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HEAKST'S SIN DAY AMERICAN. ATLANTA, GA, SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 30,
in Hand
By BUD FISHER
Smiles from Everywhere
Doesn’t Prove Anything.
MI9 he swayed by his prejudices?”
* "I should say so. Anyhow,
he's the sort of a man who cheers
when the hall hits the umpire on
the shin.”
Wouldn’t Pay Twice.
A 8COTBMAN went into a restau
rant and ordered a whiskey and
soda, for which he was charged a
shilling. He complained of the price
and said that he was accustomed to
pay threepence for "a nip of whis
key.”
"Yes, that's well enough," said the
attendant, "but you've got to pay
something here for the surroundings
—the velvet seats, and the nirrors
and the beautiful pictures on the
wall and all that.”
The next day the Scotsman went
into the place again, ordered a drink
and put down threepence. It was a
different waiter, but he protested.
"No, no,’* said the Scotsman. "No,
no, mon; that’s all right. I saw your
pictures yesterday.”
Copyright, ISIS, by tbs Star Company, Great Rrllaln Rights Reserved.
<£ee, vr>o suit) toe dooveO,
JCFF. Tbtif, PLACF (WILL fee
WHEN 0<JR FURniYuR£ i
C*T4 here that eoutj ht i
YMV INSTALLMENT
plan, a Dollar.t)0u,N ["-yw
and y-mf rest y
6.\iFNFUALLV / if'
WHAT Do Yum MEAN \
*5 ? GET OUT OF l
mere . u* Bought
•STUFF ON I
INSTALL MF« t PlN *‘I
\ GIST OUT f—'
A CHAIR FOR.
MR, A. MUTr.
’Twas Ever Thus.
MIT seems to me that Scribbler’s
* writing has deteriorated since
he became famous."
“Oh, it isn’t that. You see, since
he became famous he’s been able
to sell all the rubbish he ever
wrote.”
T1HAT DO YOU THINK
OF THAT <5UY, TRYING TO
SET OUT OF L)t>. THIS 14
A ’j.UiFuL, CHAIR TOO. A 5
ooon ae another onf cofAey
VOU CAN %|T Dou/N.
IT'S KIND
O' 0AR.E HOMJ
Making the Best of It.
<<117HEN people laugh aloud it ts
™ a pretty sure sign they are
amused, isn’t it?”
"Not always,” replied the sad
eyed comedian. "Sometimes they
are merely making an effort to con
vlnce thenjselves that they haven’t
wasted their money."
No Other Kind.
IfTYID you have a bad toothache?”
U “I think so, but If you know of
any other kind of a toothache, per
haps it was that kind I had."
Well Concealed.
My OUR trouble," said the opttrais-
tic friend, “may be a bleesing
in disguise.
’’Well,” sighed the Afflicted one,
“I must say it is the cleverest dis
guise I ever saw.”
•'**//////,
M RS. PECKAM—I never told you
how my husband proposed to
me, did 1 ?
Mrs. Dashum—No; did he propose
to you?
that Guy marc 4
ME SICK. IF THE House
Ui«!>N’T (EMPTY, I'D HIT
HIM WITH 5oMF. THING .
I You CAN TRY this chair
! NOW FOR a- Ujhilf
r AU/AY!
A* WAY .•
IF THERE t"A>L I
ANYTHIMfc IN TK6
HOoiE To THROW.
A't) Hit You with
—w IT .
The DRIVER. SAYS
t Gotta G>tr
*5 OR
TAKE TH6 CHair
6ft OUT of HERjF
op. I'LL HIT :
You ohtm f
THtS r
thf DRivee.
SAYS
An Opportunity
ToMake Money
he might A4
WELL ASK FOR
A Million A4
fnf dollars
SUCH
BR.A5J
iaventor*. men of idea* and mvoahve ability, ihoutd wnh to
day ter our laat of lavaar.oat needed, aad pm or ofered by Iredtnj
manufacturer*.
Patent* secured or acr fee reture-d. ”W»v Same Irraeto™
Fail,” "How to Get Your Patent aad Yeur Money,” aa6 other
valuable booklet* cent froe to any addreaa.
RANDOLPH a CO. C0M
Pateat Attorney*, rw TdSl
618 “F* Street, N. W„ pK
fUSSry WASHINGTON. D. O.
Startling Clo ck Of f er
Worst Ones of the Week Erom the Jokesters
tug it a misdemeanor to send annoy- street car and-seven different women
ing letters to anybody. Very clever claimed it.”
idea, that. I’ll have my tailor locked
Defective Covering.
Burlesque Manager (after first per
formance)—So you consider Lola the
Live Wire’s dance a little too—er—
advanced for this burg, eh? Any
thing we can do to conform to the
local requirements?
Police Captain—More insulation
might help.
Keeps You Thin.
I T'KJENT) (looking over,Brown's un
furnished flat)—And what is
this passage for?
Brown—Passage? Great Scot!
This is the dining room!,
arm
Copyright, ltt 13. tut 8tir CVmpuny Croat Britain Bight* lUwr»nl
Gentle Reminder.
IT was midnight. The burglar had entered
* the house as quietly as possible, hut his
shoes were not padded, and they made some
noise, lie had just reached the door of the
bedroom when he heard someone moving in
the bed as if about to get up, and he paused.
The sound of a woman’s voice floated to his
ears
"If you don’t take your boots ofT when you
nmamM come into this house." tl
N ^LET fl “there's going to be
H| trouble, and a whole lot of
Here it's been raining
for three hours and you
wj|S dare *° tramp over my
EL? Tjjr' m| carpets with your muddy
jB| A Sto boots on. (5o downstairs
and take them off this
Kku WEM He went downstairs
without a word, he
didn’t lake off his boots
instead he went straight
out Into the night again
and the "par who was watting for him saw a
’ar glisten in his eye.
