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THE SUN.
IMRrWKLI., HART CUV NTT, UA,
AYEBS & McQILL, Editor.
FOR PKENU>%M',
GEK. SHANCOCK,
r OH PENNSYLVANIA.
FOR VICIM’KKSIDtt.Yr,
HON. W. H. ENGLISH,
(IF INDIANA,
PKKNIWKNTIAI. KLMTItRS.
FOll THE STATE A C I.ARUK :
J. C. C. BLACK, B. E. KEN NON.
ALTERNATE:
LUIHF’ct J. GLENN, A TY'ADAM.s
WHTKICT ICrKCfORH;
First District—Samuel ]>. Rtadwell.
of Liberty. A Iterimte—Jiwuphiis Camp,
of Emanuel
Second District—Writ. M. Hammond,
of Thomas. Alternate— Wm. Harri-ou’
of Quitman
'I lord D’strict—Ohiistopher C. Smith,
of Tel‘air. Alternate-James Bishop!
Jr.. of Dodire.
Fourth District—Lavender R. Ray,
of Coweta Alternate— Henry C. Came
ron. of Harris
Fifth District—Jno I. Hall, of Braid
ing- Alternate—Daniel 1\ Hill of FuL
ton
Sixth District— Reuben B. Nisbet, oi
Putnam. Alternate—Fleming G. Du
Bignon, of B ildwin.
Seventh District—'Thos. W. Akin, of
Bartow Alternate—Peter W. Alexan
der, of Cobb,
Eighth Drlriet— Sesliorre Reese, of
Hancock, Alterna e— James K. Hines,
of Washington.
Ninth District—Wm E. Simmons, of
Gwinnett. Alternate—Marlon G. Boyd,
of Whitt'.
STATE l>K TMM'KXTM’ TIl'HF.r,
FOR GOVERNOR:
NORWOOD or COLQUITT.
FOR BICRKTARY OF STATE :
C RARNErr, of Baldwin.
FOR CO*i I‘IROi.LGR-uWNKRAI.:
WM. A. WRIGHT, of Richmond,
FOR TREASURER;
I>. N. SPEER, of Troup-
FOR ATTORNEY GENERAL :
CLIFFORD ANDERSON, of Bibb.
Spanish Living and Dying.
|Castilian Days.]
The Spanish father is absolute king
and lord l>y his own hearthstone, but liis
sway is so mild that it is hardly felt. A
light word between husband and wife
sometimes goes unexplained, and the
rift between them widens through life.
They cannot be divorced—they will not
incur the scandal of a public separation
—and, as they pass lives of lonely isola
tion in adjoining apartments, both think
rather better of each other and of them
selves for this devilish persistence.
If men are never henpecked except by
learned wives, Spain Would be the place
of all others for timid men to marry in.
The girls arc bright and vivacious, but
they navo never crossed, even in school
day excursion, the border lines of the
ologies. They have an old proverb which
Coarsely conveys this inea—that “A
Christian woman in good society ought
not to know anything beyond her cookery
book and her missal.”
An ordinary Spaniard is sick but once
in bis life, and the old traditions which
represent the doctor ami death as always
hunting in couples still survive in Spain.
In all well-to-uo families the house of
death is always deserted immediately
after the funeral and the stricken cams
retire and pass eight days in inviolable
seclusion. Children arc buried in coffins
of a gray color, pink or blue, and carried
open to the grave.
A luxury of grief consists in shutting
up the house where a death has taken
place and never suffering it to he opened
again. 1 once saw a beautiful house
and wide garden thus abandoned in one
of the most fashionable streets of Madrid.
The wife of a certain Duke had died
there many years before. 'The Duke
lived in Paris, leading a rattling life,
butlie would never sell or “.let” that
Madrid home. Perhaps in his heart,
that battered thoroughfare, there was a
silent spot where, through the gloom of
dead days, he could catch a glimpse of a
white hand, the rustle of a trailing robe,
and feel sweeping over him the magic of
loves dream, softening his fancy to
tender regret
. - Nevada Justice.
