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Subscription Itntcs:
One Copy one year - - $2 00
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I > o S I T 1 v E L Y C A S IF.
Volume 2.
Atlanta had a $">0,000 fire on last
Tuesday, occuring this time in the
ilruif house of Howard & Candler,
iiial again from some unknown
riinsc. The building was nearly
totally destroyed.
The Augusta AYws says: Now
that the no fence system has been
adopted by Oglethorpe some of the
foolish negroes of that county are
apprehensive that they will be “put
Pack into slavery.” And those silly
creatures are citizens with the right
to vote and hold office! It is an
outrage.
Augusta Chronicle: Somebody
sends us a Denver Trillion’ which is
full of information, more or less fic
titious perhaps, of Colorado mining
investments. The people of Augus
ta do not desirejioles in the ground
in Colorado. They have about con-
eluded that surplus cash can be bet
ter invested at borne.
/ Wavnesl>oi*o, Gc<)rgia,
V
■v
Friday, October 5th, 1883.
Number 21.
Acts KIkuimI l,j the GiJfcnim'.
An act to establish a city court for
, .... Floyd county.
Atlanta, September 28,-Tho An a( , t to suhmit the question of
^. OV V!l ,,r ..! mS . Si "' 1P<1 ,!' ni1 a rV r °.N e ! 1 prohibition to Floyd county, outshle
the city of Home.
acts since adjourn-
tbe following
ment:
An act to amend the act incorpo
rating Reynolds, in Taylor county.
An act to amend the act creating
the board of police commissioners
for Augusta.
An act to submit the question of
prohibition to the counties of Cobb
and Thomas.
An act amending the law reduc
ing the panel of grand jurors in
Dooly county to one.
An act compelling tax collectors
and treasurers to render account
when called on to the proper officers.
An act to provide against loss by
fire of certain books, the property ot
(The (Tnit (fitizeu.
Advertising Kates :
'l'miiKlml inIvs. piiyublo ill advance.
< Vntnict ad vs. payable quarterly.
I'nun nun lent Inns fur inmwiiiuI benefit will be
elmrued fur as ml vs., payable In advance.
Advs. oeeupyiim special position ( barged 25
per cent, addil Ional.
Notices among reading mailer 10 cents per
line, eaeb Insertion.
Notices In l .deal A- llnsineas column, next to
reading, a cents per line curb insertion.
All notices will be placed among reading
in a tier If not .specially ordered o! her wise.
For terms apply at thlsolUce,
the State, in the bands of county
An act incorporating the Virginia | 0 ffl cers
An act to authorize the issue of
An old Alabama Democrat, in a
letter to the Selma Time.*, suggest?
that our Senators be elected for
twelve years, paid a salary of $20,-
ODil a year, ineligible for re-election,
and forever excluded from the
Presidential chair. Likewise that
tin 1 President be elected by Con
gress, for seven years, and be in
eligible for a second term.
Messrs. Cowing & Clarke, of Cin-
cinnti, write to the Atlanta Const i-
tiition thus: “In closing out our
melon trade with southwestern
Georgia this season, we have sales
mi hand of some ears tlie owners
of which we do not know, never
having received any advices or bills
of lading.” Parties who have fail
ed to receive returns should send
along proper proofs.
The harmony of tlie Democrats
of the great State of New York is
reported to he perfect. If this feel
ing and combination continues to
tlie election of 1884, the Democrats
are assured of victory. It should be
an example to the party throughout
the nation to lay aside all petty
bickerings, and unite as one man
to overthrow a party which revels
in corruption and dishonesty.
The Republican Senate at Jlar-
risburgh, by obstructing the course
of legislation and adopting an un
lawful ultimatum, lias put tlie tax
payers of the State to an unneces
sary expense of $3,000 a day for tlie
last three months. Tlie Senate will
he held accountable for this fact,
and the voters of Pennsylvania will
remember the Republican party
when the day of reckoning comes.
Fred Douglass is certainly laying
his pipes for the second place on
the Republican ticket for 1884.
