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TIB cnMfli Dimcnl
CRAWFORDVILL55 - - GEORGIA.
general news.
Memphis has ten oil mills.
The grain and package elevator at
Memphis, Tenn., covers seven acres of
ground. thousand dollars have
Thirty-five
been raised for a cotton factory at Union,
Bonth Carolina.
One hundred and six houses have
been erected at Cullman, Ala., within
the last six months.
Florida has seventy-one newspapers.
Ol airborne county. Miss.; will raise
the largest coni crop this year since the
war. the
Wilkes county, <1* Noted on
stock law last week, and gave a majority
of seventy for “no fence.”
Work on the Birmingham cotton fac¬
tory is progressing very satisfactorily. It
will bo completed in a few weeks.
An organ factory has been discovered
ip Athens,Tenn., which turns out instru¬
ments that compare favorably with those
made elsewhere.
The porcelain works in Augusta coun
ty, Va., have commenced operations,
and goods equal to any ever made are
turned out in large quantities.
Some 10,000 bushels of Leon (Fla.)
conuty’s last year’s corn crop and re¬
main in the hands of the producers,
can be bought for 35 cents a bushel.
There are many parts of south Flor¬
ida where the co-ops of Guavas are great¬
er than the people can use: being a per¬
ishable fruit it cannot be shipped.
One firm in Gates county, N. C.,owns
thirty miles of narrow-gauge railway,
connecting five of its saw mills. Tt is
the largest lumber business in the Htate
Johiah T. Wall, Florida’s colored ex
Congressman, now farming in Alachua
county, will realize between $ 7 ,(XX) and
$ 8 (XX) net from his vegetable crop this
,
year.
North Carolina has two of the lar
gent vineyards cast of . the T> Rocky , moun
tains. The grapes raised are coming
into great demand even obtaide of the
State.
A water drinking match occurred at
the Iron HpringH, near Iuka last week,
between Mr. John Hays, of Memphis,
■ ................
drinking two and a half gallons.
Avtkk taking out the amount of a fare
a Texas railroad conductor handed $19,
it »-......—» and refused togiveitnp rr-*■*** on the ground
that, lie did uol ask the conductor for iI
The band of Heocfid Adventists which
* at Fairfax .......“"'—7 Oourt-liouse, Vn., appeal to
have carried everything before them in
that village, and it in said that in a short
,i„ law , hr
a number of their converts will build for
tiioni.
Tiie funioiiH live oak tree, known as
the “Devil's Riding Whip,” which is sit
uati*d three-quarters of a mile northeast
of the “ Devil’s Mill Hopper," near
Gainesville, Fla., measures 33 feet and
4 J inches in circumference one foot from
the ground. The tree is hollow and af¬
fords ample shelter for 40 hogs.
People at the Hygeia Hotel, Old
Point Comfort, Va., drive over to St,
John's Protestant Episcopal church, at
Hampton, which is the oldest sacred ed¬
ifice in the country. It was built of
brick brought from Holland in 1(558. Its
lveil, given by Queen Elizabeth, was
meltisl in a fire that once burned in the
structure for three days.
Before the war Alabama raised a
great deal of cotton and not much of
anything else; now she produces much
00 m, beats some northern states in the
production , of . oats, . finds . , pn.iit ... 111 . pork, ,
wool, and lias a pleasing assortment of
mines and mills. She also raises ten
por cent more of cotton than she did ten
years ago. hhe , 1ms also , doubled , , 1 ,, 1,1
number «f her farms.
Jonesboro (Go.) News: There are two
nui calling themselves elde** in the
Mormon church stopping . in ... the western ,
portion of oiir oovuitv. ihey hail fix an
Utah, and their presence hew Ixxles no
good. To tolerate their nefarious
preaching is a reflection on the iutelli
gence of our people, ana, unless the law
oiut be made to reach them, common de
cenev demands that they be notified to
notitied to go, and stand not upon the
order of their going but to go at once.
Lynchburg News: We were shown
yesterday, by Mr. Henry Charles, a flag
for the Southern Confederacy which he
made at the outbreak of the war, and at
Confederate u,. States "ere asked 7 for. It
is very much faded,but its o- lpre are yet
brillant enough to show that it was n
•re placed on it in the form of a cross.
EDITORIAL NOTES.
The wholesale shipping of nils and
munitions t war, from the United Stut< s
« to China, has been mode pul .1 T1
uni int expendot in th: eouutrv tin
far by the Chinese government is $5,000,
‘
000 .
