Newspaper Page Text
Ijatic s\Ws,
TRENTON. GEORGIA.
A French engineer has conferred a
blessing on all players of stringed in
struments by inventing a peg which will
not slip
Premier ve uiers says tnat nussia is
done with the Bulgarians and they may
do anything they please, from cutting
each others’ throats to declaring an
empire.
Under the last census of France there
were reported in that republic 190 per
sons who were living at the age of ont
hundred years or more, and 15,153 who
were more than ninety years old.
Every once in a while an anti-mus.
tache crusade is started somewhere in
ttiis country or Europe. This time the
movement has had its revival in Eng
land, and a clean-shaven face is the fash
ion in London.
The lower classes of the Italian people
continue to emigrate in enormous num
bers, and the Italian Government is
much alarmed. The number which left
Genoa last year was 101,200 as against
52,852 the previous year. Most of them
go to South America.
M. de Blowitz, the eccentric Paris
correspondent of the London Times, is
inclined to think that the new French
rifle is a wonderful weapon. He says
that it is both noiseless and smokeless
and sends a bullet with perfect accuracy
a distance of four miles.
An American who lived in France for
five years and saw many rows and ruc
tions, says that Frenchmen who don’t
fight duels always pull hair or kick each
other’s shins. He used to fairly aehe to
to see some one strike out from the
shoulder and score a clean knock-dowu,
but was never gratified.
It is said that there are between fifteen
hundred and two thousand women in
the Northwest who are interested in
ranch and stock property. Many
acknowledge their brands over their
own names, while others are interested
in stock running under other names and
in which they are silent partners.
—
The natives of the Arctic regions have
a barbarous, but effective way of dealing
with the wolves which are a pest there.
Sharp blades are stuck in the ice and
baited. The meat freezes, and in thaw
ing out with his tongue the blade cuts
the tongue, ultimately preventing the
beast from licking the snow, and thirst
finally kills the animal.
According to the investigations of Mr.
Edwin Chadwick, the statistician, the
average life of the English gentry is 50
years, of the shop-keeping class 27 years,
and of the wageworkers 23 years. Out
of every 100 of the children of the shop
keepers 38 die under that age, while no
"less than 48 in every 100, nearly one
half, of the children of wageworkers
die under 5.
Americans have the good habit of
going to oollege. It is said, as to the
learned nations, that in this country one
man in every 200 takes a college educa
tion; in Germany one in every 213; in
England one in every 500, and in Scot
land one in every 600. The grade of
general intelligence is higher in the
"United States than in any other country
on the globe.
Philadelphia is greatly alarmed over
the decline in its grain shipments. Very
little wheat or corn has been shipped on
foreign account during this year, and it
looks as if the latter half of 1888 would
be duller than in the first six months.
The decline in wheat alone is over 4,-
000,000 bushels, and corn about 1,500,•
000 bushels, as compared with a corre
sponding period in 1887.
It may surprise some people, says the
New York Graphic , to learn that Cap
tain Kidd was never legally charged with
piracy, and that after being held in
prison for over two years he was tried
and convicted of killing a mutinous
sailor. If he ever committed one single
act of piiacy the law was not able to
bring forward proof of it. We are glad
to make this correction in favor of Capt.
Kidd, though it come 3 a little late.
Several of the most eminent architects
in the country have been invited by the
trustees of the proposed new Protestant
Episcopal Cathedral, of New York city,
to submit plans for an edifice which
shall be the largest, costliest and most
enduring church structure in this coun
try. The name of the new cathedral
will be St. John the Divine. Land has
already been purchased for it above
Eighteenth street, near the Hudson
River. It is proposed to have the build
ing face Bouth and run back to a depth
of about 400 feet. No inflammable ma
terial will be used in its construction.
The exterior will be of marble or granite.
All plans and drawings must be submit
ted to the trustees on or before the loth
of next December.