[Western £xchatigc?.]
A man was brought up before Justice
Moses to-day charged with an assault.
When asked where he worked lie said he
was a miner in the North Bonanza. Here
the court, according to the officers, leaned
over his desk and called the defendant
up to whisper in his ear.
“How wide is the ledge they struck
last week?”
“Thirtv-six feet, your Honor, and as
says S7O, was the whispered reply.
“I think the evidence is sufficient to
warrant a conviction,” continued the
court aloud and straightening up. “The
case is dismissed, and the costs taxed to
the complaining witness.”
Justice Moses was seen down town a
few minutes later giving an order for 200
•hares of North Bonanza without limit.
The Hartwell Sun.
By AYERS & McGILL.
YOJ..IY. N(r), 3.
. HUM MR RUITrtKR OH HO.
hr AUCK CART.
No# tell hie all thy hits, .lehny—
Why fiiS-d I plainer *|>-Hk?
FW - y<*ii see my fonliali hesrt lisa Wed
It’swrrrt in my cheek!
You must not lesro me thus, Jenny—
You will not when yon know
It is my life you’re trending on
At every siep you go.
Ah, should yon Bn!l<\*t now, .teniiy k
tVlieu U’ wintry Went Her Mow#
The daisy, Waking out of sleep,
Would cottto up through Uie
Shall out hoilSi la- <>■ the hill, Jenny,
W iierv the all mar he.ti;M crow ? *
You must kiss me, darling, if it’s yes,
And kiss me if it’s no I
It shall be very fine -the (loot
With liosn-vitu#oVcH-ilh,
Apd th’ win'driw toward the harvest field
Where first our lore begun.
What mnrvel that I could not mow
When you came to rake the hay,
For J cannot s|M>ak your name, Jenny,
U I’ve nothing else to say.
Nor Is It strange that when I sa#
V our sweet face In a frown,
I hung my. seyilit)in the apple-tree,
Ami thought the sun was down.
For when you sung the I uno that end*
With such a golden ring.
The lark was made Ashamed, and sat
With heT hefid beneath her wing.
You need not try to speak, Jenny,
You blush and teemlde so,
But kiss me, darling, if it’s yes,
Aud kiss me If it’s no I
A STRANGE STORY.
f-fij . jj f
Extract from AnMTncKini>oCa' t k*ngi!it
Did I tel! them of queer people and
strange experiences?
Yes, indeed, did I.
Can I recall them now?
No—yes. One I temendier, because
it was tne Inost inexplicable affair that
ever befell me —no, aid not befall—but
that has ever come tome “second-hand,
almost as good as new.”
1 found myself one day at a certain
town with no “connection” till six
o’clock iti the afternoon- train that
might make sixteen miles aif'tfour, with
ninety-xtrvmiles to get over. Due on
the platform at 7: 3fit o’clock. That
wouldn’t do. rSo, of course, 1 bad to
have a “siiecial,”
Place and time—Central lowa, some
time ago. Country just a fla t plant, not
the rolling prairie lalid lying further
west; no towns, few villages, fenceless,
treeless; a speck of anything easily
seen afar had any speck existed.
Even the ties were withotit incident.
One after another, one after another, all
•alike*-same Hriirthfst, family re
semblance, lying on the even ground
without so much as a ditch at the side
to break the monotony.
Nothing of interest without, so I
turned my eyes to inspect what might
be found within. They are generally
wide open when they are to look at ma
chines or machinists.
I have traveled behind engines and on
them by hundreds, and have walked
about and questioned and gazed and ex
amined them thoroughly, but always
with fresh wonder and admiration.
Strong as Titans; simple, complicated;
helpful, merciless; beautiful yet terri
ble.
And I never look at them without
wondering what manner of world this
will be when someone learns how to
utilize, not one hundred, or fifty, hut
even fifteen ;>or cent, of steam.
As to their manipulators, fools do not
abound among them. A man needs
brains and logic to be a good machinist.