In view of the damaging effect which
the Potlaeh feasts are having on the civ¬
ilization of the Indians of the northwest
territories and British Columbia, the do¬
minion government in the official gazette
recommends and urges the abandonment
of the practice of Potlaeh, proclaiming
a continuance of the same to be in viola¬
tion of their counsel and desire. The
practice is indulged in by teth rich and
poor, who spend their time and money
in accumulating property to distribute
among their own and other tribes. The
custom of Potlaeh is baaed on a desire
afor destruction, and is practiced with
view of receiving greater presents than
♦hose marl -. The poor borrow from the
rich to be able to practice Potlaeh, pay¬
ing exorbitant and ruinous interest or
usury, for advances in money or goods.
The custom, which is also practiced
among United States Indians on the Pa¬
cific, it is held, leads to immoral practi
CCS, those entering into it frequently
depriving their families and themselves
of the necessaries of life for that purpose.
It will readily be seen that the result
must prove most ruinous if the practice
is allowed to continue. The dominion
government, however, prefer to coun se
and advise rather thaii enforce its aboli¬
tion. Thus failing, more stringent
measures will likely be adopted.
AMERICAN FABLES.
Tlie Sailor and I lie Shark--The Vox and (lit
Farmer.
A Peasant, who had often heard that
Truth was a Jewel lying at the Viottom
of a well, one day descended into his well
to search for the treasure. He skinned
his knees and elbows, barked his nose,
run an old fork into his foot, and shivered
around for six long hours before liis wife
drew him up and asked:
“What in Goodness’ name were you
doing down there ?”
Looking for Truth.”
Why 1 could have told you before
you went down that you were the big¬
gest Fool in America!”
moral :
Yon can get more ’Truth than you want
around any well-curb.
THE BAILOR AND THE SHARK,
A Sailor who had fallen overboard and
WU8 speedily interviewed by a Shark,
cried out to his enemy :
“Have pity on a man who is down 1”
“My friend,” himself replied above the Shark, is “a of
man who keeps is i water ”
HO U(je to me< Now my t mo 1
• moral:
The man who falls overboard in busi
^ p\ lx one day made a call upon a
Peasant and bitterly complained of the
custom of shutting poultry up nights in
ss&i
hoW uhooznforUhlo it must, lie tat the
-poobF* vlti.—It is
to mitigate."
^ shut up his fowls. Next morning he
came across the Fox just Pallet as he had fln
islied feasting on a fat and cried
.’.Well, you see,” grinned the Fowls, Reynard, but “I
feel very sorrry for at the
game time cannot afford to miss an op¬
portunity.”
moral:
The man with ten acres of loud to sew
is the chap who first sees the need of
on orphan usylum.— Detroit Free Press.
Female Government Clerks.
The Washington correspondent of the
Boston Advertiser says: Tho women
clerks employed by the Government in
with Washington are paid poorly compared
the male clerks. But $900 and
$ what 1,000 are large sums compared with
Boston they and could New expect, to receive would in
York. What the
shop desk girls 111 Boston say to going to a
at nine o’clock, completing their
work at four, going away without loss of
pay tar a month’s summer vacation, and
staying And that at is home what with pay whenever ill?
women clorks do here
at $1,(XX) a year.
What wonder that scores of them sup
port families, educate children and have
m<mey 8 ave d. Wit n the prospect of
permanency these government positions
art 1 by no means despicable. They re
quire only honesty, decent appearance
a»d ordinary education, and (hey fnr
ni s h a respectable and sure income. A
clorks clerkship is not to te scorned, and the
sh hours are to and te pitied laxity only rigor because too
" rt a of eueour
age shirks and idlers. The women are
no( wor(u 8l) much RS men . Tlu ,y im!
j ( » vSS constant and harder to manage.
But in some kinds of work they excel. A
feeling against their employment is
prevalent, based which to some extent follow when upon
\lie abuses inevitably
these places are given as matters of per
tonal favor. Some of these are so glar
and pernicious who that they cannot be
told. But those understand best
the way things have teen will rejoice
that it is something besides favor which
will hereafter influence these selections,
h> general, women remain but a few
rears in government employ. Untar
fitted. tuuately, those who do not are the test
art hundreds pity"and of "im«i ^io tue'letein'ed have out
| ‘ thev principles'
•, jt \v'ere “business
JJ* ; * u . iuake one willing thai
some Lritndeh* allowed in D'fainino- the
>torm-beau\u.
