Newspaper Page Text
— ■ l|. I "■ . )
Jtoldenhuc&tuHalj
WALTER BLOOMFIELD
Copyriffct IKl by Bossst Bovvzx's Boirr,
CIIAFTER XI.
' Continued.
with swelling nil* and Dying the
Venetian flag the Orio Mallpletro kept
her course. A light breeze wan blow*
Ids. contrary for the Turks, hut favor-
,^«bl* Hor nt, no that wa approached
‘■aeh oihi r hut slowly. The Turks lmd
tired only four times, and our rcssel
had not been touched. Armed with
pistols and cutlasses, our little band
lay upon the deck close to the side
. awaiting whatever might be In store
for us, and aa we so lay I could npt
■dismiss the hope that no barm waa In-
tended to ns, that our alarm was Ill-
founded, and as minute succeeded min-
vte, and attil the Turk did not open
sire upon ns, I expressed my opinion
• to the captain, who lay at my aide, but
he vouchsafed me no reply.
The left horn of the crescent of
Turkish Ships being now quite close,
the Intention of the Turks was per
ceived, , for the foremost vessel left-
her fellows and bore right down upon
'us, still, however, without tiring.
"They hope to take our property and
lives undamaged, but KaMtaber*-
death, net captivity." These Were the'
last words I heard tho noble captain
apeak. After a few minutes of almost
breathless sllcnce.,tho-Turkish' Mgate
fouled,,theAee’fide of the Otto Mall-
pletre and, with a wild about of
triumph, an overwhelming force of
Turkish sailors leaped aboard tho frl-
catoon. And then ensued a (host
bloody hand-to-hand light, of which,
nt flwt, the Venetians had much the
.better. Our enemlee were too close
upon us to permit of tho employment
\>C any weapon but tho cutlass, but of
that we made very effective use, for
.being dose to the aide of the vesseh
nnd our whereabout* unknown to the
best party of Turks who boarded us,'
•hey leaped as It were upon the points
tof our blades, and so suffered great
lota But the odds against us were a
thousand to one, and with fatal effect
the Starks hasted to avenge the defeat
of tbelr fellows. Captain Perugia fell,
dead at my feet, his heart transfixed
by the broad blado of a ferocious Turk
•whom ho had partly disabled: nearly
all our little hand were dead or dying,
nnd above the din of the tight resound--
ed tho shrieks of ths women Im
prisoned beloir.
r I felt faint and sick, and waa besides
bleeding from a wound la my- shoul
der, yet miraculously, la some way
which I am unable to describe, I con
trived to back ont from the fight and
Bee below to the women, whose condt.
Con was truly pitiable, t did so net
became of cowardice, for I believe I
fought aa well aa any man,'Venetian
or Tnrk, that memorahle day, and cer
tainly from the moment tho frigatoon
was boarded I hnf Abandoned all hop*
of'escape, but the warning of the no
ble Perugia, "Death, not captivity,"
- stilt rang In my ears, and t resolved
that my last mlnnto should be spent In!
Bn endeavor to aave these unhappy
creatures from so horrible a fate. 1
reached my cabin, and with a mighty
^ffort palled away a few of the bales
so aa to allow the door to open wldo
enough for me to enter sideways, bqt
I had to contend with tho strength of
the women within, who, not knowing
but It was ths enemy who sought ad-e
pittance, pulled the door the other 1
way with all their might. Aa I eh-
' lend the cabin, and before I could
speak to Its frantic occupants, the
juries rushed down the companion and
began to remove the bales l stood
close by the side of the door, and the
first who entered I laid low with a pis
tol shot In the head. My triumph,
howover, was short, for tho next th-
slant a fearful blow from a mnh
stretched me at full length on the
floor, yet was I only partly stunned,
being conscious of yelling Turks all
around—of Anita and her maid being
bound and carried out, and of my own
ankle* and wrists being bound In such
brutal fashion that the blood atarted
from my fleeh. And then kind nature
came to lny relief and I remembered
no more.
I November 18.—I wa* never able tp
ascertain how long I remained uncon
scious bnt this I know full well, that
when L came to myself again I was a
prisoner aboard a Turkish frigate..