I like to watch a first-class one listen to
an argument on a subject with which he
may he ever so unfamiliar. He sees
Haws, and show's where the screw's are
loose, and the sequence is broken, and
the point overlooked or bungiingly made
better, half the time, than the combat
ants, though they be no mean ones.
If a man knows a machine, he knows
how to argue from cause to effect, step
by step of the way, and isn’t easily
“bamboozled, ’ and there’s precious lit
tle “nonsense” about him.
My engineer was one of the right sort.
A clear-eyed, intelligent, wide-awake
young fellow from New England—the
last man in the world you would suspect
of drink or either superstitious lliin
flains.
He was explaining to me some of the
mechanism, when, with his right hand
on the lever, he suddenly paused, threw
himself half out of the tittle window,
gazed a moment up the track, then,
turning his head, with his left hand
thrust up before it as though shutting
out some awful vision, drove on.
There was no mistaking the altitude
and its meaning.
“You have run over someone here,
said I.
Yes—no—l don’t know,” he an
swered.
His firemen seemed to notice neither
action nor answer. I gazed at Isith with
amazement akin to horror. “Am I rush
ing through space forty miles an hour
in the keeping of madmen?” thought
I. “l et us see.”
“You don’t know?”
“I don’t wonder you look,” said he,
“and ask, too. Will yon kindly oblige
me by telling me if you saw anything off
to the right?”
“Nothimr,” said I, “but open plain.”
“Nor ahead of us?”
“Nothing but level track.”
“Nor behind us? Did you look?
“Yes, i looked back. There was noth
ing hut track and plain.”
“I knew it,” said he; “knew it just as
well before I asked as afterwards, hut
couldn’t help asking. Don’t you think
that’s queer?”
“/ think you are troubled. That is
more to the purpose. Do you,mind my
asking what nas troubled you?”
“Do I mind? Didn’t I want to tell
HARTWELL, CM., WIT, lf>. ISNtI.
you, and see what, yoy cart make but of
|t?”, ahd. Ho dretk (ils hand Hvet Mu totc-
Htati ailtl across bis clear eyes an though
it were a nightmare that threatened to
unmake him. “It beats me.”
■ “I wouldn’t let it,” smilingly, to cheer
his distreaaed face. “You are too broad
shouldered to stand that sort of treat
ment frbttl ftttytltltlg, At Which he
laughed A little ancL tin; lire mi a je-
Ittarked Ptfedumirlngly “ YoiCjuit mt< h
lb, Ned Fail iT.dl ~TtciVo.i it!
"A b for the story—it isn't much of a
story,, you’ll any wl'tit—YeffT! You Fee L
waa coming down the Bead the-otherrlay
—a good two weeks Ago—a road, Ive
been ovpr hundreds 01 times, and knew
every foot of it. 1 saw off there, at the
ight, instead of that pancake region,
r egular hill country, wild and green
looking, plenty of trees, and among
them, on top of a sort of ridge, there was
a shambling tavern painted red.
“It Wits growing ditsky, and I could
see lights in the tavern, and hear loud
voices laughing and rowing. Directly a.
fellow came piling!ilg dill 111 tiff’ (loot
with his nfit Hfl, a thihnri Mirth unhilt
toned at the throat, and one sleeve loose
and hanging, holdings whisky Little.
He reeled down the hill, stumbled and
stumbled, struck bis foot against a log
near the Isiltnm, and pitched forward
into the ditch half way across the track.
“I saW what Was coming atid had
whistled down brakes and rOv< rsed the
engine. The malt could baVe gnt on his
feet easV enough if it hadn’t been for his
A'lirsetTwhiaky hotiC; hut /e grablied it
aim held it lip so as to save it, and
couldn’t get his balance) of course) with
out both liartds, iiitd so pitched forward
again, and this time flat across the rails,
ami we went over him.
“It was all done in a minute, you see,
and the train stopped, and 1 starting at
Jim here, and he at me.”
“What did you do that for?” said .Tim,
; “jerking her up like ibnt for nothing.”
