Newspaper Page Text
VOL. 4.
THE WEEKLY
Cartersville Express
Is published every T’TTT-'li-iT") A~Y~
morning, in Cartersville, Harlow County, Ga.,
by
Smith & Milam,
Proprietors, at Ffllir Dollars, per an
num, strictly in advance ; fwo Hollars tor
Six Months; One Hollar for Three Months.
Advertisements for one month, or less time
fine jJoii.lT per square, {of ten lines or less,)
for each insertion ; all other advertisements
will he charted Fifty per cent on old prices.
10,000 Lbs- Clean Linen and
Cotton Rags wanted at this office, for which
5 Cents per pound will he paid in Subscription
for thu Cartersville Express, or 3 cents in cash
Bring on your Rugs.
l'ire-wooil,
OR4TEN AND DirY. JMgfc
XT 7" ILL he furnished at all sea
y V sons, at the lowest market
price. Apply at J. A. Erwin & Co’s
, hi to re, or to JOHN J. HOWARD.
Cartersville, Jan. 1, ’6G. ly
JAMES MILNER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
CARTERSVILLE, OA.
Will practice in the Courts of the Cherokee
U i\e Ridge Circuits. Prompt attention
given to all business entrusted to his care.—
Olfire over J.oewenstein Sl Pfeifer’s store.
Jan. r, ISCfi. ly
W. H. PRITCHETT,
Attorney at Law.
CARTERSVILLE, GEORGIA.
PRACTICES- Law in all the eourts of the
Cherokee circuit and counties adjoining
Bartow. Jan 23.
JERE A. HOWARD,
ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW.
CaRTERSVILLE, GA.
HENRY P. FARROW,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
Atlanta, Ga.
W II.I. give his entire attention to
the practice of liis proffession,
uni! will always he found in his
office during hus'iiess hours.
Office on Whitehall street over Holbrook’s
Hat Storo. Jan 30.
1. 11. HAM.SAI 11, T. H. IIA KKIt
DR3. RAMSA'JR & BAKER,
# profes ional services to the public
\Jt 1 generally. May he found at their
AsTO DRUG STORE.
Cirtersville. Jan. 1, 1806. |v
DR. W. L. KIRKPATRICK,
DR. W. W. LEK,
DfU. A. THOMAS,
! ) KslMil'ri'l 1.1. Y tender their pro
k, Cession i! services lo the people of yy
< urtcrsville and surrounding country.— Ok
\. it. -DR. KIRKPATRICK will devote him
self specially to li e of Fe
lll I It'S. Wiil he found at the thug store of
W. 1.. Kirkpatrick & Cos.
Jan I, lstill, ly
DR. G. G. ROY,
Formerly ol Atlanta, (lit.,
/'VKI'KIId his P oil - .'. .ion.il services to j
\ J the people of Cartersvtlle and sur
roun ling e untry. ti.
He eau h.‘ found at the HUFF PLACE, be
tween Allnlonnu and C irtersville. He will
pi espceial attention to Surgery and the Uis
vaoesol w.mtru ami children.
Jan. 7. 18*0
DR - D - hamiterT -
WgY xm STILL tenders his professional ser
xfed & vices to the citizens of Cartersville
ami surrounding country. Past services will
suffice for a reroounnondatiou as to his proliei
t'ney.ui tlte practice of his profession. He
can ho found at the Drug Htore of Rantsaur At
Baker, when not professionally engaged.
Jan 1. I sod. ly
RICHARD MALTBIE,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
Curterni'illr, Ga.
VTTII.I. attend promptly to all business en-
B trusted to his care. Particular attention
yiv,a ito the collection of claims and winding
up estates. Jan l.titi. Iv
N. G. HILBURnT"
G, llrlt'k aii.l Stone Jlution,
JS
• i Cartersville, Ga,
i\
Is prepared to do nnv kind of work in hia
line, m a neat and durable manner, at short
notice. llis work recoommends itself.
Jail, l.titi. ly
5S ii r eolla ncl
mechanical Dentist.
rpiU'. umlcrsiittieJ respectfully offer hi* pro
| frssioual service* to the c>ti*en* of Car
tersvi lie ami vicinity. He i prepared
to do all hind* ol' r work belonging
fo hia pn>flf**ioh. Fall nett* of
teeth put in on gold plate. Work all war
ranted. F. M. JOHNSON,
t'or lewville, Feh. 13, 6m°
Dentistry.
