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CONFEDERATE ECONOMY.
ilrt H P. I fan dii, in Philadelphia Hmei.
live col tee. with tlio coffee lett out,
was the Confederate breakfast drink,
find when sweetened with sorghum
was a dose to be remembered. Cane
sugar, though it brought high prices
and was regarded as a luxury in the
last days of the Confederacy, was always
to be had in plenty for those who could
buy it. Sorghum, however, was the
•• sweetening” best known and cheapest
in Confederate times. Every planter
cultivated it, every owner of even a few
acres had at least one of those acres set j
in sorghmn cane. Housekeepers rung
the changes on it in every possible form,
sorghum cake, sorghum pudding with
sorghum sauce, sorghum pies—all tlies' i
and more were on their hills of fare.
Preserves were put up with it, and the !
svmp itself was a standard article of
food on most Southern t ables. Indeed
it is scarcely too much to say that the
hardy Chinese sugar-cane was one of
the pillars of the Confederacy, inasmuch
as it became a staple article of food at a
time when food was scarce and famine
seemed to draw near. The list of re
cipes in a Confederate cookery book
reads oddlj' enough. “ Yeast from dried
apples,” “ ditto from life everlasting,”
“ calves' foot jelly without wine or lem
ons,” brandy and vinegar being the
substitutes; “ hard candles without
wax,” and“. Confederate gum arabic,"
which last was cherry glue dissolved in
vinegar, are among those which I re
member. Juvenile Confederates had
few sweetmeats or candies, and one of
our household trials was that we could
never coax sorghum into anylike like
talfy—a thick jelly-like syrup was the
nearest approach thereto of which it
was susceptible. Red pepper and mus
tard were made at, home in plenty from
home-grown mustard seed and cayenne
peppers. The mustard was beaten in a
inortar, or ground in a spice-mill with
comparative ease ; but the preparation
of the pepper was a trying time for the
household. First strung and dried in
the sun ; then to make sure dried again
in the oven, the pods were rubbed into
powder witli heavy wooden pestles in a
wooden trough, and run through a sieve.
This sufficed for ordinary purposes, but
for the castors the product was again
dried, pounded and sifted. The work
was done in an out-house by veiled wo
men, but a general atmosphere of
sneezing and weeping always accompa
nied the pepper making, Black pepper
—to be had only in small quantities—
rose steadily in price throughout the
war, until April, 186.*), it was sold for
three hundred dollars a pound, an
amount equal, at the scale afterward
fixed for Confederate money values, to
more than seven dollars in gold. * *
Ingenuity kept pace with necessity,
and Confederate women found time
gnd means to make many pretty trifles.
Rabbit, otter and muskrat-skin, tanned
at home, were home-made into sets of
furs which would not have done dis
credit to a skilled furrier. Exquisite
feather fans were manufactured from
white geese feathers, and the feather
flowers of the Brazilian nuns, aside from
their brilliant coloring, are scarcely
more brilliant then the snowy japoni
cas worn by a Confederate bride ; yet
they were the work ol a lady friend.
I hesran to fear I should not get them
done in time,” wrote the giver. “My
white Westphalia geese went bathing in
a mud-puddle, and got themselves so
dirty that they had to he washed and
penned up to dry before their leathers
could he used.” Fresh flowers were
more than scarce, and nearly all bonnet
trimmings, as well as the bonnets, were
home-made.
Straw flowers, straw cords and tassels,
ruches and rosettes of ravelled silk—
these were more common and less cost
ly than well made feather flowers. Alto
gether the women managed well enough
except with regard to their bonnets. In
total ignorance of the Parisian decree,
which with the rest of the world had re
duced these to a mere idea, they went
on steadily adding to the size ot theirs
until in 180.’). when the barrier of their
armies gave way, they stood revealed
in veritable sky-scrapers, huge coal
scuttle shaped bonnets, in which tneir
heads and faces were hurried. In truth,
however, their ingenuity was wonder
ful. Thev made everything they wore
gloves, hats and shoes (cloth shoes to
which the shoemaker added the soles)
as well as other articles usually of fem
inine manufacture. Straw plaiting be
came a favorite industry, dividing favor
with knitting, since both could be done
by a dim light, and artificial means of
illumination were scant and feeble. The
Southern pitch pine yielded its torches
in abundance, but its flickering blaze,
albeit bright and picturesque, is fear-
fully trying to the eyesight.