“My God! tnqfl. Wilt oVer a human
creatnh 1 . and mash the breath out <>f
him, ahd ask what I stopped the train
for?”
“Run over a man!” cried Jim. “ Are
you crazy or drunk?” Rut I didn’t wait
to answer. I streaked Up the track to
where the conductor Was out, and the
brakemcn and passengers all had their
heads out of the windows, and everybody
wanted to know what was the matter,
and there—woll! you know just as well
as I, there was the ojteh country and the
track as flat as my hand, and nothing
else near or far to he seen.
“Drunk! No, 1 wasn’t drunk. I
’don’t drink—EvefT Andit 1 happened
just so?” turning to Jim.
“Just exactly so,” answered the sooty
fireman.
“Yes, just exactly so.” echoed the en
gineer, “and just exactly so I’ve seen it
every day—and done it regularly since
then. And I can’t stand it much longer.
I’ve got to quit. Look at that!” holding
up his strong hand that was shaking in
a way that didn’t belong to its muscle,
nor to the clear blue eyes that had no
drink nor craze in them. “Maybe I can
make a change with a friend of mine
who wants to come West. Anyway,
I’m going to get out of here, lively.”
I Rat and pondered.
“Do you believe me?” said he.
“Relieve you? Of course I do. I’m
not a fool. I know when a man lias
truth in liis face, and you’ve got truth
in your voice, too. for that matter. ’
He smiled, and thrust out his grimy
fist.
“I’d like to shake hands with you for
that—if you don’t care.”
“Rut I do care,” said I, smiling in
turn. So we shook hands.
“Can’t you explain it?”
“No—no more than I can tell you how
a flower grows.”
We reached our destination and each
went his or her way, and so far as I
knew there was an end of mystery and
explanation.
Five years afterward I was at New
Brunswick, aiming for the ten o’clock
train to Philadelphia.
“Drawing-room car,” called I, as 1 ran
down the long, dark platform.
“Drawing-room car this way!” was
shouted from the rear blackness.
“Ah, is it you, Miss Dickinson?
Plenty of room to-night,” and L scram
bled in.
About every official and employe on
the road knows me. So I turned to see
with which conductor I was going, but
did not recognize him.
“You don't know me?”
“No,” said I, yet I found something
familiar in face or voice. “You are a
new man.”
“Yes,” he answered.
“Let me seel let me seel” thought Ts
1 don’t like to be thwarted. 1 alway.
remember people’s faces, and always for.
get their names. I could forget my own
“Who is he? When—where did lever
travel with him?”
“You were not a conductor when I
saw you before. I am sure of that, ’ I
ventu red.
He laughed at my puzzled face and
answered, “You’re right there.”
All at once 1 placed him.
“Ah!” cried t, “ how’s the ghost?”
The man had a fine ruddy color, hut
he turned pale at that—pale as this pa
rC“ Whv, you don’t mean that anything
did really ever come of it?”
“Yes, hut I do.”
“What?”
“Well, I’ll tell you all in a breath—
that’s the best way, and 1 don’t like
talking about it. You know I wanted
to get'away? Yes. Well, I got my
transfer, came to the Philidelpliia and
Erie road, and my friend went West.
“Maybe I didn’t draw a long breath
as I got under way that first day, and
thought I’d left my bugaboo so far be-
Devoted to Hart County.
hind tib. Everything alsmt me was so
aiffe > *(jHt trotn what I had quitted, it
made.me feel like a now inaff. You
know the country the Philadelphia and
Erie runs through?”
“Dm <<w it. Beautiful, fresh ami hilly,
and ftill of streams, with a rough look
ing pad and curving track.”
‘ *N*t sdj he asselitcd, “atid ! went
along It cheerful as A ({ticket, looking at
hvi vhingami full of interest hhtil tit.
ward-Higlitfall -and then -well! I shut
fny arid drove ahead. What else
cotMl do? But mjf ftrcinatt was drag
ging'lt the rO|>e like mad and rousing
Inc, i.nd tjie engine Was jarring and
jbltify, ;lHd presently Stopped.
