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(T/n' (True (Citizen.
Sullivan Brothers, Publishers.
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POSITIVELY CAS II.
Volume 2.
Wavnesboro, Georgia, Friday, September 28th, 1883.
»'maunuvs auocT
(Jov. McDaniel has approved the
Act to make Waynesboro a city.
The family in Athens recently
poisoned by ground glass, have re
covered.
WIDTHS AM) BLACKS.
A Hare Conflict
Kninilnont
Texan.
in (Jrpjnr County,
“Athens has two negro drum
mers,” says an exchange, and we
would remark that the negroes will
shortly have Athens.
G A IiVKSTOX, Sept. 17.-
liongview special says:
terror prevails in every
Number 20,
(J he (True (Citizen.
Advert!Mins: Rotes :
Transient iulvs. payable in lulvanee.
('onlrnrt ml vs. payable ipiat'lerly.
I 'lUnniimli-Htiniis lor personal beiiellt will l>c
chanted for ns mlvs., payable In advance.
Ailvs. occnpylnr special position chained 25
per cent. in l< 111 ion j.
Notices nnmin; ivndlng matter lOeonts per
lln>', nil'll Insertion.
Not lees In l.oenl ,V lluslness eolunin, next to
rending, 5 cents per line eneli insertion.
All notices will lie plueeil nnioiif: milling
matter if not specially ordered otherwise.
For terms apply at i his office.
Savannah News.
About dusk on Sunday evening,
when the watchman in charge of
barge of Fort Jackson returned to
leading
lock
A lilKltOKKK BOMANCK.
The Story of the Life of tiro. V . lUiig—A Fortune
to Ills Children.
from which place there is no report
The excitement is due to a raid on
the whites, supposed to bo contem
plated by negroes. The white far
mers have their wives and children
in gin houses, and are holding guard
over them. In some communities
little or no sleep has been had since
Friday night, and haggard faces,
with looks of fear or great deter
mination, are seen everywhere.
Hlood curdling reports are brought
in by each new arrival. Hundreds
I of countrymen were in Longview
'flic portrait of the lute Senator i to-day, and on going to their homes
Hill, executed by Mr. Horace Rrail- carried all the arms and ammuni-
ley, has been hung in Represent*- tion obtainable. In many cases,
live Hall accompanied by appro-j when the last weapon was called
The AVie.x’
A reign of
portion of bis post, he found the door
the county except, perhaps, Kilgore, 1 ‘ n to the fort broken down, the
broken off and-a man armed with j Rock, Arkansas, and all but one
of this boy
Americas Republican.
Before the war a party of Chero
kee Indians while journeying to the
Indian Territory, fell sick at Little
The Greenback State Committee
of Massachusetts, has unanimously
nominated Hen. Butler for governor,
with a full State ticket.
'I’ll !•:TurnCiti/.kn acknowledges
an invitation to attend the Virginia
State Fair, to he held at Richmond
from October 31st to November lid,
inclusive.
u musket and a pistol posted at the | boy died. The father
entrance, bidding the watchman j was David Welsh. Young David
not to advance. The intruder wus | was adopted by one Dr. George W.
requested su state by what authori- Ring, of Little Rock, who bestowed
tv he held possession of the proper- his own name on him on the day or
ty of Uncle Sam, and was informed j his adoption. George grew to a
by “the authority of might.” man’s estate, espoused the southern
The watchman parleyed with the j cause, and fought all through the
man who finally said he had plenty | war. When the clash of arms
of ammunition, and that was stored ceased lie wandered away tiom
in a glass bottle, and that if the for- Arkansas, and finally stopped at
mer would take a drink lie would Americas, in our state. There be
permit him to enter. j made himself a good citizen, and
The terms were accepted reluc- wooed and won the hand of u Miss
tantly in order that the watchman Dickson, by whom lie had five chil-
printc ceremonies.
George Wallace, the condemned
murderer in the Savannah jail, has
developed into a raving lunatic.
T.ie Governor refused to interfere
with the sentence of the court.
The abolishment of the Atlanta
Custom House is being contemplat
ed by Secretary Folger. In the
first place, its establishment should
never have been considered, it is
a monument of folly and extrava
gance. In our opinion, the Atlanta
Custom House “should go.”
for, a number would grab for it as
though in desperation, and strive
to obtain it as though their lives de
pended upon its possession. A new
supply of 'll) Winchesters was
among what was taken by the
countrymen.
