stream hur-
j ri<»s on, and still our hands are empty,
j “Our course in youth and manhood is a
i long a wider and deeperflood, and amid
| o jects more striking and magnifi ent. We
j arc animated by the moving picture of en
joyment arid industry which passes be
fore us; we are excited by some short
lived success, or depressed and rendered
miserable by equally short-lived disap
pointment. Bui our energy and our de
pendant e are both in vain. The stream
bears us on, and our joys and our grids
are alike left behind us; we may be ship
wrecked but we cannot anchor; our voy
age may be hastened but it cannot be de
layed; whether rough or smooth, the river
hastens towards its home, till the roaring
ol the ocean is in our ears, and the tossing
of the waves is beneath our keel, and the
lands lesson from our eyes, and the floods
are lifted up around us, and we take out
last leave ol earth and its inhabitants, and
of our further voyage there is no witness,
but the Infinite and Eternal.
“And do we still take so much anxious
thought for the future days, when the days
which are gone by have so strangely and
uniformly deceived us? Can we still so
set our hearts on the creatures of God,
when we find by sad experience, that the
Creator only is permanent? Or shall we
not rather lay aside every weight and ev
ery sin which does most easily beset us,
and think of ourselves henceforth as way-
hiring persons only who have no abiding
inheritance but in the hope of a better
world, and to whom even that world would
be worse than hopeless, if it were not for
our Lord Jesus Christ, and the interest we
have obtained in his mercies.
deed!—YVhat is it looks like Squire O’Ri- | QUAKER ECONOMY,
ley’s gate with the bars knocked out ex- j A Judge, on a journey, fell in company wiih a
cept one in the middle?” “Faith and its j Q'^ker. -Sir,’ said the Judce, ‘how is it that
H.” To be sure it is ye spaleen.” Soon ! >’ ou Q» ak rs «I ways have fat horses, and mo.
he went illustrating in this manner, until j ne ' in > l,,ir pockets?
he trot to the let.er O. h^ in „ , r \J P-.Uo * Q uak f^ B .V and by I will tell thee*
j Shortly after, they arrived at a tavern. The
j Judge called for a glass of bitters, and urged the
Quaker 10 drink; but he refused, saying, ‘I have
FRIENDSHIP—A SIMILE.
An aged oak, rearing its head exposed
and alone on a barren hill, the rough blast
whistles through its worn out limbs; the
battering hail beats forcibly against its
side. Long it has braved the raging el
ements—long magnanimously withstood
their fury—but its strength now fails; ex
hausted and fatigued, with no friendly
wood in pari to sc r< en it from the assail
ing storm, it groans a while beneath its fu
ry, until at length its branches are served
and dispersed by alLlhe sweeping powers
of heaven’s elect! ic ball.
So it is with friendless man; the dark
rolling waves of adversity incessantly rush
against him; the clouds, as black and
rough, they roll along the sky of sorrow,
emit their sulphurous flames on his devo
ted head—amazed he stands, no friendly
arm appears to rescue him from the roar
ing cataract of ruin; hence falls the
wretched creature and sinks amidst the
whirling waves to rise no more.
he got to the letter O; having tried Pat
genues with two or three ways to no pur-
tience—
to hit you
a pa It hog on the ear?” (suiting the action
to tne word) “O,” cried Pat, clapping his
hand upon the afflicted spot which rung
with the blow. “I knew you’d find it,”
said Phil. By the help of this adoption,
Pat struggled through the rest of the let
ters. “YY r ell, you may sit down now and
send up Mike Moriarty.” Mike was ra
ther further than Put, lie was spelling
words. After spelling two or three toler
ably well, he came to the word what.
“Well, what does w-h-a-t make?” Mike
was not sure of it. “YY r -h-a-t sounds fat,
but, (const ions of his own error in the pro
nunciation,) when I say pit, don’t you say
far, but do you say fat in your own way.”