The wound In my shoulder had been
cleansed and dressed, and my wrist*
and.anlkes unbound, but my limbs
were hugely swollen by the barbarous
usage to which they had been sub
jected, and the least movement occa
sioned me acute palo. Two young
Turks, hardly more than boys sat
watching me Intently, convening aoft-
*ly in their language, of which I com
prehended not a word. I waa lying in
a rudely furnished cabin, not unlike a
dismantled gun-room, and looking
around me I perceived nothing of my
town; companions my girdle contain
ing my money and papers the Vene
tian merchant’s cheat* of sequins—
.avnythlng was gone. The terrible In-
cldent* which Immediately preceded
my prater t miserable condition, and
the horrors probably awaiting me,
crowded vividly upon my mind, and,
*Xclaiming -vehemently against my III
(Us 1 fell into a delirium, aud so re
mained for I know nut how long.
.Whan again 1 Mavered myself I
was reposing on a pallet^a the deck
of the earns frigate In charge bf the
WM6- tWO youhg Turks, who sat cross-
legged On either side and eyed me with
an alt Of grave curiosity. We were
close to a port the like of which for
Magnificence I had never seen. The
sea was dotted with ssh'dli drafts and
rowing boat*, blit hot more than two
other Turkish frigates were In sight.
With a heavy heart I observed that
the vessel I was aboard held the Orto
Mallpletro la tow, and that both the
masts of the frigatoon were cut away,
and her naine effaced from her prow
roughly as by an adse. My emotions
were strangely conflicting. I had lost
everything except my life, and doubted
not but It would hare been better bad
I fallen like the brave Perugia, but
the face of nature was glorious be
yond description—pen or brush, wield
ed by whatever hand, would equally
fall to depict It.' 6n a calm sea under
a cloudless sky we drew nearer nnd
nearer to a beautiful city whose gilded
minarets and domes shobe respleUdeat-
ly la the summer sun. The prospect
was *0 entrancing that as I regarded
It 1 momentarily lost thought of my
dreadful plight. Approaching It yet
nearer, a dome of enormous size and
superb proportions met my gaze.
Which I thought could be no other
than the Mosque of St. Sophia In the
city of Constantine. And such, Indeed,
It was.
need tho interrogative sign* which I
made to them When 1 was able to
walk about my prison i experienced
some relief by looking ont of the win
dow an employment to which mjr
guards had no reason to object, for I
was confined on the topmost story of
s tall tower. The view from my pri
son was extremely beautiful Nest
ling among the groves of plane and cy
press -which crown the apex of the tri
angular figure presented by Constan
tinople, t could discern wbst appeared
to be another hut smaller city, very
Jealously Immured, snd from the ex
traordinary splendor of Its marble
and-gllded klosques. Its pavilions, gar
dens and fountains, I was sure It
Man’s Love Versus Woman’s
By HeUa Oldfield
HEBE be fioine Ifabject of never-ending discussion, ill the. more
80, It would seeni, because they ire such as can by b# possi
bility be definitely decided due way or another. Among these
unprofitable questions few ari mofd thoroughly and con
stantly thrashed out than this: “Which tores best, a man or
a woman?”
To this there would appear to be bvf. one answer. Filling
cannot be measured excepting by results, snd even th!#
measure is but partial.
Some men lore more deeply than other men, more devoted*? than some
women, and vice versa. It seems the fashion of late to Insist upon anslyzlng
feelings and emotions, to strive to grasp the impalpable, to discuss men and
.. . . tvomen aS thotigli {hey of different species instead of one flesh, members,
could be no other than the superb pal- I 0 f ^ Mlde f am u y> Humanity ii ihti6b th# same, male aud female. At
ace city called the Seraglio, the home | bne tI|DC ^ Wholly selfish that it thinks only of its own gratification, of Its
of the Grand Turk himself. Every j bwn f r j a j g> vexatious and suffering; at another It will welcome the greatest
day I would stand for hours at my i gacr ifl eeg w jtb the spirit of a martyr, will yield everything and endure anything
window feasting my eyes on the , for tbe gake ot the bc j ove(b j t truthful, yet suspicious; timid, yet bold;
jyealtli df natural beauty before me. • h umble, yet arrogant. One moment if U /epfMcbful and complaining; at an-
Occaslonally there would be a large other jt pollrg fortlx praises arid tender prrite#f#ti6riS; Weeping one hour and
.assemblage of Persons within the gar- ; gmI1Ing and g j n ging the next, nri ond kndw* #b*t to expect of it nor what
dens enclosed by the outer walls of , pljnge It mny aggume# An thIg np pites as ifrdl-to iftefl as M women, and none
the Seraglio, the gates would ne ; determine upon which side the balance sways lowest.-