“I can’t rob that house,' he said "It re
minds me of horns.”
Simple and Easy.
rpwo commercial travellers while in a train
got into an argument over the action of
the vacuum brako.
"It's the Inflation of the tube that stops the
traiu,” declared the first traveller.
"Wrong, wrong!” shouted the second. "It's
i he output of the exhaustion.”
Then, when the train arrived at the station,
they agreed to submit the matter for settle
ment to the engineer. That gentleman, lean
Ing condescendingly from his cab, listened
with an attentive frown to the two travellers’
statement of their argument. Thpn he smiled,
shook his head and said-
"Well, gents, ye're both wrong about the
workin' of the vacuum brakes. Yet It’s very
simple and easy to understand. When we
want to stop the train we just turn this valve
and then we fill the pipe with vacuum!”
Awful.
at t THAT was the worst money
* V panic you ever saw?” asked
one financier of another.
"The worst money panic I ever
saw,” was the reply, “was when a
nickel rolled tinder the seat of a
Good Idea.
J ACK HARDUP (with unwonted
enthusiasm)—-By .love! T see
that some fellow is talking about in
troducing a bill into the House mak-
The Tenth Anni-
versary Number of
the Los Angeles
> j ] “Examiner” will
be out Wednesday,
December 24th.
It will be a re-
markable edition.
\ . It will tell you every-
\ thing worth knowing
J about the busiest and
It’s Going to Un
lock the Treasure
House of Facts
About Our Magic
Southern California
Gibson’s Good Points.
rpHK old man had given his sou a very fair
education and had taken him into his shop
The young fellow was —irwnpMB
over-nice about a great I
many things, but the =*» v T«
father made no comment. Me"'
One day an order came in "J
from a customer.
“I wish fo goodness,' f
exclaimed the son, "that L
Oibson would learn to
“What’s the matter with
It?” inquired the father, •
"Why, he spells coffee I|~Ah£t * * •
with a 'k.’ "
"No—does he? I never noticed it."
“Of course you never did," said the son.
pettishly. "You never notice anything like
that.”
"Perhaps not. my son.” replied the old man.
gently; "but there is one thing I do notice,
which you will learn by and by, and that is
that Gibson pays cash.” •
/I JWrB» ' most beautiful place on
ONF / V'lwM the continent.
* _ ^ ^ f It will show all the won-
11 WITHOUT FAIL / ^ 'f Mf ders of a Wonderland.
Six different sections will be
devoted to description and im-
&//& ~ portant information, both for
f ' the visitor, the settler and the
investor.
There is no doubt about your wanting a copy, the only question is,
How many of your friends shall we put on the list? Please fill out the
coupon below’, inclosing 15 cents for each copy you w’ant.
Anniversary Number mailed Anywhere, United States or Mexico,
15 cents a copy. All foreign points, 25 cents a copy.
$‘/:25 The !^ s , tern ” $2^
Nickel Plated ~
Sent Prepaid) A p| ^ „I I Sent Prepaid
by Parcel Post ( “ mllll V^IOCK | by Parcel Post
A GUARANI EED high grade 8 Day Alarm Clock
^ *- offered at a lower price than asked for an ordinary
one day movement. No more danger of oversleeping. You
simply wind the clock and the alarm once, and it will run and
alarm for 8 consecutive Hays. All you do when you go to bed is to
press a little button on the front of the clock. That sets (she alarm.
- L newspaper: "Wanted, capable Junior
clerk; salary, five dollars ■Kes»«n»nj»
A young man applied
>r the situation in these I,
erms: “I beg to offer von i
nv services. Should you
require security. 1 could f/ ' \ri
mint a hundred dollars "V \ V
You do not mention Sun- \ x
■lay—should I have to Gjl-
work on that day? Neither Sv
’o you state whether the f , Uv§>^Jrv
'mider of the position must iyA's*'!' ”<^'1 1 F
he clothed or not, but I ■ V* v -.Lvtq
have concluded tliat he l**^^-*————i
lust at least wear something with a pocket,
>r he would be unable to carry home his
ages!”
LOS ANGELES "EXAMINER,”
Los Angeles. Cal.
Inclosed please find
Anniversary Number of your pape'
Votes for Babies
OW that it is pretty well
cents, for which you will please ssnd the Tenth
to the following names:
assured that
1 ’ women w ill vote, it is time to arouse pub
lic sentiment in favor of votes for babies.
The awful state of our local and general gov
ernment shouts aloud for infant suffrage. It
is vain to look for purttv in government until
the ballot is in the hands of the really inno
cent Let the babies vote!
Taxation without representation Is a horrid
thing and the baby demands justice.
Where He Got It.
TO his mother came a little boy, crying and
- rubbing one of his eyes
"Well, what did the doctor say?' she asked
Tie said I had got a foreign substance in my
. Tommy replied
And I don’t wonder at your getting such a
;teg. the mother said, severely, "seeing that
ou will persist in playing with the Italian
tgan grinder'a boya!"
Western Merchandise and Supply Co.
326 W. Me.dison Street, Chicago, III.
Street.
State
Street
Name
Street
Name
State
—COUPON—
1 his coupon and L2._?5 entitles sender to one "Western” 8 Day
Name
State
Name
State
Western Merchandise & Supply Co,
CHICAGO, ILL
ffiNTED,IDE