“Have ye all said ver lessons?” “Y~es, all,
all.” “Then put out the fire dacenlly and
go hum.”
of*The Senator, but he has never yet stated nor
mWvhat 1 really said irulv and fairly; and, af
ter his many and unsuccessful attempts to show
^rWliat I_suggested to be erroneous, I now under-
^ P° sit ‘ v ely, and without the least
AN IRISH SCHOOL-MASTER.
From Se rif's and Sketches of a Soldier’s life in Ireland
In the midst of his noisy mansion sat
Phil Sullivan, wielding his birch as if it
had been a sceptre, while his little sub
jects were ranged around on benches
formed of soils, that you may still see along
the wall. The fire, when any was requir
ed, was made in the centre of the apart
ment, the fuel being furnished by each
scholar brii.’hing a turf daily with him.
The door was /?’' nied of stakes, inter-
placed with wattles, Bmp of which
thrown over a crooked harp served the
purpose of a lock, and a rude tabic that
the master sat at was all the desk in the
school. As they came in at the door, the
urchins were obliged to make their best
bow, by drawing back the left leg, catch
ing the tuft of hair that hung over the
forehead, and bringing tin ir stiff necks to
the precise mathematical curve that con
stitutes politeness, while Phil kept some
times talking English, sometimes Irish, to
suit himself to the comprehension of his
pupils. Of the manner in which he ac
companied this, the following is a speci
men:—“Come up here Pat Greehen,”
said he to a red-headed boy, dressed in a
grey frieze coat, which came down to his
heels, and a pair of old leather breeches,
that only reached half way down his
thighs, exposing his red measly legs—
“Come stand up here on the table, and let
the boys hear how well you can say your
letters.” Pat mounted with great confi
dence; but when his phiz, by being raised
into the light, became more distinctly
seen,—“Ubboboo, tearin, murder!” ex-
claimed Phil, “where hab you been wid
that lace? YVhy man alive you’ve been
kissing the pral y pot, and your hair, too,
standing up lor a price, like the bristles of
a fighting pig. Is there no water in the
stream; and it would have been no great
trouble to draw your fingers through your
hair, any how." Pat very composedly
lifted up the tail of his coat, and spitting
upon it, gave his face a wipe that left it
streaked like a brindled cow. “There
now,” said Phil, “blow )-our nose and
hold up your head like a gentleman.
What is this aroon?” said he, pointing to
the first letter in the alphabet. Pat
scratched his head! “Y’ou don’t know
what it is; small blame to you, for your
mother keeps you running after the cows
when you should be at your larnin; but
look up at the couples of the house, and
try if you can’t rpmemher it.” “A,” said
Pat. “Well done! what’s the name of
the next one?” Pat hesitated again.
“YVhat do you call the big fly that makes
the honey?” “B.” “Och, you’re a genues,
Pat, ready made.” Having arrived at
the letter H,—“And what’s that, Pat?”—
“Be my showl I don’t know.” “D-m-n
your showl, what do you mane by swear
ing here in school? a pretty college this in-
From the Mobil-- Examiner.
THE TIMES.
The timrs are changing! Faces that erst
were full of melancholy begin to brighten up;
and old Industry, who was taken aback bv “o-
vertradinir,” or ‘the specie circular,” is casting
her eyes around to seek a place for her renew
ed operations. Two years ago the flush of
youth was on her, aid like that ardent period,
she rushed on heedlesj of ail save the brilliant
casile which imagination had huili in the dis
tance. She readied .lie goal and found it an
air-bmlt fabric—baseb-ss as a vision. The
shock of returning reason was great and she
sank amidst her own fallen hopes. She awakes
now, and is gazing around her for an opportuni
ty to commence anew. She still has the strength
of youth, but the experience of confirmed matu
rity is also hers.