.. . : <B9
lit*. J. \V. Kr.Nxr.itY,
F.sl ‘BV rn i.I.V informs hi* old patron*
*>u I all other* who may i*h his service*,
hat he will, occasionally, visit Carle r*villc. —
All oeder,- left at rh* lime Store of W. 1,.
Kirk pair i k A Cos.. for him. will In? promptly
attended ‘ Keter* to hia numerous patron*
ui the coui itry. Feh. 20
A k WATCHES, CLOCKS,
CwdjJ jfudlrt, W
Jtvet Rt pairc* S'
\VM. R. MOI NTCABTLE.
>f- C*, - Jut l> 1
THE WEEKLY EARTERSVILLE EXPRESS.
J. H. SATTERFIELD & B R 0,.
Dealers in
Dry-Goods,
AND
COUNTRY PRO DUG E.
CARTERSVILLE, GEORGIA.
BACON, hog round, a very superior lot on
hand and foLsale at living prices, by
J. H. SATTERFIELD & BRO.
LARD, very superior article LEAF LARD
just opened and for sale, at
SATTERFIELD’S.
SUGAR AND COFFEE, a fine lot, for sale
at SATTERFIELD’S.
FLOUR, a superior article, on hand for pale
at SATTERFIELD'S.
CORN MEAL, Fresh, kept, constantly on
hand and for sale, at SATTERFIELD'S,
DRY-GOODS, neccessary for this market,
a carefully selected stock , on hand for sale
at SATTERFIELD'S.
GROCERIES, of all sorts, on hand for sale
at SATTERFIELD'S.
CONFECTIONARIES, a fine assortment,
for sale at SATTERFIELD'S
COUNTRY PRODUCE, bought and sold,
by J. H. SATTERFIELD & BRO.
Cartersville, March 5.
j atsetg aaag aagia aisgig
JOHN & JOE HARWUL. 3pj
Gunsmiths.
yjj
Are now prepared to do any
kind of work usually done in
a gunnery.
BUBHING, Boreing and Rifling Barrel,
Maxing or mer ding Lock,
Making or mending .Stock,
Making or mending Barrel,
In fact, Making or Mending 1.04'1i. Stock
ami llurrel. We can do this and a
great deal more. Only try us.
JHKS. S. C. liOI LUS.IIITII^
Formerly of Caosville, Ga.,
■TiFT-r i WILL open a
*cf tlusir S< liool’,
J 3 V J !l on MONDAY, the VVS. 'fjl)
llth inst., and solicits the patronage of the
citizens of Oartersville and vicinity. From
long experience as a Teacher of Music, she
feels rontident of giving entire satisfaction to
all. For terms apply at the residence of Mrs.
Lou. S. Milner.
Cartersville, March 5, 18C.fi.
Boots, Shoes, Harness, &c.
Made to Order,
Hy
GEO. Hi. FRANKS,
EUHARLEE, GA.
HE challenges competition, especially in
point of neatness and durability of wurK.
He needs no other recommendation, where he
is known, than his work. Give him one fair
trial, and you will be sure to patronize him
ever afterwards. March 5.
Lumber.
BEAUTIFUL, even and true.—
Yellow Pine, Poplar, or Oak, at the low
est prire, delivered in Cartersville. Give us a
call and we will suit you. Orders left with
Messrs. J, Elsas A Cos., will meet with prompt
attention. BLIGH, BRO. & RICHARD.
Carteravilllc, March 13,1866. 3m
& EO & HARP| SRWHOLESALE$ R
WHOLESALE DEALER IN
Imported Whisky,
Mines,
§niubies,
liquors.
In Store, ami for Sale at Lowest Price*,
25 BUI*. Bond'* OKI Bourbon Whisky,
25 “ New Whisky,
25 “ Robinson County,
20 J Pipe* Cognac Brandy.
5 Bid*. Holland Gin,
5 Bids. Premium Rose Bourbon,
15 Bbl*. Jim Crow,
10 Bbl*. Cheap Neotor Whisky,
50 Cases Champagnes,
20 Cases Clarett. also a general assort
ment of Sherry. Maderia. Port and Catawba.