“ ‘what did you do that fbtf wild I.
“ ‘My God, man,’ cried he,‘run over a
human creature and mash the breath
out w- him, aud thou ask wtiat I stopped
the Haiti for—are you drunk or crazy?*
and he plunged off and I after him.
“Iflldti’t expect to see anything, lv.it
at th right, you see, as the train rail—
theiv Was a bit of it hill, ahd a slnini
blirtjf old red tdvfcrfi, with sortie light*
-diwihgoh top of it, and it lot of people
with tiic conductor and passengers gath
ered al>out something on the road, and
as 1 4'me up— there was a man with his
hat 11, and open shirt, and the whisky
hotUi in his baud, across the track—
The Art of DejlurLire,
'iecre are unhappy mortals who ate art
utteJy ignorant of the art of departure
that more or less decisive measures have
to bi taken to induce them to leave at
all. It Is a distressing episode wheh a
visitor has to l>o assisted in making up
his mind to go away, in much the same
manner as a lame dog is said to In- helped
ovei a stile. It is hard to say which ap
pea r the greater fool under such cir
cuit 'dances—the guest or his host. A
mai is in a decidedly false position when,
Jihv ng enticed another Into hi* house,
he it'll mil >le'to Coax him to go tint of it
aga U. If the art of departure is diffi
cult, that nf ejection is harder to learn.
Tin reversal of the ettginesof hospitality
is a,very undignified pro< dittg. There
are people who are quite callous to all
hints that they have stayed long
enough. The deterioration of the cham
pagne, the increasing lightness of the
claret, the disappearance of the satin
damask furniture under loose covers, and
even the feigned indisposition of the
hoi, have tio oiled it poll such gentle
men. When wearily silting up with
our-guests in the smoking room to al>-
nonnal hours, how anxiously we watch
fJnsr -vignrs Wcotiling shorter and
shorter! and how mortifying it is, when
we think the happy moment has at last
arrived, and that W 8 are to Ire allowed
to retire to rest, to see them calmly
light fresh cigars before throwing away
the ends of the old ones! But some
times non-smokers arc little better be
haved. Rejieated hints that it is getting
late seem merely to have the effect of
making our visitors congregate more
firmly, and, just as we are Imping for a
real move, n wretch firmly fixes his hack
against the mantelpiece, and delib
erately proceeds to open some political
question.
Are Eggs Meat]
Vegetarians will rejoice at a decision
lately given at Leeds, England, by the
stipendiary magistrate. The question
arose upon the seizure of a number of
eggs stated to bo unsound. The solicitor
for the defense objected to a decision
against his clients on the plea that eggs
were not “meat.” According to the stat
ute, it a p pears that the articles subject to
examination and condemnation are set
down as any “animal, carcase, poultry,
game, flesh, fish, fruit, vegetables, corn,”
and so forth. After a lengthened argu
ment on both sides, the magistrate felt
conqielled to dismiss the summons, al
though he expressed an opinion that it
was most desirable that the sale of un
sound eggs should be stopped. The de
cision, as we have said, will be satisfac
tory to at least one section of the com
munity. It has been the custom for
vegetarians to to place eggs in the same
category as milk, and both these articles
are freely partaken of by those who pin
their faith to a purely vegetable diet. To
the rest of the public the result of the
inquiry will not be so satisfactory. Al
though, as the defendants solicitor
states, “a bad egg carried its own con
demnation,” it must be recollected that
there are various degrees of badness, and
that many a doubtful egg may lie
mixed up in puddings and other forms
of rookery with, at least, the prospect of
injury to delicate digestions.
Changcd in Death.