There have been man.* theories sought out to
account lor all tins prost ation of industry, and
most of them have origmited more from anxie
ty to cast odium upon a certain set of men, than
to elicit truth or to bring matters back to tlieir
former siate of prosperity. For our part, we
cannot resist the notion that the main cause of
this singular state of affairs is to be found—not
in any siugle act of government, nor in a combi
nation of its hcls—but in the remarkable pros,
perity ol our countrymen, which induced reck
less confidence and seduced them from the die-
tates ol prudence and discretion—wi ich led
mem io grasp wealth, not by the ordinary means
—ilie slow and laburious process of our fore
fathers— but by a rash and a reckless disregard
ol their results. The causes which induced
tins habit of speculation were in operation long
bolore the so called objectionable policy of the
last administration was conceived, and even
iheir ctfecis were in full completion at that time.
Hut we do not seek for causes—we are glad tiiat
the storm is well.night past, and that the sky be-
gins to bieak iorth in glorious splendor.
It would be well for the cool and those who
are unbiassed by political feeling to scrutinize
this subject—lo bring fort.i Irom the fool mass
ol extraneous matter, some theory which is al
together impartial in its reasoning—some facts
not addressed io the parly feeling of men—but
to their reason.
VVe tieliuve most sincerely that the gi eat con
vulsion oi the Iasi eigbt"en months, lias purged
the Arne*ican cliaracier of muon that is objec-
tiouabie—has been the active cause of a great
deni ol good. Men have lost their property bv
it—but tilery have guiin d infinitely in every one
ul the higher cliaract* listicsof our natures.—
l’he individual cous< quences have been disas
trous in liie extreme—but the general lessons
leai ned cannot be computed bv dollars and cents.
Lot all look forward. The past is a picture io
produce only regret. Energy and prudence
must be put on, and live years hence all will be
right.
“We will hope,” says a late New Yorker,
“that our countrymen have learned bv ex peri-
ence just sufficient to correct and cnasten tlieir
over-sanguine temperament, and that hereafter
we shall keep nearer the golden mean between
narrowness and extravagance. The times are
turning; let industry and its rewards feel the firs!
impulse, and e: it thence extend more slowly to
all interests. Let ihe national energies lor one
yeai at least b>* devoted, so far as possible, to in
creased production and the general adjustment
ol debts; after that will be time lor new enterprise
in I'.uilding, in improving, and in the more liaz
ardotis add slowly productive departments of
laudable enterprise- A vea' of resolute univer-
ver-al, and prosperous industry will work won-
de s; and tin* harvesting <>l live millions bushels
extra of wheat will add far more to the Nation
al wealth than Ihe import of five millions ol dol
lars in specie. We have high hopes of a genial
and bountiful season: may it not be vouchsafed
to us in vain.
PRETTY KEEN.
Rev. Mr. Holmes of New B :dford, related the
following anecdote at ihe lair anniversary of the
American Seamen’s Friend Society, in this
city:
“Two sailors once met—the one looked down
cast and forlorn; the other accosted him, ‘Ship
mate, what’s the matter?’ ‘Ah!’ >aid the forlorn
man, ‘I am sick and destitute—I have no money
to supply my wants ’ The other put his hand
in his [>ocke:, and poured out his x onev, with
out weight or measure. A merchant looking on,
said ‘Shipmate, now you certainly ought not to
do so—you oughi at least to ake a note o' him
for your money.’ ‘1 am no merchant,’ said ihe
sailor; 1 never take notes lor my charity.”—N.
Y. Journal of Commerce.
FROM THE WASHINGTON CHRONICLE
A POLITICAL CONSCIENCE.
Definition.—A thing that will not let its own.
er sleep on his bed, if there beanv treaty with
the Indians South of Mason’s and Dixon’s line
—(the owner lining North—) iest some wrong
orinjus'ice lie done the red-man—but which is
very quiet and somniferous, if a treaty be in pro
gress to compel ihe Northern red-man to seek
shelter from Northern cupidity and ambition, on
ihe far shores of the Pacific. Or, in other words,
a monitor in the bosom that says to the red-man
of the South—“Use ynur tomahawk on your
heardess oppressors/” and turning to them in
the North exc aims—“ Began-, you worthless
dogs ! Your lands or your life /”
The Bhrenologists have; got hold of Osceola’s
skull. They sav that the head is very fully de-
vel"|>ed in the forward and higher regions, ex
hibiting according to the system of tlieir science,
a great |>erpouderance ofthe moral and inteltec-
tual,over the animal The large devel- pement
of destructiveness and combativeness is counter-
balanced by a large organ of benevolence.
