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UUtlc sV'cirs.
TRENTON, GEORGIA.
Tfiie famous bread of Turin, known as
Grassini, through its inventor, is a pecu
liar feature of foreign life lately intro
duced here by a Swiss cook.
The Rev. Nathan Smith, of Ackworth,
Ga., has preached the Gospel for moro
than fifty years, lie is a well-preserved
old gentleman of seventy liye.
Cats are found to be the best extermi
nators of rabbits in New Zealand. They
do great havoc among the young ones,
and in some sections scarcely a rabbit is
to be seen.
Parisians have been amusing them
selves with a “Ham Fair,” at which
booths were filled with sausages, hams
and lard, and are now enjoying a “Gin
gerbread Fair,” say the correspondents.
Plantations of roses on a large scale
are to be established in the Caucasian
provinces of Kutais, with a view to in
troducing there the manufacture of attar
of roses, for which Russia now has to
depend upon Bulgaria and Turkey.
't he Russian census reports slate that
the population of the Empire is 109,-
000,000. There were 40,204 deaths by
violence, 02,000 fires, 3371 distilleries,
132,000 wine and beer shops. 245 sugar
refineries, 8 universities, 38,531 Ortho
dox churches, 1287 Catholic, 708 Prot
estant, 349 synagogues, and 3957
mosques
An alien may vote in Wisconsin,
Minnesota, Alabama, Arkansas, Colo
rado, Florida, Indiana, Kansas, Louisi
ana, Michigan, Missouri, Nebraska, Ore
gon and Texas. Residence in the State
for three months only is required in
Michigan. Minnesota and the other
States require either six or twelve months.
In the other States only citizens are per
mitted to vote.
Since the war, remarks the Scientific
American , the Yankee sailor has gradu
ally disappeared, there being no more
excitement or prize money in the life;
though there is good reason for the be
lief that the fact that he could, because of
his intelligence, earn more money ashore
had much to do with his quitting the
sea. At the present time the Yankee
man o’-war’s man is almost as extinct as
the dodo.
More than half of the people of the
United States—men, women and chil
dren—wear shoes that come from Bos
ton. That is ihe headquarters of the
boot and shoe industry for the whole
country —the centre from which the
marketable product of the great manu
facturing towns thereabout is dis
tributed. The population of these towns
is chiefly made up of workers in the
huge shops, which turn out foot gear at
the rate of nearly 100,000,000 pairs
every year.
“ Since Mrs. Cleveland became the
President’s wife,” says the Chicago
Herald, “she has to wear gloves two
sizes larger than she wore before she was
married. Her left hand is very little if
any larger, but the right hand, which
has done so much shaking in its official
capacity, is noticeably larger than the
other, and she recently told a friend that
it was impossible for her to wear her old
number in gloves. The same is proba
bly true of the President, but as men
wear their gloves so much looser than
women, he might not know it by that
means, but if he compares his two hands
he will see a difference. ”
It has been decided to mark the spot
in the old hall of the bnited States House
of Representatives where ex-Iresident
John Quincy Adams, then a member of
the House, fell stricken with appoplexy
on February 21, 1845. The architect of
the Capitol has been able to locate the
exact spot then occupied by Mr. Adams’s
desk, by which he was standing when
he was stricken down, and he has pre
pared a small round bronze table bearing
the inscription: “John Q. Adams,
February 21, 1845,’’and in the center the
word “Here,” which will be fixed in the
tiling of the floor. This will appear like
answering a roll call.
I
The New York branch of the Hydro
graphic Office of the United States Navy
has received reports from some twenty
sh.pca, tains who recently sighted whales
in the waters near the coast from the
Grand Banks to Cape llatteras. Captain
Owens, of the steamship lowa, saw eight
large whales in one day, in north lati
tude forty-two, west longitude sixty
one. A great number of large whales
were seen in the course of a day’s sail
ing by Captain Fox, of the steamship
Istrian. Others repoit schools of large
sperm whales moving in various direc
tions. The object of this record is to
study the movements of whales and other
sea fishes. It has been ascertained that
the temperature of the water has an im
portant influence upon their movements,
and an especial study will be made with
mackerel, in the hope of ascertain
ing data that Will solve the question why
they are so abundant one season and so
ecarce the next.