This puts the Republicans in a
dilemma, for should they refuse to
nominate Freddie for vico-Presi-
ilont then tlie colored vote of the
South will go Democratic, and if
they do nominate Douglass the
white voters of the North will bolt
to the Democrats. This puts them
between two tires, and tlie bloated
otliee seekers of the party, who
have no use for the negro except to
get his vote, are already squirming
like a worm in hot ashes.
The Washington A merican Regis
ter says: “The Chicago editors
must he ambitious to occupy Cabi
net positions, else there is no ac-
eounting for their zeal in Presi
dent making. All of them are
booming somebody. The News
shouts for Arthur; tlie Herald
names Phil. Sheridan; tlie Tribune
entertains a sneaking regard for
Logan, uml tlie Inter-Ocean is get
ting ready to back its choice, and
the air is fall of booms and eloquent
presentations. The job will, how
ever, not be let out to Chicago
editors, and they might as well
give over their ambitions and at
tend to their legitimate business.”
The docket for the Augusta eir-
miit at the approaching term of the
Supreme Court shows tlie following
wises from llurkc:
Murphy versus the Educational
Ihmrd of Burke county (continued)
'lundtunus—li. (). Lovett, J. D. Asli-
1 'n, Salem Dutchcr, for plaintiff in
error, and ,J. J. Jones contra.
Central Railroad versus Allen et
'd ejectment from Burke. Lawton,
Cunningham and Lawton and J. J.
•hnies for plaintiff, and II. fl. 1>.,
Twiggs and Holland contra.
Thomas vs. the State. Perjury I
h'nm Hurkc, Lovett A Hrinson for
plain till', and lioyklii Wright, Solid-i
h>r-<amoral, contra.
Wilkinson Wilson vs. Thigpen; j
claim from Hurkc. Salem Dutoher
Live Stock Mutual Insurance Com
pany.
An act to regulate the publication
of the Supreme Court reports.
An act to prescribe when tlie stat
utes of limitations shall begin to run
against creditors of unrepresented
estates.
An act to amend section 1215 of
the code, so fur as relates to tlie man
ner of receiving pupils into tlie in
stitution of tlie blind.
An act to amend section 3094 of
the code in reference to the fees of
ordinaries.
An act to provide for surveying
lands in certain eases.
An act to change the time of hold
ing tlie Superior Court of Clayton
county.
An act to amend section 4505 of
the code in reference to retailing
spirits without a license.
An act to appropriate money for
legal services rendered in tlie East
man riots.
An act to make it unlawful to tur-
nisli liquor to habitual drunkards
An act giving the owners of stal
lions, jacks and Dulls a lien upon the
get of tlie same.
An act to amend section 2408 of
the code in reference to setting
apart homestead and exemption of
personalty in certain eases.
An act to submit prohibition to
Meriwether county.
An act to prescribe the duties of
deputy clerks of county courts.
An act to amend an act incor
porating the Rome and Chattanoo
ga railroad.
An act to make the tax collector
of Spalding ex officio sheriff .so far as
relates to tlie collection of taxes.
An act to amend section 534 of
the code.
An act to incorporate the Georgia
Loan and Trust Company.
An act prohibiting tlie seining,
boating, netting or catching ilsli
except with hook or line in Emanu
el county.
An act to prescribe a registration
of voters in the town of Quitman.
An act to require butchers in Bibb
county to submit the books required
by law to be kept by them to the
grand juries of said county.
An act to authorize tlie ordinary
of Baldwin county to issue bonds to
retire outstanding bonds falling
due.
. An act to amend the road laws
of this State so far as relates to
Chattooga county.
An act to abolish the office of
county commissioners of Columbia.
An act to amend tlie act prohibit
ing the sale of liquor within three
miles of Masonic Academy in
Emanuel county.
An act to incorporate tlie Mer
chant's Savings Rank of Atlanta.
An act to prevent the running at
large in Howard and Vineville dis
tricts, llibb county, of horses, mules
cattle, etc.
Ail act to prohibit the sale of
liquor in three miles of Riard’s Bap
tist church, on the line of Oglethorpe
and Green counties.
An act to submit the question of
prohibition in the 82!itb district, G.
M., of Floyd county.
An act to authorize the commis
sioners of roads and revenues in
Hurkc county to levy an additional
tax for county purposes.