It is reported
have received by
could see what other property bad
been destroyed. When he had
gained access live other men came
up, when an indiscrimidate tiring
of pistols and guns followed, the
invaders accompanying the fusil
lade by shouting like demons and
by dancing. The gang, consisting
of three white men and three ne-
that the negroes | g lw ‘ s > ll,iall >’ left in a boat by NVay
express at Glad-
of the Savannah river.
The watchman discovered
that
droll. A few years ago Ring moved
to Macon, and died here about two
years ago. A short time since the
widow received a letter from Joseph
G. Hester, census commissioner of
the eastern hand of the Cherokees,
at Asheville, N. (’., detailing the
fact of the death of the Indians at
Little Rock, and also of the adop
tion of young Daniel by Dr. Ring.
He stated that he had heard of her
whereabouts from a Mrs. Josephus
“As to the postage on m^iil matter
between the United States and
Canada a somewhat curious com
plication was discovered. By the
postal convention between Canada
and the United States it is provided
that‘all articles of mail matter ex
cept sample's must he fully prepaid
at the domestic -ates of the country
of origin, and are deliverable free
of charge in the country of destina
tion.’ It will he seen that, under
this article, a letter mailed in any
part of the United States for any
part of Canada will require 2-cents
postage, which is the rate in the
‘country of origin.’ Canada, how
ever, has, it is understood, refused
to reduce its domestic postage, tin*
rate of which is still !l-cents. A let
ter, therefore, mailed in Canada for
a point in the United States will
require 8-eents postage, which is
the rate of‘tin* country of origin.’ ”
“When will the change take
place ?”
“At midnight on September 80th.
All letters mailed up to that time
will require the old stamp, the rate
of postage by a rule of the Depart
ment, being fixed at the mailing
ollicc and not at the delivery.”
has arisen from the threats and
speeches of a few colored persons
! of had repute, whose course is not
The Atlanta Const itrt ioncontain- j sanctioned and was not known by
eil 1(1 pages on last Sunday, and was i the mass of the negroes. There are
then complaining about not having | indications that as much fear lias
enough room. The Count it tit ion is 1 been executed among the latter as
, ;
water, t lie next station west, .... ,, .... ,, ,. ,
Wini-liewtei's, ami II,at » arc I "» •>* *>»’> «™» 1,1 1“ '«*" ‘"'"H "." ol " f
being received by them all over the lmM l' n, l' t ' rt . v !>'«' <“ ll “' 1,0 j 1 ' 8 ' 1 ' 1 "! M ’ " K °
countv. Probably the whole trouble I tmt n re|«.rt«l to the I n.teil semi lorn of her mnmage
States Marshal yesterday, and it is and full names ot her live children
probable the party who captured ! in order that they might receive a
the fort will be arrested to-day
A Highly*)' Bobber).
Columbus Times, Sept. it.
Yesterday morning Mr. R. H.
Stanford started from his store near
Cottage Mills to this city. Ilecom
mit only one of the leading morn-j among the whites. However this
ing dailies of our State, hut is fast may be, the people have been our-
takinga seat in the ranks of the j ried to such a pitch of excitement I menced bis journey on foot, expeet-
Icading dailies in the Union. that it is certain that should a white ing soon to he overtaken by a
I person he molested, one of the friend. Arriving at a dense portion
bloodiest tragedies will be enacted ! of the road about eight miles from
ever known. ! the city, in Chatalioocliee county
W [Till’s Point, Sept. 17.—Nows [near Upstoil bridge he was sudden-
was received here this evening ly confronted by two white men,
The special committee of the
House, appointed under the resolu
tion of Mr. Zachry, of Henry, to in
vestigate the alleged mutilation of
the evidence taken before the com
mittee to investigate the agricul
tural bureau, in which alleged muti
lation the name of Mr. Crenshaw,
of Troup, was seriously involved,
met and investigated the charges,
and reported almost unanimously,
oxhonorating Mr. Crenshaw from
tin' implications contained in the
resolution of Mr. Zachry.