opened, aud a procession of grandees, The balance ot prooi of Htrdng hjia iiT e*i#tifatd affection, as evidenced by
blazing with Jewels and brightly col- . desperate deeds, such as murder arid Sriicide, is largely tipott the masculine
ored silks, come forth, accompanied i g , dfe of th( , ledger. But against this fact may be charged another—namely,
~ "* vnman ■ j h at man may ^ jf b e be BO disposed, shout his love from the housetops. Peo
ple may consider him n fool nnd suspect him of luriacy, but, since love is not
infrequently accounted madness, he will have no such measure of scorn and
contumely meted out to him as is the portion of the woman who openly parades
an .unrequited attachment. Tradition and custom are inflexible in demanding
tnougu i guessed tnat on suen occa- j tbat gbe gbfl || be g jj ent In guch cnge nn( j b lde her wound, however painful. It
sions he Sul an was a o o : j 8 n s instinctive with a woman as with a wounded deer to creep to cover when
hurt through the heart. (
No one can dispute the fact that men often love devotedly and suffer cruelly
- - T . . , from the inconstancy or heartlessness of worn eft, but fate, here as In many
In « ' ®*l* er things, Is on their Side and against the woman. A man has many re-
f J, Tnnn P ii£.nt««t miMnnr * sources, chief among which Is his Business, for hard work Is a sovereign anti-
t Iniw 1 dote for mental troubles, He can get awajf from tbe familiar places which
™ , , - j . - . . . speak constantly of ills sorrow,' can make himself a new life and create a new
low long I had been In my prlaon. „ lh „ mn . t „„
by the music of strange Instruments,
the strains of which would sometimes i
faintly reach my ear,,but I was at too ;
great a height to make out the priori- |
pal figures In the procession, and j
though I guessed that on such occa-
through the streets of bis city I did
not know so positively.
At last all trace of my bodily inju-
CHAPTEB XII.
BOOM MnttMxi bis Bxconn con-
bLUDBD.
November 22.—Though gradually re
covering from the effect! of the terri
ble strain to which I bad been sub
jected In tbe recent fight, ettd tbe cruel
wounds Inflicted by my captors on my
ankles and wrists, I was still unable
to help myself in any way. The vessel
I wae aboard being arrived alongside
tbe quay. It was found necessary to
carry me ashore, which was according
ly done by tbe same two young Turks
who had tended me since the day of
my capture. I was placed on a litter
and eecnrely strapped to It; not, I be
lieve: because of any fear that I should
attempt to escape, but to prevent my
falling off. These preparations made,
there came to me a Turk, older nnd
more handsomely dressed than the
young Turks, my attendants, who re
garded me with great attention for
several minutes. He then stooped to
where I lay bound, and, slightly rais
ing my left hand, took a gold signet
ring from my third llngor, and pro
ceeded to examine It as one would ex
amine anything rare and strange.
With an air of great calmness nud
satisfaction he placed my ring on the
corresponding finger of his own hand,
and then gave an order, the purport of
which t did not understand, but one of
the young Turks went away nnd re
turned almost Immediately, carrying a
piece Of crimson ellk. Tho Bilk was
placed over my fafe, so that I could
see nothing, and tbe litter upon which
I lay was lifted and carried I knew
not whither.
It seemed a long time before my
face was again uncovered, but I have
since thought that It was perhaps not
moro than ten or fifteen minutes.
When next I saw the light of day I
was In a small square apartment, fur
nished as .simply as the cabin of the
Tnrklsh frigate I had Just vacated. It
had hut one window, and that long
and narrow, and the wall wherein It
was set being of great thickness It
seemed little more than a silt. How
ever, it sufficed to admit tho sunshine,
which streamed In upon me with so
much brilliance that It dispelled the
despair engendered by my unhappy
situation. Tho old Turk, still wearing
the ring which ho hod taken from me,
was present when my face was uneov-
ered and the straps of my litter un
loosed. I addressed him In Kuglish,
French and Italian, bnt he returned
no answer, busying himself In Issuing
orders to my attendants aud some
other Turks there present — for my
benefit, as I afterward found. A car
pet of exquisite workmanship and col
or was brought In aud laid upon the
floor, and afterward luxurious cush
ions, covered with rich yellow all.,
were pieced around by the walls,
some of these latter was I carefully
laid, and the litter on which I had ar
rived wae carried away. A howl of
sherbet and a dish of delicious fruits
were act down within my reach, my
two young attendants took up positions
near to me with their legs crossed
upon cushions Inferior to those ou
which I lay, tbe other Turks withdrew,
and a moment after sounds reacbca
me as of- the door being barred on the
outer aide.