An act to amend the act creating
a board of commissioners of roads
and revenues in the counties of
Kmanuel, Marion and Johnson.
An act incorporating (lie Canal
Navigation and Land Company.
An act to exempt from jury and
road duty officers and members of
the Baldwin Blues.
Ail act to amend section 4157 of
the code.
An act to prescribe the manner
of producing in any court of this
State any person needed as a wit
ness in a criminal case who is con
fined in the penitentiary or chain-
gang.
An act to provent the discharge
of firearms oil or near public roads.
An act to provide an additional
manner of bringing eases to the
Supreme Court.
An act to create the office of
county administrator.
An act to provide for the payment
Fulmer, (, f tales jurors, whether sworn or
. i serve.
r ‘"‘ Habitin'and II. E. W.
wmtru,
Inman, Administrator, vs. Millar, j An not to make the breaking and , to pay funeral
• lr ; illegality from Hurkc. Salem I entering a railway car with intent Stephens.
1‘utcher for plaintiff, and Hook & j to steal, qr stealing therefrom a fol-
Montgomery contra. } ony.
alias tax ti. fas. in lieu of originals
lost or destroyed.
An act to incorporate the Manu
facturers Mutual Insurance Com
pany.
An act to provide a special lein on
crops in favor of transferees of debts
for rent.
An act to amend section 2481 of
the code.
An act to authorize the Governor
to insure the public buildings of the
State and tlie library.
An act to authorize tlie board of
county commissioners of Bartow to
permit owners of lands on the Eto
wah and other streams to erect gates
on public roads.
An act to supply the deficiency in
the contingent fund appropriating
therefor $10,0(10.
An act incorporating the town of
Jasper inIMckcns county.
An act to amend tlie act incorpor
ating the city of Macon so as to
give the mayor and council the pow
er to grant reprieve and pardon, to
to commute or suspend penalties, to
remit any part of a sentence impos
ed by recorder, and extend the cor
porate limits of said city, to provide
for the erection an lease of a mar
ket house and for other purposes.
An act to appropriate money to
pay the contingent expenses of the
Legislature.
An act incorporating the Plant
ers Loan and Trust Company.
An act incorporating the town of
Bull Ground in Cherokee county.
An act to change the time of hold
ing the quarterly term of the City
court in Augusta.
An act to incorporate the Geor
gia Investment and Banking Com
pany.
An act to provide an additional
mode of foreclosing mortgages on
property in certain eases before the
debt shall become due.
An act to amend section 4578 of
tlie code, prohibiting the running of
freight trains on Sunday.
To amend the act creating the
Railroad Commission.
An act to amend section 3974 of
the code, providing constables sales
under cbattle mortgage li. fas., shall
be advertised ten days instead of
thirty.
An act to repeal section 3974,
which provides for notice to mort
gages in foreclosing mortgages.
An act for the relief of J. E.
McGuire, of.Bartow county.
An act to provide for taxing roll
ing stock and other personal prop
erty of railroads lying partly in this
and partly in other States.
An act to make it unlawful for
owners of any turnpike road or toll
gate to demand toll \\iheii tlie same
is not kept in repair.
An act to appropriate $3,000 for
repairs on the eapitol building.
An act to amend section 1409 of
the code.
An act to prescribe tlie fees of
justices of the peace and constables
in proceedings to disposess intruders
or tenants holding over.
An act to make “Stephen’s United
States Calender” evidence in t li is
State.
An act to amend section 4214 of
the code.
An act to prevent the running at
large of stock etc., in the 318th
and 319th districts of Baldwin coun
ty.
An act to amend the charter of
the State University so as to au
thorize tlie election of tlie Govern
or af the State a member of the
board of trustees.
An act to amend section 344 of
the code.
An act to repeal section 4512 of
the code.
An act to amend section 4097 of
the code.
An net to compel drivers of en
gines to cause trains to stop within
fifty foot of railroad crossings.
An act to amend the charter of
Gainesville.
An act to declare Flint river in
Macon county a lawful fence.
An act to provide a permanent
fund fo • purchasing and binding
books for the State library.
An act to appropriate money for
the stationery accounts of the Leg
islature.
