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THE MAGAZINE PAGE
Daysey. May me
and Her Folks
THE JOY OF BEING ADAM.
By FRANCES L. GARSIDE.
IT is a wonder -that the scientists,
and those alarmists who pose as
> such, have never noted the pern:- ,
, clous effects of . <s .line.
This commonly use article ha
most deleterious effi ct on human be- .
Ings. When taker, in whiff from theit
»wr .atom. bil« - it sp°edilj reduces j
their mental ability to that of a mum-
I my.
It impairs the memory! After a
'* man or woman has taken thest whiffs
from hie or her nun car for as Inns .is
six weeks, not a vestige of memory
remains.
/' Tn Illustrate When the Appletons
owned a buggy with a flat who'| t
which they drove i spavined horse, and '
Bi asked a friend to go riding thr-•< weeks I
from next Monday 'hev appear'd with
the buggv with the flat wheel and the
I spavined horse prompt!' - on time.
Now that they own an .automobile, if
? they ask a friend to go -iding tomor
row, thev havi forgotten ere the suq
sets today that pitch an >ng.agenvnt
was ever made •
Daysey Mayme Appleton, who takes
. everything in its most aggravated
: form, from measles t<> love, finds-her
’ memory so badly impaired that she for
[ gets not only her friends, but her own
f father.
"I am not sorry.” he said, when the
| ear had left without him. 'The inci
dent selves as further proof of the .Toy
of Being Adam. There were no auto-
.mobiles in 1 : da -
|k “Adam,” he continued, ‘.'missed many
of the torment, of today. How many
■anen are-told everv night by their com
plaining wives, '1 wish you could be in
W shoes for Just one Lr !' Adam
never heard it, for the r< -.on that Kv.
didn’t wear any.
The Good Old Days.
"When Adam gave his wife a present
r there were no kin or neighbors to
suspect, it was a peace offering.
L "He never came home from work so
F tired that he could trip on a pin. to be
met with the demand from his wifi that
I he dress up and take her into society.
“He did not break hts finger nails
l hooking her dress up the back, like the.
hookworm the man of today has be
. eome, and he did not haw big dr< s-
[ making hills for his wife, while his own
clothes were fit for nothing on earth hut
| to go blackberrying in.
ft "Neither did he ever wear such neg
■; leeted looking ■ loth' ■ that ho looked
' like a hook the baby has played with.
P. “He never Ip-td toi.-nn in the spring
S. . to estimate that he had eaten fifteen
| ' yards of bacon and a carload of fried
potatoes in the winter past, his wife
I having too little time left from soci.
I tv’s demands to cook anything < ho.
“There were no parlors in his days,
consequently no parlor lounge, and con
sequently no cushions on which ho tried
J 7 > to rest his weary head only to'be re
minded that they are ton show, not for
I use.
I “He did not t-.t irve tn death trying to
be a satisfactory host at a dinner ta
j ble; neither did he rattb down to
posthumous fame .... 'Evi's husband.'
I “His wife made no jealous inquiries
j Into bls past. Then being no bats
( f those days, he w.c pared the question
■ that always greet ■ the modern hu
• hand when he picks up his hat. And I
L that question 1-. 'When are you go- |
| Ing?’
“His clothes took up no room in the -
I Closet and he becatm a model husband |
W in one shining particular without es
1
No Wife m Curl Papers
Ji-- "He never -aw Ev. with hairpins fr.
. her mouth! And bis !>v w a st-ircd
the disillusion of a w if. in • nr' :
£'- “His wife never comp’..deed that hr- ;
| had to 'pl< k up' after him. Xml b< '
; never had cold chills isr.i bv ben
. compelled to give Ev hardarn. d
I money, knowing In w ould cri y it
I carelessly tn a pocketbook. and have
- it on the flrot count. :- li. i. i.-hed
S “Eve never attended m. . ting- called I
I to discuss The s•< 'Cs'o -- ~f th. Men.' .
’£ and her 'manner of . ..m . into t>> ,
j world effectually barrel i from tin j
I te privilege of bo, tine about h.-r kin ”
, Eysander John stopped ami slg'md ;
Necessarily ther. w is • inch in Tv .1 >\ |
| of Being Ada; that : v. . Th. Sorrow j
1 of Being Lys iirkr .1 ■' t
I ■ With the thought • • . -nt .-nobii. ■
In mind, and tn. -t rur.r.mg
and the growing < xtrav lean- . -f w n
1 en of today, he concluded •
"And Eve never w.. w -man w
a thought it risri.t f r . n. t
8. egg for making a <k. '
jf Nadine Face Powder
{ln Green Boxes Only.)