The municipal authorities think
crossings are so unsafe in Paris that an
English paper says they have employed
surgeons disguised as policemen for the
purpose of helping the timid people
across the perilous parts of the street*
and boulevards, and to be at hand in
case of accidents.
In view of the celebration in 1892 of
the 400th anniversary of the discovery of
America, the Italian Government has
decided, on the suggestion of the Minis
ter of Instruction, to collect and publish
all the documents and charts relating to
Christopher Columbus. Twelve thou
sand lire annually have been allotted for
the next five years for that undertaking,
which is to be carried out by Senator
Correnti, with the assistance of a
learned commission.
The great American fat stock show
will be held in Chicago this year from
November 13 to 24, inclusive. The
dairy show, the poultry show r , and the
horse show will be held at the same
time. The premium list will be larger
than ever before, nearly $15,000 having
been already subscribed by the business
men of Chicago, and this sum will be
supplementary to the regular list offered
by the State Board of Agriculture. The
entries in all the departments are large.
A curious ceremony was lately held at
Fontainebleau, France, entitled the
“Feast of Carp,” at which the fish are
not eaten, but simply have rings inserted
in their noses, after which they are re
turned to their native element. Numer
ous offers of jeweled rings were received
from Parisian ladies. After the insertion
of the ring, tL:; carp are returned to the
water to the sound of tabor, trumpet and
kettledrum. Experiment proves that
“ringing” does not injure the fish in any
way.
The City of Denver, Col., will soon
have the most powerful astronomical
telescope in the country between Wash
ington and the great Lick Observatory
in California. W. B. Chamberlin, of
that city, has provided the money for the
great telescope, and also will erect, at
his own expense, a stone tower to be
used as an observatory. The famous
Lick telescope is on the summit of Mount
Hamilton, but the Denver instrument,
in University Park, will be 1000 feet
higher.
A soldier named Michael Schmidt has
been hanged in the Alser Barracks of
Vienna for the crime uf wilful murder,
amid a somewhat fanciful military cere
monial. The infantry company to which
he belonged was drawn up in a square
around the gallows; two ad'utants went
through the comedy of applying to the
general in command of the army corfs
for a pardon, which the latter had no
power to grant, and after the man had
been hanged a general salute to the corpse
■was ordered, after which followed/"'*
prayer. __ _
Under the recent act of Congress, ap
proved by President Cleveland, any en
velope, wrapper, or postal card contain
ing on the outside anything which re
flects injuriously upon the person ad
dressed, or any one else, or upon liis
character or conduct, or is plainly
calculated and intended to injure his
feelings or reputation, or bring him into
discredit, or which threatens him. will be
excluded from the mails. Anything in
the nature of an offensive or threatening
dun apparent upon an envelope, outside
cover, or postal card, or conveying the
suggestion that such dun is inclosed, will
be excluded as non-mailable under this
act.
More than thirteen hundred wires ar6
stretched from the shores of Manhattan
Island. The Western Union’s share of
these is about seven hundred live wires.
To manipulate these about 1200 persons
are employed in the main building, at
Dey street and Broadway; and in the
sub-offices throughout the city, includ
ing the Broad street cable office, abnut
225 more persons are needed. This does
not include messengers, the American
District Company,employing about 1100,
engaged in Western Union business. Most
of the other lines arc those of the tele
phone companies, the Postal Telegraph
Company, which is the only competitoi
of the Western Union, having less than
100 wires.
Professor Monroe Smith tells us. in
Political S ierice Quarterly, some must
astonishing facts. Of all the population
of Massachusetts only 855,491 were born
of native parents, while 919,869 had
foreign parents and 119,741 were born of
j mixed parentage. That is, Massachusetts
! is, in fact, a foreign State, for 53.53 per
cent, of her blood is foreign. “There
are sixty-eight cities and towns in the
Commonwealth in which there is an ex
cess of person- of foreign parentage.
The>e towns have 58 per cent, of the
population, while the remaining 283
town 3, which contain a ma ority of na
tive born parentage, represent only 41
per cent, of the whole.” That is, oui
foreign influx gravitates into towns and
cities. .