The Washinton Star asks: “What in
duces the great parties nowadays to
nominate their young, healthy, vigorous
men for President and give the Vice-
Presidential nominations to veterans
whose age creates a presumption against
their surviving their chiefs? Grant at
his second nomination was 10 years
younger than Wilson; Hays was 3 years
younger than Wheeler; Garfield was 1
year younger than Arthur; Hancock was
2 years younger than English; Blaine was
4 years younger than I.ogan; flew land
was 18 years younger than Hendricks,
and is 24 ye irs younger than Thurman,
and Harrison is 9 years younger than
Morton. Th ■ only exceptions to the rule
since the war have been Grant’s seniority
of 1 year over Colfax, Seymour’s of 11
over Blair, Greeley’s of 15 years over
Brown, and # Tilden’s of 5 years over
Hendricks. It would appear that the
American people prefer the illogical to
the logical arrangement; as, in this
whole list of cases where the candidate
for President lias been older than his
companion on the ticket, only one has
been seated in the White House, and the
difference in his favor was ,but a single
year.”
Mr. R. L. Stodda d, of California, said
to a reporter of the St. Louis Post-Dis
patch: “There is one thing that puzzles
me, and that is why Eastern people will
persist in calling Sau Francisco by that
abbreviated distortion: ‘Frisco.’ 1 think
the idea must have originally emanated
from the brain of some dime-novel ro
mancer. They invariably have it “Frisco”
in light literature until people east of the
Rocky mountains have come to believe
that an off-hand use of the name implies
familiarity with the Pacific coast and the
life there. The opinion of the correct
ness of the abbreviation has no doubt
been materially strengthened by the ex
ample set in a big railroad system adopt
ing the title as a pet one, but this does
not excuse the mistake. San Francisco
is a beautiful name, and should be given
the benefit of every syllable. It is much
more euphonious and creditable to the
town, but what I started out to say was
that ‘Frisco’ is positively incorrect, and
is never applied by those to the manner
born. There is a little town up in the
California hills by this name, and if peo
ple referred to it when they said
‘Frisco’ it would be well enough. But
they don’t,* and I suppose they never
will.”
Musical prodigies have become numer
ous during the last year in various parts
of the world. Philadelphia has the
honor of bringing the latest to the front.
This is Master J. Miller, son of the late
E. Spencer Miller, formerly a celebrated
lawyer of that city. At an exceedingly
tender age Master Miller evinced a won
derful love for music. Before his musi
cal studies had progressed far the yorng
virtuoso turned his attention mainly to
organ playing, with the result that it
would be difficult to find his superior on
that instrument. The Record , in speak
ing of him, says: “About last Eastdf%e
regular organist of St. Clement’s Episco
pal Church was called away and young
Miller was asked to take his place. His
playing on the magnificent organ in this,
the largest Episcopal church in the city,
has elicited great admiration and sur
prise. The handsome, golden-haired
boy of thirteen years renders the most
difficult and intricate church music
without the slightest wavering. His
qpmmand of the instrument and the
technical skill displayed are marvelous
in one so young, and would be worthy
of many of the most celebrated organ
ists.”
The New York Graphic says: “Now
that Benjamin Harrison is a candidate
for the Presidency, it is probable that
the Legislature of Ohio, if it has a
chance, will pass a bill which in one
shape or another has been before it for
the last quarter of a century. It pro
vides for the erection of a suitable monu
ment over the remains of William Henry
Harrison, President of the United
States, and grandfather of Benjamin.