The organ >*f music is defective; the trombonp
was his favorite ins'rument. Amativeness is not
remarkable, pliiloprogenitiveness large, inliabi-
tiveness large, veneration very large. The out
line of his forehead is pere^endicular.
no need.’ The Judge then called fur two quarts
of oats for his horse, and the Quaker for four for
his.
Quaker—Now 1 will tell thee: ve drink no
spirits at the taverns. How much didst thou pay
for the bitters?
Judge—Sixpence.
Quaker—How much for the oats?
J.—Sixpence. - /
Q.—My oats cost me ninepence; and whj4^
good do tlie bitters do thee?
J.—They procured an appetite.
Q.—A bslinence gives me an appetite. Thus
you see. that we spend no moe than thou, and
our horses are fat. But I have not done with
thee yet. 1 see silver buckles on thy shoes;
how much did they cost?
J.—Nine dollars.
Q.—How long hast thou had them?’
J.—Eight years.
Q.—Do they answer any better service than
mv strings?
J.—No.
Q —With nine dollars we should have bought
livestock; and at the expiration of five years we
should have had fifteen head of cattle. Here
thou seest we can have money in our pockets.—
Instead of wearing silver on our shoes, we have
leather strings.
MODERN DEFINITIONS.
FROM FOWLER’S CAST IRON DICTIONARY.
Affectionate.—Ki-sing a young Indy with
your mouth full of tohoeco.
Coward.—One who refuses to fire a pistol at
you at your special desire.
Dews.—The teats of Heaven over the depart,
ure of Day.
Discontented.—That morbid state of dissatis
faction, which renders one incapable of enjoy,
ing the good things in his posession.
Disinterested.—Accepting a lucrative office
at i lie parlicular and urgent request of thepeo-
pie.
Drunkard.—One who is posessed of an evil
spirit which has destroyed his free agency.
Fashion —The voluntary slavery which
leads us to think, act and dress according to
the judgement of fools and the caprice of cox
combs.
Felicity.—The horizon of the heart, which is
always receding as we advance towards it.
Fishery.— the agriculture of the sea.
Fool.—YVhat a fop sees in the looking-glass.
Gentleman.—The filling of a coat.
Gold.—Dead earth, for which many men sac
rifice life and lose heaven.
Integrity.—Wearing a large cloak to cover
ail deformity.
Kindness.—Loaning 1000 dollars at two
per cent, a month, and paying the amount in
unctirieni money at six [>er cent discount.
Lady. — An appendage to a bonnet.
Man of Decision—One who insists that his
wife shall kindle a fire on a cold morning.
Rascality.—Being fool enough to get found
out in deeds of wickedness.
CONGRESSIONAL.
SPEECH OF MR. CALHOUN,
In reply to M r . Webster, on the Sub-Treas
ury Bill. Delivered in the Senate of the
United States, March 22, 183S.
[concluded.]
Such was my argument, which the Senator,
months alter it was delivered, undertakes to
controvert; but. I must say, for my life, 1 could
noi understand his reasons. He lost his usual
clearness, and became vague and obscure, as
any one must who attempts io refute wha' is so
perfectly evident. To escape fiom his difficul
ty, lie. with his usual address, confounded what
I had said on another subject, with another
point, which tie thought more easily answered,
and against which ue directed his attack. He
stated that I propo-ed a Government paper, and
that mv noti -n is, that all the paper that circu
lates should he Government paper; and then in
sisted that it would be the union of the political
and money power, and would do more lo cen
tralize the currency and exchanges than the
connection of the Government with the banks.
Now, unfortunately for the Senator, I propo
sed no such thing, and expressed no notion of
the kind, nor any thing like it. He may search
every spe<-ch 1 have delivered at this and the
extra session, and he can find nothing to justify
his assertion. To pul this beyond all dispute,
1 will quote what l did say, and the only thing
that I ever did that could afford even a pretext
for his assertions. The extracts are taken
from my remarks at the extra session.