1 Alak-.-s the Complexion Bcautiiu!
Soft and Velvety
/ zurA’ ' s
/ \ It •
Z *?F-\ Harmless
'* I ■- \ Q 4 Afo*o'■ '■ > >
r
f Ils. >- ’' Cz ■ / Tbe sost ’ xi
W’teai / a Pr ri ’-'’ •'
».■ . \”>’ 7-.'<. / der is waile.l .
Purified by 4 r.i >
»unburn and return of discolorations,
the increasing popularity is wonderful
White, Flesh, Pink, Brunette. By
toilet counters or mail. Price 50 cents.
NATIONAL TOILET COMPANY. Paris. Im.
From the factory direct
to you. This means, quality
! considered, best Piano val
ues for the least money.
CABLE PIANO CO.,
84 North Broad-st.
< o<] Love’s Labor Lost Coprcght. ild-. AaliCLal hews Aesc-ttation — By Nell Brinkley [x> | i
. - : - —1 Ty -.c.-.j-t: 7
®O: ' . - ' A 4 ,a
jWpfr^ l
Mb r’'”V " " ;7
'W llfc ■ 11A A' J
wife'' • ■'l™ w. L ■■
Jk* ■ ? Wff 1 ,' ! . TT"
Bre s'
X* > -'I i -
' “T'E ;
■■■ ' « ■■ cOmA
a.". Vs. "C . ■ :v7... 1 .--: .cr.r ■’ s *' ' ' J
_ _....... ■ '• *
Even Cupid Can Be Fooled bv a Maid with a Heart of Stone,
1 he Manicure
Lady
By WILLIAM F. KIRK.
J HAITI .in.-1 came bark from a
i I trip | ( > the count'.. said th?
.Minutin I.mly '‘Goodness
! ”*>" ■i yr I hatto ■.< vi- it.
Tl" tmmimry i pie always maki-.-you
f‘ < .-• ■ at batne. Tb*rc ain't any taxi
■ .it' tlu'ri . ur any sy ksi capers. or any
ai<h. i; i.t the corner, but the home
cool nr; >. ■x> client, ami you can get
lie I■ i ■ countrv air you want,
.Ami think ot .11 them little flashes In
tin l.ttji brooks, ano the flora fauna
in thi tiers, George "
111 bet you don't know what flora
i'aii'i.i i . kiddo," ?aid the skeptical
| H ’ad Barber.
' It i.» some- kmd of trectoa;!, George."
i • i cd tin Manicure Lu v "They are
it!" fuimi'-t. little tiling you ever
i ■• 11 The landlord's son found one for
■ d br. > \\ dfred. It was green.
■ • t'iey couldn't see it among the
j leaves if they wanted to shoot it. The
I amilord .m w.i never in the city,
'ai d lin't smart like us folks,
w awful kind. 11" showed me
T ■ •■ ■ d ,11 over tin p!.i ■ i>m of
' " dm: he showed u. was a running
I animal called a wampus. He
cd that it always lived on a side lull
■" , a t o’ trn- fact. <;< urge, t bnt its
'. ' right bgs 'was sir ' • than its
' - ill’ ■ Ami he explained that
' ' :iil the time on tin right of the
1h 11 tlway s had to walk
t . ' a<l. He - iid it couldn't
: ■ ' > "ii.d, .. >it kept walking."
"I’m ■ ted you a;i that’.’" inquired
• • grinning IL id Barber.
"t b: i >ti. y . >•!. i le.'rge, and I
t ' • i 1 .• tor yon to be grill
’d: co .-I t It one of them
’ am ■> lad; wants to be nice
■' oik that has had morel
i 1 •him. and mere education.
’ d '■'.■■!. " r. ■me ■ t r out' bus mess
' 1 • : ‘ I’m of him.
" 'h’i' thing hr showed me and
' -l-i imanl spring. He said
«ih< water tn if
isky. and that in
d tp sulphur and
1 nd. thr w ays that i
g < are of them in- j
there- You see. I
’’A'.md ’o'ahlJ
n's like wo can, so j
| Xatu • ■ 'OV them just 'like ;
1 the 1 ■ '' ' - ■ i-t t. king y>u |
nmg ab. mt ■ ■ . • w--i.lt iiink you
wits a- ■i ; ■ 'i.i fellow that
showed us ay. . ■ • •here."