The English sparrow has become one
of the most serious prob ems with which
the farmers of our country have to con
tend, in the way of scents damaging to
the crops. They are also of equal dam
age to the song birds, and the insectiver
, qus birds of our country.
' FOLLY LAND.
In Folly land what witchery!
What pretty looks, what eyes there b«;
What gamesome ways, what dimpled smiles;
What lissome limbs, what frolic wiles;
What easy laughter, fresh and clear;
What pranks to play, what jests to heart
Old Time forgets to shako his sand;
The Days go tripping, hand in hand,
In Folly land, in Folly land.
In Folly land, one idle hour,
The moonlight had a wizard power;
Its fairy glamour turned mv brain:
I would that I were there again!
We stood together, ’neath the sky;
A bird was chirping drowsily;
He smiled, he sighed, he held my hand.
Ah me! Ah well, —we understand,
’Twas Folly land, ’twas Folly land!
My sober friend, how worn your looks!
Your heart is in your mouldy books.
Here’s half a cobweb on your brow!
I seldom see you jovial now.
Fling down your volumes and be free
To take a pleasure-trip with me.
Como: “Here’s my heart, and here’s my
hand!”
We’ll launch our skiff, and seek the strand
Of Folly land, of Folly land.
—Danske Dandridge.
A STORY OF THE MINES.
BY MRS. NORA MARBLE.
It was a desolate scene as I wandered
among the pitfalls and abandoned work
ings of the Beaver Meadow Coal Mines.
In a hollow of an old and useless strip
ping lay tons of slaty waste, among
which gleamed bits of coal here ana
there. The mineral had long gone its
way to the market, and only the refuse
remained; but even these bits the poor
about the district were forbidden by the
owners to glean.
The winter had been a severe one,and
the coalhandlers’ strike for a few pence
more a day had augmented the sufferings
of the poor, not only in and about the
great city, but extending out to the coal
regions as well; for the barons had shut
down, and was not coal as dear for the
miners as for the rich?
The place looked deserted and dreary
enough, but I walked on, musing over
the fate which doomed the generality of
men to toil and poverty, when suddenly
the figure of a child arose from one of
the heaps and stood before me,trembling
in every limb, and a piteons, scared ex
pression upon his wan, pinched little
face.
_ “Don’t be alarmed,” I said,touched by
his eviden t fear; ‘‘l wouldn’t harm you. ”
_ “Ben’t you come to arrest me for
pickin’ up the coal?” he inquired, faiter
ingly; “didn’t the maisters send ye?”
At his feet I now spied a pail half full
of the precious stuff.
“We h’an’t got no fire,” he said, grasp
ing the pail with his little blue, half
frozen fingers, “and poor granny has
been shiverin’ and moanin’ and huggin’
the baby awful close, sir. She thinks
that keeps it warm, you Know.”
A wan smile flitted over his face as he
said it, but something in his tone brought
a lump to my throat.
“And what is your name?” I next
Inquired.
“Jemmy, sir ”
“And your father—where is he?”
“I dunno,” answered the boy.
“Dead'?” I queried.
“Mebbe. I dunno.”
“And your mother?”
His little lip quivered.
“Mother went to w£-k afore daylight,
lir. She goes out a-wSt.iin’ and scrubbin’
when she can git it. We’ll have some
supper when she gits home—granny and
me will, and I’ll have a lire, ’cause you
know mother’ll be awful cold and
tired.”
“Well,” I said, struggling with my
emotion, “let us fill the pail, and I will
carry it.”
It was soon done, and before long we
stood upon the threshold of a miserable
shanty which the boy called “home.”
He hesitated a moment before opening
the door.
“You ben’t one of the maisters now,
be yet” he asked, solemnly.
“God forbid,” I answered, as seriously, j
“And ye ain’t come to turn us out o'
the cabin?”
“N ever fear,” I smiled; “I corneas a
friend, not an ememv.”