In this small room, then, was I kept
a close prisoner for many days—how
many I know not, for I had lost count
of time. I was liberally supplied with
food and my wounds were carefully
tended, so that I made rapid progress
toward recovery. My sufferings were
now chiefly mental. I wearied my
brain In the endeavor to think why I
waa thqa Incarcerated, and what was
Intended to be done with me, but
failed to satisfy myself. The uncer
tain fate *of the unhappy Anita In
creased my anxiety, but I could learn
nothing, neither could I act in any
not how
but I observed that the days appeared
somewhat shorter than when I was
first brought there, and that the heat
Of noon was less oppressive. I was
about to assert tbnt these facts led
me to reconsider my position, but that
would not be accurate, for Ite consid
eration was nerer for a moment ab
sent from my mind, yet could I In no
way account for tbe treatment meted
ont to me, which must be, I thought,
at once useless and expensive to my
captors. One morning my brow wos
feverish from prolonged thinking of
these things, and I was more than usu
ally oppressed with a sense of my pow
erlessness to help myself, when I was
startled by tbe sound of my door being
unbarred. I did not know the hour,
but from the appearance of the clt]
below I knew It wa* too early for the
arrival of my guards, and the regular
Ity of their attendance wae a promi
nent feature In the maddening monot-
.ony ot my life. Boon my curloslt;
was turned to Inexpressible delight as
a middle-aged gentleman In European
drees entered my room and extended
hie right hand toward me, saying In
excellent English, '-Good morning, sit
It your name Trueman?”
I could not restrain my Joy at hear
Ing my native tongue spoken once
more, more especially as tho words
employed were of a kindly sort, ahd
the question such es caused my heart
to beat fast In anticipation of release
from my bonds. I stepped forward to
selzo the proffered band of the Eng
lishman (for such I conceived he was-
with so much eagerness that he re
treated a few paces to where my
guards were now standing, and lnvol
untarlly held np his arm to keep mo
off. "Softly, my friend,” said tho
stranger, “I Intend yon no mischief
Be seated, I pray yon, nnd tell mo
truly and briefly how it Is you come to
be here.” and to Inspire me with conll
denee he patted me gently on the
shoulder nnd sat himself down on a
cushion. 8entlng myself by his side,
nnd suppressing as well as I was nble
the great excitement under which I
labored, I narrated the whole of my
story Just ns I have recorded It In this
volume. The stranger gave careful at
tention to my recital, at no point In
terruptlng me with a question or com
ment, but sitting quietly stroking hie
long brown beard. When I had
finished my story he still remained si
lent for n minute or so, and then, look
Ing up at me, said:
To be continued.
ntmospbere; while the woman, poor son), must Usually “Stay put,” with no
chnneo of escape from her ghosts nor ability to seek "fresh fields and pas
tures new.”
Woman’s faith aiid nnfalth, man's unshaken truth and man's contemptible
treachery, these are to-day, as they have been from tbe beginning, the never-
falling theme of poet and romancer, the threads Interwoven with all human
history, the underlying currents Of life and love. Some sMps are wrecked nnd
btliers arrive safely nt their desired havetl, and none can proohesy beforehand
which shall be saved and wblcb shall be lost
<zr
Checkmated.
I never felt so cheap before In my
life,*’ declared the well-known busi
ness man. “I am a great stickler for
honesty, nnd I simply will not have
any one around me of whom I have
the least suspicion; and when I find
n man that I know I can trust I re
gard his honesty as a valuable asset
aud pay him accordingly. The result
has been that I have gathered around
me a force of employes of whom I
am justly proud, from the janitor up
to the cashier. The other day my old
office boy left me, and I was obliged
j hire a new one.
“Out of the numerous applicants I
selected a bright and honest appear
ing boy and put him at work. Then
the old question arose. Was he hon
est? 1 am old enough'to realize that
appearances are sometimes deceitful,
and I resolved to test the boy in a mild
way. So one night when I left for
home I left a nickel prominently dis
played upon my desk. After reaching
home I felt sorry for what I had done.