Tallow candles were articles of luxury
•which might he used in plenty only by
well-to-do fanners and wealthy con
tractors. Who invented the Confederate
candle history will probably never tell
us; but from Virginia to Texas it be
came a Southern institution gladdeh
ing the fireside of the Confederacy.
'Pli'is__the candle —was a long rope of
wax, about the thickness of an ordinary
lead pencil, wound on a wooden stand
or frame —the Confederate candlestick.
To make the dandle, beeswax and resin
(one part of resin to eight of wax) were
melted together, and a long strand of
candlewick was drawn three times
through the mixture. The rope was usu
ally a long one, as many hands as pos
sible being pressed into service for the
work. When finished the candle was
wound on the candlestick like yarn upon
a reel. The end left free was drawn
through a strip (of tin nailed for the
purpose on the tdp of the candlestick.
VOL. II—NO. IT.
w .
As the candle burned away the w’axen 1
rope was unwound, still fbllowing out I
the similtude of the reel of yarn. The
light was dim, hut clear and steady, and
near the candle was sufficient for all or
dinary purposes. The lighted candle
required watching, and it was unsafe to
leave it long with no one near.
It YVasnH the Toothache.
Detroit Free Preit.
In the ladies' waiting room at the
Central depot tlie other day were a
newly-marriod couple Atom Grass Lake;
They had been visitiug iu the city two
or three days, and were then ready to
go homo. They sat side by side, of
course, his arm around her waist and
and she leaning on his shoulder. A
long-waisted stranger from the East,
having sore eyes and a big heart,
walked in, saw them thus seated, and in
about a minute he u9kedof the husband :
“ lias that woman there got the tooth
ache?”
The husband looked up in surprise,
but made no answer. After two or
three minutes the long-waisted man
remarked :
“ ll' that woman has got, the tooth
ache I’ve got a bottle of peppermint in
my satchel here.”
The bride rolled her big white eyes
around, and the husband looked some
what embarrassed. The man from down
East unlocked his satchel, fumbled
among shirts and colars, and brought
up four ounces of peppermint essence,
lie uncorked it, touched the contents of
the bottle against his big red tongue,
and, handing it forward towards the
husband feelingly said:
“Just have her sop some on a rag
and rub her gooms with it. \\ e've
used it in our family for
The bride's eyes threw out sparks as
she lifted her head from its loving posi
tion, and striking at the bottle she
cried out:
“ Tuthache, you fulc ! If you don’t
know the difference ’tween true love
and the tuthache you’d better pick
grass with the geese !”
“Mv Lord!” gasped the man, and
he hurried out with his satchel in one
hand and the bottle in the other.
Clerical Anecdote.
The following is too good to be lost:
Many years ago, when as yet there
was but one church in the old town ol
Lynne, Connecticut, the people were
without a pastor. They hail been for a
long time destitute, and now were on
the point of making a unanimous call
for a very acceptable preacher, when a
cross-grained man, by theuameof Dorr,
began a violent opposition to the candi
date, rallied a party, and threatened to
defeat the settlement.
At a parish meeting, while the matter
was under discussion, a half-witted fel
low rose in the house, and said he want
ed to tell a dream that he had last night.
He thought he died, and went away
where the wicked people go, and as soon
as Satan saw him “he asked me where
I came from ?”
“ From Lvnne, in Connecticut," I
told him, right out.
“ Ah! and what are they doing in
Lynne?” he asked.
“ They are trying to settle a minister,
I said.
“Settle a minister!" he cried out. “I
must put a stop to that. Bring me my
boots; I must go to Lynne this very
night."
I then told him, as he was drawing on
his boots, that Mr. Dorr was opposing
the settlement, and very likely he would
prevent it altogether.