His remains lie in a little brick vault at
North Bend, some miles below Cincin
nati. And this recalls the fact that the
burial place of all the men who have
teen Presidents of this country are
widely scattered. Washington lies at
Mount Vernon, the two Adamses are
buried in the old family church at
Quincy, Mass.; Jefferson rests at Monti
cello; Madison’s grave is at Montpelier,
Va., not far from where Jefferson sleeps;
Monroe's remains lie in the ceme
tery at Richmond, Ya.; Jackson’s grave
is in front of his old residence, “The
Hermitage," in Kentucky ; Van Bureu
was buried at Kinderhook, near the fa
mous little creek that sweeps dow n into
the Hudson; Polk lies in the Nashville,
Tenn., cemetery; Taylor rests in a coun
try graveyard near Louisville, Ivy.; Fill
more’s remains are in Forest Lawn Ceme
tery at Buffalo; Pierce sleeps in a quiet
weed grown cemetery just outside of
Concord, N. 11.; Buchanan found his
last abiding place on earth among his
neighbors at Lancaster, Penn.; Lincoln's
grave is near Springfield, 111.; Johnson’s
at Greenville, Tend.; Garfield’s at Cleve
land, O.; Grant's at Riverside, and Ar
thur’s at Albany.”
Judge Story was at Harvard at fifteen,
in Congress at twenty-nine, and Judge
of the Supreme Court of the United
States at thirty-two.
! WAITING FOR THE BUGLA
We wait for the bugle; the night dews are
cold,
1 The limbs of the soldiers feel jaded and old.
The field of our bivouac is windy and bare,
; There is lead in our joints, there is frost in
our hair,
The future is veiled and its fortunes un
known
As we lie with hushed breath till the bugle is
blown.
At the sound of that bugle each comrade shall
spring
lake an arrow released from the strain of the
string:
The conrage, the impulse of youth shall come
back
To banish the chill of the drear bivouac,
And sorrows and loss *s and cares fade away
When that life-giving signal proclaims the
new day.
Though the bivouac of age may put ice in
our veins,
And no fiber of steel in our sinew remains;
Though the comrades of yesterday’s march
are not here,
And the sunlight seems pale and the branches
are sear,—
Though the sound of our cheering dies down
to a moan,
We shall find the lost youth when the bugle
is blown.
—Thomas W Ht'gginson, in the Century.
MISS CLEO'TnEGATIVE.
“Most through, Cleo?”
“Yes; almost, In ten minutes I shall
have fini-hed.” The young peison ad
dressed is sitting with her back to her
si-ter, and all the face aud half of the
head is hidden by the hood of a retouch
ing frame. She is leaning eagerly for
ward. Her eyes are riveted on the nega
tvc before her, and her deft, dainty
fingers are making swift, magic strokes
on the work under her hand. “In ten
minutes more,” the sweet musical voice
repeats; “and when I’ve done I shall
place before your astonished gate some
thing too utterly lovely, my Lady Jane.
Then Janet Heath lifts her head
wearily from the cushions of her invalid
couch, aud sighs impatiently. Cleo’s
quick ear catches that sigh instantly.
“Are you in pain, Janie?”
“No; not particularly. Only think, I
dare not read aloud to you any more. I
begin to think that comical genius Sir
Boyle Roche, was exceedingly correct
when he said that ‘ the greatest of all
calamities was generally followed by one
much greater.’ It seems so, actually.
Oh, dear, dear! Why doesn’t some good
fortune befall us now, I wonder? Why
don’t some of our rich relatives hunt us
up and insist on making us a present of
a few hundreds? They could easily af
ford to do it; and only think what a
godsend it would be to us!”
“Well, for your sake, Janie, I sin
cerely wish they would. Then you could
have that operation performed on your
eyes at once, and I should be able to
get you all the nice, nourishing food
that the doctor lecommendcd, and that
fine wine that he said you ought to .
Now, see this!” and she handed Miss
•Janet the negative.