A Hill has passed the House, mak
ing it an indictable offense for a
saloon keeper to sell liquor to a
drunkard, after being warned not
lo do so by the wife or children of
the drinking man. This is in itself
a sort of prohibition law, if the suff
erers arc disposed to give* the warn
ing, and then indict, if the whisky
is sold after the warning is given.
The bar-keeper, or tender, who wil
fully gives to tin' inebriate the
means with which lie may accom
plish his destruction, is an accessory
in the first degree, and should ho as
culpable before the law as he who
furnishes a knife to one man in an
affray, with which to stall another.
The law in such cases should he
both special and severe.
from Longview for our citizens to
be ready at a moments notice to go
to the assistance of the white citi
zens of that place, and it created
considerable excitement among the
people here. The streets are lined
with a large number of armed men,
ready to go to Longview at any
time when called upon. The
trouble is between the white's and
blacks, and it is feared there will he
clash, as a large meeting of negroes
lias taken place at Longview, and
they have threatened to burn tin*
town and run tilings to suit them
selves. With the help Longview
can get from surrounding towns,
any disturbance can lie very easily
suppressed.
Marshall, Sept 17.—A telegram
just received from the sheriff of
Gregg county, at Longview,says:
“Tilings look squally. Hold your
men in readiness to help.” It is be
lieved to 1)0 merely a cautionary,
and probably an uncccssary alarm.
Saving ills Father’s Life*
who demanded his money. Seeing
that resistance was useless, he sub
mitted to being robbed of what
money he had on his person, which
amounted to .$1)0. The men then
allowed the old gentleman to pro
ceed on his way, not rejoicing, un
molested. Mr. Sanford says he never
saw either of the men before, but
would recognize them if he saw
them again. One of them was
dressed in a blue suit with cloth
cap; the other was clad in jeans,
and wore a hat with round crown.
The two men remained over the
previous night with a negro near
the scene of the robbery, and the
negro says they Wiled his pockets,
but as lie was “hard-up,” obtained
only twenty cents and a pipe.
The men have not yet been ar
rested. They certainly are hold in
their action, and should be speedily
brought to an account of their dep
redations.
certain amount of money due their
father as a Cherokee, by the govern
ment. Mrs. Ring put the letter in
the hands of Mr. J. J. Clay, who
conducted the correspondence for
her yesterday. Yesterday another
letter was received from Hester,
asking for a few corrections as to
full flames of children, etc., and
thus the matter stands. Jt is to he
hoped that the children will receive
the money. Two of the hoys are
working in Bornd Brothers estab
lishment.”
We copy the above from the
Telegraph anil Messenger, and will
correct a portion. George W. Ring,
was a typo in the Republican office
from 18(1") up to about three months
of his death, which took place in
1872 or 1873. He was a hard work
ing honest man. He was shot
through tlu> leg at Chickamauga,
hut it would hardly he known from
his walk. He and his ufife are buri
ed in Oak Grove cemetery, while
bis mother-in-law, Mrs. L. K. Dixon,
with the five children, are living in
Macon. One of them, a boy, is
named Charles Hancock Ring, for
the editor of the Republican.
('listing (it'll. I.ee’. Holly.
Now York Tribune.
Yesterday was a gala day at the
foundry in Mercer street of the
Bronze Manufacturing Company,
which is making the castings for
Doyle’s colossal statue of Gen.
Robert E. Leo, ordered by the city
of New Orleans. The statue is to
be sixteen feet high. The figure is
being cast, according to the ordinary
practice, in fragments, which will
be riveted together so deftly as not
to show any ot the joints. The
statue represents the Confederate
General standing in a contemplative
attitude with his arms folded. His
military hoots have already been
c ist and one half of the folded arms,
and yesterday the principal frag
ment, consisting of the chest and
abdomen, was cast, requiring over
2,000 pounds of metal. Among
those present were Gen. King, of
Gov. Cleveland’s staff. Gen. Geo.
ITltUKJiT Ol.KAMXdS.
Heath of Kx-('niigri>Kiiiimii Sloan, of (ieorgln.
•Si IiVkk City, N. M., Sept. 2-1.—
Andrew Sloan, a prominent lawyer
of this city, died this morning of
malarial fever. He was a member
the Forty-third Congress, and a
native of Savannah, Ga., which dis
trict he represented in the house.
Two Mormon Kldcrn Arrested For Vagrancy.