“My sarvent Dorr T exclaimed his
Majesty. “My mrvent Dorr! Here,
take my boots; if my sarvent Dorr is
at work, there is no need of my going
at all.”
This speech did the business. Mr.
Dorr made no further opposition ; the
minister was settled, but his opponent
carried the title “My sarvent Dorr ” to
the grave with him.
If there is a rainbow, it must be bom
in the storm ; if there is a deep and un
uttered joy it must be over him that
was lost and is found, was dead and is
alive again. May it not be that it will
be found at last, that in the wonderful
ways of the Infinite One, every sorrow,
every woe endured, will at fast create
deeper and more transporting joy
throughout all His dominions?
A Lowell (Mass.) firm sent a lot of
bills west for collection. The list came
back with the result noted against each
name, one being marked “dead.’" Three ,
months after the same bill got into a
new lot that was forwarded, and when
the list came back the name was marked
“ still dead.”
The old maxim, “Be chaste and
you’ll be happy, is contradicted point
blank by a Black Hills man, who was
chased ten miles recently by a party of
red-skins.
The .Free Prem mentions an innocent
Detroit boy, a doctor's son, who pointed
to the skull in the office of his father,
and earnestly asked, “ Did you kill
him, father?”
HARTWELL, GA M WEDNESDAY* DECEMBER 19, 1877.
Major Dee and the Yankee Chaplain.
Frankfort lVomn.
It was in the latter years of the war,
on a cold winter morning, Governor
Magoffin and Major Deo, having been
together at Frankfort, were reluctantly
leaving that most hospitable city. Some
how, they always teemed reluctant to
leave Frankfort enriv in the morning.
As thov entered together the two-liorao
linrrodshurg couch they observed as fel
low pnssehgers a rosy-checked, bright
eyed Anderson county lady, with a
chubby child in her arms, and oh !
abomination of desolations, along-faced,
black-haired, uniformed Yankee chap
lain. Major Dee was silent —the Gov
ernor held his cane to his upper lip.
Tho stage had hardly crossed the bridge
before the apostle of liberty, who evi
dently recognized the Governor but did
not the Major, began a truly loyal dis
course, always addressing Major Dee:
“ I think the rebellion ought to be
crushed by all means,” said the chap
lain. The Major is always prudent;
the Governor was of necessity in those
times cautious, and so they said nothing.
The apostle went on with a tirade
against rebels. Still no response or
comment from either the Governor or
Major Dec.
Finally, said the chaplain, addressing
Major Dee: “Don’t you think Abra
ham Lincoln the greatest man living? 1
ask you. sir.”
The Major aroused himself, and with
his usual “ ahem! ahem ! ” said : “ Yes,
sir; the only truly great man living.”
The Anderson county woman was horri
fied ; the Governor took his cane from
his mouth ; and the chaplain was all at
tention. “ Sir,” continued Major Dee,
“Abraham Lincoln did for his father
and mother Ac noblest thing ever a sou
did.” The chaplain's face beamed, the
Major grew pathetic. “ You may talk
of Joseph and all other sous, but 1 never
did for my father and mother what Mr.
Lincoln did for his.” The Major grew
earnest. “ Honor thy parents is a God
given command, and uobly and in such
a manner as no other man has done did
Mr. Lincoln honor his lather and mo
ther. Why, sir, it almost brings tears
to my eyes to think of it.” The Major
began in a narrative style: “Mercer
county is an old county ; Harrodsbnrg
is the oldest town in the State. The
Allins have always been clerks in Mer
cer, and old mau Allin told my father,
and mv father told me, that w hen Abra
ham Lincoln was only ton years old he
rode fourteen miles to Ilarrodsburg in
his shirt-tail —”
The Anderson county woman blushed.
“ I beg pardon, madam, but still he
was in his shirt-tail," continued the Ma
jor. “Oh, it was a noble act to do this
for his father and mother, aud him only
ten years old.”