“Yes,” Miss Janet says, after regard
ing the negative critically, “you cer
tainly have done splendid work upon it,
and it is really au exceedingly nice face;
but I have seen you retouching many
and many a one that was far hand
somer.”
“Well, I will admit all that,” the girl
answers, receiving the negative back and
gazing down at the face. “Still this one
has interested me greatly ever since I
began working fin it. But, good
gracious, this won* do! Only look at
all the time I’ve been wasting! I must
scramble into my things and take this
work to the Gallery at once,” she breaks
forth suddenly.
Then she flies to the closet, takes out
a very odd, quaint poke bonnet, ties it
on, and, catching up the package of
well-done work, hurries to the door.
“Well, Janie, here I am at last!” Cleo
exclaimed an hour later, flashing into
the cool, dark room in a breathless sort
of way, with her cheeks much deeper in
color than when she left, and a pair of
Wiid, oddly excited eyes. Then, putting
away her “things,” she sits down in a
very stiff-backed chair, and fans her hot
cheeks furiously.
“Well, Janie, do you know the most
romantic incident has occurred this after
noon' lieally, I do actually begin to
think there must have been some one
around practising black art, whatever
that may be. There, now r , don’t com
mence to lose your patience, and I’ll
begin and tell you the whole odd occur
rence right from the start. I went to
the Gallery first, of course, and gave in
my work and got my money, all of it—
three big, round dollars, if you please.
Then I went to the market to get some
thing nice for you. From there I went
over to Mr. Norton’s drug store, and I
told him I wanted a flask of his very
best wine, and I w r antcd it just as cheap
as he could let me have it, and do you
know—now don’t say a word. I know
you are fixing to scold me for my ‘shame
ful extravagance,’ but you needn’t, for I
haven’t got any,” she explains, with a
mysterious little smile. “Let me see;
where was I? Oh, yes; and uo you know,
that dear, kind man gave me a splendid
flask, with his ‘compliments to the
invalid, and he hoped it would do her a
world of good.’ Yes; I know by that
look that you are going to ask me,
where it is, and if you’d just give
me time, I’ll make a full confession.
Don’t run away with the idea that
I drank it, though, because I didn’t.
As soon as I’d thanked him I rushed out,
and lo and behold you, it had clouded
up awfully, and was beginning to rain
‘right smart,’ as the countryman said.
When I saw that I really didn't know
what to do. Of course, 1 wouldn't have
an umbrella. That wouldn’t be my luck,
you know, and I had so many little pack
ages that I couldn’t hold up my clothes,
and I was in a dreadful dilemma. I
finally decided, though, that the best
thing would be to make a scamper for
home as fast as my feet could carry mq.
So I took a fresh grip on all my bundles,
and was just striding along with my
most Elizabethan-like strides, when that
most exasperating shoe of mine came un
tied— of course. I would have oa thoso
thin, low thiqgs. That was in tne plot,
you see. I was going wildly along, break
ing my heart, thinking how muddy my
skirts and the tassels were getting—you
know these are my grand state occasion
shoes, ” she remarks, looking despairingly
at them— "when somebody came dash
ing frantically along, with an umbrella
far over his head, and knocked slap up
against me, and down went that precious
flask and was shivered into sixteen
million pieces!” she cries jumping up
and striking a tragic attitude.
"Why, what was the matter with the
man? Where were h's eyes?” Janet
asks, crossly, sitting up very straight.
‘‘Oh, he had them with him, my dear,
and now, who do you suppose it was?
Well, it was the original of that nega
tive that I ! ve been raving over ail day,”
and having announced this piece of news
with telling force, Cleo folds her arms
and looks across at Janet.
Is that so? Well, well! Afterthat, the
Deluge! By-the way, you were in one
at the time. lam amazed. It was fate,
my dear—it was written. Well, and—
go on—what did he do, and what did
you say?” Janie questions in a most
fluttering state of interest.