For answer he opened the door.
Home! A carpetless floor, a bed, a
chair or two, a tireless stove.
Cowering close to the latter sat an old
woman crooning to a babe which, she
held in her arms, swathed in rags.
“Lie still, my bairn,” she rhurmured, j
startled by the opening of the door; “lie
still—the maisters shall nae touch ye,
never fear.”
Oh! those hollow cheeks, those
trembling hands, those straggling locks,
that bent, shivering form.
bhe gazed at me curiously at first, with
a vacant, dazed-like stare, then a shud
der shook her frame.
| “Be ye one o’ the maisters,” she in
quired, in a husky voice.
“.No,” I replied, smiling; “no.”
‘-‘I maun a knowed it,” she said, with
a nod, “The deil ne’er eooms a-smilin',
and—and” here her voice fell to a whis
per — “the barons are all sold to the deil
—did ye know that ?”
I made no answer, and she continued
her croouing to the babe in her arms.
“Hush, my bairn,” she said to the
motionless figure: “hush, thy father’s
a-coomin’ —a-coomin’ home the day.
“Has’t reeu him?” slic cried, su Idenly
turning to me; “lius't seen my Sandy?
Mypuir boy, Sandy—did he send ye:”
'I he boy looked at me with a wistful,
touching expression.
* v andy *s the father,” he explained,
i “who w’entaway long ago.”
| At this juncture the door opened and
a woman about thirty years ot age en
tered, with every appearance of weari
ness and heart-sickness iu her form and
fth*/
Lor the first time the boy's eyes
lightened.
“.Mother,” he said, “the gentleman
fetched home a whole pail-full of coai—
see!” and the little fellow spread his
hands over the newly kindled fire, with
a look of pride and satisfaction.
“Hushl” whispered granny; “the
bairn sleeps. Wake her not up to
misery again. It were a blessin’, when
hunger eooms and cold, for us all to
*leep. The maisters canna sell sleep,”
she muttered, brushing with one toil
worn hand the straggling lbcks from
her brow: “though they do own our
bodies, they canna touch the soul.”
“Poor granny!” sighed Jemmy’s
mother. “’tis always the maisters since
that awful day. Sleepin’ or wakin’, ’tis
always the maisters.”
“8h!” again whispered the old
woman, rising feebly and depositing
her burden upon the bed; “sh-h! the
bairn sleeps.”
“The child must be cold, ” I said to
the younger woman. “Its clothing
seems poor and thin.”
.''he smiled strangely and placed her
finger upon her lip.
‘•Tain t no real baby,” whispered the
boy; “it’s only a stick o’ wood the
granny calls the bairn.”
I looked at the boy’s mother inquir
ing!^.
“Yes,” said she, “the bairn died the
morning poor Sandy was taken away.
Granny went crazed, as you see, which
was a mercy, sir, seeiu’ as how she loved
the bairn and Sandy better than life.”
The old woman had returned to her
chair, and, cheered by the warmth, was
sinking into a gentle doze.
“Sandy!” she murmured. “Sandy’s
coomin’ hame the day. The bairn will
nae mair cry from hunger, for the father
is coomin’ hame.”
“Of what dark day do you speak?”
I inquired; “and who took your hus
band away?”
The boy shuddered, and crept close to
his mother’s side.
She hesitated.
“Here, Jemmy,” I hastened to say,
‘ ‘take this money and go to the nearest
store. Your mother will tell you what
to buy.”
He was gone; but, nevertheless, I was
haunted by those solemn, pleading, wist
ful eyes—eyes in which the glad light of
happy childhood had never lurked; eyes
which looked out upon life shadowed by
the wing of poverty and hopeless
misery.
“You may remember, sir,” began his
mother, “the great strike of the miners
in this region in the year 188 —. Sandy,
my husband, sir, was agin it from the
first. He knoweJ it meant starvation in
the end for the miners, and triumph for
the masters. Labor, sir, is the only in
heritance of the poor; and when there's
no labor, there’s no wages, and no wages
means no bread. So while the masters
count their gold and mockingly bide
their tim p , the poor strikers and their
families must sulfer, naught being left
them but to eat the bread and drink the
waters of affliction.”