I realized that by my act I had been
placing temptation in the boy’s path,
and that there was little to excuse
ray plan; so I was very much relieved
the following morning to find the
nickel where I had left it. Then I saw
there was something there that I had
not left, and that was a bit of paper
upon which the money lay, and upon
which was written in the new boy’s
Every Man’s Ear Tells
the Story ot His Lite
By Loeb Wclntrob
HE ear, to have any significance nt nl), must have the outer
rim corresponding to the skull. Whatever point on the skull
Is more eminent, that part of the ear corresponding to it
should he the most in evidence, and you will note that what
ever group of faculties predominates, to those faculties docs
the whole ear point.
The principal thing to notice is the convolution inside of
the ear, whether the ear protrudes from the bead or Is close
to the same, and whether It is large or small.
If the convolution is well in evidence, healthy in color, and running parallel
to the rim, you will always find keen intelligence.
If the rim of the ear is thick, turning over on the inner convolution, It de
notes a thick skull. The brain has not yet fully expanded.
If the ear is shapeless, cramped up, or large snd flaccid, either flat without
any prominence Inside, or the shape of a clam shell, and empty without sny
convolution, no matter how large the bead, it has no capacity. It is a failure.
There Is an ear that Is often mistaken for a sign of the hsrmouious tem
perament. The rim has no particular point in evidence more than another-
nlraost round. The interior of the ear is pretty well developed, but not very
prominent nnd defined—rather meaty, and of a healthy color, with fair-sized
lobes. The people who have such ears arc at all times satisfied with them
selves, and most of the time with everybody else. They nr^ neither mental
nor physical giants, nnd less so in a spiritual direction; but they strike a good
balance between the Individual who Is In a tremendous hurry to go to Heaven
and tho one who is running post-haste to the other place.
The ear that has the upper part developed (judging from the opening, which
Is tho centre,) nnd narrow at the base, without any Indication of a lobe. Indicates
activity and Industry In the direction in which the ear points, bnt those who
havo this ear suffer from malnutrition.
An individual with an ear like this mnst be judicious In the selection of his
foods. Tho theory, that to eat a potful of peas and be nble to lift an ox, and
to eat tbe ox nnd not be able to lift tbe pot of peas, may not be as foolish as It
sounds, in their case.
Be tbnt ns it mny, the diet of peas will not suit the people with a fair-sized
Jobe on their ears and a fair width at the base. The larger the lower half of
the ear the keener Is the relish for the good things of mother egrtb. Whether
they will share their substance with others depends on how large the upper
half of the ear Is.
The perfect ears are those that have fair and shapely development, with a
bread nnd prominent convolution running parallel to a fine rim all the way
around, a fair-sized lobe nnd the cavity in the centre not obstructed. Tbe
whole ear is not too low toward the Jawbone, nor too high up, of a good color
and when viewed in profile with an inclination to point upward and forward.
I When looked nt from the front the inner convolution will be the most in evl
denee, with little of the points nnd lobe protruding. I do not expect you will
know this ear nt once when you see it, so I will tell Its works, nud you will
know it thereby.
The owner of this car will shake the whole world to establish Justice, and
a little harder for mercy. He will shake the trees of the celestial kingdom for
tlie heavenly fruit, ns well as the terrestrial, and more. He will move both
places In order that all of the human family may eat their full share.—New
York Journal
ghe Funny.
Wide of
Life.
14 PERPETUAL PROGRAMME. J
Thi, life ii all * itraspie'
Against the weather ■ nue,
lt’« keeping warm in winter
Andinwnmirekrep.^™^
A TRUISM.
The Debutante—“I think she’s Just
ss pretty es she can be.” '
The Wall Flower—"Moat *h:ls are.
-Detroit Free Presa.
HIS GREAT SCHEME.
Muggins—"How do you manage to
keep your wife In such good humor.”
Bugglne—"I pretend to be Jealous
of her.’,’—Philadelphia Record.
ABSOLUTE CONFIDENCE.
First Statesman—“Ton have, sir. ab
solute confidence, then, In the people?*
Second Statesman—"I hare, sir. I
have made all my money out of them.
—Town Topics.
. THE LIMIT.
Reporter—"Then you think tho na
tional prosperity has touched the high,
water mark?"
Financier—“Well, perhaps not. Still,
I wouldn't advise any more wntor for
the present.’’—Town Topics.