“1 intend to propose nothing. It would be
impossible, wiih so great a weight of opposition
to pass any measure without ttie entire support
of the Administration; and, if it were, it ought
not to be attempted when so much must depend
on me mode of execution. The best measure
that could be devised might fail, and impose a
heavy responsibility on its author, unless it met
witli ihe hearty approbation of those who are
to ex(*cute it. i then intend mereL to throw out
suggestions, in order to excite the reflections of
otiieis.” &c>
“Believing that there might be a sound and
safe paper currency founded on the credit ol
the Government exclusively, 1 was desirous that
those who are responsible and have the power
should have availed themselves of the opportu
uity of Hie temporary deficit in the Treasury,
and the postponement of the fourth instalment
intended to be deposited with the Stab-s, to use
them as the means ol affording a circulation for
the present relief of the country and the banks,
during the process of separating them from the
Government.," &c.
Here is not a word about proposing; on the
ct ntrary, I expressly stated, 1 propose nothing;
that I but threw out suggestions for reflection.
Instead of excluding all paper from circulation,
I suggested the use (not of Treasury notes, as
he stated, or any other paper containing a pro
mise to pay money) but simply one which should
contain a promise to be received in the dues of
the Government; and that, to*>, only to the ex
tent necessary to meet the temporary deficit of
of the Treasury, and to alleviate the process of
separating from the banks; and this he has ar
bitrarily construed and perverted to suit his pur
pose in the manner I have shown!
It is a great misfortune that there should be
brought into this Chamber the habits contracted
at the Bar, where advocates contend for victory,
without being scrupulous about the means; while
h *re l e only object ought to be truth and the
good of the country. All other considerations
ought to be forgotten within these walls, and
the only struggle ought to be to ascertain what
is true and calculated to piomote the honor and
happiness of the community. Great individual
injustice is done by such misstatements of argu
ments. The Senator’s speech will be published
a«d circulated in quarters where my correction
of his statements will never reach; and thousands
will attribute opinions to me that I never ottered
nor entertained.
The suggeslioas which he has so perverted
have been a favorite topic of attack on the part
that I can be answered, what heretofore I
_but suggested; that a paper issued bv Go
vernment, with the simple promise to receive it
its dues, leaving its creditors to take it, or
Id ijiul silver, at tlieir option, would, to the
tent tnat it would circulate, form a perfect pa-
r circulation, which could not be abused bv
evSovernment, that would be as steady and
niform in value as the metals themselves, and
i«<hat..if, by possibility, it should depreciate, the
loss would fall, not on the People, but on the
i Jpoyiernment itself; for the only effi*c’ of depre-
^ciation would be virtually to reducp the taxes,
to prevent which the interest of the Government
would he a sufficient guaranty. I shall not go
int<* the discussion now, but on a suitable occa
sion I shall be able to m ike good everv word I
have uttered. f would lie able to do more, to
prove that it is within the constitutional power
of Congress to use such a paper, in the man
agomen' af its finances, accotdmg to the inns'
rigid mle of construing the Constitution; and
those, at least, who think that Congress can
authorise Pip notes of pr'vwte Stale corpo
rations to be received in the public dues,
are estopped from denying its right to re
ceive its own paper, ff it can virtually endorse
hv law, on the notes of specie-paving banks,
“receivable in payment ot the public dues,” it
surely can order the same words to be written
on a blank piece of paper.
Such is tne character of the paper I suggest
ed, and which the Senator says would do moo*
to centralize the circulation and exchanges than
the union of the Government and the banks,
which however he signally failed to prove.—
That it would have a greater tendency than the
exclusive receipt in its dues of gold and silver,
I readily acknowledge, and to that extent 1 think
it objectionable; fur 1 do not agree with the Sen
ator that there should be some one great empo-
rittm, which should have control of the com
merce, currency, s.nd exchanges of the Union
I hold it desirable in neither a political nor com
mercial point ol view, and to be contrary to the
genius of our institutions and the spirit of the
Constitution, which expressly provides, among
other tilings, that no preference should be given
to the ports of one State over anot her. But
that n receivable paper, such as 1 suggested,
would have a greater, or as great tendency to
centralize the commerce and currency of the
country as the union with the banks, I utterly
deny; and, if, 1 had no other reason, the vehe
ment opposition of the Senator, who approves
of such tendency, w< uld be conclusive; but
there are others that are decisive.