An act making an appropriation
expenses of A. 11.
All act to punish violation
stock law in Monroe county,
An act to incorporate the town of
Fort Valley.
An act to incorporate Turtle and
Altamaha River Canal Company.
An act to incorport te the Mechan
ics Mutual Insurance Company.
An act to amend the first section
of an act “to provide a general law
for the incorporation of railroads.”
An act to amend section 1,347 of
the code.
An act to authorize the Superior
Court of either county to incorpor
ate towns or villages located in
both counties.
An act for the relief of M. L. 1)
Pittman.
An act to make penal the selling
of incumbering personal property
held under a conditional purchase.
An act to amend an act to author
ize tlie Augusta Exchange and the
president and directors of the
Chamber of Commerce of Atlanta
to elect a board of arbitrators, etc.
An act to amend an act incorpor
ating West End, in Fulton county,
An act to compel c mnecting rail
roads to rccieve freights from con
necting lines when tendered in cars.
An act for the relief of O. H. Rob
erts, of Troupe county.
An act to provide means for put
ting to deatli live stock rendered
useless by injriues received from
railroad trains.
An act to amend an act prescrib
ing the mode of granting license to
sell liquor in the counties of.Schley,
Talbot and Green.
An act to appropriate money for
the repair of certain public build
ings.
An act to amend section 3971 of
the code.
An act to provide the driving of
cattle from localities infected with
distemper or infectious diseases.
An act to amend an act to pro
vide for keeping the records of
wild lands.
An act to authorize the commis
sioners of Chatham county to levy
an additional tax for county pur
poses.
An act to amend tlie road laws, so
far as relates to Floyd county.
An act to appropriate certain
money to the Academy of the Blind
for treatment of the inmates of the
institution.
An act to authorize clerks of the
Superior Courts to re-record papers
lost or destroyed by fire.
Ail act to prohibit tlie sale of
liquor in Echols county.
An act to amend the charter of
the Coast Line Railroad Company.
An act to incorporate the Rome
Fire Insurance Company.
An act to repeal section 233 of the
code.
An act to authorize certain parties
to erect gates across the Screven
Island road in Hall county.
An act to supply a deficiency in
the printing fund of tlie Railroad
Commission.
An act to amend an act establish
ing a board of pharmaceutical ex
aminers.
The Governor has approved the
following resolutions since adjourn
ment :
A resolution to relieve from re
sponsibility members of the Gen
eral Assembly who bad in possession
books of tlie State destroyed by tlie
burning of tlie Kimball House.
A resolution instructing the Gov
ernor to furnish 2(10 able-bodied
convicts to the Marietta and North
Georgia railroad.
A resolution allowing pages and
porters of the I louse and Senate ex
tra commission.
A resolution authorizing settle
ment of claims against the tax col
lector and his securities in Telfair
county.
A resolution directing suit against
losses of the Indian Spring reserva
tion.
A resolution to relievo the sure
ties of tlie tax collector of Bibb from
certain penalties.
A resolution to pay It. J. Fitzgib-
bon and Walter 1*. Brown, steno
grapher and sergeant-at-arms em
ployed by the joint committee
to investigate the Marietta .and
North Georgia railroad.
A resolution to provide employ
ment at the eapitol for Ransom
Montgomery.
A resolution authorizing the Gov
ernor to employ an additional night
watchman for the eapitol.
A resolution increasing the sala
ries of the guards and others at the
eapitol.
An act incorporating the Mechan
ics’ and Planters’ Bank of West
Point.
An act to make it the duty of the
principal keeper of the penitentiary
to print a list of the convicts and
make ail annual report to the Gov
ernor.
An act to amend section 2(111 of
tlie code.
An act to establish a system of
public schools at LuG range.
An act to require all railroads in
tills State to (He with the Secretary
of State within twenty days after
notification by the Governor a full
copy of their charter and amend
ments and the names of the princi
pal officers.
The Governor has vetoed tlie fol- j
following bills: Prohibiting tlie rail
road commissioners or their clerk
from acting as council or accepting
fees from railroads, because the bill
prescribes punishment for violating
its provisions unwarranted in the
constitution, namely, removal from
office and disqualification to hold an
office of honor and trust. The Con
stitution provides impeachment for
this purpose, except in eases special
ly therein mentioned.