‘ Say? If you’ll believe me, I never
said anything. I couldn’t! and I sha Ihe
ashamed of myself for ever and a day,
and you’ll blush for me, I know, when I
tell you that 1 actually stood there and
began to whimper. Yes, positively, I
did, and couldn’t help it either. And
what did he do? Well, the first thing
was that he stepped a little nearer, and
held his nice big umbrella over me. then
he lifted his hat, iu the most graceful
manner imaginable, and he said: “My
dear young lady, I beg ten thousand
pardons; aud I am more than sorry to
have been so awkward ns to cause this
accident. ‘What wa3 in the flask?’ he
asked, glancing down. I told him, and
then he fairly insisted on going and get
ting another one tilled for me; but, of
course, I could not permit that, so when
he saw how much in earnest I was he
did not urge me further, but said:
‘Well, at least you'll let me relieve you
of some of your packages, and allow me
the pleasure of seeing you safely home,
or some one else may g> even further
than I did and knock all your packages
out of your arms.’
“Well, he was so very polite and
charming about it all, and did look so
handsome and distinguished at the time,
and his beautiful eyes were so eloquent
that naturally I gave my consent. And
now, who do you suppose he is, after
all?” Cleo demauds, pausing to take
breath. “Here is his card,” with a very
elaborate flourish; “Mr. Julian Van
Ness, at your ladyship’s service.”
“Why, why, Cleo, you don’t really
mean that he is the .Julian Van Ness that
used to live at uncle’s, and that we
romped and played together with?” quite
breathless.
“ Fhe same, madam,’’ with overwhelm-
ing dignity.
“Why, Cleo!” And after this ejacu
lation the young lady seems to subside
into blank and profound amazement,
and Cleo, quite elated with the effect she
has produced, continues:
“Yes, it is the very same youth. Didn’t
I keep telling you how familiar his eyes
seemed? Well, he still makes unrle’s
house his home, and he has gone into
business for himself, and he has just re
turned from Europe—been there six
months—and is immensely wealthy, how
he ever kept from laughing in my face
when I Was so utterly crushed about that
wine, I can’t think. That’s somebody at
the door.”
She flies to open it and comes face to
face with a huge colored gentleman.
“Yes, lam Mi s Cleo Heath,” she in
forms him; then he puts a great bunch
of fieslily-cut, dewy flowers in her
hand, sets a good sized demijohn inside
the door, bows to the bewildered young
ladies and vanishes as mysteriously as he
came.
“Well, did you ever?” Janet cries, ex
citedly.
“Wait until I read this note,” Cleo
makes answer, “and we will probably be
enlightened”:
“To Miss Cleo and her sister, with my com
pliments, and a heartfelt wish that both the
flowers and the wine may cheer your hearts
and make you happy. Very sincerely, your
old friend, Julian Van Ness.
There now! Was ever anything more
charmingly done? Didn’t I tell you he
was the nicest man I ever met?” looking
with worshipful eyes at the flowers.
Two days lajer there comes another ex
quisite bouquet and a note in which
tickets are enclosed for a lecture.
“What are the tickets for, < leo?”
“They are for a lecture that is to be
given this evening at Temple Hail, and
he hopes to see us there. How is it with
you, Janie? Do you think you are able
to walk so far?”
“Far? Why, it’s only a very little
distauce. I went much further than
that this morning. Come, let’s get
ready. ”
Twenty minutes later they find them
selves very nicely seated in the brilliantly
Righted hall. There is a splendid au
dience, and when the grave, dignified
lecturer appears, he is greeted with a
burst of applause. His sub ject is “Spir
itualism and Thought Heading.”
A committee has been selected to see
that there is no black art practised, and
to assist the lecturer. Cleo gives a little
start of surprise, and the pink in her
cheeks grows into a deeper, lovelier hue,
when she makes the discovery that Mr.