The centralizing tendency of such a paper
would result exclusively from tne facility it
would afford to lemittance from distant portions
of the Union, in which respect it would stand just
on a par with bank notes, when received in the
dues of the public; while the latter would, in
addition, give to the favored port, where the mo
ther bank might be located, (or the head of the
league of Stale banks) the immense profits from
the use of public deposites, and the still greater
from having their notes received in Goverment
dues. The two united would afford unbounded
facilities in the payment of custom house-bonds,
and give millions of profit annually, derived ex
clusively from the use of Government credit —
This great facility and vast increase of profit
would give a great and decided advantage to the
commerce of the section where the head of the
system might be located, and which, in a great
measure, accounts for the decay of the commerce
of the South, where there were no hanks, when
this Government was established, and which of
course, gave to the other section exclusively all
the benefit derived from the connection. It
specie had from the first been exclusively re
ceived in the public dues, the present commer
cial inequality would never have existed; and I
may add, it never will cease till we return to
the constitutional currency. YVhat the Si nutor
has said as to the union of the political and mo
ney powers, and the tendency to extravagance
from the use of Treasury notes and their depre
ciation, is so clearly inapplicable to the descrip
tion of paper 1 suggested, that I no not deem it
necessary to waste words to reply to it.
Having now repelled his reply to my remarks
at this and the extra session, 1 shall next
proceed to notice his argument on the ques
tion under discussion, « hich, extraordinary as
it mav seem, constitutes by far the most meagre
and inconsiderable portion of his speech. T e
Iructures he reared with so much lalior is com
posed of a little centre building, af some t en-
tv or thirty feet square, with an extended wing
on each side, and a huge portico in front. 1
have, I trust, effectually demolished the wings,
and propose next to go through the same process
w tu the centre building.
As long as was the sjreech, it contai ed but
three, or, at the utmost, four arguments, direct
ly applicable to the question under discussion;
of whict two have again and agam been repeat
ed by hrm every time he lias addressed the Sc
ante; another was drawn fiom an argument of
mine in lavor of the bill, whicti tne Senator has
misstated, and pressed into his service against
it, and the other is neither altogether new, nor
very well founded, or, from its character, of
much force. 1 shall b<-gin with it.
The Senat'M objected to the collection of the
the public dues in gold and silver, because, as
lie conceives, it would be exceedingly inconve
nient; in proof of which, and in order lo present
as strong a piemre as possible, he went into mi
nute calculations and details. He first suppos
ed tiiat the average pence revenue would he e-
qual to thirty millions annua ly, and the average
deposites to twenty-one. He then estimated
that this vast sum would have to be counted at
least five times in the year, and then estimated
that it would require eight hundred thousand
dollars to be counted daily, which would require
a (tost of officers, in his opinion, to fierform the
task. The answer to all this is easy. In the
firs' place, the Senator has over-estimated the
average receipts by at least one hundred per
cent. Fifteen millions ought to be much near
er the truth than thirty. Even that I regard as
exceeding what the expenditure ought to be;
and I venture to assert, that no Administration
which expends more on an average lor the next
few years can maintain iiaelf, unless there should
be some unexpected demand on the Treasury.
In the next place, twenty.one millions is at least
five times loo large for the average deposites.