Also a bill to amend section 1,235
of the code, because of an error not
discovered in its passage, omiting
the words “in a condition mentally
and physically” in describing per
sons entitled to be received in the
asylum of the deaf and dumb for
instruct i >n.
Also a bill to define tlie jurisdic
tion of County Courts, to prescribe
the fees of judges and bailiffs, be
cause section 3 provides certain fees
for bailiffs and certain further pro
visions as follows: “And no other
costs or fees shall be allowed, charg
ed or taken by saidjudge or bailiff.”
it is, to say tlie least, doubtful
whether any cost or fees prescribed
in the code of 1882 for such bailiffs
could be charged by them. In a
matter of such importance in cases
in the County Courts, it is mani
festly unwise to cause the confusion
which would follow the bill.”
Also, a bill to prevent foreign in
surance companies removing suits
to Federal courts, because the re-
quirenonts of the existing laws are
sufficient to protect tlie people
against foreign companies, and the
bill imposes other conditions not
necessary to tlie safety of policy
holders, and harsh to foreign com
panies.
Also a Dill to submit tlie question
of public schools to the voters of
Athens, because section 3 author
izes the mayor and council to issue
bonds without submitting the ques
tion of such indebtedness to the
qualified voters, and without pro
viding for the assessment and col
lection of an annual tax sufficient
to pay tlie principal and interest
within thirty years, as required by
the constitution.
Salile Killies.
of
Atlanta Constitution.
A night or two ago a scene of un
usual interest was witnessed at the
union passenger depot. About
twenty young ladies, just entering
into womanhood, were gathered in
the waiting room, to bid good-bye
to two of their loved associates,
Miss Mattie Holliday and Miss
Mollie Murphy, who were about to
board the train for Savannah,
where they were to enter the con
vent and become members of that
band of self sacrificing women—the
Sisters of Mercy. Tlie spectacle
was one calculated to send a pe
culiar thrill through tlie heart of a
man who was aware of what the two
young ladies were about to do. With
life just opening before them with
all its alluring brightness, they
turned away to don the sable robes
that move iiuliospital wards. To
them life, as the ordinary mortal
makes it,was soon to an end and they
were to take up another life such as
is lived by the sisters who have
forsaken the gayeties of tlie world
and tlie companionship of friends
and relatives for the work that they
fee! is demanded of them.
The young ladies who were left
behind took the parting quite to
heart and many tears were shed as
they separated.
Two weeks ago M iss Annie (>’( 'on-
no r and Miss Nellie McDonald
went to Savannah to join the sister
hood. They had been preeeeded
some months ago by Misses Lizzie
and Annie Mahoney, of Atlanta,
who after their graduation at Ma
con entered the convent from that
city. Several other young ladies
of Atlanta will soon follow those
mentioned. All the young ladies
referred to are accomplished, and
had unusually Driglit lives before
them. They give up much in con
secrating their lives to tlie work
they have undertaken.
A IVniTiil WrapiM.
Mm'im Telegraph.
A stranger exhibited ft pistol at
(he pew depot yesterday alternoon
aliat iji ahead of anything in the
shooting line ever seen in Macon.
It was about eighteen inches long
and was a nine-shooter. In addi
tion to the nine chambers which re
volve there is one barrel with a
tremendous boro which shoots a
cartridge of nine buckshot. 'I he
stranger said it was a Texas navy,
lie wouldn’t have missed it far it
he had said it was the entire Texas
navy.
Subscriptions arc positively cash
(RUHKNT ai.KAMXdS.
Howard* Offered liy the State to lie lterokeil.
Macon Telegraph.
The Governor has issued an
order revoking the rewards offered
lor fugitive criminals before 'Janu
ary 1st, except those already earn
ed, which will be paid.
The Country Improved.
Louisville (Courier-.)nurnal.
M ith no more hazing in tlie col
leges and no more Hayesing in the
| government, this will gradually
grow to be a beautiful country for
immigrants.
A Mistake of tlie Sender.
