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THE BARB - 3
Roles, Molds, Patterns, and Liberation
by GiBSbn W. Higgins
Technological advances
that have occurred within
the last century have
shifted much of the
productive efforts of
populations from full time
pursuit of basic necessities
to secondary occupations
such as service, trans-
portaion, and money
manipulation. Energy needs
are met by consuming
natural resources instead
of through manual labor.
The resulting affluence and
freedom from drudgery
caused the abolition of
many plain tasks and the
creation of more elegant
ones, and allowed more
choices of personal life
style.
Problems due to these
advances arose in inter
personal relationships,
however. Males were often
no longer tne sole
provider, and females
were no longer completely
committed to “raising a
family.” The advent of the
nuclear family meant
separation from the older
generation. Working
parents or nonparenthood
meant separation from the
y o u n ge r generation,
causing many people to find
themselves without
intergenerational in
fluences. In the past most"
people became adults with
few options. They inherited
their parent’s moral
values, they worked hard at
a limited variety of tasks
to make*a living, and they
procreated. These realities
were a set of molds within
wnicn most people lived
and died, and thus the
molds made the person.
Variations were allowed
only within definite limits:
soldier, farmer, housewife,
etc.
Greater freedom, social
pressure to fit a mold, and
affluence have caused in
creasing numbers of
people to question the
appropriateness of the
roles they played. Concen
trations of opportunity,
freedom and energy made
liberation ideas inevitable.
It happened to blacks, to
women, and to some extent,
men. Homosexuals fumbl
ing among the coats and
jackets said “what about
us?” Gay Liberation con
sciousness grew in the
minds of many people and
eventually came out, not
as an isolated phenomenon
but as a complex result of
the times. Seeing op
pression and pretense being
cast aside caused a strong
inclination among gays to
do likewise. By sharing
the attitudes of self worth,
gays were able to say' to
themselves and to society,
yes we are different but
we’re as good as you.
People who might never
have admitted their
gayness were suddenly
marching in parades,
causing surprise among all
segments of society, for
such roles were highly un
expected.
So what do the modern
husband, mother, wife,
homosexual, man, father,
and woman have in
common? None knows
where to look for examples
for shaping a life. In the
past, society supplied each
person with a preformed
mold and the individual was
expected to fit in or else.
Now all at once each of us
is faced with an infinite
number of possibilities, and
the result for many people
is so terrifying that their
response is to continue in
the traditional roles as if
nothing had changed. Gay
people share this problem
fully with straights. Young
adults are supposed to get
married people are
supposed to have babies.
If you don’t do at least
one of these you’re
probably queer, and queers
are supposed to be
invisible. They usually are,
and the result for emerging
gays is bewilderment. In
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spite of recent gains made
by individuals and groups,
society still exerts
pressure to conform to
to certain roles (this is
a historical function of
societies)and energy is re
quired to resist. It is
easier to be a model family
(that is until you deter
mine what is best for YOU).
It is also eaiser to be
a nellie queen to speak
softly if at all, and to
accept certain occupations
and lifestyles than to
stand up and say to your
self and to the world that
you are gay and proud and
determine to be what YOU
want to be. For the echoing
reply is “How do you
know what you want tobe,“
and you suddenly realize
that your self . concep'
contains a lot of pure
fantasy because you have
no precedents
It is difficult to grow up
without functioning adults
to pattern your life after.
Since the historical homo
sexual role is restricted to
living invisibly, “those
people” have forever
remained thus. Having one
in the family is un
mentionable. It’s tough for
anyone to grow up knowing
that Mom and Dad aren’t
where it’s at, but tougher
,in not knowing what else
there is . Running away to
New York or California
is acceptable behavior to
some people, but escapism
doesn’t nourish the soul.
Imitation of what you see
isn’t it either, because
having a mold is not the
same thing as having a
model. If all gays visible
to society continue to fit
stereotyped images, gays
as a group will never be
acceptable, and future gays
will never be supported as
they try to come out.
Think of the possibilities
of discarding the mold.
There is as much diversity
among gays as among people
at large. If an emerging
homosexual feels free to be
as he wishes, he can seek
many patterns for his life.
A few generations of
stumbling and gays may
discover that they can live
as full member s of
society. The only drawback
is that homosexual orienta
tions are seldom passed
along to the younger
generation of a family due
to that slight biological
problem, and a feeling
human being would never
try to force his sexual
orientation upon another
person. Each of us, then,
has the responsibility to
become more visible in
our daily living. The rate
of progression is
important, but so is just
plain progressing. Each of
us must work out his or
her own existence and
being seen doing it, and
living it. It sounds like
political rhetoric to say so,
but this is the only means
by which (straight) people
in society at large can ever
accept homosexuality as a
valid lifestyle. Eventually
it must be brought to them.
And it works best on an
individual basis. Southern
whites were able to accept
blacks as much as they have
because of the relative
closeness of living (it’s
the old “some of the ones
I know aren’t so bad”
argument). To most people,
a group of total strangers
is ah amorphous mass
(especially when they’re
“strange”). But get to know
a few individuals from the
group and it becomes “Oh,
they’re OK. I know some
of them.”
What about variations
withing the group? Ac
ceptance will only come
after the variation becomes
crystal clear, and that puts
a burden on those nf us who
feel we can’t afford to
“expose” ourselves for
some reason. The
“faggots” have made a^
commitment to honesty,'
where in hell are the more
orthodox ones? That
personal closet some of us
have left is in a tiny corner
of much bigger but
equally dark social and
legal one. In most places
commission of homosexual
acts is illegal (and also
disapproved of by a major
ity of people). Unofficial
“tolerance” can be taken
away at any time. Each of
us must seize power to kick
open that large door for
ourselves.
So we could conceivably
get our open society, with
gay people living full free
lives. People growing into
maturity would have a wide
choice of patterns after
which to fashion their lives,
and sexual roles would be
forced upon very few
people. But is can’t happen
overnight. Our lives today
have many more opportuni -
ties than just five years
ago. But how about ten
years from now? The
critical part is to
convince society that gay
people are human beings,
entitled t.o full legal and
social \ privileges Gays, in
turn must live decent
positive lives, making
efforts, to be more open
than they thought even
possible. Consciousness
raising is fine, but
external efforts have to be
made to guarantee it was
worthwhile. What will you
do?
Contact
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