"1 don't bl . ■ - ■ grinning." de. i
glared the H- R irber • ’v. as'
stringing you '
"You're dippy" . > -r.-.i the Mani
cure Eady "Ini'' anybody from a
Small town string ■ ; a city girl."
I ADVICE TO THE LOVELORN * By Beatrice Fairfax ]|
BY NOT WANTING IT.
Dear Miss Fairfax:
I have know n a man for three years,
with whom I am deeply in love. I used
to think he loved me. but. lately I can
not understand his aetions toward me.
I am acquainted with his sister, and
when I go to see her and h“ is there he
ti'i'it.- me vi'i'y nicely and walks home
with me. T alwavs ask him to cal! and
he always savs, "Yes," but.never comes.
Could you tell me ht>w to win his love?
BEATRICE O.
Don't go to see his sister; if by any
chance you see him, don't ask him to
call. If he asks to call, plead a prom
is'd engagement and let him ask a. sec
ond ti ro . And don't,.dear, feel badly if
he never comes back. You deserve a
man who loves without coaxing, and
this man is not that kind
ASK FOR AN EXPLANATION.
Dear Miss Fairfay:
I am 24 and have been deeply in love
with a young lady four years older than
myself. - have known each other
over three’ veils. For two years and a
half wo have been engaged. Eight
months ago we did not write each othrt
as often as usual and she soon stopped
Stories About Words;
1
It las been decided by Australian
magistrates that eggs are not "mis- ,
■• ■ " Yet S:i James Murray define: .
■ t missile as anything "capable of being
thrown from the hand or from a ma
chini or engine." Egg are capable of
bein ; thrown. "Missies," like "villain."
a w ■ hi originally pleasing and re- ■
!<■ tabb that has changed for the
worse in the course of the centuries.
"Misi-ilia" were the sweets and per
fum- .■ thrown by the Roman emperors
among the peop lv . and a "missile" afid
t "mission" are only things sent.
"Ballot" and. "Suffrage" show how |
■ language perpetuates the memory of I
primitive emthods. A "ballot" should j
:He a vote taken with balls one of the i
v iri.' i- ancient Greek instruments of
-■•ent vaiing. And the word "-us-l
i frage." which by some is derived from j
lUffrnvii." a. knickle bone or ankh :
• -m. in that case recalls an early ;
j method of recording the vote.
In early times "blackguard" was b'. ,
no mean.'- a term of reproach, but re
ferrei'l to the lowly but honorable priv-
.•-go f carrying coal in the king's ;
| household.
writing at all. I have written the last
three letters, but have received no an
swer. HOPEFI’L LYNX.
These half-engagements are n. v<".
desirable. If she dues not write, and
shows no apprehension when you don't,
she no longer cares for you. Go to hev
and ask for your relations to he estab
lished on the old tooting, or broken off.
Either would be rtiore just to you than
this dilly-dallying.
HIS TEMPER NOT THE BEST.
Dear Miss Fairfax:
I am seventeen .and have made the
acquaintance of a. man six months my
senior. We have been very intimal'
until a short while ago. when 1 invited
him to my home and then had to post
pone the engagement. Since then he
has treated me very coolly. How can I
win his affection back again?
DISAPPOINTED.
If he grows angry and sulks on such
small provocation, can voft persuade
fycicciUM'iictf!
Against “ Against s
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I vourself that a marriage to such a man
: would, result m.happiness?
If he i ’.ang'v. let him stay angry
until he gets over it. Don’t apologize,
don't coax, don't be humble.
Make him realize In is in the wrong.
■ and that you don't like the way he acts.
PERHAPS HF. IS UNABLE TO
WRITE.
Dear Miss Fairfax.
I am sixteen and 'lately made the
i, lua'intam.b •!'a man of about twenty.
Recently he weitt on a visit, and he
sent me , ards while away, telling me
hr would 1" home on a certain day.
He told ine not to wrife until I heard
from Idin. Later I went to a ball and
saw his brother there, who told mo my
friend was> sick. Now. do you think-he
. -:,s tor me, as I haven't heard from
hi>e ' FRANCES J.