New York,Oct. 3.—Over five hun
dred letters were posted in this city
Tuesday for foreign countries pre
paid by a two-cent stamp, the par
ties evidently supposing the reduc
tion of postage was general. The
department gives notice that this is
a mistake. The postage to foreign
countries in the universal postage
union remains at five cents.
Sudden Dentil In lYudlcy.
Waiidfy, Ga., Oct. 3.—Elijah
Jones, 77 years of age, a prominent
farmer of this vicinity, came to his
dentil in a sudden manner this
morning. lie arose early, appa
rently in good health, and ate a
hearty breakfast. While in the
horse lot be was seized with a stroke
of paralysis and was carried to the
house, where lie died in a few min
utes.
Suing Ills Father-In-Law.
Stai’df.ton, 11. L, October 3.—Jas.
Fair, of Stapleton, has commenced
a suit against his father-in-law,
Thomas B. Metcalfe, of Stapleton,
claiming $10,000 damages for the
alienation of bis wife’s affections.
Fair and a daughter of Metcalfe’s
were married surreptitiously a year
ago, but have never spent an hour
together since.
A Tight Contract.
The contract for boring the arte
sian well at Montezuma lias been
awarded to Mr. Clay, of Macon, and
the contractor insures ten gallons
per minute for $3,000. Should the
water supply be less than ten gal
lons per minute $200 will be deduct
ed for every gallon short of tlie re
quired amount. But if the flow of
water does not reach five gallons per
minute the Council wiil not receive
it, and the loss then will rest upon
the contractor.
Louisville nud lYudlcy Stockholders Meeting.
Lodjsvii.dk Ga., Oct. 3.—Quite
an interesting meeting of tlie Louis
ville and Wadley Railroad took
place here to-day. After a consid
erable conference, the following
named directors were unanimously
elected: William Donovan, J. G.
Cain, J. C. Little, F. A. Sinquefield,
G. II. Harrell, G. W. Warren and
T. H. Warr. After adjournment
the directors elected William Don
ovan, President; J. G. Cain, Vice-
President; J. C. Little, Treasurer,
and (i. W. Warren Secretary.
HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS.
An Kntcriiristng l’rcuclicr.
Tlie colored people of Buck creek
creek have had trouble with their
pastor, Rev. J. (’. Allen, who dis
ported himself in an unseenly man
ner at a recent eampmeeting. The
trustees decided as follows: “We
tlie leaders and members of the
above mentioned church do make
out a bill of charges against Rov.
J. C. Allen, preacher in charge of
the colored members of the M. E.
church on the Sylvania circuit, for
breaking the Sabbath day by selling
tobacco, cigars and other produce
in the way of gain, which was in
violation of the laws of God and our
country.
A lYunl of {'onimcmlnllon.
.Milwaukee Sentinel.
The people of Georgia have never
advertised themselves as specially
moral—probably there is not a
society for the suppression of vice
in the entire state. Yet in fact
Georgia has done what the nume
rous anti-vice societies of the north
ern states have not even attempted
—Georgia lias positively prevented
the sale within her borders of the
Police (iazette. That demoralizing
and disgusting sheet is hung ill the
windows of news-stands in the
north. It is found in the hands of
young boys and is sold on railway
trains, and nobody undertakes to
interfere with its sale.
A Altiniiini'iit Erected liy Nature.
Hartwell Hun.
In the centre of the main street
in Hartwell, in front of Hubbard
Brown’s store, is a green spot of
grass not larger than a water buck
et that is green winter and summer,
in April, 18(15. when General
Brown s brigade of plunderers pas
sed through Hartwell, robbing rich
and poor after they knew peace
was declared, one of tlie vandals
siiot down Dr. Janies M. Webb, uni
uf the kindest-hearted and most
successful physicians that ever
practiced in this county. His
heart’s blood poured out where this
litio green spot appears in tin
street, and although thousands of
wheels have passed over it it looks
Just as it did eighteen years ago,
SI'AKKING SUNDAY NIGIIT.
Hitting In the corner
i)n a Sunday eve,
With a taper Anger
Resting on your sleeve:
Starlight eyes are casting
(in your face the light—
llless me! this pleasant,
Sparking Sunday night.
