Newspaper Page Text
♦ WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2006
4A
Houston .TJmmutl
OPINION
Daniel F. Evans
Editor and Publisher
Julie B. Evans
Vice President
Don Moncrief
Managing Editor
Henderson helps out
South Houston County doesn’t make
the headlines very often. In a rapidly
urbanizing county, it’s still a haven of
farmland and pine groves with homes set
far apart, and families who have lived in the
same area for generations.
Kids in the southern end of the coun
ty still have long rides on school buses.
Homeowners, more often than not, have
wells and septic tanks rather than county
services.
The time will no doubt come when those farm
fields are sold for subdivision development,
but for now it's still part of rural Georgia,
and unincorporated communities like
Haynesville,
Elko and
Henderson
still have plen
ty of peace and
quiet - as well
as some people
who know' how
to roll up their
sleeves and get
to work when
one of their
own needs
help.
Take
Henderson, for example.
On Saturday, a good part of the population
of that small community was hard at work
at Perry High School raising funds to help
with the medical bills of a little girl with
leukemia.
Olivia Culpepper, and her parents, Cindy
and Alan, are part of the Henderson com
munity, and were the beneficiaries of hours
of work selling tickets and still more hours
setting up smokers to grill chicken for more
than a thousand people.
Most of the cooks were in jeans or over
alls, and the cooks were wearing improvised
aprons and caps. The work was hard, and
the logistics complicated, with some trays
being sent to pick-up points in Unadilla,
Byron and Hawkinsville.
It wasn’t glamorous like a celebrity ben
efit, but in our mind, these folks are real
stars and they typify the community spir
it and goodwill of Houston County as a
whole.
As a postscript: In case you missed the
chicken barbecue, you can catch the small
town spirit this Saturday. B-K Connection,
a group from Bonaire and Kathleen, will
be selling baked goods and Brunswick stew
at Ace Hardware in Bonaire to benefit
the Joanna McAfee Foundation, and the
Balvaunuca Club in Perry will have an
all-out Mistletoe Festival at the Georgia
National Fairgrounds to raise funds for
a wide array of community services and
charities.
Letter to the Epttor
A big thank you
During the past 12 years while working for Houston
Healthcare, I was extremely fortunate to work with many
outstanding colleagues. Houston Healthcare afforded me
the opportunity to meet so many wonderful people.
Although I have left the service of Houston Healthcare
and Occupational Health and Wellness, I cherish the rela
tionships I have built over the years with the residents of
Houston County.
I thank the outstanding personnel who worked with
and for me. I deeply appreciate the loyalty, caring and
hard work that these employees exhibited every day! I am
also thankful for all the businesses which chose to utilize
the services of Occupational Health and Wellness. I look
forward to seeing all my friends while out and about in
Houston County!
Linda R. Easterly, Kathleen
Worth Repeating
“Congress can pass a law to do whatever it wants to
do.”
Nancy Pelosi
U. S. Congresswoman (Democrat, CA)
Minority Leader of the House
NBC Meet the Press, June i, 2002
Foy S. Evans
Editor Emeritus
On Saturday, a
good part ol the
population ol that small
community was hard
at work at Perry High
School raising funds to
help with the medical
bills of a little girl with
leukemia.
Unlock die secrets of 'The Drawer'
On a recent day off from work,
I felt the urge to start a fire in
our backyard (don’t ask), but I
couldn’t find a match anywhere.
Building a fire from scratch was
out of the question, because although
I joined the Boy Scouts as a child. I
couldn’t get to the meetings and never
learned about anything combustible.
I could light paper on a stove eye
and run outside with it, but quickly
dismissed that idea for several reasons,
most of them involving the curtains.
There was only one option left: The
Drawer. You probably have one in your
house: a black hole into which house
hold items go, never to resurface. You,
too, might be hesitant to open this
catchall storage bin because of what
happened to that Pandora girl. If there
were matches in my house, though,
they would be in The Drawer.
It was only a little 6-by-19-inch draw- .
er beside the kitchen sink, but here is
some - by no great means all - of what
I found in my search for matches:
- A package of pink balls that, the
label said, you drop into the garbage
disposal to make it smell good. I knew
we had never used these, because our
disposal has chronic broccoli breath.
- A canister of cook’s balm that
“keeps a cook’s or dishwasher’s hands
soft,” a container of moisturizer, a
packet of pain cream and two tubes of
super glue whose caps were on so tight
I couldn’t open them.
- A yellow highlighter pen, a black
permanent marker, a pen from an
Army recruiter and half of a No. 2
pencil.
- A business card from a business
school my wife used to work at that
went out of business.
"Isn't he the same one that pulled the plug to start with?"
Cheese + Book = Best-Seller!?!
The compliment was of the left
handed variety.
“Hey, why don’t you put all
your best columns in a book? I’d buy
it,” an unknown caller told me years
ago.
“Well, thanks,” I responded warmly.
“I’ll consider that.”
“Yeah, see, that way, I won’t have
to buy a paper when you write a stu
pid one,” he added, extinguishing my
moment of glee.
Since that time, I’ve heard the same
numerous times - or something akin
- about compiling my newspaper col
umns in book form for public consump
tion.