Julian Van Ness is on the stage. And
not only that, but the clever lecturer has
bidden him select some one whom he
knows in the audience, and fix h's mind
j upon him, aud he (the thought reader)
will conduct the young man to that per
son. Julian meekly obeys this master
mind.
lie leads poor Julian a merry dance for
a time, but suddenly he starts olf with
fell purpose in his eyes, and in two
seconds the young man is standing be
hind Cleo’s chair, and Cleo’s face is like
a rose. There are a great many wise
and knowing smiles exchanged when it
is discovered where that very distin
guished-looking gentleman’s thoughts
had wandered.
That distinguished-looking gentle
man pays not the slightest heed, how
ever. In fact, he is happily unconscious
that there has been quite a commotion
caused among his party when he is seen
leaning over a charming young lady's
chair.
He bends down and greets them both,
and then tells them in a low tone of voice
that he had simply been obliged to come
there with some friends, but that he
would not be forced to leave with them;
so, if agreeable to the sisters, he would
be most happy to see them home. It is
totally unnecessary for me to chroncicle
their reply, as there was but one answer
possible.
On their way thither Julian amuses
them immensely by relating how he be
wildered the lecturer.
“You see, I had my mind fully fixed
on Charley Howard, ‘but just at that
critical moment I discovered M’ss Oleo’s
face in the audience, and” —with boyish
frankness —“for the life of me I couldn’t
get mv thoughts back on Charley again.
Humiliating, isn’t it, to have so little
mind that there isn’t enough to make it
up?” he finishes, with a light laugh.
The time is six weeks later.
To the two sisters the loner, hot sum
mer days seemed to have fairly rushed
away, so rapidly have they gone since
they made the acquaintance of their
“fa ry prince.” as they have playfully
christened Julian. And well does he
deserve his name, for never did a Queen
on her throne receive more devoted at
tention than did these two unfortunate
orphan sisters. There has been abso
lutely nothing left undone that he could
compass for their benefit, or amusement,
or pleasure. Baskets of choicest fruits
and most lovely flowers; t ckets for
splendid concerts; invitations to delight
ful yachting excursions, ali found their
way to the young ladies’ humble abode;
and, I may add, likewise, the donor of
these gifts also finds his way there with
surprising frequency. His visits are the
most delightful events in their hard
working, dull lives, so no wonder they
are hailed with such manilestions of
pleasure.
In tact, he is due in this cool, moonlit
room in a very few moments now. Cleo
is to have a drive in the park this glori
ous summer night; and contrary to all
the annals of female history, she is quite
ready, and is leaning yonder against the
wide opened window awaiting his ar
rival. As she so stands, with the en
chanting moonlight falling athwart her,
she resembles nothing so much as some
snowy statue, for she is clad all in white.
Her gown is of the thinnest, fleeciest
material, and shows the rounded beauty
of her arms and shoulders to perfection.
The becoming hat she wears, and her
long silk mitts are white also. So charm
ing is the picture that the blood-red
hollyhocks out in the moonlight bend
forward only to look at her. And her
eyes are fixed on them with a dreamy
smile in their velvety depths, and arc so
lustrous that they resemble twin stars.
The dimples in her cheeks have come
forth, and are playing hide and seek in
the light of those orbs. Suddenly she
moves away from the window.
“He is here, Janie, sol'll just run out
to him. Goodby for a littie while. I’ll
not be gone more than an hour,” she
said, gently, bending down and kissing
her sister's cheek; then she steps lightly
out. and is gone.
And Janie?
Well, Janie sits where Cleo leaves
her, and looks out at the blood-red
hollyhocks, too, with a very happy and
mysterious smile on her face. She nods
her pretty fair head at the flowers also,
and whispers. “Yes, it is all arranged
nicely, I'm sure.”
In less than an hour’s time Julian and
Cleo have returned. Janet is slightly
astonished to see them back so soon.