Plkpokp.—I t ’.7 estimated that tire
pawnbrokers of New York city have
fully $30,000,000 of pledges in their pos
session.
STARTING A -TAPER.
why AS ARKANSAS KSTERPuisE was
SUDDENLY abandoned.
[From the Arkansaw Traveler.]
Captain Lomuth has just returned
from an interior county, where he went
some time ago to establish a much
needed and left loudly-demanded newspaper. full
When he Little Rock he was so
of hope, and so confident that his enter
prise would prove a success, that his
sudden re-appearance and declaration
that his venture was a failure, created
an inquiring interest among his friends,
“Why did you give up the enterprise,
captain ?” he was asked the other even
ing. “Well,” lie replisd, Wowing cloud
a
of smoke over the head of a short man
who sat on the opposite side of the
table, “I did not receive sufficient en
conragement to continue, but received
a great .deal of it te quit. Arkansaw
may be the future home of the coun
try paper, but at present I am inclined
to believe that the hand press and the
roller are mistaking the their calling, tradi- and
misappropriating wisdom of
tion, when pine they assume Some citizenship under I
the rural tree. time ago
heard tliat Bugleville citizens wanted a news
paper, and that the of .the pros
perous place were so rife tar a local pub
lieation that they would con
tribute toward the Deffflaiu’iiWfotttblish
ment of a weekly journal. I wrote to a
leading citizen of the town, and his
reply fairly blazed with encouragement. ho
K l Of course we want a newspaper,’
said, ‘and to show you how alive our citi¬
zens are, come over and see what they
propose to put up by way of a starter. ’
I went over. and Everybody considerable was glad to
see me, with, ceremony
I was conducted around the town, con¬
sisting of a few board stores, a saw-mill,
a blacksmith shop, and an undertaker’s
establishment, which seemed to be the
livest institution in the place. Finally
we met in a back lot, and held a peering
in regard to the paper. After numerous
speeches, it was agreed situated to grant me for¬
ty-five acres of land, near town,
and then to further promote the matter,
the mayor declared that he would give
me a mule. This seemed encouraging
enough, and I invested what money I
hail in an office. I soon got things in
running shape, and by way of original¬ did
ity, I called my paper the Shark. I
not attempt to canvass for subscriptions
until the first number was issued, pre¬
ferring to let people see what I could do.
When the paper came out, I went
around town, having hired an apt pen¬
man to accompany me, and take down
the names of the subscribers, while I
solicited and called them off. The first
man we struck said: ‘Certainly,you may
put me down. ’
“ ‘For a year ?’ I asked.
<< ( Oh, yes, or for two years.’
‘“la m much obliged to you,’ I grate¬
fully replied. all. Needn’t write out
“ ‘Not at a re¬
ceipt, lor you see, one acre of the forte
five don’t given think you, that you was will donated have any by troutfry me.^J
running a paper on forty-five
land, for I understand that fol t -<
most successful in
arc oiHf r ikiia
acres. ’
“I moved away, ACmewhat disap¬
pointed. The next gentleman, an intel
fident looking fellow, said:
“ ‘I have always been regarded as the
most enterprising mau in this communi
ty, and I must say that I am proud ol
the distinction. I. was ti* e “^t man to
suggi st the establishment of a news
paper, and I shall be by no means small
in my support. Put me down for two
subscribers—hold on, put me down for
three, as I want to send a copy to my
brother. No, a receipt is unnecessary.
Ten acres, of the forty-five, were do
nated by me. Just give me credit on
your books for the balance.
This dug deep into my flesh, but he
seemed to be so interested in my success
that I could not tell him how I longed to
stand flat-footed on the top of a barrel
and split an oak board over his head.
The next man we approached was very
warm in Ins praise of my intentions ; but
I decided upon being careful. The land
racket had been worked on me just a
little too often and was m a fair way to
bankrupt my scheme.
“ Did yon contribute any of the forty
five acres? I asked.
“Not a foot, lie repeated, but not
because I did not favor the project. l
am a surveyor, possess a fair degree ol
intelligence and shall be. more than
pleased "’Iren you have worked up a
good circulation.
: You will of course subscribe .
: Oh, yes, for two copies. advance
: I must insist on pay m
I said, when after a few moments he
still made no movements toward hand
iug out the money.