II the Wrong Man Proposes
By Winifred Halt
does a girl feel when the wrong man proposes lo her? Ask
the woman who knew herself what love meant, and then ques
tion the girl who had yet to be touched by Cupid’s arrow. To
tills latter it is merely a trying time, with a certain romantic
charm about it.
Probably it Is a first proposal—that something that comes
into the life of nearly every wroinan. It Is enjoyed. Unexpected or not, there
is a flavor distinctly novel nnd interesting about the experience.
It is amusing, too, she thinks, and she lingers over the thought of it until
she realizes that she has to give an answer, and that, of course, she cannot
think seriously of the proposal; she must say “No.” This is not easy; the lover
is persistent, begs her to think It over, to let him try again in a little while.
It Is difficult to make tlie ardent lover realize that his love can never be
reciprocated, and whether the man hovers around her or goes right away tbe
girl has a trying time keeping the unpleasant part out of her mind. If she has
tasted of love herself, the proposal from the wrong man means untold misery
to a girl.
_ Perhaps it happens her own love is unreturned, unsought, unknown, and,
hand the inscription: ‘To be left uutIC ' * hG 8eG s a love equalling her own being poured out at her feet, and knows
that by no will of hers can she take It up, caress It, and treasure It as all true
love should be treasured.
She has to wound the man who would give his life for her, to gently crush
out all the sweetness of Uls high hopes. To fall to do It completely would spell
prolonged trouble to them both. Her task is difficult, but with in infinite
tact born of pity, she will do what she knows to be right; she will send this
called for.’ I’ve got a smart lad ia
that new boy. Too smart, I’m afreld.**
—Detroit Free Press.
Lady Sneerwell—“Have your daugh
ters accomplished muc- In music?” , ... _ . —
way. my attendants being faithful to j Unfortunate Father — “Yes—the ten- ,ovtr away * nnd try hard to overcome sadness that is left behind for her
their trash nnd always refusing to I ants below have moved.”—Punch. . / battIe with,—New York News,
AN EXCEPTION.
“All the world loves a lover,” quoted
the young than who ,was making hie
first call.
”You haven’t met papa yet, have
you?” queried the fair maid in tlif
parlor scene.—Chicago News.
HER MOURNFUL JEST.
“So you decided to try light house*
keeping?”
“Yes,” said young Mrs. Torklns, “but
after we had two or three gas bills
we wished we could try dark house*
keeping.”—Washington Star.
couldnT imagine.
What’s that rag you’ve got on your
head?” asked the new husband.
“That rag,” rejoined the young wife,
in a tone redolent with sarcasm, “ia
called a fascinator.”
“Why?” queried the inquisitive man.
—Chicago News.
NOTHING DOING.
“Doctor,” said the man who wante<£?
to work him for a free prescriptions
“what would you give for a sort
throat?”
“Nothing,” replied the doctof
promptly. “I don’t want
throat.”—Houston Post.
Miss De Billions—“Ah, Count, would
you love me just as much if I had no/
fortune?”
Count Nokount — “Just as much.”—
'New York American.
HIS THOUGHT.
“I’m going to tell him what I thinfl
of him,” said the angry man. “What!
do you think of it?”
“I think,” was the reply, "that he
must be a smaller man than you
or else you think pretty well of him.”
—Chicago Post
SELF-CENTBEIa
Miss Beemer—“Who is your favorltr |
poet, Mr. Weaver?”
Weaver (who is addicted to versi
fying)—“Really, don’t you know,
think It might appear egotistical for
me to answer that question frankly.”
Boston Transcript.
CAUSE FOR WORRY.
Hewitt—“I understand that the for-
idgn noblemen are beginning to get j
worried.”
Jewett—“Over what?”
■Hewitt—“The way the United States B
Senators are marrying all the Ameri
can women.”—Town Topics.
HER IDEA~OF IT.
Mrs. Newed—“I’m afraid my bus iff
band has ceased to love me,”
Mrs. Homer—“What change do yoff
ifind?”
Mrs. Newed—“None; that's Just thi
trouble. He has quit leaving an
change in his pockets.”—Chica
News.
A WILY PROGRAM.
“Why is your Majesty so frequen
ly reported dead?” inquired the C
nese Empress’ most intimate maid
honor.
It’s a little idea of my own,” w
the answer. “It enables me to
even with editors who are remiss
the matter of obituary notices inste
of waiting until it is too late.”
Washington Star *