Julian strides into her presence, leading
Cleo by the hand, and wearing a very
happy and triumphant look indeed.
“My Lady Jane, I wish to inform you
that I have done this young person the
honor to propose for her hand, and she
has condescended to accept me. I love
her with all my heart, and ”
Janet puts up one slim hand.
“It is not necessary for you to mention
the fact. I knew it a month ago.”
“You don’t say so!” Julian exclaims,
with great force and brilliancy. Then,
having recovered a little from his
astonishment, he begins again:
“Well, Miss Minerva, what you don’t
know is that we are to be married in
two months’ time. I would not wait
another day.”
And Janie gets up and embraces
them both, and kisses Julian warmly on
both smooth dark cheeks.— Frank
Leslie.
WISE WORDS.
Confidence is a plant of slow growth
in an aged bosom.
A good conscience is to the soul what
health is to the body.
Shame come 3 to no man unless he him
self helps it on the way.
We always like those who admire us;
we do not always like those whom we
admire.
Babylon in all its desolation is a sight
not so awful as that of the human mind
in ruins.
We generally hate those whom we have
injured more than we do those who have
injured us.
We are taught and we teach by some
thing about us that never goes into lan
guage at all.
Nothing is so contagious as example;
we are never either much good or much
evil without imitators.
The forms required by good breeding,
or prescribed by authority, are to be ob
served in social or official life.
Great effects come of industry and
perseverance; for audacity doth almost
bind and mate the weaker sort of mind.
Nobody talks much that doesn’t say
unwise things, as no person plays much
without striking a false note sometimes.
Hypocrisy is much more eligible than
open infidelity and vice; it wears the
livery of religion, aud is cautious of giv
ing scandal.
Where painting is weakest, namely,
in the expression of the highest moral
and spiritual ideas, there music is sub
limely strong.
If you want to have a man for a friend,
never get the ill-will of his wife. Public
opinion is made up of the average prej
udices of womankind.
A poet ought not to pick Nature’s
pocket. Let him borrow, and so bor
row as to repay by the very act of bor
rowing. Examine nature accurately,
but write from 'recollection, and trust
more to the imagination than the
memory.
A Sulphur Spring Incubator.
There are a number of warm sulphur
springs in Elsinore, Cal., and a citizen of
that town is using them for incubating
purposes. He puts a tin pail full of eggs
in a spring whose temperature is 102 de
grees, and in three weeks the chicks
come out. As the temperature of the
spring does not vary, the eggs require
no attention. This beats the patent in
cubator all hollow. —New York Tribune,
ON THE RIVER
Gliding, gliding, gliding on,
O’er the rippling river,
Ere the sunlit day be done,
Ere the stars shine, one by oil
And the shadows quiver;
Gliding, gliding, gliding on,
Gliding o’er the river.
Floating, floating, floating still—
Thou and 1 together—
Dews the royal lilies fill,
Banks are blowing, and the hill
Crowned shines with the heather;
Floating, floating, floating still--
Thou and I together.
Silver, silver, silver stream,
Btar us thus forever;
If the glory bo a dream,
Let the vision fadeless seem,
Let me waken never;
Silver, silver, silver stream
Bear us on forever.
Drifting where the flowerets lio,
Now to slumber hu ll ng—
Tell me, love—if thou and I
• Nevermore shall say “Good by?"
Earth and clouds are blushing;
Drifting on ’neath sunset sky,'
Where the flowers are hushing.
Golden, golden, golden eve!
Come, enwrap the river;
Sweetest benedictions leave,
And immortal garlands weave,
■While thy shades down quiver;
Side by side—oh, golden eve!
Gliding do wn the river.
—Margaret Hajcraft, in Caselfs Magazine.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
Has its ups and downs—The baromo
ter.
Moves in the highest circles—The
moon.
The most popular campaign tune is
Ihe cartoon.
Does the dog watch account for the
barks at sea?
Inspector of light houses —Manager
for a star who fails to draw.