“ You are right, he replied. “ I ve
always thought that newspaper nien
were indiscreet m giving credit. Say,
tliexe s a little balance on our account.
You see, I surveyed the forty-live
aeres—”
“ Good day, sir,” _ and with anindigna- t
turn that lent agility afterward to my legs, the I walked
away. Soon I met mayor
who subscribed for ten copies, on the
strength of the mule, and a little further
on I met a inau who wanted to be put
down for six months because he had fed
the mule.
“I decided to sell t he land, and one
day went out for the first time to esti
mate its value. It was on one side of a
mountain and stood on its edge. A
thrifty German, who owned a farm ad
joining my land, said that he plowed by
meousofa windlass at the top of the lau-t.
When the plow was wonnd up he would
f urrow . Just as I was about to dose a
trade with the German, the sheriff came
mt the lan -* fornou-payment
is ^
“This is the return we get for kind
ness > fellow-citizens. We started ’nm
in business, gave him lands and stock,
now he wants to desert us. We’ll give
him fifteen minutes in which to leave
the town.”
<»I went to the stable to get my mule,
was lying down in the stable when I
entered, bat I aroused him, but a bridle
on him, and left The mule began tc
stagger, and by the time I had gotten
two miles from town, he laid down and
died. Then I started on foot, and after
walking sixty mil' s reached the railroad.
I still own the office, and am willing to
sell at a reasonable figure.”
STORY OF THE CUSTER MASSACRE
An Account ol the Klnugliter Given by ai
Indian Woman.
Since General Custer and his com¬
mand of three hundred were massacred
by the braves of Sitting Bull, two which or
three accounts have been given
purported to be a correct history of the
fight. But of the particulars of the
scene there have been only meagre pub- ac
counts. The Pioneer Press now
lishes an interview between a correspond
ent at Standing Rock Agency and the
wife of Tatatukahegl ’ska, or Spotted
Horn Bull. This woman is first cousin
of Sitting Bull, and the story is vouched
for as being a true account of the battle,
After describing the advance and the re¬
treat of Major Reno—whom she declared
to be either drunk or crazy, and his men
thoroughly panic-stricken—the woman
stated that the retreat and its conse
quent slaughter was scarcely ended
when the blare of Custer’s trumpets told
the Sioux of his approach; but they
were prepared for him. The men quiet- gal
ly crossed the river, and hundreds
. taped to his rear, out of range at first,
but soon hemming him in constantly
narrowing circles. The woman mounted
her pony and rode behind her camp,
where she could get a good view of the
hills beyond. She saw the troops come
up and dismount. Each fourth man
seized the bridles of three horses besides
liis own. The rest deployed and ad¬
vanced on the run toward the river. She
saw the terrible effect of the withering fire
which greeted the approach from the
willows on the Indian’s side of th 9
stream, and laughed as she said : “Our
people, boys and all, had plenty of guns
and ammunition to kill the new soldiers.
Those who had run away left them be¬
hind.” Slowly trotting north along noted the
outskirts of the encampments, she
the Indians who had crossed getting
closer to the troops. She watched the
latter—those who were left of them—
retreat to their horses and mount. She
heard the yells of her kindred and the
shouts of the whites; bat soon, as the
former grew plentier and the lattei
fewer, she could distinguish little save
here and there an animated cluster of
men and horses.
Slowly the pony jogged down the
stream. When she reached the Miune
oonjo camp, on the extreme left, not an
hour’s ride, she said not one white sol¬
dier was visible on the field. Of horses
there were plenty; these the Indians
spared. The Custer men were soon
stripped and the Indians knew they had
killed the long-haired chief; by his buck
kin coat trimmed with beaver which
-hey found upon him. The Sioux lost
thirty killed and more than twice as
many wounded, the Indians numbering
five thousand in all.
The Romance of the Bridge.
The Brooklyn Bridge has its romance.
ted837, vf t when the first Bridge
as the Chief Engineer of the woi^ 5 *His
thorough practical knowledge of the pointed con¬
struotion of suspension bridges
)q m ou j aB the proper person for the
p 0 s jtion. He had already contemplated
8Uc h a structure and felt a warm inter
es [ hi the enterprise. He embarked in
^ w jth enthusiasm, and for two years
wor hed faithfully at the important pre¬
h m j nar i e8 .