The sighed. The chaplain’s
curious anxiety was painful. “ Well,
sir, Abe Lincoln rode up to the clerk
and handed him seven and sixpence,
aud it was noble in him, and —”
Here the chaplain’s anxiety was so
great he anticipated the Major, and he
exclaimed : “ Blessed boy, got from the
clerk a deed to the parental homestead 7’
“ Deed ? deed?” said the Major. “ Who
said anything about a deed? Whv, it
was better than any deed, sir. lie got
a license from the clerk for his father
and mother to marry, sir, and him only
ten years old. Now, don’t you think it
was the noblest act of his life? and it
was what neither you nor 1 ever did.
Did we, Bcriah ?”
The Anderson county woman lmd to
be helped out of the stage, for she was
in strong convulsions; and all this proves
that Harrodsbgrg is the oldest town in
Kentucky.
The Georgia election turned, as was
expected in the adoption of the new
constitution, in the choice of Atlanta as
the capital and in the selection of a
nearly unanimous democratic legisla
ture. The great fight, and it was in
deed a heated one, was on the capital
question, the choice being between j
Miiledgeviile, a sleepy old town that |
once sported the honor and can never ;
get over the loss of it, and the city of
Atlanta, which is by odds the most
wide-awake and progressive of southern
communities, besides being a railroad
centre. Miiledgeviile seems to have
been voted for by the bourbons as a 1
matter of bourbonism, just as they j
would have voted for Andrew Jackson
for president if he had been running in
1876, and for no more plausible reason
than that which the cfarpet-baggers did j
should be undone. The new constitu
tion that has been adopted is, upon
the whole, a good piece of work. Among i
its most important features are strict i
provisions against duelling, making
lobbying a crime and petty larceny
cause for disfranchisement, prohibiting
the State from rendering financial as
sistance to railroads, abolishing the
whipping post and imprisonment for
debt, making the sessions of the legis
lature biennial and increasing the facil
ities for free public education.—Phila
delphia Time , Ind.
The Chicago Time* thinks a bill ought
to be passed for the realeoholization of
! vrhiskr.
Another Lesson in Poetry.
Vwi Httv'keyt.
We lmve just received to-day from n
young man who wears side whiskers,
thin ones, and eye-glasses, the sweetest
little gem of a poem. There is only one
verso of it, but he says it is very seldom
that lie drops into poetry, and can only
write when the divine afflatus is on him.
We think the divine afflatus was ouhim
Yesterday, with both feet. Wo could
have wished that he lmd written more,
hut we are grateful for the one stanza he
did send, because it gives us some new
ideas on poetry making, and we are
always glad to get hold of anything that
will help us to get anew wrinkle on tho
old machine. But this young man
doesn't use a machine; the afflatus,
when it strikes him, just seems to make
it ooze out of him like perspiration, and
In' flings this stanza oil’as though he had
hreadied poetry all his life :
Fair, fair, it is beyond compare.
My Jennie with the brown, hrown hair;
My flower that blooms, that blooms among
The heathery prairies wide and long,
Methinks 1 hear her song, her song.
Nbw that is something like. When
we had occasion to lecture on this sub
iect. ljnpuy u the columns of this valua
ble /or sale everywhere, price
cents, the reader will remember that we
tinted that tho only difficulty was in j
filling in, not in finding the rhyme, for |
you could write the rhymes first, and j
then rush around and look tip the words
to go in the lines. But this young ge- i
nius has given us a hint that does away
with all that trouble. He is a “ white j
crow," he is. We could go rightonaud
finish his poem for him without an j
effort.
Where the soft, soft, soft moonlight glows.
I'll seek. seek, seek thy bow-wow-wower ;
Oh. fairest rose, rose, rose, rose. rose.
My lily How, flow, flow, flow, flower. i
Oft. oft, oft in the starlight beams
I'll hie, hie, hie to our trysting place
And linger in dre. dre, dre. dre. dreams
For the sight t ight tight of thy lovely face.
I may caw, caw, caw, raw. call thee mine,
With thy yell, yell, yellow gold-like hair;
And my eye, yi, yi, yi, eyes would shine
To see thee, my data, dam, damsel fair. '
Beally, what with one and another
modern improvement, it will soon be a
great deal easier to write poetry than
prose, and no man or woman of any
pretensions to genius orscliolarly attain
ment will ever clothe their thoughts in
any garb other than prose.