The first man to hang out a “shingle”
must have been a hair cutter.
It is a great day for garden beds when
the rain comes down in sheets.
Ocean steamers may not be athletic,
yet they all “go over the bar.”
You can always find the latest craze at
any well conducted insane asylum.
A picture in your imagination is, of
course, enclosed in a frame of mind.
Why are sailors egotistical? Because
they are always saying “Aye, aye, sir.”
An English paper asks: “Should men
sew?” They should mend, but not sew.
It is never too late to mend.— N York
News.
Even the champion batter of the
League might not be able to make a hit
on the stage or the lecture platform. —
The Idea.
The man who has only one arm, and
that a left one, knows how essential it
is that he should get on the right side of
his best girl.
The safest way for a man to take his
life in his hands is to write it himself
and have it published before he dies.—-
Dumrille Brecz .
A locomotive, a prohibitionist, a cow
ard, a duck and a lemonade all resemble
each other in that they all take water. —
Dansville Breeze.
It is supposed that apartment houses
ire a modern invention of the Evil One;
yet Sh tkespeare said: “Weary flat, stale
and unprofitable.”— New York News.
“Miss, what is your exact age?’*
isked the lawyer. “When Igo out
with my papa I am fifteen years of age;
when I am with mamma, only twelve.”
“ Oh, don’t let the word be nay,”
The lover cried in woe.
“ All right, John Henry,” she replied;
“ It sha’n’t be nay, but no.”
— Harper's Bazar.
btern Father —“My son, if it breaks
my heart I am going to b eak your stub
born will. Dutiful Son —“All right,
father: I'm going to break yours some
day, if it breaks my pocket.— Burdette.
No Soulless Mechanism Needed:
Edison's Agent —“Wouldn’t you like to
buy a phonograph? It will store up
everything you say and repeat it to you.
Want one?” Omaha Man—“No; got a
wife.” — Omaha World.
“Ah, dear'.” he said, tenderly, “how
can I leave you and go to my cheerless
and lonely abode!” “If you make haste,
George,” replied the girl, with a glance
at the clock, “you can go by the last
car.”— New York Dispatch.
“Madam,’’said the landlady, “whenyou
engaged your room this morning, you
said you had no children!” “I haven’t,”
replied madam. “Tnereis a little girl
crying on the floor above. Is she not
yours?” “No; she is an adopted child.”
The Epoch.
Miss Budrose (getting vaccinated) —
“Do you think it will take, Dr. Mon
tague?” Dr. Montague (gallantly)—“lf
it doesn’t take on such an arm, my dear
Miss Violet, I shall have but little re
spect for vaccine hereafter.”—Minne
apolis Tribune.
Captain—“ What made you drop that
pop fly? It was an awful error.”
Stoughton, ’9.—“Captain, I got so
rattled that I saw six balls.'’ Captain
(crossly) —“I should think you mignt
have caught one of them, at least.”—•
, Harvard Lampoon.
The atmosphere with cheers is rent,
The boys outside the fence
Are sure the Giants win at last,
The noise is so immense.
But ah! alas for human hopes,
The mob’s most joyous roar
Was only due to a daisy foul
That struck the umpire's jaw.
—New York Sun.
“It was a severe pnnishment,” said
the father, self-reproachfully, “but it
answers the purpose. It kept Johnny
from runniug on the street.” “You
didn’t cripple the boy, did you?” “No,
I had his mother cut his hair for him.
You ought to see the poor boy.”—
Chicago Tribune.
Thunder and Lightning.—Lightning
rod agent (to boy)—“ls that your father
lying there in the shade, souny?”-..80y
—“No, sir: pa’s away, an’ me and ma is
the only ones to home; that’s a dead
book-agent. D’ye want to sell ma any
thing?” “Thunder, no,” said the light
ning man. The Epoch.
Texas has 7,081,9715 head of cattle,
valued at $51,008,550.