“True,” I assented; “too true.”
“Well, sir,” she continued, “the men
hart been idle for months, but still they
clung to the hope that, by holdin’ out,
their future would be bettered—that the
barons would see at last that all they
asked for was wages enough to sweeten
labor; something beyond the coarse fare
and the comfortless cabin which had ever
been their portion. So the day came
when even the bit of salt pork and black
bread could no more be had at the com
pany’s store on credit. It was bitter cold
and Sandy had gone out to get the trust
of a pail of coal. He was very white,
sir, when he came back, and there was
that in his eye which made me shudder.
“ ‘Why, Sandy,’ I cried, ‘my man—
why do you look so?’
“For answer he pointed to the empty
pail.
“ ‘They would gie me nane,’ says he,
slow like and husky, ‘they will nae trust
us more.’
“ ‘And why?’ I asked, all of a tremble.
“ ‘They mean to turn us out of the
house to-morrow,’he answered, bitterly.
‘New men, my lass, are coomin’ to take
our places at sixty cents the day.
Foreigners, Jenny, at sixty cents the
day!’
“‘But the bairn, our sick bairn!” I
cried. ‘She has been ervin’ for a sup of
broth since early mornin’. She is
dyin,’< Sandy—dyin’ for the lack of
nourishment.’
“Sandy groaned. He was a big,
brawny man, sir, willin’ to work, and
he well-nigh worshiped the little one
which lay there moanin’ and cryin’ for
the broth which he couldn’t give her.
“We maun get a chicken, Sandy,’
cried granny; ‘try it, mon. The darlin’
is starvin’, can ye no see?’
“ ‘A chicken?’ cried Sandy, with a
bitter laugh. ‘Ye maun as well ask me
for the key of heaven, granny. They
would nae gie me the trust of a pail of
coal the morn. A chicken ! they would
call me mad an I shall ask for it—
mad!’
“Well, sir,” continued the woman,
after a painful pause, “the next day was
cold and raw. A fine, drizzling rain set
in which froze as it fell. The little one
was worse. Bhe lay quite still now, and
moaned no more.
“ ‘They will not turn us out in this
storm, bandy, with a sick bairn, I said;
‘they can never be so cruel as that.’
“ ‘The new men must have homes,’ j
he answered, despairing like; ‘and when
did ye know the barons to show mercy?
Nae, I’m afraid we’ll have to go: but, if
the bairn dies, if she dies, Jenny, I’ll ’
he stopped and clinched his hands, and
muttered something under his breath.
‘‘„ust then came a knock at the door.
Grtnny looked out the window, then
turned with white face and set lips, and
grasped Sandy l.y the arm.
u ‘Be a mon,’ she said, in a low, deep
voipe, ‘be a mon, Sandy’, and dinna let
them turn us out this awfu’ day. Think
o’ your dyin’ bairn, and he a mon.’
‘fSandy shook in every limb, but
answered not a word.
‘(A louder rap now at the door, and an
oati or two.
“Granny wrung her hnnds in agony,
for just then from the bed came a low
moan.
“‘Broth!’ cried the bairn; ‘granny,
broth!’
“ ‘Open the door, Sandy,’ said granny;
‘open the door;’ and taking the little
one in her arms, she stood, like a figure
turned to stone, in the middle of the
floor)
“Jemmy, hardly more than a bahe,
clunf weeping to my skirts as I knelt in
prayer by the tireless stove, asking aid
from One greater and richer than the
owners of the coal mines.
“There was silence for a moment when
the door was opened, then one of the men
laughed.
“‘Come,’ he sad, ‘make feady to be
out of this by noon. You had your
orders yesterday, bandy, and we mean to
enforce ’em.’