The grand jury of Clayton county
recently found true hills of indict
ment against two missionary Mor
mon elders named \V. A. Wilson
and S. J. Paris, charging them with
vagrancy, in that they were stroll
ing about the country without occu
pation or visible means of support.
War Material Khl|i| Oil.
PiiiiiADKi.i’iiiA, September 24.—
The steamship Ethel cleared from
this port to-day. Her manifest
showed eight cannon, dynamite,
shells, and munitions of war of all
sorts. She will sail for Port An
Prince and is owned by the Hay-
tain government. No attempt was
made to prevent the vessel sailing.
A 1‘i‘trlfli'il Clam.
Montezuma Record.
We were shown n petrified clam
by Mr. F. E. Harrison, who is en
gaged on the river improvement
force below Albany. There are
great shoals in the river down there,
and Mr. Harrison tells us that this
clam was taken from a rock as large
as the Record office. Tie also had
a sea globe taken from the same
rock in a perfect state of petrifica
tion.
Vouched For hy Witnesses.
Henry County Weekly.
Mr. A. H. Hambrick, of Stock-
bridge, has an ear of corn, or rather
a cluster of ears, that is a genuine
curiosity. When the stalk was in
full silk there appeared in the tas
sel forty-two diminutive hut per
fectly distinct ears of corn, each
separate from the other, and dis
tinctively marked with rows of
grain. In addition to these, the
stalk bore two full-grown ears in
the regular course of growth and
maturity—all of which can be
HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS.
Latham, of Georgia, who was on vouche(l for by responsible wit-
Lee’s staff; Henry J. Newton, M. A.
A good deal of criticism is being
indulged in hy the press of the
State, in regard to the recent action
of Gov. McDaniel in the matter of
the appointment of Mr. Hanson, of
Macon, as one of the Capitol Com
missioners. If we have gleaned
correctly, the Governor, in this in
stance, allowed his own judgment
to become abused and finally divert
ed, simply to gratify a few local
politicians, who could urge no argu
ment against the eminent qualifi
cations of Mr. Hanson, and who
were forced to admit at last that
prejudice alone was the animus of
their opposition. The history of
this affair is anytliiiigbut creditable
lo the politicians concerned in its
details, ami certainly will not re
dound to their future benefit or
glory.
owspnper
to Athens ami taking advertise
ments at $30 a year per column.
Tlile is not only ruinous to them,
hut tin 1 printing business. II is true
their circulation don’t reach over
Hvo or three hundred copies, but
they don’t tell merchants this when
they solicit their work, or they
would do the cause no particular
harm.—Athens /tanner. The same
can he said of Augusta, only they
are more numerous and take ad
vertisements for even less than tin*
above figures.—Augusta .Xrtrs.
The above paragraph is “more
truth than poetry.” The publish
ers that our Athens contemporary
complains of, are most of them
members of the Georgia Press As
sociation, and while we think the
/tanner rigid in its complaint, we
say couldn't our Press Association
form a scale of prices for such ol
their brethren who lire wholly in
experienced in the newspaper busi
ness, ns those who know the value
of their work surely will not under
rate it.
Kkyton, Calhoun County,
Sept. 22.—Allison, the little nine-
year-old son of Mr, \N. P. Perry, ot
Calhoun county, saved his father’s
life hy a remarkable display of
courage and deliberation.
This little son of Mr. Perry, and
a stout negro man, named Pleas
ant Woodson, were driving the gin
of Mr. Perry. Allison had a whip
that had been given him hy a negro
hoy on the place.' Pleasant wanted
the whip and being refused hy the
little hoy, took it by force, choking
and otherwise treating the little
fellow very roughly. About the
time Pleasant attacked Allison Mr.
P. rode up in Lis buggy, nml seeing
his little hoy in the hands of the
enraged ruffian, ran up with ids
buggy whip, when the negro drew
his knife and rushed upon Mr.