(Haltirnnre Am*n* an.J
A queer transaction was witnessed in
a cemetery at Milwaukee a few days
since ly two gentleman who bad attended
the funeral of a child of a friend, and re
mained walking about the grounds after
the cortege haa departed. The sextons
bad not tilled up the grave when a second
funeral arrived. It was also that of a
child, but the grave prepared for it was
too short. The men, therefore, deposited
the second child in the first grave, and
when its friends were gone actually
transposed the coffins to suit the size of
the excavations. But for the exposure
made by the witnesses the marble iamb
that was to be placed ujsin the grave of
little Mary would have rested upon the
sod that covered over little Jimmy, and
the flowers that were to deck his grave
would have wasted their sweetness u|x>n
the hillock of the little girl that hap
pened to lie buried the same day. The
sextons who had “mixed those babies”
uf> soon found they had raised a hornet’s
nest about their cars by this strange
transaction, and the cotlins were again
taken up and transferred to their pioper
positions in a hui ry.
$1.50 Per Annum
WHOLE NO. *2ll.
Type <rf f haniidf'?' Railroad Trains.
'ihero are certain geitrfal types of
fchafaCter wliiylt a re observable oh almost
evei'y fdllroad train, and with which wii
art 1 so familiar tiifii pay them little
attention. There is the lilittt id many
bundles —a family man of course—wlio
liears in his countenance the painful
consciousness of having lost something
or forgotten soiwething, and who, in a
desperate ClldeaVnr to recover a parcel
Wlili h has slipped down from one arm,
Scatters upon the Cat floor nil assortment
of ntreel* which vwarte frotn (In l other,
Brio ate promptly trodden ilpotl by some
hasty Wretch behind him. There is the
hi an win. is always late, rtrtd who, drop
j'iitg breathlessly into a seal after a brief
fa do with flic retreating train, wipes !>is
perspiring nrOtf, ahd recites to his
nejgiilnir the circumstances of his deten
tion and hurry. There is the ficrtoiw
woman, who, after having studied all
the time tables, scrutinized the placards
on the ears, and harassed the lickct
figelll to lilt l Verge of insanity, allliets
her fellow pa ■* tigers with shrill and
irrtttiiltnis lm|uiries as to whether the
train funs through to Albany, and
whether the ear she Is inis the right
one. Hapless and eareworrt individual!
Small good does the journey do hot, for
the train has hardly started L’fore she
discovers that she inis lost her ticket;
Mini it is not until she is well along to
ward her destination, and has goaded
the eotulio tor into a frenzy and herself
into tears, that she finds the hit of pnsto-
Itoanl in some unexplored recess of her
travel iug-hag, where she had placed it
for sale keeping. Tlu>r is the woman
Who will have the window open, and tlio
irascible old gentleman immediately be
hind her who w ill have it shut. Tlicro
is the market-woman with gigantic
baskets odorous of herring and onions,
and other delicacies. There is the man
who sleeps the sleep of intoxication, and
who, yielding only an inarticulate re
sponse to the protests of the conductor,
gild disclosing about his person no trneo
of a ticket, is presently Intmllml off by
the brakcumn. And there is the multi
tudinous infant—weary, wide awake,
and vociferous—ail object of loathing
and detestatiuu to every bachelor in the
ear.
The Groceries We liny.
Very few groceries are wholly
pure. The Grocer t Manual publishes
some of the adulterations. The cream
of tartrtr found mi sale, it says, is seldom
more than thirty |>er Cent, pure, the
remainder being t-rm alba, or white
earth, and other adulterants. Cayenne
pepper is debased with rod ocher, cinna
bar. vermilion and sulphurctof mercury,
ana the color preserved by red lead ami
Venetian red. Cpfieoisadulteratcd with
pea flour colored with Venetian red.