“But the bairn is near to dying,’an
swered bandy, choking like, ‘and sure
ye will not tu r n us out in the storm:’
“ ‘Well, if the brat be near dying, said
an offleer, brutally, ‘she may as well die
outside as in.’
“Then,” continued the woman, shield
ing ker eyes with one hand, “I heard a
growl like as from a wild beast, then a
cry of mortal agony, and then—” Her
voice broke, and she half arose from her
chair and looked with a fixed, stony
gaze straight before her.
And.thep?” I queried, after a painful
pause.
“And then,” she resumed, with white
lips, “the man who had uttered that
cruel speech flung up hi 3 arms, swayed
to and fro, and fell at Sandy’s feet with
out life or motion. Then the rest sprang
upon t andy. who stood there da/ed and
horror stricken, white as the dead man
at his feet.
did nae mean to kill him,’ he said,
solemnly, with uplifted hand; -Hod
above knows I did nae mean to kill him.
But the bairn is the light o’my eyes, and
if any of ye I e fathers, ye maun know
how—how— ’ He could say no more,
sir, for the tears which choked him;
tears wrung from his great, loving heart
a heart as tender as a woman’s.
“ ‘Come,’ said the dead man’s friends,
savagely, ‘come. We don’t want any of
your whining. You’ll get a halter for
this day’s work, never fear.
“ ‘A halter!’ exclaimed grauny, dazed
like—‘ahalter for my Sandy!’ Then she
looked at the dead man’s face, and
laughed, such a horrid laugh, sir, that it
curdled the blood in our veins.
“The child no longer moaned, but lay
quiet wjthin her arms. Sandy shook otf
the hands which held him, and stooped
to kiss the bairn.
“ ‘She’s dead,’ he said, quietly; ‘my
Jenny, our pretty bairn, is dead;’ and
without another word turned and w r eut
out the door, never to enter it again.”
“Surely,” I stammered, “he was not
—” I could not bring myself to utter
the horrible word.
“No, sir,” she said, quietly: “but he
was sent to prison for life.”
“And you, and the boy, and granny?”
I inquired—“what did you do?”
“The neighbors helped us to move
here,” she said, wearily, “and helped to
bury the child. Granny’s reason lied
that very day, and as you see, still she
nurses the bairn, and ever in her ear
rings that mournful cry, ‘Broth! granny,
broth by
The door opened suddenly at this
juncture, and in sprang Jemmy, with a
look upon his face which brought us
both to our feet.
“He’s come!” he gasped; “he’s come!
Granny was nac mad when she said he'd
come the day.”
“Who?” cried his mother, a wild hope
gleaming in her eye. “Quick, Jemmy,
tell me! Who has come?”
“My boy, Sandy,” crooned granny,
aroused by the confussion; “’tis my
Sandy come back with broth for the
bairn.”
“Ay, mither,” cried a rough manly
voice at the door, “God be thanked, ’tis
thy boy Sandy come back, indeed!”
The wife stood like one turned to
stone.
“Escaped?” she gasped, with a shud
der, as her husband held out his arms;
“escaped?”
“Nae, my lass,” he cried; “never fear,
’tis not escaped I am, but pardoned,
Jenny—pardoned.”
That meeting was too sacred for a
st r anger’s eye to witness, and so I si
lently stole away and left them; the
strong man shaken with emotion, wife
and child sobbing upon his breast, and
granny, with her “bairn” tenderly
clasped in her arms, smiling npon the
group in placid, sweet content.— Frank
Leslie's.
The Frugal Greeks.
The Greeks are the most frugal and
temperate people of Europe. Gluttony
and drunkenness are rare vices among
them. Their diet is such as it was two
thousand years ago. They eat little
meat; barley bread, goats’ cheese, or
black dried olives and wine make up a
bountiful repast. Bread and wine, or
bread and leek«, form many a man’s din
ner. Ouragoyiatis munched raw beans
with evident relish as his luncheon.