Perry, wlio being unarmed, struck
the negro with the butt end of his
whip, Imping thereby to check his
advance. The whip broke, however,
ami Mr. P. stepping backward,
stumbled over a wagon tire and
foil, his assailant’s knife piercing
his clothes and slightly cutting his
thigh. The negro fell on Mr. Perry
with open knife, and was just in the
aci of plunging the long, keen blade
in Mr. Perry’s heart, when Allison,
seeing his father’s extreme peril,
picked up an old axe, and with the
courage and precision of a man,
struck the negro a stunning blow
on the head, so completely demor-
izing him that lie scampered away
with adilhd brain and bruised
head. Thus it will lie seen that a
aim-year-old boy saved 11is lather
from a horrible death hy having
pluck.
Wiiyliilil nml Murdered.
Augusta Clirnnlclo.
Four negro men, who work on
the different farms along the river
near Hand Bar Ferry, got into a
difficulty last week about an old
shot gun. Three of them, Charlie
Tyson, Dave Carey and another
negro, became incensed with the
other, Abe Stewart, and determin
ed to kill him. They accordingly
laid their plans. They secreted
themselves on the side of the road
about a mile from the ferry, where
it was known Stewart would pass
about sun-up. Charlie Tyson the
leader of the party armed himself
with a pistol of heavy callibre, and
wlien Stewart was seen approach
ing, cocked it. Just as the unsus
pecting man got opposite the am
bush Tyson tired. Stewart threw
up his hands and staggered into the
cotton on the side of the road, where
he expired in a few minutes, shot
through the heart. The murder
was soon discovered hut wo could
not learn whether the assassins
were captured or not. Stewart was
a driver for Mr. Dunbar Lamar and
bore a very good reputation.
Magaud, James Gilftllan, Col. A. II.
Girard and Eugene F. Ancaigne.
'l’lie visitors stood upon a mound of
some other part of Gen. Lee’s body,
which is ready, or nearly so, for the
metal, and upon such other places
as seemed out of danger. Silence
had been requested, as heavy east
ings are awkward operations, and
the foreman is the only one who is
permitted to speak until the metal j one sneeze, and looking around
nesses.
A Novel ill'll.
Savannah News.
On tlie Ogeechee road, about four
miles from the city, a negro has a
bed up in a gum tree. His aerial
couch was discovered yesterday
morning hy a colored man passing
by. As the discoverer, a teamster,
was driving past, he heard some
.1 fontrzum i Recant: We picked
up an old seal ot the state ol (leor-
gia In our office u few days ago
dated 1799. The impression was
taken in wax, as the sealing now j the station until the knot was tied
1 here , ....
Chattanooga '/’hues, Sept. 21:—
Yesterday a peculiar incident oc
curred on the Alabama Great
Southern Railway. A couple were
seen to hoard the train hurriedly at
Collinsville, Ala., and glance around
furtively ns if fearing pursuit and
seemed to breathe easier when the
train was in motion. They held a
private consultation with the con
ductor and he seemed to take in the
situation. When the train readied
Trenton the couple accompanied by
tlie conductor, disembarked. ’Squire
’Jobe was hastily summoned and
soon made the couple one. Their
names were James Hill and Miss
Mary Hall. The train waited at
Tin 1 Hostage lti'durtioii.
Savannah News.
The reduction in postage, to take
place next week, is an event of
general interest all over the coun
try, and a great many questions are
asked concerning the change.
“What is going to be done about
redeeming the 3-cent postage stamps
on October 1st?” inquired a Morn
ing JYcirs reporter of a post office
official yesterday.
“We have received no definite
instructions on that point,” was the
reply. “There will, however, he
little difficulty. At present we can
not issue 2-eent stamps in exchange
for the 3, hut some arrangement
for the exchange will probably he
made. All that we can do is to ex
change the 3-cent stamped envelope
at the cost of postage. The instruc
tions received last July in regard
to the reduction of stamp orders
read: “All postmasters are instruct
ed to limit their requisition for
3-cent stamps and envelopes to
quantities that, on a careful estim
ate, may he ib'cmed sufficient to
last until October 1st. To tlie same
end the department will, whenever
it is deemed proper, curtail the
requisitions for that denomination,
or substitute a suitable amount of
the 1 mid 2-eent denominations.
Postmasters will take all available
means of calling public attention to
tlie coming reduction of postage, so
that purchasers may not accumulate
an unnecessary supply of 3-cent
stamps or stamped envelopes.”—
Tlie same circular states that no
arrangement had been made for
the redemption of the old stamps,
and directs postmasters to make no
exchanges for the public, anil not to
return to the department the stock
remaining on their hands after
October 1.”
has ceased to flow. The clay mould
in its iron castings was in the centre,
showing clearly the hole into which
the molten bronze was to be poured
from a huge iron pot swung by
strong chains from a stout crane.