Liquors and wines are generally made
from cheap rums and whiskies. Milk is
adulterated with water, (lour, starch,
gum, turmeric, chalk, sugar, carbonate
of soda, and cerebral matter; and cream
is made bv the use of gum. Mustard is
seldom sold pure. Preserved moats are
colored with ocher and red lead. Bottles
labeled Worcestershire sauce, etc., arc
often filled with stuff flavored with
dangerous chemicals. Soaps contain
|Miisonous coloring matter that produces
skin diseases. Teas are colored and
doctored, largely in New York and
Philadelphia, with arseniate of copper,
verdigris, mineral green, Prussian blue,
talc, clay, soapstone, and nurnerousother
articles. Much of the tobacco which
men roll like a sweet morsel under their
tongues is made out of the leaves of
other plants, to which arcadded chromate
of lead, oxide of lead, etc. Half the
vinegar sold in the large cities, it is
asserted, is rank poison, made from prep
arations of lead, copper and oil of vit
rol These statements were made in the
Manual in the interest of grocers.
A Woman Who Buried Seven Husbands.
An excellent old gentleman named
Benjamin Abbott died in Hnyrna, Dela
ware, the other day, aged eighty-two.
He was a good man, but, the only nota
ble featuri of bis placid existence ap
pears to ne the fact that he was the sev
enth husband of bis wife who survives
him. This repeated and life long, or as
we may 1 letter say, intermil ted has I
successively Mrs. Trattx, Mrs. Riggs,
Mrs. Farrow, Mrs. Wallace, Mrs.
Berry, Mrs. Pratt and Mrs. Abbott.
In every instance save the first, she has
married widowers, some of them with
a good many children, but slic never had
any children of her own. All her life
has been spent in Smyrna, and ‘ all her
husbands,” says the local paper, “were
buried by the same undertaker. We
also learn from this paper, the Smyrna
Tima, that some years ago Mrs. Abbott,
etc, etc, had a vision in which eight men
stood before her in a peculiarly impres
sive manner, which she has ever regarded
as prophetic of the number of conquests
she was to make. Number seven having
been safely laid away, one can imagine
the trepidation that exists among avail
able bachelors, especially widowers, in
Smyrna, pending the choice of number
'sght.
A Petroleum Kiver in Texas.
A writer in the (ialveston Newt cx
f>reH*eH the opinion that a river of petro
euin is flowing through the subterranean
cavities of Texas. It takes its rise in
the carboniferous strata North of the
Colorado River, and may be traced at
various points on its course to the Gulf
of Mexico, by oil apjiearing on the sur
face of springs, streams and lakes, while
at what is known as ()il Bay, on the gulf,
the water is so covered with oil that the
waves have no effect.
Why wouldn t Oleomargarine do for
a girl’s name? —Cincinnati Enquirer. If
we had a little girl, and hadn’t any but
her, we would call her that.
WAIFS AND WHIMS.
It is a rule of the penitentiary to cut
the locks off before turning the locka on
a prisoner.
The boy who is well-spanked fully
realizes the deep meaning of stern*
juiticc.
“ Bf. careful how you punctuate the
•tore/* is the latest. It means not to
put too much colon.
It's not only hard work to pop the
question, but it is equally hard to ques
tion the fiop alamt it afterwards.
A lame farmer was asked if he had a
corn on bis toe. “No,” he said, “but
I've got lota on the ear."
Cervantes has aaid, “ Every one 1*
son of his owu works." This makes tha
great Krupp a son of u gun.
A man may have a Boston look in his
eye simply by letting his imagination
dwell on tho things tliat have bean.
A cokrksi’oni'ENT wants to know
what is an affinity. An affinity, mjr
dear sir, is something Unit exists be
tween a small boy aud his neighbor’!
grape vine.
A man’s clothes arc not always indi
cative of his character; for a fellow may
wear tho loudest kind of garments and
yet boas mild and quiet as au autumn
sunset.
Fashion understands that a Indy is
in a full dress when tho trail of her
garments cover her form, tho spittoon
§nd three squares of Brussels carpet at
the same time.
A rather gaily dressed young lady
Asked her Sunday-school class what waa
“meant by the [simp and vanity of the
world.” The answer was honest but
rather unexpected: "Them flowers on
your hat.”
IIH itule .Inn* thn edgn of l.|p natch,
Till :m otduct hl kwn cjrca toll on;
lie Htuilclictl ll tip and wall/.cd twajr—
’Thus n |(ia.h Ina U-ad of a melon.