Maize is cultivated in some parts of the
country, and is imported from Italy; but
I never saw it properly treated—it is
generally eaten half-cooked. A large
number of herbs are boiled as “greens,”
and used in salads. Salt fish is prepared
in some districts. Salt is a government
monopoly and is very brown. Olive oil
serves as butter, cream, lard and suet.
The food is generally too oily for an
Araericaan. Honey is often used (as in
ancient times) instead of sugar. Sweet
milk is little used, but many prepara
tions of curds are common; curds and
sugar are made into a toothsome dish.
There are many varieties ot Greek wine,
but almost all are strong and fiery, and
are tempered with water when they are
drank. Wine costs only a trifle (about
eight cents per quart of excellent quali
ty), but is seldom taken in excess.
But the Greeks are not without their
dainties. Rice is much used with meat
gravy, making an excellent pilaff.
Chopped meat is rolled into croquettes,
wrapped in young vine leaves, and fried.
The best olives are much richer and
higher flavored than those sold in Amer
ica. Rich sweetmeats are prepared from
quinces and other fruit. The offer of
some sweetmeats is often among the first
attentions paid to a guest. A delightful
drink is made from the milk of the green
almond. The lukumi is
hardly equaled by any of our confection
ery. In this connection, perhaps, I should
mention the Greek tobacco, which is
cheap and mild, and has a line flavor. —
Scribner's Magazine.
A Peculiar West Indian Malady.
The natives of Jamaica are subject to
a horrible skin disease called the
“Yaws,” supposed by many physicians,
says the New York Observer, to be iden
tical with leprosy; others think it is a
scrofulous affection, and say that it is
only communicated by contact, not being
infectious. However that may be, it is
loathsome in the extreme, for the joints
swell, and turn white, and portions of
the limbs decay and drop off, the poor
victim looks ashy and gray, and lias a
morbid appetite, often eating dirt and
clay. It is said not to be very painful,
and, strange to say, those who have it,
often live to extreme age, though they
rarely recover entirely. In Kingston,
| the numerous and pertinacious beggars
are often these poor crippled wretches,
j and so disgusting in their appearance
that the most close listed individual
would gladly pay a trifle to be rid of
them. It seems to be confined to the
natives, for I never heard of a white man
having it. I suppose it is in some de
gree hereditary, and no doubt the lack
of cleanliness and habits of diet con
duce to it also.
MONOSYLLABLES.
Ifine be the forte ©f words that tax the
tongue
But once to speak them full and round and
clea*.
They suit the speech or song and suit the
ear,
take bells that give one tone when they are
rung;
Dr bird notes on the air, like raindrops flung,
That pour tbeir joy for all who pause to
rear.
Their short, quick chords the dull sense
eharm and cheer,
rhat tires and shrink* from words to great
length strung.
Strong words, of old, that shot right to the
brain
And hit the heart as soon were brief and
terse.
Who finds them now, and fits them to his
sling,
Smooth stones from brooks of English are
bis gain,
Which shall make strong his thought in
prose or verse,
Wills he with scribes to write or bards t*
sing.
—Tlarper s Magazine.
HUMOR OF THE DAY. •
A woman who always makes the train
—The dressmaker.
If all things are well that end well,
how about the hornet?
“No,” said the butter ball; “these are
not hard times with me.”
Always “at par:” Ma, when pa stays
out too late at the lodge.
A silent partner is all right when ht
doesn’t want to have the whole say.
When you lend anybody your fan, yoq
give them a sort of palm leaf to use it.
Some men are good because goodness
pays best, and then, again, some are good
for nothing.
It is difficult for a sailor to make a
tiller of the soil. He can make it of
wood, though.
Mrs. Bernard Beere, the eminent
actress, is coming to America, but not in
a schooner, as has been alleged.
It is a lack of artistic taste and feeling
that prompts an old man with red
whiskers to wear a jet-black wig.
If one’s creditors are adamant, sum
mer ought to be a good time to ask fa
vors, for all are in a melting mood.