The Ufcipc for Prosperity.
Btming S'tut.
1. Let every youth be, taught some
useful art and be trained to industry
and thrift.
2. Let every young man lay aside
and keep sacredly in tact a certain
proportion of his earnings.
3. Let every one set out in life with
a fixed determination to engage in busi
ness for himself, and let him put this
determination into practice as early in
life as possible.
4. Begin in a small, safe way, and
extend your business as experience
shall teach you is advantageous.
5. Keep your own books and know
constantly what you are earning and
just where you stand.
0. Do not marry until in receipt of a
tolerable certain income—sufficient to
live on comfortably.
7. Never get into debt. A man who
owes nothing can never fail.
8. Let every man who is able buy a
farm upon which to bring up his sons.
It is on the farm that best men, moral
ly and intellectually, arc turned out.
!>. Bear in mind that your business
cannot be permanently prosperous un
less you share its advantages equally
with your customers. An all turkey,
all buzzard system of business can
never succeed in the long run. Both
parties to a transaction must be mutu
ally benefitted if trade is kept up.
jO. Experience has shown that n
scrimping policy with employees is not
the most profitable for the employer.
Live and let live is a better theory.
11. Never get your business so much
extended that you are driven to make
a part ner. If you engage in a part ner
ship at all, let it not be forced upon
you.
12. If you find yourself incompetent
to manage a business successfully, set
tle down contentedly to work lor wages,
do your best for your employer, make
his interests yours, and be certain to
live on your income. Every one is not
qualified by nature to manage success
fully, but as much real happiness is en
joyed in a salaried position as in any
other, if the individual be only frugal
and contented.
13. Don't seek political office.
14. Aim to be just and fair in all
your dealings, and cultivate a good rep
utation for paying promptly.
If these few rules were generally ob
served, we should have but little com
plaint of hard times.
“ How Firm a Foundation.”
The perseverance of the saints was
thus understood by an old woman of the
African persuasion in Lexington, Ga.
“Oldßhody” fell under grave suspi
cion of having stolen the fatted turkey,
and her oflemto was lightly passed over
iu consideration of her advanced years
and eminent abilities as a cook. She
was, moreover, a shouting professor and
conspicuous in the amen corner. Shortly
lifter wards she was bailed hy her former
master us she hobbled out of his gate on
her way to “ meetin'," Halloo, Rhodv,
you are going to church still, you old
hypocrite.” " Isir, Mars Swop, you
tink I gwinc to gih up my ’ligion fur
one ole turkey gobbler.”
Anecdote of Andrew Jackson.
When Andrew Jackson was a young
man attending court at Rogersville. Tonn.. I
he lived at a hotel famous for its good !
cheer. One day, as he sat on the piazza, a '
youth came riding along dressed in the i
pink of fashion, hts eyes fixed on vacancy, j
replying not to the salutes which it was I
the custom or the times for strangers to ‘
give to each other. At a glance Jackson
saw the fop, and. determined to play the
part of landlord. He welcomed the Nilent
stranger with distinguished politeness, and
the company about '.he lire made room for
him. But the automaton wa:: not to be
won by conversation. He walked up and
down the room contemplating his own
graces, and presently exclaimed, command->
'ingly. “Landlord, I want supper I"’ .
per was spread and the stately youth de
voured it. Then tic resumed his walk, an
swered not a word to tho remarks of the
fireside circle of lawyers and judges, nnd
Jackson grew more and more wrathful.
“ Landlord, I want to go to bed !" was the
next demand; and he added, “I want a
room to myself.” Jackson represented
that the house was full, and there was no
single room to be had ; the young fellow
was not to be moved. Jackson disappear
ed, ami shortly returned, announcing that
tho guest's room was ready. Tho two
went otT through the front door, all the
company following, and stopped—-at the
corn-crib, through tho cracks of which a
light was shining. “There’s your room,”
said Jackson. “Do you wisli to insult
me. sir?” “No insult at all, sir. You
vowed you would not sleep in a room witli
I any one. and demanded a room to your
j self. There it is. sir.” “ I vow I will not
! sleep there,” said tho dandy. “By the
j eternal, you shall 1" exclaimed Jackson,
and grabbing the youth, he sent him at
j one toss into the crib and locked tho door.