Should this hill pass, three millions would be
much nearer the truth. YVe shall hear no more
of surplusses, when the revenue is collected in
gold and silver. This wtiuld make a groat de
duction in his estimate of the trouble and labor
in counting. But I give the Senator his own
estimate, and ask him if he never heard of other
and shorter modes than counting, of ascertain
ing the amount in coins? he not know
that it can be ascertained with as much certain
ty and exactness by weight as bjf counting, and
with more despatch, when the amoiiqt is large,
m coins than in his favorite bank notes? If I
am not misinformed, it is the mode adored at
the English Exchequer, and that it is donlf frith
the greatest possible promptitude by experiqiiked
individuals; so tnat his formidable objection van
ishes.
But the Senator next tells us, that ^stated, in
my remarks, that the bill, should it^pnss, would
place the banks and the Government in antago
nist relation to each other, which he consider*
as a very weighty objection to it. I again mutt
correct his statement. I made no such remark,
I indeed s&id, when the banks were connected
wi-hthe Government, they had a direct interest
in increasing its fiscal action. The greater the
revenue and expenditures, and the larger th*
sirphis, the greater would be their profit, but,
when they were separated, the reverse would
take place. That the greater amount of gold
and silver collected and withdrawn from circii^
lation the less would be left for banking opera
tions, nnd, of course, the less tlieir profit; and
that in one case they would be the allies, am!,
in the other, the opponents of the Governmerif,
as far as fiscal action was concerned; or. to ex.
press it more concisely, when united with tho
Government, they would be on the side of the
tax.consumers, nnd, when separated, on that of
the tax payers. Such were my remarks; and
I now ask, is it not true? Can any one deny ht-
Or admitting its truth, can its importance
disputed? Were there no other reasons in
vor ol the bill, I would consider this of itself
decisive. It would be almost impossible to pre
serve our free institutions, with the weight ©f
the entire banking system thrown on the side*
of high taxes and extravagant disbursements, or*
to destroy it if thrown into the opposite scale.
But the Senator regards the expression of
tax consumers and tax-payers as mere catch-
words, of dangerous import, and tending-to df*
vide society into the hostile partite of rich and*
poor. I lake a very different view.- 1 hol(f
that the fiscal action of the Government must-
necessarily divide llte community into the tww
sreat classes of tax-payc's and tax.cnnsnmerst
Taking taxation and dsbursentents logethviy
tnd it is unavoidable that one portion of thw
community mu>t pay into the Treasury, in th*
shape ol taxes, more than they receive back in
disbursements, and another must receive movw
than they joy. Ttils Is iho g'u.n j,.
principle in all Governments, especially tlaw*-
tliat are free, around which all other causea of
|)olitieal divisions and distractions finally rally.-
Were it otherwise, if the interest of every por
tion and class of ihe community was the samo
in reference to taxation and disbursements, noth--
ing would be more easy than lo establish and
preserve free institutions; but as it is, it is tho‘
most difficult of all tasks, as history and expe
rience prove. This principle of disorder liew
p in the nature of men and society; and ex<-
lends equally to private associations as to polit
ical communities. There will necessarily spring
up in both a stockholding and direction interestp
the latter of wltich, without wise provisions and
ocessaut vigilance, will absorb the former, of*
which the winding up ofmnny a bank will prove-
The two remaining arguments ofthe Senator
have been open asserted and as often minted;-'
and I shall despatch them with a few words. He>
tells us. as he has often done, that we are bountf
to regula'e the currency; and thiit the Constitu
tion has given to Congress the express power_
to regulate it; with many other expressions of
similar import. *lt i- manifest, that the whote
argument turns on the ambiguity of the word
currency. If, bv it, is meant the current coin 1
ofthe United States, no one can doubt that
Congress has the rig hr to regulate it. Tiie powesf
sexpressly given by the Constitution, which'
says, in so many words, that it shall have power
to coin money and regulate the value thereof;
but if it is intended to include bank notes, ad-
must be the intention ofthe Senator, there is no
such express power given in the Constitution.