“Yes, sir, I’ve walked where formerly
I rode, and I’ve saved enough money by
the operation to have my shoes resoled.”
—jXew York News.
Mrs. Jenks (at dinner) —“Would you
like some of this oyster-plant, Mr. Brim?”
Prim—“No, thank you; I’m a strict
vegetarian. ” — Life.
Some one has asked: “Wheredo flies
go in winter?” We don’t know, but we
wish they would go there in summer.—
Baltimore Am rican.
Blobson—“Don’t yon think that
Dempsey rather plays the fool?” Popin
jay— “No. sir; 1 think that he works at
the job.”— Burling on Free Press.
I Street Lady—“ Will you spend the
summer in Washington, Mrs. Hardup ?”
Mrs. H. —“I suppose so. It’s all I’vt
got to spend.”— Washington Critic.
Customer (getting his hair cut) —
“Didn’t you nip oil a piece of the ear
then?” Barber (reassuringly)—“Yes,
sir, a small piece, but not ’nough to af
fect the hearin’, sir.”— Siftings.
A Lucid Explanation: Teacher (to
class) —“In this stanza what is meant by
the line, ‘The shades of night were fall
ing fast ?’ ” Bright Scholar—“ The peo
ple were pulling down thj blinds.”
Maude (before the laughing hyena’s
cage) —“How mean! Here we've been
twenty minutes and the hyena hasn't
laughed once!” Ella—“Strange,and he’s
been eyeing your new hat, too i ” — -Time.
“Talk of mothers-in-law and sons-in
law not agreeing,” remarked Titmarsh.
“My mother-in-law and I agree. She
says I ought not to have married her
daughter, and I coincide with her.”—
Mercury.
“This butter is really offensive to the
smell,” observed the twc-dollar-and-a
half boarder. “Well, what’s that got t’o
do with it;” remarked the landlady.
“Sensible folks eat butter and don’t
smell it.”
Bishop (on his semi-annual round) —
“And do you remember me Bobby?”
Bobby—“Oh, yes, sir; you are the gentle
man ma scolded pa about because you
smoked in the parlor and nearly ruined
the curtains.” — Epoch.
A little girl in Lewiston, Me., who
was ill the other evening, called her
mother to her bedside and said piteously:
“Mamma, I am awful sick; I just swal
lowed upward,” and her mamma sympa
thized with her. — New York News.
Agent —“Madam, can’t you induce
your husband to take out a life insurance
policy for SIO,OOO in your benefit?”
Madam —“ I’ll try; but I have my doubts
about the benefits. Johu’s got the con
stitution of an ox.”— Harper's Bazaar.
There was a tramp, a graceless scamp,
of cheek he had a lot; he stole each
meal, and once did squeal: “A cucum
ber I’ve got!” But in the night be woke
in flight and anguish sad to see; he
roared in pain, then did exclaim: “That
cucumber’s got me!”
She wanted to take lessons in archery,
but was very, very verdent. “Have you
a bow and quiver?” asked the teacher.
“Ye—ye—yes,” she hesitated, “ l have
a beau, but I haven’t a quiver any more.
He’s been coming for two months now,
and I’m used to it.” — Was'u/<g‘on Critic.
Down in Marblehead harbor the other
day “the fleet lay moored.” A couple of
old fishermen were sculling about and
chanced to look up just in time to spell
out the gold letters on the stern of one of
the yachts: “P-s-y-c-he! Well, if
that ain’t the funniest way to spell fish.”
—Baton Herald.
“ At an agricultural meeting the other
day ‘The Best way to Keep Girls on the
harm’ was discussed. No conclusion
was reached, but we think a barb wire
fence six feet high, minu9 gate*, sur
rounding the farm, would solve the prob
lem. A boy takes his life in his hand
when he attempts to crawl over or under
or through a barbed wire fence, and he
doesn’t wear a bustle, either. —Norris
lo cn Herald.
Flowers, wrote Goethe, are the beau
tiful hieroglyphics of nature, with which
she indicates how much she loves us.