How your heart Is thumping
’Uulnst your Sunday vest,
How wickedly ’tls working
i >n this day of rest;
Hours seem hut minutes
As they take their flight—
llless me! ain’t it pleasant,
Sparking Sunday night.
“I’ii" and “mn” are sleeping
(in tin lr peaceful bed,
Dreaming of the things
The folks In meeting said;
“Dove ye one another!”
Ministers recite;
llless me! don’t we do It,
Sparking Sunday night?
One arm with gentle pressure
Dingers ’round her wulst,
You squeeze her dimple hand,
Routing lips you taste;
She freely slaps your face,
More In love limn spite;
Thunder! ain’t it pleasant,
Sparking Sunday night?
When a man can make right out
of wrong lie will bo able to breed
colts from horse chestnuts.
If a great big man calls you a liar
treat him with silent contempt. Do
not, however, make your contempt
too conspicuous.
A grocer bad a pound of sugar
returned with a note attached to it
saying, “Too much sand for table
use, and not enough for building
purposes.”
A New Jersey young man, who
tackled Professor Sullivan in a
friendly bout, now wears tlie licit.
He wears it just over the left eye,
and feeds it oil raw beef.
Mrs. Summerbreeze’s new girl
was told lo watcli tlie turnover a
few minutes; when tlie lady return
ed tlie turnover was burned to a
crisp, and tlie girl remarked, “Sure,
I’ve watched it, muni; but it hasn’t
turned over yet.”
An old negro woman, praying for
a certain slanderer, said: “Ob, Lord,
won’t you be kind enough to take
tlie door of bis mouth off, and when
you put it on again just bang it on
the gospel hinges of peace on earth
and good will to men ?”
“Can you give me a bite or two?”
asked the tramp. “Certainly,” re
plied the farmer. “Here, Towser,
Towner!” “Never mind said the
tramp, as he cleared tlie wall.—
“Don’t go to any trouble about it. I
thought you had it handy. I’m not
very hungry now, anyhow.”
“Wind’s that bell ringing^for?”
asked a man who had just arrived
in a Southern town. “Prominent
citizen dead, sir,” replied tlie in
habitant. “Well, I hope he’ll stay
dead. I’ve been traveling over this
country all summer and haven’t
met anybody but prominent citi
zens, and tlie fact that one of them
is actually dead gives me great en
couragement.”—.4 r ban saw Traveler
Mr. Isaacs keeps a clothing store,
in front of which lie is generally to
be found, pouring forth an eloquent
disquisition on the merits of his
stock. Yesterday, while he was so
employed, Jacob happened to be
passing, and caught the words:
“Nice glean sliirds inside; tlie
nicest sliirds in the city!”
“Veil, Isaacs, vot vos dot you
say ?”
“Nice glean sliirds inside.”
“Veil, for heaven’s sake, go right!
in uiul put von oil your pack, mine
friondt!” exclaimed Jacob.
“What have you got for dinner?”
inquired a disgusted drummer of
the waiter. The drummer had been
in tlie town twenty-four hours with
out taking an order.
“Roast duck, sir.”
“Ab! was the duck shot on the
wing?”
“I guess so.”
“Trying to get away from tills
cussed place?”
“1 presume likely enough, sir.”
“Good bird; sagacious fowl; rura
avis. I admire his pluck and pity
bis misfortune. You may bring me
that duck, i’ii take tlie whole of
him. I’ll help him along on tho
road.”—Texas Siftings.
Old Hi was asked by one of our
merchants: “Hi, do you know a
darkey by tho name of Davis?”
“Hisaro Davis will de red eye, dat
got burned in de riber ’sploshing?"
“Yes, lie’s the man.”
“Well, I knows him.”
“is li(> reliable?”
“Oln’lly, but it ’pends moughty on
de blzncss dot lie’s ’gaged in at do
time.”
“What business would he suit
best in as day porter ?”
“Well, ter tell ye do llat-footed,
unsophisticated trufe, dar’s one
place whar ills nlggar could wuck
an’ bo ez hones’ cz de day—an’ dut's
ez purler in or real ’state stu’l In
dat case de owner’ll be liable tor
fine de, propurty alius where lit* lef’
it!”