A man who is sick physically rs never
love-sick at the same time, and no
. doubt his iline os'h as driven qll thought
of you out of JiisSriind. Don't misjudge
him if you do not h-ar from him. If
.—WMB i. l Wl :l i'HU « . I RIWtU' J' ■' W-—»'» ■.■llß'JJ
he recovers and never writes, make up
your mind to forget him A girl of
sixteen has too many opportunities
ahead of her to mourn over one man. |
J? de l/l
r//j7
\ O 0 1 'Y
ESSHS3SSTOt o, o 0 o Bz
Anty Drudge on the Farm.
Zifrs. Farmer—“l ’spose all you fine city folks are ’way
ahead of us who live in the country.”
Anfy £>rwdge—‘‘Goodness, no. Mrs. Farmer. I see you
use Fels-Naptha; your hands are white and you have
plenty of time for reading and music. You can’t get
ahead of the woman who uses Fels-Naptha, whether
she lives in the country or city. ” »
Do women cling to delusions longer
than men? That’s an open question. In
(Tina, men do the washing and they have
been d-oing it in the same old way for
4,000 years.
In America more than a million
women have broken away from the old
fashioned traditions, and have adopted the
Fels-Naptha way of washing. That means
cold or lukewarm water —never hot —no
boiling, no hard rubbing, a saving of time,
temper, trouble, fuel, clothes and health.
**
Follow directions on the red and green
wrapper.
Gettine On In
Life
NO. 4—WRITING ENGLISH.
By THOMAS TAPPER.
The popular custom of keeping a di
ary is a useful one, even if the boolt
when filled is never to be printed. Its
usefulness consists in this: That the
habit of writing something every day.
even if it is not more than a report
about the weather, leads to exactness.
And if the writer has any pride, It will
lead not only to exactness, but to neat
ness, and certainly to regularity of ac
tion.
Practice writing is not foolish, par
ticularly if your alm is to improve your
use of English. Few people know how
hard it is for well known authors to
produce a page of writing that reads
easily. Charles Dickens went over every
sentence he wrote time and time again,
and his manuscript was full of erasures
and additions. Buffon, the French
naturalist, wrote one of his books fif
teen times, not by means of a typewrit
ing machine, hut with his own hand.
Some authors have made it a custom to
carry a note book and Jot down any
thought they care to consider again.
From the note book they found matter
for their writing.
The fact is. few great writers have
written easily. They have had to grasp
the thought whenever it came, to jot it
down in the rough, and then to polish
and perfect it afterward. They work
exactly as a man does who is carding a
figure from a piece of marble. He suc
ceeds because he keeps on chipping the
marble with his hands, and watching
the model in his mind all the while.
You may never be obliged to do much
writing, but if you want to be a clear
thinker, you can at least do this: Write
out from memory what you remember
about a chapter you have been reading.
Or, take a newspaper article you like,
read it two or three times, put it aside,
and then try to write it out in the
shortest form you can.
Benjamin Franklin, born in February.
1706. was a master hand at this kind of
writing. Ho 'tells us in his autobiogra
phy exactly how he did it:
I mot with an odd volume of the
SPECTATOR. It was the third. I had
never before seen any of them. I
bought it, read it over and over, and
was much delighted with it. I thought
the writing excellent, and wished, if
possible, imitate it. With this view I
took some of the papers, and. making
short hints of the sentiment in each,
sentence, laid them by a few days, and
then, without looking nt the book, tried
to complete the papers again, by ex
pressing each hintfif sentiment at
length, and as fully as it had been ex
pressed before, tn any suitable words
that should copie to hand. Then I com
pared my SPECTATOR with the origi
nal, discovered some of my faults, and
corrected them. Rut I found I wanted
a stock of words, of a readiness in rec
ollecting and using them, which I
thought I should have acquired before
that time if 1 had gone on marking
verses; since the continual occasion for
words of the sam° import, but of dif
ferent length, to suit the measure, or if
different sound for me rhyme, would
have laid me under a constant necessity
of searching for variety, and also have
tended to fix that variety in my mind,
and make me master of it. Therefore.
I took some of the tales and turned
them into verse: and, after a time,
when I had pretty well forgotten the
prose, turned them hack again. I also
sometimes jumbled my collection of
hints into confusion, and after some
weeks endeavored to reduce them into
the best order, before I began to form
the fun sentences and complete the pa
per. This was to teach me method in
the arrangement of thoughts.