All of which I will sell at the lowest prices.
Al**. 100,000 Assorted Cigars.
Large or small orders tided with dispatch,
and goods warranted as represented.
Atlanta, April 3. 3ai
CARTERSVILLE, GA, APRIL 24, 1800.
J. A. Erwin & Cos,
DEALERS IN
Dry- Goods ,
CLOTHING,
HATS
jgp-ywj BOOTS 4* SHOES ,
•ThVW n Hardware,
CUTLERY,
GROCERIES, PROVISIONS, &C
ALL KINDS OF
COUNTRY PRODUCE
JBougkt and Sold.
Cartersville, Ga., Jan 1, 1866.
W.W. RICH.
/•
Having purchased the stock of Goods it the
old stand of T. 91. C onipiOll &
CO., takes this method to in
form the Public that he in
tends to ke-p on hand
all the time,'
the very best
stock
of
DRY GOODS,
AND
gROCERIES.
the market affords. Will be
sold reasonable.
Will give Goods
In Exchange for
all kinds of
Country Produce
Call and see him before urchasing elsewhere.
Cartersville. Jan 30.
CURRY & KNIGHT,
C3- IR, O C E IR, S ,
and
commission
mere h a uts,
No. 2, Gilmer Street,
Cartersville. Ga
KEEP constantly on hand and for sale
at low figures, Sugar, Col Tee, mackerel
cheese, bacon, lard, salt, tobacco, soda, ginger
pepper, spice, copperas, madder, soaps, match
es, Stationery. . Cotton yarns
Boots and Shoes,
Hi-ts, Caps,
Hardware and Cutlery,
Tin Ware, Flour and Meal,
Tea, Starch,
and many other things too tedious to mention
Grind Stones; also,
500 Bushels Fresh Cotton Seed.
Clover Seed, etc.
Jan. 1, 1806.
NEW SKIRT FOR 1865-6.
The great I mention of the age
HOOF SHZIHLTS.
J. W. BRADLEY'S New Patent DUPLEX
ELLIPTIC [or double] SPRING SKIRT.
f lAHIS INVENTION consists of Dcplix (or
1 two) Elliptic Pens RkfinkdSteelSpkinus,
ingeniously Braided tightly and firmly togeth
er, Rous to ku<;k, making the tocchest, most
FLEXIBLE, ELASTIC and DURABLE SPRING ever U
sed. They seldom bend or break, like the sin
gle Spring, and consequently preserve their jkt
feet and beautiful shape, more than twice as
long as any Single Spring Skirt that ever has
or can be made.
THE' wonderful flexibility and great com
fort and pleasure to any Lady wearing the Du
plex Elliptic Skiit will be experienced particu
larly in all crowd'd Assemblies, Operas, Car
riages, Railroad Cars, Church Pews, Arm
Chairs, for Promenade and House Dress, as the
Skirt can be folded when in use to occupy a
small place as easily and conveniently as a
Silk or Muslin Dress.
A Lady haying enjoyed the Pleasure, Com
fort and Great Convenience of wearing the Du
plex E liptic Steel Spring Skirt for a single
day will never afterwards willingly dispense
with their use. For Children, Misses and
Young Ladies they are superior to all others-
THE HOOPS are covered with 2 ply double
twisted thread and will wear twice as long as
the Single yarn covering which is used ou all
Single Steel Hoop Skirts. The :hree bottom
rods on every Skirt are also Double Steele, auc
twice ordouble covered to prevent the covering
from wearing off the rods when dragging dowi
stairs, stone steps, etc-, etc. which they art
constantly subject to when in use.
All are made of the new and elegant Cordeo
Tapes, and are the best quality in every part
giving to the wearer the most graceful anil por
ted Shape possible, and are unquestionably
the lightest, most desirable, comfortable and
economical Skirt ever made.
WESTS' BRADLEY & CARY. PROPRIETORS of
the Invention, and SOLE MANUGACTURERS. 97
CHAMBERS, and 7 & 81 READE STREETS, NEW
YORK
FOR SALE in all first-class Stores in this
City, and throughout the United States and
Canada. Havana de Cuba, Mexico, South A
menca, and the West Indies.