! And there he staid all night, and in the
I morning he was released and dismissed
break fastless by the impetuous Jackson,
j This is a tale related by ancient lady of
Rogcrsville.
Business Is Business^
A reporter of the local edition of the
Danbury Newt went to soe the young lady
lie was keeping company with, Sunday
evening. She met him at the door with a
colorless face.
“ Oh, Torn !” she cried in an agitated
voice, *' we have had such a scare ! Ma
was coming down stairs aud she caught
her foot iu the carpet and went the whole
length —’’
“ Hold on !’’ shouted the excited youth,
diving nervously into his hip pocket for
his note-hood, while he whipped out a
pencil from another recess. “ Now go on.
Matilda !go on’ hut ho cairn! For the
heaven's sake bo calm ! Kill her?"
•* Gracious, no !"
“Break her back? Crush her skull?
Be calm, be calm? For the sake of sci
ence, he calm!"
“ Why, Tom,” gasped the girl, frighten
ed by his impetuosity, “ it wasn’t serious.
It was ”
“ Wasn’t serious?” he gasped, in turn.
“I)o you mean to say she didn’t break
anything after all that fuss?”
••Why’ certainly not. She never hurt
herself a hit.”
“ Well, ejaculated the young man with
an expression of disgust on his face, as he
sadly restored the book ami pencil to their
places, “that's all a woman knows about
business.”
That Fetched Him.
Tn ono of the Western States a man was
brought into court on a charge of assault
and battery, presented by his wife, and
His Honor asked him why lie struck her.
“She called me a worthless, la/.y loafer,
but that wasn’t it.”
“ Wells'”
“ She said our who’e family weren't
tit for fish bait ; but 1 didn’t get mad at
that.”
“ What was it then?” . •
•* She shook her list under my nose, and
said I was too lazy to die. but I know’d
she was excited and I let that pass. She's
got a fearful temper, your Honor.”
“I wish to know if you had sufficient
cause for provocation,” said the Court.
“ 1 guess I had. Judge. She came close
up and spit in my face, and said I was
meaner than pizen; but I didn’t hit her
j for that.”
“What then?”
“ 1 know’d her temper, and I sot there
and whistled ‘ Hold the Fort” and I was
! hearing with her. when she turned round
and gin my coon dog the smashingest kick
—lifted him right out’n doors onter his
head. That fetched mo. Judge, if the.ro
had been forty lions and a camel in the
road, I’d have skinned her or died trying.”
WHOLE NO. 09.
HOW THE TURTLE HELD ON.
Keokuk IWlihilwn.
Gabc's boy was fishing the ot her day,
•\ud caught a turtle, one of the snapping
specie:*. Gabo himself had been skir
mishing around that day and hail picked
up a pup which hr thought looked like
it was astray, and brought it home and
placed it under a tub, turned Inittom
side up, for safe keeping. The hoy was
unaware of this and used the tub to
cover his turtle. In so doing the dog
escaped, and the boy was too frightened
to say anything about, it.
Peace reigned in the house that night,
and Gabe felt In a good humor next
morning, and invited the family out to
see the new dog, “ which,” said Gabe,
“ Ise gwinc to lam some tricks.” Mrs.
Gabe and Tilly went out eagerly, the
boy with fear and trembling.
“Now,” said Gabe, as they ap
proached the tub, " I’se gwinc to show
you uns a dog as am a dog; none o’
ver common critters, but a ginewine
black and tan, an’ he didu’t cost a
cent.”
Then he whistled nnd called, “ Y'er
Rover, yer Rover, come yer dog to yef
master,” just to encourage the pup ho
said, as he lifted the tub a piece from
the ground.
The dog didn't come and Gabe whis
tled again, while the kinks all straight
ened out of the hair of the boy, who
leaned up against the house waiting for
the explosion.