Q ne da y w fiile standing on the pier at
t jie f err y g ]ip 0 n the Brooklyn side his
f 00 [ was this accidently crushed. Sixteen the
hays after unfortunate occurrence
engineer died of lockjaw, before a stroke
of actual construction had been done to
jp e bridge. Here was one valuable life
sacr ificed to the great work,
The dea d man - 8 son, who was familiar
w ith all his plans, took liis place as Chief
Engineer. Like his father, he was de
vot 5d to the enterprise. He labored at
it more dflligeutiv and for more hours of
[he day than any of his subordinates,
a disease, contracted through con
s tant exposure to the damp of the foun
dations, destroyed his health. Three
y ear8 a f[ er his father's death he was
physically regained prostrated, although his mind
ns clear as ever. He removed
j 0 a bouse on Brooklyn lie Heights from
[be windows of which could constantly
wa [ c b and direct the work, although his
]j m b 8 were powerless. For twelve years
his brain has been laboring on the nn
dertaking, while the devotion and iutelli
gence f of liis wife have made up for the
oss of his bod i]y activity.
Colonel Roebling’s the health has been
sacr jg ee d to work, perhaps beyond
recovery. His sufferings, his persever
anoe atl d the assistance he receives from
^ -life’s devotion call to mind the case
of Mr. Henry Fawcett, the English Post
mas n>r General, who, although afflicted
with blindness, carries on with the aid
of his wife one of the most exacting and
] a borious departments of the Govern
meJlt Despite their misfortunes, Mr.
Fawcett’s administration is vigorous and
e fl} c i e „t and Colonel Roebling’s brain
W ork has been of inestimable value to
be bridge enterprise.
----------—
[ Fenian Flag.
__
p; no -lish brig lying in the harbor ol
Corunna°recentlv hoisted flag at her main
mag [ a p en ; an dag. The was green
a white cross in the centre. At the
^, )Qje Hme s be was flying a small En
’ English
!ish fl at ber foremast. The
Q oltsn i sent a messenger to order the
the vessel. The Consul then summoned
the assistance of the Spanish Coast
Guard, and eventually a party of armed
srjsr" ei ””” un “
—----- ~
Novel-M r. W. A. Wiikrns ,
Another
editor of the Whitehall Urines and author
of a political novel, “The Cleverdale
Mystery,” which made a great deal of
talk daring the State campaign last year,
is writing another novel. He lays bis
plot this time about a watering place ho
$el, and will do the subject full justice.
PAPER RAILROAD TIES.
An Invention which, it is Said, will Save
American Forests.
[From the New York Sun.]
A tall man, with sharp features and a
thoughtful air, sat in a small study, and
gazed gravely at a brown object that lay
at his feet.
‘‘It is a paper railroad cross tie,” he
said.
The reporter lifted it with some diffi¬
culty. It was Of very close fibre, and so
wood. highly polished Its inventor that it resembled with rose¬ his
tapped it much
nail, and said: “It doesn’t look
like paper, does it
“It seems more like iron. Is it pos¬
sible that it is made of paper ?”
“Oh, yes; almost anything can now
be made of paper. A paper ball can be
rendered so solid that nothing will
indent it but a diamond tool. Car
wheels are now made of paper. Its
strength is astonishing. You can sus¬
pend 339 pounds from a Bank of Eng¬
land note and it will not part. Bath
tubs, pots, plates, knives, forks, cooking
stoves, printing presses, steam engines,
and chimneys are made of paper now¬
adays, and there is absolutely no limit
to the uses to which it may be put."
“Have paper cross ties ever been
used ?”
“Not yet. The cross tie is my in¬
vention.”
“How did you happen to think of
it ?”
“Well, I didn’t happen to think of it,
exactly. I started out deliberately to
irivent a substitute for the wooden cross
tie or sleeper, and I kept steadily at ;t
until I was successful. My attention
was first called to the matter by the
outcry raised by the newspapers against
the destruction of our forests, The
report of the Forestry Congress proved
beyond a shadow it of doubt impossible that before
many years would be to
supply the believe demand for wooden sleepers.
Can you that nearly seventy
million railroad ties are used every
year ? That is enough to build a solid
corduroy road around the world. More
than 10,000 miles of new railroad were
built last year. The life of a wooden tie
is only five years, and constant repairs
are necessary. To supply the demand
for the great railroad system of the
country it is necessary to chop down
three hundred thousand acres of
forest a year! It takes a hundred
years to grow trees to maturity, and we
cut down millions and millions of tin m
every year. How long can it If st ?
These are the figures presented by the
statisticians of the Forestry Congress and
adopted by that body.