Enquire lor the Duplex Elliptic (or
double) Spring Skirt. A. 4‘ C.
April 3,1866. ~ 3a\M
Still Ahead l
LOEWEWSTEIN & PFEIFER
Are now prepared to supply
Farmers
IN
HARDWARE,
>
Groceries,
DRY-GOODS,
and all other styles of goods necessary for
Plantation uss
We now offer at
Reduced prices ,
All Gcx>ds on Hand, and promise to sell with
LESS PROFIT, AND PAY MORE FOR
country produce
than any other house in town.
Particular attention paid to the
Shipment ofCottou on
COMMISSION.
Our stock consists, in part, of •
Groceries, Hardware, Crockery IV are,
Clothing, Boots, Shoes,
flats, i)*c., S,-c. New Brick Corner.
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
Jinna.y j- lS6.fi,
v. r.. tommy, ’. j. 8. stfwart, ; Prof. a. 3. orb
Formerly of; of Oxford, Ga. ; ofOxford, G.
Columbus, Ga.
Tommy, Stcwurt Sc Orr,
HARDWARE & COMMISSION
MERCHANTS,
Keystone Building, Whitehall Street,
Atlanta, ga.
KEEP constantly on band all kinds of
Jlardwar'. Iron, Steel, Nails, Grain Cra
dles, also Carrage and Wagon Materials, Har
ness Leather, uid Rubber Belling.
April 3. \v3m
E. Steadman, J. R. Simmons. L.J\ Thomas
STEADMAN. SIMMONS & CO..
Wholesale Grocers
AND
COM MI S SlO M MERCHANTS
Norcross Building.corner Whitehall and Mari
etta streets,
ATLANTA, GEORGIA.
Keep constantly on hand a large stock of
Groceries,
Provisions, •*
U ape,
Bagging,
Colton Yarns, etc.
to which wc invite the attention of dealers aEd
others. Feb. 6i—dm
FIRE INSURANCE' AGENCY
POLICIES issued promptly by the under
signed, for the following companies :
"UNDERWRITERS AGENCY," binding Four Com
panies in one policy, New \ Oi k,
HOME INTURANCE COMPANY, Savannah.
SO. MUTUAL INSURANCE CO. Alliens,
HOME INSURANCE CGMPANY, Columbus.
VALLEY INSURANCE CO. Winchester, > a.
COLUM3IA INSURANCE CO. Aew lork.
MARINE FIRE INSURANCE CO. X. Orleans.
Policies against the perils of trans
portation- Also, Lua Insurance and Ac
cident Insurance. ,
Can be found at Woff.rO A Parrotts Law
Office. JXO. W. WOFFORD,
Cartersville, Jan 1, IS6B. Agent.
Circular Saw Mills,
AND STATIONARY AND
Portable Engines.
-dT7'E are very largely engaged in the in m-
W ufacture ofthe above Machinery. Our
Mills are the first Premium Mills of the great
f>tatcs of Ohio. Indiana an i Illinois, i hose
wishing to purchase address us for price and
description at Hamilton. Butler County. Ohio.
\Ys are hut twenty-five mil. s from Cincinnati.
OWENS. LANE, DYER & CO.
Apr 10. 3ta
A Setting Hen.
WHAT IT COST TO ATTEMPT BREAKING
VP HER BROODING.
“Timothy, that air ynller hen’s set
tin’ agin,” said Mrs. Hayes to her son,
one morning at bre a klast.
“Well, lei her set,” remarked Tim
othy, helping himself to a btige piece
of cheese, “1 reckon I can stand it as
long as she can.”
“i do wish you would try to be a
little more etjuinomical ofeheese, Tim
othy; I’ve cut the very last of my every
day lot, and it’s only the first of May.
And now, as soon as you've done eat
ing I want you to go out and break
up that hen. SSlie’s sell in’on an old
ax and two bricks now.”
“1 hope she’ll hatch cm,” returned
Timothy.