Gabe said ; “ What am de mattah
widiledog,” nnd.ran his hand in to
bring the pup out by the nap of tho
neck. He pawod around a while and
the boy just slid to the ground, and
with eyes as big as saucers and mouth
j extended, waited for developments.
They came just as Gabe said, "blast
r, dqg, what's de matter wid—” Just
iiffeit fiis hand came, in contact with the
snout of the turtle, “Oh de good inn’
oh goody grashes,” shrieked Gabe wild
ly as he upset the tub and suddenly
assumed nil upright position with tho
turtle attached to his finger. “Oh
bress de I/>rd ! take him off! take him
off!" And the more ho yelled the
tighter the turtle clung.
Gabe was thoroughly frightened and
iin considerable pain, lie was wild,
and stretching out Iris arm, after vainly
trying to shake the turtle loose, he
wheeled wildly round and round, the
arm outstretched, the turtle on the out
side of the circle. “Holy Ghos
ejaculated Gabe, pirouetting like a bal
) let <lancer. “Whoof! lemmego! Oh
goramighty ! Whoof 1 I'seadead nig
; ger for a fac\" and then his eye caught
sight of the boy, who couldn't stand it
longer, and was turning hand-spring
after hand-spring, butting his head
against the side of the house, slapping
his sides, and yelling between time*—
“ Oh, lordy, lordy, jest look at de ole
man. Oh ! bress de lamb, jes’ glance
at that turkle. Oh ! Yaw, yaw, y-a-w.
w-w,” —more hand-springs, more butt
ing the building and more doubling up.
The old woman and Tilly stood
transfixed with amazement, but as Gabo
saw the boy and made for him, the truth
! flashed upon their minds, and as the
two disappeared around the comer of
the house and reappeared at another
corner, and ran round and round, the
boy keeping his distance and the turtle
not needing whip and spur to keep up,
such a shout went up that the earth
trembled and the old lad v grew so weak
j that, she fell into the tub, and as it was
a tight fit she was held fast; hut sho
! handn’t lost her breath, and as the pur
{suer and pursued came in sight she
would kick up her heels, and yell, “ Go
lit ole man ; lay down to it boy, go in
i turtle—Oh l hi, hi. Oh! glory, jest
look at ’em. Tilly, Lan, lau, it better
j dan de eirkus.”
There never was such a din raised in
! t hat quarter of town. Gabe, yelled,
the boy yelled, the old woman and Til
ly laughed and the geese squawked. The
turtle was too busy to make any noise,
but it kept its end up in the race man
fullv, and just as the boy secured a po
sition on the roof and the old man fell
exhausted on the door step, it saw a
good chance, let go all holds and
crawled under the house.
The boy is a fugitive from justice.
The old woman is laid up, and Tilly
daren't open her head. But Gabe saya
to outsiders. “ I doesn't mind de turkle,
: but I’ll whitewash any gemmen’s house
free for nuffln which will find dat dog
an’ dat boy fer me.”
Darkey Grundiloquoney.
Hero is a sample of actual occurrence in
Washington Market, having been overheard
by a friend, whom it pleased so much that
he took it down at the timo :
My colored friend, George-Edward Fit*-
Auguatus walked up to the wagon of a fat
countryman, and, after peering for some
time at his stock, inquired :
“ Arc dose good taters?”
“Yes, sir,” responded the countryman.
“ A tatcr,” resumed George-Edward
Fit*-Augustus, “ is inevitably bad unless
it is unwanbly good, dcre is no mcdcocraty
in de combination ob a tater. Do exte
rion may appear remarkably exemplary
and beautisome, while de intcrion is total
ly negative. But, sir, if you warns de
article on your own recommendation,
knowing you to be a man oh probability
! in your transactions. I, widout any furder
circumlocution, takes a bushel ob dat su
, perior wcgctable.”
“ I shall die happy,” said an expiring
husband to his wife, who was weeping
most dutifully at his beside, “if you will
promise not to marry that object of my
inceasing jealousy, your cousin John.”
“Make yourself quite easy, my lore,”
said the expectant widow, “ I am engaged
to his brother Bill!”