Around the furnace were the cru
cibles of fire-clay, in which the
bronze glowed with a fierce, dull-
rcildish light, brightened hy oc
casional flames of a blue color.—
Each crucible hold 400 pounds of
metal, and to each crucible were
six men grasping the ealippers hy
which it was to Ho raised. At the
great pot swinging from the crane
were twelve men, six on each side,
each holding a stout wooden bar
fastened crosswise to the iron bar
that went across the pot. Four
men stood with lighted torches to
fire the plugs of cotton waste in the
vents through which the gases must
escape when the flow of metal be
gan. Jean Pischoif, the foreman,
raised a whistle to ills lips and gave
a shrill call, lie then cried in
French—for all the workmen are*
French—“Raise the metal,” and the
seven crucibles went up with una
nimity and precision. “Pour the
metal,” and the contents of each
crucible were poured into tin* big
put. “Pour,” he now shouted like a
maniac. “Fire the vents,” anil the
huge pot was tilted up, half tin*
men raising and half depressing
their bars. The operation of pour
ing was soon over, and the vent
were left as clean and clear as could
lie desired. “It is a good casting,”
said the president, “or there would
have been trouble in one of tin
vents.” General Lee’s head is to
he cast shortly.
UJRJ&SUSh UU'PIUI,
were horn in the year this seal was angers Joined in a hearty congratu-
issuod. * j lation to the newly wedded pair.
“From tills it may he inferred,
then, that the department will get
rid of the old stumps in some way.”
“Probably that is the ease. They
can he utilized very easily in pay
ing postage oil overweight matter
and for other purposes.”
“Will there he any change In
foreign postage ?”
“Nono at all. There could he
none The rate is fixed by the
jwisti 1 union and it could not he
changed,
Macon 7W egraph: The islands
adjacent to Savannah are infested
with negro pirates. Chatham is
worse atllleted with negro outlaws
than any county in the State.
Nothing short of a little “regulator”
work will deliver her good people.
Secretary Chandler has accepted
the highest bids received for the
condemned vessels. The bids ag
gregate |308,273. The appraised
value was $271,300.
Thorn are fourteen prospective
candidates now at work to secure
the seat in tin* Legislature from
Tattnall county.
could not discover any one until he
lifted up his head, when, to his utter
astonishment, he saw a colored man
draw in ids form up in a large gum
tree amid clothes which resembled
abed. The matter was reported to
Mr. J. F. Churchill, who testifies to
tlie darkey’s statement. Tlie bed
is made of moss and old clothes
tied on the brandies of the tree in
order to give a firm support. Old
pieces of blanket and bed clothes
are so arranged that tin* party can
lie down with perfect ease swayed
by the wind.
Bids fur Chandler's Hulks.
Washington, Sept. 24.—The pro
posals for tlie purchase of the con
demned naval vessels were opened
at the Navy department to-day.
Hie following are the vessels locat
ed in tin* South witli the appraised
value and bids: The Savannah, at
Norfolk, is appraised at $10,000. E.
Stnnmml hid $12,403.
The Sea Weed, at Port Royal, S.
C., is appraised at $700. Will. Cut
ler, of Jacksonville, Flo., hid $000;
J. D. Kenny, of Brunswick, Ga.,
$.712, and tlie other bids ranged from
$000 to 070.
The Hliamut, at Norfolk, is ap
praised at 7,300. E. Stannard hid
$8,100;
The Worcester, at Norfolk, is ap
praised at $27,400. E. Stannard hid
$27,011
No bids were received for the
Pawnee, located at Port Royal, S. C.
Itusslaii Kxpertatlou*.
London, September 24.—A dis
patch from Vienna states that Rus
sia is making active military pre
parations along the Austrian and
German frontiers. Tenders have
been asked for 30,000 military beds.
All the railways have been ordered
to have military cars in readiness.