“If she was set now she’d hatch the
fourth week in May. It’s a bad sign;
something alters happens alter it.—
Stop gigling, Helen Maria; by the time
you get to be as old as yer uia ve’lt
see further than you do now. There
was J'elining’s lolks, their grey top
knot hatched the last week in May,
and Miss Jennings, site had the oon
jnetton on the lungs, and would have
died if they hadn’t killed a lamb and
wrapped her in the hide while it’s
warm. That was all that saved her.”
With such a startling proof of the
truth ol the omen before linn Timothy
finished his breakfast in haste and de
parted for the barn, from which he soon
returned bearing the squalling biddy by
the legs.
“Wljjttshall I do with her, mother?
She’llget on again,and she’s as cross as
cross as bedlam; she shined my hand's,
and would be the death of. me if she
could get loose-”
“I’ve hear'n said that it was a good
plan to throw ’em up in the air,” said
Mrs. Hayes. “Aunt Peggy broke one
of setting only three times try in’.—
Spose’n you try it.”
“Up she goes, head or tail!” cried
Timothy, as lie tossed the volcano sky
wards.
“Land-a-massy!” exclaimed Mrs. 11.
“she’s coming down into the pan bread
that I set out on the great rock to rise !
Tim, ’lis strange that you can't do
nothing without overdoing it ”
“Down with Lite traitors, tip with
the stars,” sung out Tim, elevating
biddy again with something loss than a
pint of hatter hanging to her feet.
“Good gracious uk ! wussant! wuss,”
cried . Mrs. ILvym, and Tim agreed
with her; for the hen iiad come down
on the well polished tile of Squire Ben
nett, w ho happened to he passing; and
the dignilied old gentleman was the
father oj’Cyntiiia Bennett, tlte young
lady with whom Tim was seriously
enamored.
The squirt* looked daggers, brushed
oil’the dough with his handkerchief,
and strode on in silence.
“Yes, hut it’s going up again,” said
Tim, spitefully, seizing the clucking
biped and tossing hot at random into
tße air. Biddy thought it time to man
liest her individuality, and with a loud
scream she darted against the parlor
window, broke through, knocked down
the canary cage, and landed plump in
the silken lap of Mrs. Gray, who was
boarding at the farm house.
Mrs. Gray screamed with horror,
and, starting up, dislodged biddy, who
dew at her reflection in the looking
glass with an angry hiss. The glass
was shattered, and down cante the hen,
astonished above measure, against a
vase of flowers, which tipst t, and in
falling knocked over the stand dish and
deluged with ink and water u pair of
slippers, which Helen Maria was tin
broidcring ler her Inver, >];■. J;,mcs
lienshaw,
Helen entered the room just ns the
mischief had been dime, ami viewing
the ruin, she at once laid it to her broth
er Timothy. She heard his step be*
hind her, and the unfortunate hen she
Huns full irt his face.
There was a smothered oath, and
the hen came back with the force of a
twelve pound shot.
Helen was mad. Her ryes were
nearly put out with the feathery dust
and dough, and she went at Timothy
with true feminine zeal. She broke
bis watoliguard into a dozen pieces,
crushed his dickey and began to pull
bis whiskers out by the roots when site
suddenly' remembered that Timothy
had no whiskers to pullout by the
roots.
But when site came to look closer
she perceived that the man she had
nearly annihilated was not Timothy
but James Renshaw.
Boot Helen burst into tears and lied
into her chamber, the usual refuge for
heroines: and James alter Washing his
face at the kitchen sink, went home
sternly resolved never to marrv a wo
man with such a temper as Helen
Hayes had.
The lien, meanwhile, who is onr
heroine, returned to the barn to estab
lish herself on the ruins of onr nest,
sullenly determined to set if the heav
ens fell.
.Mrs. Hayes soon discovered her, and
having heard that dipping in water,
would cure “broodiness,” she set foriii
for the brook with the fowl iu her
apron.
Mrs. Weaver, and old lady of very
quarrelsome temperament, who resided
near, and was at sword’s point with
Mrs. Hayes, was just coming to the
brook lor a pail of water, and spied the
yellow bead of the bird peeping ot from
Airs. Haves’ apron.
j “There 1” she exclaimed, “now I’ve
found out what puzzled me to death
nigh about a week. I’ve found out
where that yellow pullet had gone to.