“They taught me a wholesome les¬
son,” the inventor continued, smilimr
gently and drumming on the tie, “and I
improved it. I made up my mind that I
would find some substitute for wood.
Railroad men all over the country have
been trying to do this for years. They
have tried cross ties of granite, iron,
steel and glass. All failures. Besides
being very expensive, the rolling they were stock too all
rigid, and knocked
to pieces. The rails could not be fas¬
tened readily, either, so they were all
given up. Meanwhile wooden ties were
constantly getting higher in price, and I
was trying to hit upon a Substitute. I
ember e . that one morning I conceived
I thoudtit ♦»*“■<? was a brilliaf *
It had been by hahk_.j;
4 small town railroad in Massachusetts—W
walk out on the track while wor¬
rying over the probltm, and I had no
ticed that the wooden ties, though de¬
cayed at the ends, were apparently sound
and hard in the middle. My scheme was
to construct a machine that would saw
the ties in two in the middle. Then 1
proposed to turn the two sections of the
tie about, so that the sound ends would
be under the rails. I meant to clamp the
tie in the middle with a dog. Seems like
rather a wild scheme, now doesn't it ?
Well the day after my conception of this
plan I went out on the railroad with my
hatchet and chopped into the middle of
a number of the ties. I fouud everyone
of them in an advanced state of decay.
The outside of the tie was a sort of shell,
and seemed solid and hal’d. The sun
had dried it off rapidly on the outside
after it had been wet, but the moisture
had slowly soaked through the body of
the tie and rotted it away. I gave it up
for a time. I could think of nothing
feasible. I saw gangs of men who we^p
[employed by the railroad companies
constantly repairing and putting in nt-w
ties. This was another expense to b »
added to the cost of the short lived
wooded sleepers. There
“Then I thought of country paper, where are
scores of mills in the pa
per, straw, prairie grass, and other
fibrous substances are converted into
straw board. The process is simple.
The straw is reduced to a pulp and run
out imo boards. These straw boards
are sold all over the country as substi¬
tutes for wood. My invention utilizes
straw board. The cross tie is constructed
of sheets or layers of paper or straw
board, laid one upon another, cemented
and compressed into moulds. It makes
a perfect cross tie. It is practically wa
ter and fire proof, as it is manufactured
under 500 degrees of heat, Atmos
pberic changes have no effect on it. If
can be made as cheap as wood at the
present time, and will last at least twen
ty-five years. One paper tie will out
wear five wooden ones, and will render
tetter Service, because it does not rot
aud there is no danger of spreading
rails. The accident to the Long Branch
train last year was due, according to of
ficial investigation, to spreading rails,
The wooden ties had decayed so that
die spikes that held the raffs’were loose.”
‘‘Will the paper take a spike? It
seems like iron.”
“It will take a spike as readily as
the rolling stock of the railroad will not
mffer. weigh They are of uniform size, and
a little more than wood.”
M P?ble of being reduced to pulp
prairie grass, for instance. But how
can the straw give out? It takes ■
hundred years to grow a tree, while
straw grows every year. IntheNorth
west they bum straw in it vast quantities
very year so as to get out of the wav.
The paper tie must be adopted before
tong from sheer necessity. We can’t gc
on chopping down trees forever. The
paper tie deadens sound. Col. F. K.
Hain will shortly introduce it on the
elevated road. It’s a pretty good thing,
I guess, eh?” asked the inventor, and
:gain he smiled and drummed on the tie
with his finger nails.
A CHINESE DELICACY.
Birdsoest Soup and an Editor who does not
Hanker Alter It,
Every once or twice in a while we are
treated by the newspapers to long-winded
descriptions of birdsnest treated soup. We
would prefer to be to something
else. birdsnset Nobody which can has make d usbelieve duty in that
a ne rais¬
ing a brood of feathered songsters, and
that has been lying out in the rain for a
wet season or two, is the best material
for constructing a soup. We should
judge that the man who indulged in
birdsnest soup could not get the taste of
pinfeathers out of his mouth for a week.
Chopped up in a feed-cutter, and the
taste disguised with bran and potato
parings, it might be palmed off on order a sick
cow whose palate was out of so
that she couldn’t tell what she was eat¬
ing. But whenever a smoking birdsnest
soup is brought into the dining room,
accompanied by all the unpleasant asso¬
ciations which cling to it still, why, we
want to go right away and conceal our¬
selves in the chapparal until the feast of
reason and flow of soup has somewhat
subsided.