It is a point to be proved, and not assumed, aoA
every attempt of the Senator to prove it has en'-*
ded in signal failure. He has- not, and cannot,-
meet th" answer which he received from the'
Senator from Pennsylvania at tlie extra session}
and Ins repetition of the assertion, after so de-»
cistve an answerserves but to prove how mnch>
more easy it often is to refute an argument thaw
to silence him who advanced it. But I do not
despair even of silencing the Senator. There'
is one whose authority on this point I amssrat
he must respect; 1 mean himself. \Vhen fhtf"
bill granting a charter to the late United Stated-
Bank was under discussion in the other Houao,-
in 1816, he then took the opposite side, and ar
gued with great force, against the very right for’
which he now so obstinately contends. He then*
maintained that the framers ofthe Constitution'
were hard money men; that currency meant the'
current coin ofthe United States; and that Con--
gress itad no right to make any other. But tho*
Senator shall speak for himself; an thnt he may
be heard in his own words, I shall read an tt~--
tract from his speech delivered at the tirtr.
“Mr. YVebs'er first addressed the Hoase. tie'
regretted the manner in which this debate hat#
been commenced, on a detached feature of the'
J>ill, and not a question affecting the principle: 1
and expressed his fears that a week or t wo would*
be lost in the discussion of this question, to no‘
purpose, inasmuch as it might ultimately endin'
the rejection ofthe bill. He proceeded lo reply
to the arguments of the advocates of the bill, it
was a mistaken idea, he said, which he had 1
heard uttered on this subject, that we were about
to reform the National currency. No nat on had
a better currency, he said, than the United States;
there was no nation which had guarded its cur
rency with more care; for the flamers of the*
Constitution, anti those who enacted the early
statutes on this subject, were hard money men;
they had fi-lt, and thetefore duly appreciated the
evils ot a paper medium; they therefore, sedu
lously guarded the curr-nnj of. the United
States from debasement. The. legal currency iff
the United States was gat'd and silver coin; this-
was a subj- c in regard to which Congress hadf
run into no folly.
“YVhat, then, he asked, was the present eviff
Having a perfectly sound national currency, and
the Government haring no power in fact to make
any thing eDe current but gold and silver, there
had grown up in different States a currency of
pap-T issued bv banks, setting mil with the prom--
iso to pav gold aod silver, which they bad been 1 -
wholly unable to redeem: the consequence was
that there was a inass of paper afloat, of perhaps^
fifty millions, winch sustained no immediate re
lation t > the legal ciirren y of the country—a pa
per which will not enable any man to pay money'
lie owes to his oetglibor, or his tlebts to the Go
vernment. The hanks had issued more money 1
than they could redeem, and tne evil was ae-
vcrelv felt, &c. Mr. VV. declined occupying
the time of the House to prove that there w«si
a depreciation of the paper in circulation: the
legal standard of value, was gold and silver; tbs'
relation of paper to it proved its st ite, and the -
rate of its depreciation. Gold and silver cur
rency. he. said, was the law of the land at home,-
and the lata of the world a'lroad; there could, ini
the present stale o' the world, be no other cur
rency. In consequence of the immense paper"
issues having banished specie from circulationt,
the Government had been obliged, in direct vio
lation of existing statutes, to receive tbe amount
of their taxes in something which was hot re
cognized bv iaw as the money of the country*
and which was, in fact, greatly depreciated, &c.*
This was the evil.”
YVhat can be more decisive? YVhat mow
pointed ? They are the very doctrines which he"
is in the daily habit of denouncing under the name
of Loco-foco. The Senator may hereafter be
regarded as the father of the party; and I deem
it not a little unnatural that he should be so harab
and cruel to his oflspring.
But it may be said, that I then advocated tbtf
opposite side. Be it so, and it follows tiiat hi*
authority nnd mine stand as opposing qualities
on the opposite sides of an equation; and I feel
confident that the Senator will readily admit th*l
his wil at least be sufficient to destroy miner
I readily a.’knowledge thnt my opinion* afief
the lapse of upwards ot twenty years, With the
light which experience in this long period ha*
shed on the banking system, has undergone con
siderable changes. It would be strange if it had
not. I see more clearly now, than ! did, the
true character of the system and its dangerou*
tendency; but I owe it to mvself and the truth
of the cause, tossy I was, even at that period,
far from being its advocate, and would then
have been opposed to thetystem had n