Mi's. Hayes, 1 alters kuowed you was
a wicked, desateful woman, but I didn’t
think you’d steal.”
“Steal? me steal! who are you talk
ing to, Mrs. Weaver ?” said Mrs.
Hayes, on Iter dignity.
“I’m talking to you madam, that’s
who Tm talking to ! You’ve stole my
hen tliat I got over to Uncle Gillies’
and paid for in sassengers. She’s a
real Dorking. Give Iter to m? right
here, or I’ll use force ?”
“Site’s my lien, and you touch her
if you dare!”
“I'll show you what I dare,” yelled
Mrs. Weaver, growing purple and seiz
ing the fowl by.the tail, she gave a
wrench, and the tail came out in her.
hand.
The sudden cessation of resistance
upset Mrs. Weaver’s balance, and site
lei 1 backward into the brook, splatter
ing the mud and astonished poliywogs
in every direction.
Site was a spry woman, and was
soon on her feet ready to renew the
assault.
“Give tne rny hen !” she cried, thrust
ing her fist into Mrs. Hayes’ face,
“you old hag and hypocrite, you !”
and she made a second dive at the bird.
The hen thought it time to show het
colors; and uttering an u.neurhly. yell,
she flew out of the covert square into
the face.of Mrs. Weaver, which site
raked down, with her nails until it re
sembled the pages of a ledger, crossed
and re-crossed with red ink.
Mrs. Hayes caught a stick of brush
wood from the fence —Mis. Weaver
did the same, and a regular duel would
probably have been fought if the bank
of the creek had not suddenly given
way and precipitated both the indig
nant women into the water.
They scrambled out on opposite
sides, and the ben sal perched on an
apple tree and cackled in triumph.
The ladies shook themselves, and
by consent went home. They have
not spoken since.
The hen disappeared, and was not
seen unlit three weeks afterwards, when
she made her appearance with eleven
nice v i.11.m . ‘lickens. Im lound some
other fowl’s nest, and had set in suite
of litte.
But although not “broken yp” her
self, she broke up two matches —for
Cynthia Bennett was not at home the
next time Timothy called, and Air.
Ileushaw never forgave Helen for hav
ing such a temper.
A Sister.
He who has never known a sister’s
kind ministrations, nor felt It is heart
warming beneath her endearing smile
and love-beaming'eye, has been unfor
tunate indeed. It is not to he wonder
ed at if the fountains of pure feeling
flow in his bosom more sluggishly, or
if ilio gentler emotions of his nature he
lost in the sterner attributes of man
hood.
That man has grown up among kind
and affectionate sisters. “I once heard
a lady of much observation and expe
rience remark.
“And why do you think so?” said I.
“Because of the rich development of
all the tenderer and more defined feel
ing of the heart, which is so apparent
in every action, in eve;"' wnnl_”
A sister’s influence is felt even in
manhood’s later years, and the heart
of him who lias grown cold in his chil
ling contact with the world, will warm
and thrill with pure enjoyment, as
some incident awakens within hint the
soft tones and glad melodies of his sis
ter’s voice. And he will turn from pur
poses which a warped and false philos
ophy has teasoned into excellency,
and even weep lor the gentle influences
which moved him in his earlier years.
— \_Mt,eor.
Impeachmentot'llic President.
The impeachment of the President,
long confidently whispered as one of
the leading schemes of the Radicals,
says tin? Allantsrora, is now openly
advocated bv leading Radicals, both in
Congress and out of it. These lead
ing newepaper.s of the Radical school —
journals which had been long regarded
as authority in the party which tin y
represent It ive come out boldly and
announced the purpose of Congress to
impeach the President.
A Washington dispatch of the Gth
stales that the President lias been in
formed of the purpose of tiie Radicals
to attempt his impeachment, and that
he is now daily expecting the event,
and is fully prepared to meet the exi
gences of the occasion.
The country will understand, when
it is perhaps 100 late, that the impeach
ment of the President will inaugerate a
civil war which will be fought not in the
desolate South or the distant West, but
in New England, beginning in Wash
ington.
Do not yield lo misfortunes, but re
sist them with unceasing firmness. '
NO. 42.