It doesn’t make any particular difference
to us whether the birdsuests are brought
from China or Kalamazoo, or whether
the original fowls wlio constructed the
nests were birds of Paradise or buzzards,
tomtits, killaloos, or sandhill cranes. All
we ask is, when the birdsnest soup is
brought in, and we catch the first sniff
of the aromatic fluid, that we be allowed
to go off to a lodge in some vast wilder¬
ness, where we can be alone with our
grief, while the other gnests are gorging
themselves on a high tariff diet, imported
at au immense expense.
People inclined capricious to jndge harshly, and may
term us peculiar, some¬
what sensitive in this matter of eating
last year’s birdsnests with the bottom
knocked out Perhaps we are. But we
don’t have to eat them, and more than
that, we don’t propose to so long as we
can get plenty of ordinary United Stat -s
food. Birdsnest soup is a rare delicacy,
no doubt, but we don’t hanker after it.
We have seen a birdsnest made of sticks
and clubs a foot and a half long, and
lined with an old buffalo r .be. It had
been the nursery of nine broods of young
eagles that we know of, and might, foi
all we know to the contrary, have been
rocked in the cradle of an old pine tree
top for centuries. The idea of boiling
that thing up into soup, and offering to
set it up for free-born American citizens
who pay poll taxes, vote, and help run
the government, is absurd. There is too
much of the man’s Inhumanity to man
business about it, and the ranker the
soup, the ranker the injustice. If we
had any tickets tar birdsnest soup we
would cheerfully give them to
— Texas Siftings.
A Too Fun ft
Brow eral, ȣ? lively Lfi bovtjJJ
is a very
reports. The other dawn
of the staff of the AttognM|
pitch of madness. ~
On his father’s desk -there 1 tot
buttons, connecting with electrical calls N
in all subordinate offices of the depart¬
ment, from the Solicitor-General down.
One day, not long Suddenly, ago, Benny before was the in
with his father.
latter could stop him, electric Benny began to
play upon all of the buttons at
once, as if upon the keys of a piano.
These sudden and repeated calls created
a panic in the department. The Solici¬
tor-General, a grave, dignified gentleman, the Chief
the Assistant Attorney-General, twenty chiefs,
Clerk, and in all about
came in one after another in mad haste,
only to be met by an apology from the
Attorney-Geneial, while Benny howled
with laughter upon the carpet where he
lay rolling, as the slaves of the buttons
appeared and disappeared, black with
wrath notwithstanding Brewster’s ami¬
able begging for forgiveness of the mad
freak of his dear, merry son.
Left Him There.
On'- of flie characters in Lord Beacons
field’s “Endymion,” named Mr. Vigo,
was intended for the famous London
tailor, Poole. The story of Poole is now
o-oing the rounds that, when walking one
day in King’s road, Brighton, a “larky”
young nobleman, who had teen lunching
with some friends, determined to ‘ ‘risk
a life at Poole,” as lie expressed loudly it. asked So
going to “our Vigo,” he
what the deuce hem ant by building such
a coat as that he (the young lord) was
wearing. The eminent tailor merely
said that he regretted having failed to
meet with his lordship’s approbation,
and asked him to button up the coat.
This done, Mr. Vigo took a piece of taff
dr’s chalk from his pocket and remark proceeded the
quite gravely to mark and
coat well nigh ail over, until it looked
like a mountebank’s jacket, and then,
gravely raising his hat, he assured his
lordship that if he would call with the
coat the next time he was passing, his
(Mr. Vigo’s) people would duly alter it
before the ^
for him. And long hit retort, young
sprig of nobility had upon of a of
he was left in the centre a group
grinning friends.
A Sick Cat.—M rs. ’VTliittomore. of Liv¬
ermore Falls, Me., had a pet cat which
was taken sick. The lady, proposing heated to
doctor the cat after her own style, and
a blanket, wrapped it around the cat
started for the bam. It is supposed that
a spark of fire was imprisoned in the
blanket while being heated before the
fire. The cat started suddenly, ran for
the hav-mow and disappeared, The
bam took fire and was burned to the
ground. It was only by hard fighting
that the house was saved. The cat has
not reappeared.
Translated from the Omnibus : “I
regret much, Mr. Captain, the requested
furlough not to grant; now is not the
time for pleasure.” “Mr. Colonel, I need
the furlough not for pleasure; I want
to—marry.”