—Joaquin Miller.
► “ How cainc you to be lost?” asked a
Sympathetic gentleman of a little boy he
found crying in the street for his mother.
“I uint lost,” indignantly exclaimed the
little thrcc-ycar-old; “but m m-m-y
mother is, and I ca-ca can’t find her.”
Man wants but little here below, but
it is the opinion of the Canisteo Timm
that he should alway make his want*
known through the columns of a news
a per.
The heavy heart schooled lo disap
pointments, may at last Is-como so weary
and saddened that no sudden and new
disappointment can cause it more than a
passing pang.
“Ail, Louise, mv heart is very des
pondent. Ever since I have gazed into
the depths of those lovely eyes, I—
“ I lush, John! put an air-brake on that
train of thought, l’a has introduced mn
to liis new partner, and 1 ain his for
$2,000,000. That settles it."
IN these words a correspondent lately
introduced a piece of poetry to the notice
of the editor of a newspaper: The fol
lowing lines were written fifty years ago
by one who has for many years slept in
bisgrave merely for his own amusement.”
A BALD-HEADED professor, reproving
a youth for the exercise of iiis fists, said,
“Wo fight with our heads at this col
lege.” The young iiuin reflected a mo
ment ami then replied: “Ah, 1 see; and
you butted all your hair off.”
No mother wearing banged hair should
preserve her photographs. Twenty years
from now if her son should get hold of
ono ho would exclaim: “Onl why did
they put my mother in the House of
Correction I” — Detroit Free PrtM.
"Don't you love her still?” asked the
judge of a man who wanted a divorce.
“Certainly, I do,” ho said. “I lovo her
better still than any other way; but the
trouble is she will never be still.” The
judge, who is a married man himself,
took the case under advisement.
He Would Meddle.
The following, if not, true, is good
enough to be: I’rinee I’eter, of Olden
burg, is at the bead of the Imperial Rus
sian College, for girls, and is very dili
gent in performing bis duties. He lately
decided to see for himself whether there
was any grounds for the complaints of
the poor food furnished at, the Hmoling
Convent, where eight hundred girls are
educated. Proceeding to the institu
tion just before the usual dinner hour;
be avoided the main entrance, and
walked toward the kitchen. At its door
lie met two soldiers carrying a huge
steaming caldron.
“ Halt!” he cal led out; “put that kettle
down.”
The soldiers, of course, olieyed.
“ Rring me a spoon,” he added.
The spoon was produced, but one of
the soldiers ventured to begin a stam
mering remonstrance.
“ Hold your tongue,” cried the prince;
“ take off the lid I insist on tasting it.”
No further objection was raised, and
the prince took a Large spoonful.
“ S ou call this soup?” he exclaimed.
“ Why, it is dirty water!”
“It is, your Highness,” replied the
soldier; “we have just been cleaning
out the laundry.”
fir eat Enterprises.
The present time is fruitful in schemes
of great magnitude. There are already
projected:
Anew suspension bridge over Niagara
river. .
A now Atlantic cable in addition to
that now in process of construction.
A ship-canal across the Isthmus of
Darien.
A ship-railroad across the same strip
of hind, separating two oceans.
A railroad over the desert of Sahara,
connecting Algeria and Soudan.
A canal, which, conveying the waters
of the Mediterranean into the sands of
Africa, shall make a great inland sea and
fertilize arid wastes.
The establishment of watei'-communi
cation between the Black and Caspian
seas.
These Terrors.
War Is a terrible thing, and it is hoped
the day is near at hand when our soldiers
will lie beaten into plowshares, and our
difficulties settled by arbitration. In a
recent engagement between the Chilian
and Peruvian forces, a horse trod on a
•oldier’s bunion, and he yelled so—the
•oldier. not the horse—that you could
heai him two miles. A lieutenant on the
other side was also wounded. His sword
became entangled between his legs*
which tripped him up, and he sustained
a slight abrasion of the left cheek bone.
It is understood that both armies are now
•uiug for peace.