Who Killed Abel?—Mr. Lindsay
told a good story at the Sunday school
celebration at the Methodist church in
Charloltsville the other day. He said
that the following occurred at Sunday
school at the University of Virginia re
cently between a teacher and anew
scholar:
Teacher—My little boy, can you tell
me who killed Abel ?
Scholar—Yes, ma’am.
Teacher—Well, now. my little dear,
do not he afraid —who killed Abel?
Scholar—The Yankees/
Teacher—Oh no, Johnny, we are
not talking about that; do you not know
who killed Abel ?
Scholar instated it was the Yankees.
Teacher—No, my son :
Abel. Now remember, think of sugar®
cane; I am going to hsk you shout in
next Sunday. Think of sugar-cane. 1
Next Sunday the boy was attacked
again.
Teacher—Well, Johnny, you know
to-day who killed Abel ?
Boy—Oh yes, ma’am, must I tel! ?
Teaclier—Yes, my dear; who killed
Abel?
Boy—Sorghum.
—[ dm rlollsville Courier.
In a recent speecli at Knoxville, Gov.
Biownlow said:
“President Johnson can’t carry a sin
gle State Nortli of Mason’s line but
Kentucky, and I wish he would car
ry that State to “hell.”
From which the universal inference
is that the “Governor” is anxious to
make Kentucky his future State.”
When you find a man doing more
business than you are, look at the ad
vertisements he has in the newspaper.
The business man who puts his sign
in the newspapers does a much wiser
tiling than when he fastens it over the
store, and who would think of neglec
ting that? The man* who advertises
informs the public that he wants trade,
and his card is in the newspapers.—
No matter how well a business
man is known, lie can always get new
customers if he will take tlie pains to
advertise; for hy neglecting the means
of securing trade it looses the best of
his profits.”
“Miss Brown, 1 have been to learn
how to tel! fortunes,” said a young mail
to a brisk brunette. Just give me your
baud, if you please,” “La, Mr. White,
how very rudi n you are ? Well go
and ask Pa.”
■
“Pat,” said a Judge to his neighbor
in a sleeping car, “ you would have
remained a long time in the (.Id coun
try before you could have slept with a
Judge.” “Yes, yer honor, and je’d
av bin a long time in the ouid country
before ye’d bin a Judge.”
Two young gentlemen.rivals, called
the same evening upon the object of
their affections. “John,” said the one
who came in last, and who had an um
brella in his hand, “K 1 come here a
gain and find you here; I’ll run this
umbrella through you—and spread it.”
lniiixcnise Steward.
We find the following published in the
New llaveu (Conn.) Register:
$ 100,000,000 RE WARD—LOST— A BURE ATT.
The sole property of a poor freed*,
man, who is inconsiderable. Said bu
reau contained six drawers, in which
were deposited the following valuable
amides viz :
No. 1. 32.000.00 ft ”"i ! cs of public.
■ and and confiscated estates, some of
which is very valuable for raising Sea
Island cotton.
No. 2. Daily rations for 1700 freed
tned for ten years with privilege of re
moval.
No. 3. Clothing outfit for the same
No. of freedmen, of the best qu dity. ; ml
got up without cost: including the tooth
combs, sozodont and night blooming
ctreus.
No. 4. 1700 first class residences for
freedmen—Government pattern, with
all the modern improvements.
No. i). 400,000 colleges, schools,,
churches, (orthodox.) hospitals, alms
houses ect., all in the highest style of
the art.
Mo. G. Government commissions for
973,000 salaried agents to superintend
i lie disposition of the above property. —
Those commissions are very valuable,
and eagerly sought for, as the etnolu
ments are lucrative, the perquisites a
bundnnt, the duties very light and char
acter no object.
Tbe last seen of the Bureau, it was in
the hands of the reprvsenative of the
people, who is supposed to have it in
his breeches pocket. Any information
which will lead to the ‘impeachment
and conviction of this audacious usurp
er, hy which the Bureau may he recov
ered, will be rewarded as above by
Stevens, Sumner, et al.
sCS=*Let it be remembered,
That the subscription of some of our
readers has expired, and if they wisli
their papers continued, they will please
call and renew it. Three months of
the year is gone, the time for w hicblhey
paid.