A list lias hoi'ii made of private
steamers in the Black Sea, and their
captains have been ordered to pre
pare for the transportation of am
munition and troops. These vessels
have ceased executing private or
ders and tlie carriage of corn is
thus interrupted. Enormous pro-
For tlie sake of recreation,
Once I aslccil an ex pin nut ion
From a young mini (no relation),
Wliat was mount liy "osenlntlon,”
While I shifted my loentlon
To Invite the sweet sensation.
Well, imagine my vexation
When he gave mo the translation
And Its Latin derivation,
A ml a lot of Information,
Like a pedagogue’s oration,
.lust as if he were at school !—
Wasn’t lie an awful fool? —Puck.
Tlie coins paid for beer are the
bar nickels of society.
What kind of essence does a
young man like when lie pops the
question ? Acquiescence.
Great deal of ill feeling, we under
stand, lias been aroused throughout
tlie whole country hy immature
peaches.
At a fair in New York, they got
out a paper called Satan. A relig
ious young lady who got hold of a
copy, promptly made a bustle of it
saying, “Get thee behind me satan.”
Extract from a letter from An
gelica: “Dkar Henrv—You ask if
I return your love. Yes, Henry, I
have no use for it, and return it
with many thanks. By-by, Henry.”
An Illinois snake charmer gave a
public exhibition with a copperhead
The charm didn’t work, hut the
snake did, and weeks elapsed be
fore the showman knew that he
would recover.
Here is another point in favor of
the Darwinian theory: There is a
boy in Norristown who “sprang
from a monkey.” The monkey be
longed to an organ grinder, and at
tempted to bite tlie boy.
If every man, woman and child
in the United States should each
contribute $28.39, tlie amount would
just equal the National debt. Let’s
pay her off. But don’t let’s begin
this year—some other year.
It’s very easy to start false re
ports. J ust because a woman, while
buying a broom, wanted one with a
heavy and strong handle, it was re
ported around that she was in the
habit of heating her husband,
A Coalville man who cracked a
railroad torpedo with a hammer,
says lie will not repeat the opera
tion “as long as lie lives," and as lie
is not expected to live longer than
three (lays, Ids friends believe him.
A newly married lady was telling
another how nicely her husband
could write. “Oh you should just
see some of his letters.” “Yes, I
know,” was the freezing reply; “I’ve
got a bushel of ’em in my trunk.”
Tableau.
A wag recently showed his opin
ion of a hook he was reading hy the
following lines:
If tliorc should bo another Hood,
For refngo hither fly;
Though all the world should bo submersed,
This book would still be dry.
She tenderly pushed him from
her as they stood in a bay-window
with the soft moonlight falling upon
them and said: “Willie, dear, I
think you had better try some other
hair dye your moustache tastes like
turpentine.”
A young miss of sixteen asks
what is the proper tiling for her to
do when she is serenaded by a party
of gentlemen at late hour. We are
glad to he able to answer this ques
tion. Steal softly down stairs anil
untie the dog.
Recorder—“Witness, did I under
stand you to swear that you saw
the accused at 10 o’clock on Tues
day night on Austin avenue?”
Witness (slightly tight)—“1 can’t
sell wear to it, yor ’onor, hut i’ll bet
yer two schooners o’ beer I sliaw
’im!”
Tlie high-school girl explained
to her particular friend yesterday
Unit “He kicked tin* bucket” was
slang, and that the polite expression
was “I le propelled his pedal extre
mities with violence against a fa
miliar utensil used for the trans
portation of water.”
Advertising is a good thing, but
when a prominent grocer recently
carried to a funeral an umbrella on
which was painted conspicuously
the business of his house, and held
it over the clergyman’s head while
lie read the prayers, the bystanders
thought, lie was running the thing
to the ground.
A family named its sons One
Stickney, Two Sticknoy, Three
Stiekney; and the daughters were
named First Stickney, Second
Stickney, Third Stickney. The
three elder children of another fam
ily wore named Joseph, And, Anoth
er; and it was proposed to call the
vision depots have been established i rest, if any appeared, Also, Moro-
along the frontier, and two army over, Nevertheless, and Notwlth-
c'orps have been distributed lie- standing. Another household nc-
tween tlie Vistula and the Bug tuully named tliolr child Finis, sup-
rivers. A list lias been made of all posing it was the last, hut three
persons who, In the event of war, more were horn, who were called
will he reported from Poland tu the I Addenda, Appendix and Supple-
interior of Russia. ! incut.