Admittedly, the majority of those
suggestions came from my mother, but
there were others as well, mostly from
readers in prison (where I enjoy odd,
immense popularity).
And thus, I present “The Greatest
Book Ever Written About Cheese,” my
first and only book, now available in
bookstores throughout the state.
Why “The Greatest Book Ever
Written About Cheese”?
Well, first off, “The Adventures of
Huckleberry Finn” was already taken.
A more detailed explanation of the
reasoning behind the title can be
found on Page 65 of my tome (entitled
“Scantily-clad Mandrell Sisters Write
Book About Candy”).
You’ll have to read it to understand,
OPINION
- A salad fork, a metal cooking fork,
tongs, a nutcracker, a pasta strainer
and a vegetable brush. The things we
do to food.
- Two 12-foot metal tape measures,
a 5-foot paper tape measure and a 6-
foot tape measure bearing the logo of a
bank that hasn’t existed in decades.
- A large Phillips screwdriver, two
medium Phillips screwdrivers, two
large flat-blade screwdrivers and three
pairs of scissors, which explains why
we can never find any of these tools.
- A dispenser of cellophane tape, a
roll of cloth tape for medical use and
a roll of orange tape whose purpose
mystifies me.
- Leftover parts from when I replaced
the kitchen faucet and the overhead
light fixture - and somehow survived.
- A candle I later learned is called a
tea light, a seashell, emery boards, a
woman’s watch and one jigsaw puzzle
piece with an eyeball on it.
- A Gordian knot the size of a child’s
fist, made of rubber bands, paper
clips, bread-bag ties, safety pins, nails,
screws, picture hooks and toothpicks.
- A plastic plug to put in electrical
sockets so children won’t get electro
cuted. (They probably don’t do much
good in drawers.)
- Clothes pins and a fondue fork,
although we’ve never had a clothes line
although that may not actually help
either.
Another reason this book is titled
“The Greatest Book Ever Written
About Cheese” is that we are try
ing to penetrate a market heretofore
ignored by the book publishing indus
try - cheese-eaters who read. The way
I figure it: People who eat cheese +
people who read = People who would
buy “The Greatest Book Ever Written
About Cheese.”
Yes, I realize I am very clever.
The first column in this book was
written back in 1997, when I was
freshly married to my beautiful bride.
The last entry is from May of 2006,
where I comment in detail about the
trials of being the father of three.
Following the columns from front
to back, you will basically see a mini
autobiographical succession (notice
I didn’t say maturation) of my life,
from my days as a childless newlywed
through the birth of our first child,
then second, then third and all the
Glynn
Moore
Columnist
Morris News Service
Len
Robbins
Columnist
airpub@planttel.net
HOUSTON DAILY JOURNAL
or fondue.
- Two matchbooks (aha!), souvenirs
of our daughter’s wedding. In 1985.
Also, matchbooks from the Pirates’
House restaurant in Savannah and
Augusta National Golf Club. All were
empty.
- Chopsticks, including a pair held
together by a rubber band so a child
could practice. (Actually, they were for
me.)
- A lot of 12-inch wooden skewers for
shish kebabs, some bent and broken
but still sharp enough to gouge.
- A bottle cap with the message “You
win a 20-ounce Sprite.” (I suspect that
offer has expired.)
- A wet-napkin packet from a cruise
we took years before we moved into
our house.
- Three Bic lighters, none of which
flicked.
Finally I gave up and walked next
door to borrow matches. After my
wife came home, I excitedly told her
about the treasures I had found in The
Drawer.
“Where is all that junk now?” she
asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Did you keep anything, or did you
throw it all away?” she asked.
“I put it all back. We might need that
stuff someday.”
She gave me one of those looks that
not only could kill, but also could bury
in the yard. Women are funny that
way.
Now, put down your newspaper and
go delve into The Drawer in your own
house. There’s no telling what you
might find.
Reach Glynn Moore at glynn.
moore@morris.com.
fun, woe, pity, woe, despair, and pitiful
woe in between.
Basically, this book was made pos
sible by the newspaper you’re read
ing. This column is now syndicated in
21 newspapers throughout the state,
in big cities and small towns, from
Donalsonville to Dalton. Without these
newspapers putting my column in your
paper, I doubt Indigo Publishing would
have been so gracious as to publish it.
To them, and you, the very attractive
and obviously intelligent reader, I am
thankful.
For those of you who would like to
purchase “The Greatest Book Ever
Written About Cheese,” it’s available
online at the book’s website, www.
cheesybook.com, and also at www.ama
zon.com.
Retailers that will be carrying the
book include Books-a-Million, Barnes
& Noble, Betty Webb LTD in Valdosta,
Country Bumpkins in Blackshear, City
Market in Valdosta, Carriage Trade
in Albany, and PJ.’s in Perry, among
others. I will also be appearing at sev
eral book signings over the coming
months, to meet and greet personally
the very attractive and obviously intel
ligent folks who would like to purchase
this fine piece of literature.
So, to the gentlemen caller and his
sorted brethren, I have produced the
book you wanted. You be the judge if I
left in a “stupid one” (I did).